₦airaland Forum

The "backfire effect" is a term coined by Brendan Nyhan and Jason Reifler to describe how some individuals when confronted with evidence that conflicts with their beliefs come to hold their original position even more strongly:

source: http://www.skepdic.com/backfireeffect.html

^^
applies to religion conspiracy theories and any deeply held belief.

I challenge your position with facts, then the believer grows more convinced with their arguments, rather than say check, analyse, and then change their beliefs.

Confirmation bias (also called confirmatory bias, myside bias or verification bias) is a tendency of people to favor information that confirms their beliefs or hypotheses.[Note 1][1] People display this bias when they gather or remember information selectively, or when they interpret it in a biased way. source: wikipedia.

All human beings suffer from both the backfire effect and the confirmation bias -- even when they're aware it exists. This I find is far more fascinating than say people arguing to and fro, only really concerned about getting their point across why God does or Doesn't exist.

Everyone here is a product of their nurturing and their natural state of mind. Some people believe more than others. Some people are more sociopathic than others i.e. there are those that can steal, murder, be adulterous and not lose a wink of sleep whilst another human doing the same could be filled with guilt and remorse for the rest of their lives.

We all know the book of Leviticus. It's my favourite book. Jesus often talked about the 'hypocrite' and even defined the term. How many Nigerian Christian do we all know who start quoting Leviticus when it comes to homosexuals, saying how the book calls them an abomination. But how many also choose to ignore the fact that eating shell fish, pork, snails and anything else that crawls (or is without legs) is also an abomination.

People pick and choose based on their nuturing and nature which sins they're prepared to commit and sleep with. I for instance could not walk in a shop and steal something without feeling ashamed or guilty... but could quite easily download and album/film/video game from the internet and not feel guilty. Is it stealing maybe. But I sleep well at night. it's an odd paradox. but anyhow... THINK.

Is she eminently qualified for the job? Yes, will she win? Hard to say but at least getting the recognition of top academics nd financial gurus is enough testament to her worth. Go ahead nne you have nothing to lose.

It's not hard to say if she'll win or not. It's a question of if the American Government wants her in the position (and they don't they want their own guy and always have had an American running the Bank).

Yes it's the World Bank (an International organisation), but America invests the most money therefore America has the most votes. It's very much American controlled.

IMF is a world organisation that very much European controlled....

To cut things short, Western countries like to be in control of the World market so I don't see them giving up any kind of power too soon.

Why is it that you can only find the BIG GAMES i.e. Call of Duty, FIFA etc in this country.

Where can I find a decent selection of games in Lagos in particular for the Wii. I''m an RPG fan and want to get my hands on Xenoblade Chronicles and The Last Story

You cannot economically make a game as big as FF7 on PS3 graphics. Square have said it's too expensive and would take to long.... Also I love FF7. It's my favourite ever game. I would love to re-live the experience on an up to date console. But FF7 is a masterpiece, you start changing things like adding voices etc it wont be the same experience. Any remake will only really let you down.

People keep banging on about a FF7 remake because Square haven't made a better FF since. F13 is a complete let down according to reviews. If Square can make another classic of epic proportions, then people will stop talking about a remake and appreciate it for what it is - a masterpiece that should never be touched.

A study of natural cycle, bio-chemical systems shows the existence of some kind of master programmer/developer. I call all those forces beyond my comprehension nature. To me they equate to "God"

A Deist God isn't out of the question. I could understand that logically. Even if it's an advanced alien race -- that could be some father of mankind type being (like the space jockey from the Alien film). Who knows We could all just be in the Matrix. It could very well be the Moslem God or Abrahamic God that created us, or perhaps reincarnation (budha) etc,

I LOVE the idea of having a soul that lives on. It means I'm not really dead when my body dies. Who doesn't love a good resurrection story. I love the idea of Jesus. So do many. So did people Before Jesus Christ even lived. Take the story of Horus, born of a virgin; under a star, threatened with death as a baby, healed the sick, restored sight to the blind, died on the cross and was resurrected after 3 days. Attis has a very similar story, born of a virgin, was crucified, died, was resurrected after three days -- take Dionysus, born on xmas day to a virgin etc etc etc, there are dozen of these stories before Christ, no one takes them seriously anymore,

My point being, with each generation of human, it seems our egos, superegos, and ID get the better of us. We can't die, we're too important, we must live on, we were created in the image of divinity etc.

Not to say there isn't a soul and all these nice things happen when our body dies, but, I have to take into consideration the fact that I myself don't want to be limited to potentially what, 70? 80? 90 years if I'm lucky.

Godman_n

Nevertheless, personal experiences and documented accounts strongly attest to a life after death. The form however we can never fully understand.

Unless you've spoken to someone who is completely brain dead, then they're not talking from "personal experiences".

Until Nicolaus Copernicus came along and said that the earth wasn't at the centre of the universe, people seemed happy in their ignorance -- that somehow we were at the centre of it all, and had been put here to serve a higher purpose.

As humans, our ego gets the better of us. We think we're the most special, more so than the other animals or beasts roaming the earth/universe. Well unfortunately we as humans aren't alone in our cognitive abilities and it seems that animals are capable of emotion and cognition.

There are more stars in our universe than there are grains of sand on earth, and our sun is almost 100million miles away, maybe we are the special ones in this ridiculously vast universe thats so big it's beyond all human comprehension. Going on probability alone, our chances are very slim.

That said, if there is a soul, that goes on after death, then science will eventually be able to tell us. It's just a matter of time.

^^^
THANKS

Horus

How they are going to download a soul on a robot?. Downloading a mind maybe, but a soul?

The soul is a human invention. In christianity, it's the part of us that lives forever when our body dies. Now if we upload our minds to a computer and our body dies. Have we not retained the part of us that will live on or are we still not dead yet? This separating the mind from the soul is interesting because it says a lot about what people really want more so than what they really know is possible. Is our soul not just our consciousness? And when our mind dies does our soul not die with it? or is there an automatic/instant upload download of the mind to the spiritual Christian realm at the moment of death. I love the idea of our consciousness minds living on after our bodies fail us, but I find that because I'm terrified of death and the not knowing, the idea of the mind living on pleases me more. But the idea of not being able to end is equally as terrifying when you truly think about it.

The Ancient Greeks had their own Gods. And it was these Gods that envied humans because they could die. They had an end. The Gods realised that with their infinite life spans they couldn't appreciate things the same ways humans could, I love my life knowing that my heart will only beat a limited number of times, my eye sight is only getting worse as I age, as is my hearing, etc etc,

breezy047

CINE

Truely it is going to be too wierd to us.

Quote
How do you retain your individuality,  well imo you don't, it's the gen of being. you aren't one individual, more like a cluster that merges together into one.  


Isn't this going to be strange?
Men with no soul or individualities.

sorry i meant to write 'the next generation of being".

Yes off course it would be strange to you and me, The ability to talk to anyone, anywhere, anytime, through a mobile device and even see them as well i.e. skype; would be strange to any human 1000 years ago. In fact they wouldn't even be able to comprehend it. Just like us in todays world trying to comprehend the idea that we may one day be able to significantly extend our life spans through the realm of cyberspace/internet/robotic bodies, by transferring the data of the mind to binary code that can be stored somewhere. It leads to all sorts of complex questions about the transferability of the consciousness, souls/ghosts etc etc, will this occur within our lifetimes, who knows.

But the ever expanding cyberspace universe is just as fascinating to me as the universe we're living in.  The tech for THE GRID (or the next generation of internet apparently 10,000 times faster than our current internet) exists. Each generation will spend less time in the real world and more time surfing the web. As things become more and more virtual we'll be looking to find ways to make our virtual experiences more immersive. The idea of losing your individual status in the sea of code and information, well it's strange yes, but how do you know you lose your soul?, why can't you have a ghost in the shell (machine), or soul in the machine. aren't our bodies just shells anyway. doesn't our flesh/tissue/organs rot when we die. Whose to say there's a soul in the first place, where were these souls a billion years before man existed, ? how important is it to retain our individuality, what would a giant consciouness mean? these are complex philosophical questions which I can't even begin to answer. But I love the subject, for further reading read " the pearly gates of cyberspace" or just watch GHOST IN THE SHELL because it's deeply philosophical, especially the series the stand alone complex.

Great topic, I actually did my dissertation on the relationship between the cyberpunk genre and todays society. Anyone who's a fan of GHOST IN THE SHELL will understand that they've covered this subject matter extensively. The whole idea of having a human brain inside a machine will relieve it of it's 'Ghost' or soul.

That aside, we as humans have always believed in having a spiritual world and the real physical world. Christianity for example has their spiritual world that can't been seen by those in the physical world. The idea of converting wetware of the brain to hardware/software capable of being read as code by computers was made popular by William Gibson's novel Neuromancer in the 70s, which was the major inspiration  for the matrix films.

the ability to convert the brains wetware to code is just a matter of time. listen to the founders of google about their plans for the next generations of search engines to understand that. They claim the technology would be too 'weird' for todays society, technology which they pretty much already have. i.e. having chip implants that allow your thoughts to do the searching which will be seen on a glasses type device.

to cut this short, it's not a question so much of living forever, more that this is the new spiritual realm. the next gen of christianity etc we don't need bodies. we'll live (to steal from ghost in the shell) inside the sea of information (cyberspace). How do you retain your individuality, well imo you don't, it's the gen of being. you aren't one individual, more like a cluster that merges together into one.

@maasoap

@breezy047, a particle (neutrino) has been discovered to have exceeded the speed of light by 60 nanoseconds in September last year at CERN where scientists are working to understand how our universe is formed. The particle travelled from Geneva to Italy. You need to read more, to constantly update your knowledge. You can "google it to learn more about it.

Yet to be proved and looking more unlikely as other scientists run the same tests. i.e. Neutrinos do not exceed the speed of light. The scientists who ran the original tests passed on their results as even they believed there had been a mistake somewhere, and have admitted it could have been down to bad wiring.

A simple google search will show that their results are far from definitive.

Where can I watch this in Nigeria, what channel.?

Otedola's wealth has no precedent. Where did that money come from?  He says his secret is "being focussed on what you want and hard work" The likes of Dangote and Adenuga one can see clear precedent and through line. i.e. they did this, then that and built bit by bit.  With Otedola, he woke up and was a billionaire.

Protest peacefully my fellow Nigerians. I hope he's in and can hear you guys. It'll send a message to other crooks in this country.

Abacha made corruption legal - Human rights watch.

OP, you're trolling us. However, I agree with the poster freecocoa above. When abacha died; people were on the streets crying tears of joy and happiness.

little wonder you have been throwing the word abomination all over the place, even though I am yet to see any post here that has specifically used the word to describe homosexuals( not that i feel otherwise though). I just knew you wrre just vomiting quotes and lines from a book or article, no wonder.

seriously questioning my use of abomination? is this what your line of argument has come to. so i read a book (as people do), i didn't quote because i don't own the book, i paraphrased from said book. it is completed related to the subject matter. i try and justify my arguments using facts.. I don't believe you;ve presented one. i try and back up what i say with evidence. the word abomination is used in the bible to describe ga/ys. that's why i use it, because people often use religion as their means of justification to why hom0s are 'wrong'. why is it an abomination/evil/abnormal.

if realy you have read this thread from page one like you claimed then you will understand where I stand on this issue. I hate it that I have to repeat myself over and over again.

well I keep repeating myself because your line of argument's been debunked already. You have no evidence to back up any of your claims, and you choose not to respond to anything I'm saying rather resorting to juvenile statements about robots and indoctrination.

There is nothing normal about h'omosexualism,

It's a myth, Psychoanalysts have debunked that myth, time and time again. Don\t take my word for it, look it up for yourself. Just like the myth that blacks have extra bones in their calf which makes them run faster (you'd be surprised at the amount of black and white who still believe it to be true).

everyone at some point go through stages of desires- good, bad and ugly- however, as humans we choose to conform to the norms by sticking to what is known to the human anatomy and behaviour as normal.

maybe I'm hoping for too much coming here on nairaland and expecting a rational debate, where arguments are backed up with evidence.

The a'nus as is known is for discharge of abdominal waste not for sex. Just because some pervs claim they are excited by the thoughts of a fellow man's a'nus does not make it normal.

Please, just admit that you're a bigot so we can be done with this. 'perv'? again no basis, no evidence, nothing.  waste obviously comes out the p.e.n.is as well, your aguments too weak to even bother .  

If you want me to give you a pass mark based on fundamental human right then I could as well argue thesame for other social  vices that we sometimes fantasize about but are not allowed by law to express them because they are not only unnatural but against what is generally accepted. Please read up my responses to these issues on this thread and concentrate on the topic instead of making baseless presumptions about my person just to prove a point.

i've read all the idii.otic comparisons to bestiality and prostitution. I think, evil brain dealt with those accordingly no need for me to regurgitate it.

You fail to back up any of your arguments with any evidence, which leads me to conclude that you have no evidence, and your logic/arguments are based on fear/prejudice therefore i feel I am justified in saying that you are a bigot, you need to see that for what it is. you are no different to the racists who used (and continue to use) false science and illogical arguments to justify the slave trade/the attempt at exterminatiing jews etc. history has and i doubt will ever be on the side of intolerance. and unless i see any evidence to back up your claims i refuse to continue any more discussion.

@evil brain, it's a must read, there aren't many books on the subject. In fact I think it may well be the only book (or one of a few) on the history of blacks in britain.

you wouldn't want to be walking the streets in early 20th century london. people thought we were an abomination.

again I will ask;

What is being done to curb the fast spread of heterosexual people turning man-lover.

How do you know there's a fasst spread, or did you just make that up.

op, you know your man, if you feel he's taking advantage then say so. communicate. stand your ground. but if he needs food and is struggling for travel, by all means help him. who knows where you'll be in a years time.

@cine
Perhaps if u had taken your time to read from page 1 (like i did) u would notice that all these your points have been treated. Moreover my post was a reply to evilbrain

umm, yes, I did read all the posts and no you didn't justify your reasoning at all. You have no legs to stand on, most duck the question, because it's prejudice that they base their arguments on.

The problem I have with you is your resort to unrelated arguments and misrepresenting the line of my argument. You sometimes sound like you are regurgitating something you read in a hurry with little understanding.
What are you on about with all these nonsense. I have never claimed homosexualism was a pathological infection, in fact, I have consistently argued that for the fact homosexualism is not a congenital disease shows that it can be learned if allowed to flourish. All these big grammar you are spewing is not in anyway helping your points.

however i would like to add separately that I don't think my arguments are at all unrelated. I've asked several times for people to justify clearly, why they believe such an act to be an abomination, and have stated here why the scientific arguments for are flawed and based on individual bigotry. I find it interesting that you didn't challenge any of the points, rather, challenged my grammatical integrity, said I misrepresented you etc, please, I'm now asking the questiion, as it is imo totally related. do you agree that hom0sexu.al behaviour is normal if not why?

The problem I have with you is your resort to unrelated arguments and misrepresenting the line of my argument. You sometimes sound like you are regurgitating something you read in a hurry with little understanding.
What are you on about with all these nonsense. I have never claimed homosexualism was a pathological infection, in fact, I have consistently argued that for the fact homosexualism is not a congenital disease shows that it can be learned if allowed to flourish. All these big grammar you are spewing is not in anyway helping your points.

Yes, I read staying power in hurry; a 900 page book which touches on scientific racism and then came on here to debate. Please, I type one hundred words a minute, am msn ing, facebook chatting, writing a thesis, debating on here, having a conversation, and watching tv simultaneously as I wait for el clasico to start. YES, I try to back up what I say with evidence, using creditable sources and quotations, from things I've read, instead of just spewing stuff out and expecting you to accept it.

eg.

Little wonder a huge percentage of ho'mosexuals are kids and impressionable adults who have been exposed to varying acts of homosexualism in different forms, from school, church, public, meetings, parties they are always bombarded by this h'omosexualism indoctrination and mind programming.

I challenge you justify with credible evidence/research that any of what you say here is true, so I can respond accordingly.

What is being done to curb the fast spread of heterosexual people turning man-lover.

How do you know there's a fasst spread, or did you just make that up. you need to back your arguments up. It's how a debate works.

back to the original point. You infer that ga/ys may need treatment/a cure to treat their condition. You believe that a child may somehow be infected through influence, if I misread your point or your line of argument, I apologize. It wasn't my intention to mislead.

Utter rubbish!! If this proves anything, it strengthens the argument that if we do not do anything about this group, they will infect -through influence and this kind of g'ay propagander- our young and impressionable childrien with their vice. This despicable study shows that h'omosexualism is a thing of the mind than a natural instict stemming from any congenital disease like a lot of them resort to claiming. Little wonder a huge percentage of ho'mosexuals are kids and impressionable adults who have been exposed to varying acts of homosexualism in different forms, from school, church, public, meetings, parties they are always bombarded by this h'omosexualism indoctrination and mind programming. Let them emphasize more on cure than this evident attempt to justisfy their pervasive s'exual yearnings or are there no stories of homosexuals who successfully left the habits and went back to being straight? What is being done to curb the fast spread of heterosexual people turning man-lover. Why should anyone be exposed to homo'sexualism against their will. How come there is a very positive  depiction of homosexualism in the mainstream media- from hollywood movies to even political campaigns. Who is fulling who??

Hom0sexu ality is not a pathology in need of reorientation/cure/treatment. Science has debunked that myth time and time again. You sound no different from the bigots and racists who used pseudo science to convince the British parliament that blacks weren\t human, which in turn enabled them to justify their racist and bigoted behaviour "oh they're not human so it's okay to treat them like this." The greatest psychoanalysis of our time Mr freud said that homos.exuals aren't sick.

"Scientific heterosexism operates in a very similar fashion to that of scientific racism in that it starts with a priori view - in this case the belief that homosexuality is an aberration - and then creates a body of empirical evidence designed to confirm the very theory it purports to scientifically prove.  The result is a circular form of logic that ultimately has been responsible for creating a body of literature used to pathologize a group of people who, as we now know, are no more capable of changing their sexual orientation as you or I are capable of changing our DNA."

To say that hom0 behaviour is not 'normal' is down to your prejudices, admit it. Just like people often see race as being biological, despite science repeatedly debunking that myth.

Read staying power. There'e a plethora of chapters devoted to the science of the time. e.g. It's why the myth that blacks have abnormal sized/bigger d.i.cks still lingers to this day. Usually down to bigots using anything to justify their behaviour, I mean how else can they sleep at night if they don't justify what it is their doing.

@jedisco

In summary; Homosexuality is an abnormality that although might occur in some lower animals is wrong and can, should and must be corrected.

why is it an 'abnormality'? If you want to be taken seriously in debate, you need to justify that statement, because at the moment it comes across as bigoted.

Also its the gate way to a vicious cycle that includes bestiality, prostitution, Inbreeding, necrophilia etc which all erode our values and must be stopped at the gate (homosexuality)

How is it a gateway to this vicious cycle? It would be interesting to know if you can justify that statement? Or are you just expressing your prejudices? I do genuinely want to know.

@rhymz

Now you have resorted to the argument of force often used by h'omosexual activists and h'omosexuals themselves. Are you sure you are not g'ay cos you sound angry and personal here.

Whether someone's ga.y black, white, muslim, hindu, really shouldn't come into the discussion. This is a moral argument, and as I've said here already, the burden of proof is on those who believe it to be an 'abomination', to justify their reasoning; and I challenge you to do so. What I won't do is challenge anyone to justify their religion, ideology, race, creed, s.e.xual orientation, because it's a completely personal thing, and it's not for them to justify/defend themselves to anyone.

Whether you choose to believe it or not, there is no part of the African culture that supports or encourage H'omosexualism, nobody is saying it does not exist in Africa but the fact is, it is an alien phenomenon and there is no part of the African culture-Nigeria culture in particular- that has h'omosexualism and its likes as an integral part.

Well you're obviously wrong because there are hom0sex.uals in Nigeria. They may well be a minority, and you can pretend they don't exist all you want, but they're there. There are g.ay Nigerians whether you choose to believe they exist, have a community or not. It's like the BNP in the uk trying to tell anyone who will listen that islam isn't part of British culture. Well there are British Muslims, they exist, they're part of the culture.

The examples you have given of the failings of our own culture does not make the practice of h'omosexualism any more apealing or better than those examples you gave; can you honestly claim that the majority of the Nigerian populace still practise them??
Finally, nobody is saying our culture is superior to the west, the fact is, if we are going to change certain aspect of our culture and imbibe news ones it must be the ones that have positve effect, promote our well being, preserve and enhancr our way of life not the nonsense you so adamantly wanr us to copy.

Intolerance has and always will be on the wrong side of history; and people will always campaign for the rights of our fellow human beings. Nobody wants to copy anything, these people exist on our shores, they are here. Get over it. I've met g.ay people, can't say I'm aware I know anyone that's g/ay, maybe it's cos we have nothing in common, like say I wouldn't hang about with a goth. But to say we can't co exist in the same country beggars belief. It's not cos you disagree, it's cos you're afraid of them. In the words of chris rock, don't hate on anyone, cos whoever it is you hate your daughter's gonna bring home.

Some interesting, insightful and funny research for all you hom0 phobes out there: Homophobic men most aroused by gay porn.

"[Investigators] asked heterosexal men how comfortable and anxious they are around gay men. Based on these scores, they then divided these men into two groups: men that are homophobic, and men who are not. These men were then shown three, four minute videos. One video depicted straight sex, one depicted lesbian sex and one depicted gay male sex. While this was happening, a device was attached to the male participant’s joysticks. This device has been found to be triggered by sexual arousal, but not other types of arousal (such as nervousness, or fear – arousal often has a very different meaning in psychology than in popular usage).When viewing lesbian sex and straight sex, both the homophobic and the non-homophobic men showed increased penis circumference. For gay male sex, however, only the homophobic men showed heightened penis arousal.

Heterosexual men with the most anti-gay attitudes, when asked, reported not being sexually aroused by gay male sex videos. But, their joysticks reported otherwise."

Homophobic men were the most sexually aroused by gay male sex acts.

source: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-big-questions/201106/homophobic-men-most-aroused-gay-male-porn

you see, i dont blame many of you here who have supported same sex marriage or rather as you have window dressed it, that preventing same sex marriage by law would set a bad precedent for other laws in the country.

Yes, it is a bad precedent, but far more importantly; the fact that the burden of proof is on you to justify why such an act is an "abomination": and please if you're going to throw bible quotes at me like the silly senators, then he who is free of sin cast, etc. Point is, one too many bible bashing hypocrites on this thread, how many married Nigerian men seem to think it's their right to have mistresses/gfs even though it's 'ungodly', how many of those senators built homes from illicit funds, how many sins have you yourself committed. People commit as much sin as they're prepared to live with. Accept it.

anyways, like i said, it is not surprising at all!most of you have spent all if not most of your lives in the west, so much so that you have lost all respect for everything african!

In early 20th century britain, women weren't allowed the vote. Have modern Brits lost respect for everything British because they don't adhere to the archaic traditions of their great forefathers. Have Jews in the Diaspora who challenge Zionist ideology and everything it stands for lost respect for everything Jewish. It's a weak argument.  

otherwise, how can a black person whose fore fathers were conceived after hard,vigourous, sweaty s*xx in the blessed lands of Africa ever contemplate supporting a thing such as same sex marriage?

I assure you if you go back far enough, history does not support your argument. btw, if you're not hom o sexual, you don't have to have sex with another man.

who ever heard of such an abomination!you all should bury your heads in shame oh ye lost souls of Africa!how disgusting, how shocking and yet how painful it is, that you have forgotten the moral virtues of your forbears! i say shame on you all!for you are all lost indeed and while you mothers weep and cry for this disgraceful generation, may their curses yet follow all of you to your grave! i have said my piece.

There's no need to fear homo sexuals. They won't jump on . They won't try and sneak into your bed. I''m sure you maybe know a few you're just not aware.

I want to address this whole good and evil issue because this conversation came up in my office last week. Everyone was expressing how evil and disgusting they thought homosexuals were. Me, being the adherent of libertarianism that I am, went completely against the grain (as I always seem to do) and started to spoil their little parade. Should have seen the looks on the faces of these forty and fifty something year olds when me their boss (twenty something), started defending said homosexuals. "How can you condone evil"; I was asked. Problem with this hollywood/biblical good and evil thing is that it doesn't really exist in the real world. Everyone is a little sociopathic, some more than most, for example: I couldn't steal money and then sleep at night knowing I've stolen, hence why I don't steal. There are many who can, and then sleep well. There are those who could happily kill another human being, and sleep well. They are not evil in the biblical sense, they are sociopathic to the extreme with psychopathic tendencies. People commit as much sin as their prepared to live with, it's not that the devils in them, it's just that they can live with themselves. Now having explained this to my office, I started getting all these bemused looks. I'm guessing they thought I was some closet homosexual. I'm almost certain there are senators on this bill who are in fact bisexuals. The biggest problem I have with this bill and those who blindly support it and pontificate to those that don't, is that they remind me of the William Lynch's of this world, trying to convince you why those that are different may well be demonic etc. Terrified that if they support the rights of homosexuals people may think that they too are gay. Horrified by that fact. Forgetful that it was intolerance, pseudo science and fear that led to almost four hundred years of slavery.  

OP, it should really read salary(job) vs self employed vs business owner vs big business owner. Self employed is too vague a term. I usually see a self employed person as someone who still has a job/salary, but works for themselves. If a self employed person doesn't work, they don't make money. e.g. a lawyer who doesn't take any new cases, a trader who won't trade etc, not all that much different from a salaried worker. Now an entrepreneur/business owner, like Richard Branson, will have an idea, form a company, raise finance, design a business model, hire far more talented people to get the product out on market, then hire people who know how to run the day to day operations of a company. i.e. he'll get out the way, and still make money. I wouldn't say Richard Branson was self employed, I would say he's a business owner. Now a self employed person can make lots of money, but they won't ever be rich. Rich is when your monthly passive income (the income you don't work for) exceeds your monthly expenditure.

tough one. If she knows you don't like it, she should stop taking those sorts of calls. Having said that, she's surely entitled to a life with friends. I guess it's just a case of her learning to get the balance right. He should communicate his feelings to her properly, and if she still continues, either learn to deal with it or get a divorce.

I've been with a girl like that. Arguing and bickering over nonsense. Suspecting you're cheating because you mention another girl's name. Dig a little deeper and I'll guarantee you'll find that she's probably had some real bad experiences with some disgraceful men and maybe their daddies were a disgrace aswell, so they've got serious mental problems when it comes to dealing with guys and relationships, always suspicious always suspecting you're a bad person, just waiting to catch you out cheating. Run for the hills and don't go back there. Neurotics will drive you crazy.