₦airaland Forum

Ummmm

Ummmm


But all did money no show for Im body na

Oya na finish dz one na

Abi .......

aliyuabbaashiru:
GOOD EVENING Ma. Please are you PATIENCE JONATHAN our "FIRST LADY? You sound like her and your username also suggests that...

Good evening Sir

I think you r sick

N u need serious medical attention
Biko stay healthy

Ummmmm

Story

Diz man should pls relax n stay healthy ooo


2015 election dey cum ooo


APC !!!!!
CHANGE!!!!!

Ummmm

U felt sumtin inside u



Anyway it is well

michaelwestern:
cute baby. what a pity, if only she attends a church where .....

Attends a church where?


My daughter will be n will always be a celestian

I can't watch porn with my husby O


I won't be comfortable sef

Ummmm

Ummm

See dem pastor stomach


Pastors no dey fast again na member of d church dey fast



Nigeria churches umm
Pastor dey fat,members dey slim since 1900BC

Chai!!!!!






I comment my reserve

Ummmm


Mind ur business sir


Cum February 14

Follow ur heart n vote wisely


If u continue to ask questions from now till 2019 u can never understand


God bless Nigeria






APC!!!!!


CHANGE!!!!

Wow diz is serious


No matter what my husband may have done to me or he's doing to me I will NEVER place a curse on him.


If not for God sake but for d children


Mr OP, I think it is time for u to go into praying n fasting for ur wife (like dey use to advice if d case was from a woman )



It is well

Who we are?
We are the Space Bookers Association of Nairaland.
What do we do?
We justle for space on the FrontPage(FP) even though we may not have meaningful contributions to the post.
How do we do it?
i. We download the Nairaland mobile app to get updates on new FP topics.
ii. We troll the forum for potential FP posts.
Why do we do this?
We love to have our monicker on the FP and probably get 'likes' to register our existence in the forum.

Where do we meet?
We meet on every frontpage 'FP' material and sometimes on any post that has the potential of making it to the FP; here, we register our presence with,
"in case"
"I was here"
"I'll come back when this makes FP" or "still sleeping, wake me when this makes FP"
and "I smell FP."

Is this your main job?
No! Once we get the update, we leave everything else to "bookspace" and later put it up for sale
Have you sold any of the spaces you've booked?
No data shows that sir but some people do negotiate, they quote you for price of the "land"

Is it possible to sell a space on NL?
Wait! Lemme as Ifa.
What'z the craze for FP, are you getting paid for making comments on the frontpage?
Yes! Lending a voice or just making up the numbers on FP is more than enough

Can you describe your members?
Sure! Why not. By their fruits...
1. The "ok" group- no matter how serious the matter is, their comment is always "ok". Some quote the whole post to comment "ok" at the end.
2. The consonants group- they use "q", "k", "jjj" most of these people later modify with meaningful comments, or jokes.

3. Those who make comments before reading. "Lemme book space first"
4. Lazy folks- these ones don't read long posts but usually ask people to summarize for them.

5. The weed smokers- they ask the OP what s/he smokes "OP, na cowdung u smoke? abeg gimme small make I high" or "obviously d OP is on cheap drugs" "U smoke wet weed?"

6. The 'rocks your boat' crew. They'd say, "whatever floats your goat/boat" as the case may be.

7. Issorait guys
8. Pinshures or adonbilivit
9. Ignorant ones- "Please what is an Ini Edo, we don't know anything like that here. I studied in France" "Who is Wizkid, is he the son of WizKhalifa?
10. People asking for SAUCE(source)

11. Smiley space bookers they book space with smileys sometimes irrelevant ones.
12. The searchers- "I'm still searching for the joke." "what is this one saying?" "Wait!, lemme ask Ifa"
i. Omawumi's descendants: "if u ask me, na who I go ask?"

13. The unconcerned: "story for the gods" "I'm I meant to comment on this?" "Tell them" "Aah shoki" "Kermit peeps"
14. GEJ till infinity folks.
POST: Davido buys a new pair of boxers.
COMMENT: "GEJ is working"

15. 3D viewers- they spread mats and put on their 3D cinema glasses.
16. I'm here to read the comments.
17. Landlords- Proud 'land' owners and they warn people to steer clear of their 'property'
18. FTC, STC, TTC and people who missed it by whiskers. They'd be like, "I will soon get there"

I'm not expected to know all nah but the following are gradually going into oblivion:

19. Official derailers
i. People who don't have chargers. "abeg who get pin mouth charger?
ii. People who want to charge their mobile phones. "shey light dey ur side, my fone don nearly die"
iii. People who want to soak garri
iv. Traffic officers: "Oga' face front" "Park well jhor"

20. ETT warrios to them, every news strip is a sign of End Time Things.
.......................just like kermit...



Disclaimer: I stole it ni oooo

Better

bukkialso:
89:49:57:05:66:44:90

57BK : 89BK

57BK : 49BK

PERM@15NAIRA EACH

TWO SURE
@80NAIRA EACH

Albubarika

08141735594

I no win o

Anyway dirz always a first time sha

bukkialso:
89:49:57:05:66:44:90

57BK : 89BK

57BK : 49BK

PERM@15NAIRA EACH

TWO SURE
@80NAIRA EACH

Albubarika

08141735594

I played it for d first time in my life


I promise to appreciate sir

Am new here pls, me self wan dey play diz bans ijebu pls I need a teacher


I promise to settle no matter how small


Pls tutorial ooo

Thank God o

Ask Onila

Na she sabi dem

So why return dir


Let d Our Man do ur job for u


SAI BUHARI

APC!!!!!


CHANGE!!!!!!!!

Ummmm



Very soon u go contest for chairman of ya village

Ummmm it is well

SeunEatsGARRI:
Cow dung!
Fianfitegbiloma... Obori

Is dat all u got

Want to apply for a visiting visa with my 1 year old daughter, am a business woman ...pls Hw do I go abt it

SeunEatsGARRI:
Fowl yansh!

U r just an illiterate!!!!!
Nairaland ti da iru mo shapa





Fullish

Na wa ooo

itstpia1:
That girl in the last picture, I dey suspect am o.

She luk like d guy's wife