sexyattorney:
I will have to discuss with her first.

And what if she says NO

vjsmiles:
SHE WILL EVEN ASK ME TO KNOCK HER WITH THE SLAP

Lwkm....how them d knock slap again na??

Nairalanders will you give your mum a dirty slap for that tempting amount??

Me! my mama go disown me if a no slap her




Lets keep it rolling.......

Ooo! Op u make me remember my bosco cross bag
'D' d give swagg die!

A mild drama played out at the Sharia Court, Samaru, Gusau, Zamfara State, during the week, when a housewife, Aisha Dannupawa, asked the court to dissolve her one-week old marriage to her husband, Ali Maizinari, because she could not bear the size of his manhood.

When the case was called up for hearing, the woman told the court that married Maizinari after her first marriage hit the rocks.

According to the mother of three, before she moved into her new husband's home, as tradition demanded, she was invited into his parents' house, which marked the beginning of her nightmare.

She said: "when he came, we had s*x but the experience was a nightmare. Instead of enjoying the s*x, it turned out to be something else because his joystick was too big".

She told the court that after that first painful experience, she took some medication, which was given to her by her mother. "I told my mother the experience but she told me to endure and that with time, I will be able to cope. She then gave me some drugs", she added.

"Two days later, when he came to visit me, we had s*x again but the experience was too much to bear. It was then I knew that I could not continue with the marriage because of the size of his joystick", the distraught wife told the court.

In his defence, Maizinari did not deny the accusation and even told the court that he was willing to grant his wife’s prayer for divorce but on the condition that she pays back the dowry and all that he spent on her during the courtship.

When he was asked to state the amount, Maizinari disclosed that what he expected from her was N60,000.

President of the court, Alhaji Mamman Shinkafi, told the couple to try and reconcile as he refused to dissolve the union.

LIAR'ONS everywer

mirexxx:
meaning?

I bet u don't want to know

Ask any ekaette in da huz

mirexxx:
VULTURE EYES NI

OK...ame'diongho

mirexxx:
my love i sight you
sowi ma

LEZ alert!
Ma eagle eyes are on u

My own is zenith bank, nd its nt on d list

Dimples192:
We lie to protect men for example we fake an orgasm to make them feel good

God wil not forgive u givin sm1 false hope

Signs

She might not be doin all dis ur signs, buh she cheat pass student wa no read for exams

Girls pretending since 1800BC

Tel dm ma broda

We're is dis geh Amaka have u seen it

Lol...10 seconds in bed, na fowl ni ??

Apply fast.....

Mods do the needful

GboyegaD:
You just sat on your computer to type whatever it is that comes to your mind. You either go interview him or you get someone to rather than insisting.

If it takes me a whole day to sit on my computer to try and let u knw dat GEJ is d best ting dat has ever happened to nigeria' so be it.

Shun dictatorship

Vote democracy

LagosBoi2:
Jonathan is a failed politician and a failed president...OBJ is wise enough to realize that...He is wise enough to distance himself from GEJ....

Other's supporting him are on his payroll

The funniest aspect of dis drama is dat does sayin der wan to change nigeria, are not hearin d word change for d first time, why didn't der change wen der had d opportunity??

Obasanjo is a failed president, Buhari a specialist in failure

Just few days ago, Obasanjo endorsed General Buhari as the man to deliver this nation. I was personally shocked, when I heard the
news. This is because, I was expecting Baba to stay at the touch line, and leave Nigerians to study his body language. But the
masquerade could not control his dance in the public market.
Hence he mistakenly flogged his own mother who is also a trader in the market. Nigerians, I am left with no option than to tell us
that, these ex-generals and their boys are up to something. The issue at hand is not all about the presidential seat. But rather, the
national cake (oil blocks). Less I forget, is it not the same Obasanjo who woke up and hand picked his puppet 2011, who
eventually grew like Joseph the messiah of Egypt? Is it not the
same Obj that told us 2011, that General Buhari is too old to rule
this country? Is it not the same Obj that told us Buhari is a
dictator? Somebody should have a rethink like me. We must
understand the preacher's language before decoding his message.
If Obj can take a swift and prefer General Buhari to Jonathan, a
puppet he dedicated his energy and resources to win 2011
election, then as an average Nigerian, we should have a rethink
and ask our leaders what is so special in Aso Rock. If leadership is
to serve the people, why is it that,the ex-generals finally gang up
against their new recruit on account of change? If we're to outline
the sins of Mr.President, are the ex- generals not guilty of such
sins? One may ask why is OP taking a swift? Everybody
wants change. But I am astonished the way and manner these ex-
general joined the train of change. Is it that, this is the first time
they heard the word change? If NO, why did they not change this
country when they were given opportunity? Why advocating for
change now when the puppet body language shows he Will not
renew their oil blocks licence? Why advocating for change now,
when the puppet purchased equipment to monitor and reduce
vandalism? Why advocating for change now, when the strong
headed puppet wiped out their ghost names from the civil service
pay roll? Why advocating for change now, when the puppet sacked
your boys as corrupt ministers? Why advocating for change now,
when the puppet refused to dump Sambo for another puppet? Why
advocating for change when he refused to kill Nigerians
indiscriminatel y. But rather he is exploiting all means of dialogue.
Unlike your Odi brutal killings and destruction. Why advocating for
change now, when the puppet refused to twist governors hands
with EFCC to pave his way like you did? Why advocating for
change now, when at 72 years, you still tell your children of
50years they are the leaders of tomorrow? Why advocating for
change now, when the puppet refused to give you the fertilizer
deal? Why advocating for change now, when the puppet refused to
jail your enemies? Why advocating for change now, when the
puppet refused to rig election for your daughter? Why advocating
for change now, when in your time railways were not working?
Why advocating for change, when in your time, our judiciary could
not delivered a fair judgement in favour of oppositions?
Baba,Nigerians are fed up of you sitting in Otta, deciding their
future. We want to decide our destiny with the help of God. We
want to practice true democracy by using our votes to decide our
future. Let the good works or antecedents of our leaders speak
volume for them. Just after the presidential chat with Mr.President,
we discovered that, you, your colleagues and errant boys, are
spreading false informations to pave your way to aso rock. Lastly,
I challenge you Baba, # Tinubu, # atiku and others to tell Nigerians
you don't have oil blocks or you Generals are not fighting the last
battle to protect your oil blocks. They won't come out and speak
my brothers and sisters. They want us to believe they are fighting
for us. When they have their own local refineries at their
backyards. R..I.P Fela: Animals wan dash me my human right.SMH

He lives each day trying to please his woman, he may have other girls but he places no one above her, his wish, above all things is peace, a month, a week, or even a day without her ‘nags’. He keeps up with her PMS secretly praying for her to be fine.

When she cries for no reason, he yells at her, not out of hatred but so she’d learn to be strong in case he is not around. He keeps his phone away just so she’d not be sad and he can’t really figure why she is always on the lookout for it. He tries to remember all relevant dates but since its more than one, he gets confused, in order not to mess it up with a mistake, he’ll rather be quiet about it all.

The things she expects of him, the ones she sees on tv are not just his ways, if he tries to do them, he’ll most likely look like a fool, but he loves her in his own way, he honestly wishes she could see. While she’s asleep, he opens his eyes, fixes his gaze on her and he’s happy to have found such a pretty woman, but just as she stirs he looks away, like he never noticed her. She is his love, she is his life and he wish he could go to the roof top to say it but the words would not just come.

He provides for her, protects and honors his woman, he is quiet while she’s there but turns to a roaring lion fighting for her once she leaves. He is constantly wishing he could rip open his heart and show her so she will see that the other girls, the phone calls; the messages don’t take her place. They are just bad habits which he needs her cooperation to overcome.

He really wants to propose and get married to her but he doesn’t want her to push him just yet. He has his fears too, fear of broken home, fear of being tagged a failure at marriage, fear of not being the father he is expected to be. His whole world revolves around her, but in a rather queer way, different from what is written in those books.

And then, despite all her nagging, screaming, trailing and monitoring him, he’s most likely prepared to stay with her and not divorce her, because if not for any other reason, she is the mother of his kids.

Have you met him yet? He is the typical Nigerian guy. The one we all grumble about yet can’t live without.

chimerase2:
wen u dn calll me bad boi still cum de ask me

lol...you be chairman ooooo

chimerase2:
As for me de only valentine I will give to ma babe is something dat is built within me

Badt guy, wetin go be dat thing??

How can a girl send you boxers & expect a Q10?
A tie and expect Brazilian hair?
Singlet and expect iPad?
Cuff-links and expect iPhone 6? Or nothing at all & expect an
expensive dinner at SFC Fastfood? ...Well, the National
Association of Nigerian Boyfriends (NABNB-) says it
should be trade by barter this Valentine Oooh - Singlet
should be exchanged with a Bra.-If she gives you roll-
on, buy her "Vaseline". -She gives you cufflinks; give
her rubber band to tie her natural hair. -If she shows
up at your door empty- handed, put CRBC or AIT for
her to watch. Don't let her watch your subscribed cable
(no free thing). - If she asks for an expensive dinner,
take her to an expensive night vigil. MFM or CAC to be
precise.-She gives you a flower; you give her yellow bush....

Daz'All!!Compliments!!

Truckpusher:
What makes this a brain teaser?
And who brought this trash to the fp?

I could bet my life dat u peeped the answer frm the comments

OLODO

hapi4eva:
and you call this brain teaser? you must be very dull...if dis can tease ur brain den u must be brainless

Photocopy machine wan folo comment