1) Investigate, and if possible, choose an accountant before you start your business.

2) Make sure your accountant is fully qualified, for example as a certified or chartered accountant. Most likely, these qualifications will be displayed on any promotional material or the company's website, otherwise make sure you ask.

3) It is essential that your accountant works with small business clients. If your business generates a large number of transactions (for example, an online shopping service), make sure the accountant has experience with dealing with companies in your sector if possible.

4) How much does the accountant charge? Is there a fixed annual or monthly fee to complete all business tax requirements, or do hourly fees apply? Compare the fees of several firms.

5) When you first meet a prospective accountant, you will know soon enough if you see eye-to-eye. It is important to develop a good relationship and know that your finances are being handled by someone you trust. You should contact at least 3 accountants and find out which one best meets your requirements.

6) What other services does the accountant provide - can they complete your self assessment returns, do they provide business advice or further information to help grown your business.

7) As a small business, we find that the best accountants are also likely to be smaller in size. They will understand what it's like running a small operation and will have the resources and time you require to fun your finances properly.

Ask to speak to existing clients before signing up. A decent accountancy firm should be happy to arrange this.

9) Make sure your accountant keeps in touch with your business - not just at year end! If you feel your current accountant no longer meets your requirements for whatever reason, get a new one!

10) If at some stage you decide to sell your business, you will need a good accountant more than ever to minimise any tax liabilities payable on the sale

1. The first thing to do is to get a computer. If you've already got a computer, skip this bit. To get a FREE computer, get someone's hand-me-down. People are often very silly about upgrading their computer and will sometimes throw out a perfectly good computer just because it's no longer The Latest Thing. Even a very old computer is ok for the Internet, as the speed isn't limited by the computer power but by the phone line! So, never mind 2.2GHz, even a Pentium75, or a P60, is plenty fast enough to be on the Internet.

2. If you've got a phone and you don't mind making a few local-rate calls, skip this next bit. However, if you want to absolutely stick by the letter of the wording and insist the phone calls are free, you'll have to hook up with an internetless neighbour who will barter phone call usage for favours such as Internet usage! Either way, the use of Charge Advice will help to determine how many pence the calls have cost and so dispel the idea that it's costing anything significant.

3. Get sources of free technical advice. Get to know computer experts who you can ask techie questions. This will help you avoid having to phone premium-rate technical lines!

4. Get a dial-up free. According to 123-reg, Host Europe are doing a free dial-up service on 0845 604 4026. This costs local rate which is 1p / minute after 6pm and at weekends.

5. Get a free webspace. Use your dial-up to access the Internet from your computer. My current recommendation is Tiscali, but there are others at my ISPs Status Page. Webspaces can generally be got FREE, though sometimes they have to be "enabled" (which is not difficult). When getting a webspace, make sure it is WITHOUT ADVERTS. Those I've chosen to have listed at my ISPs Status Page do not have adverts, because if I am having adverts on my site I want it to be MYSELF making the money, not my ISP!

(also note that your free webspace also comes with free e-mail and free dial-up, but you've needed a dial up to get this far!)

(The ISPs Status Page features free webspaces AND the reasonably priced hosting by Web Impact. If you're interested, the extra 50p/week gives you some advantages such as better naming of pages for deep-linking, more space, server log availability etc. For reasonably-priced websites, see the write-up at www.zyra.me.uk)

6. Get a website. This is the content, the webstuff which is what you want to say, what you want to put on your website. You make this up yourself. It's the expression of your own ideas! However, to turn it into a website on the Internet it needs to be written as HTML. HTML (hyper-text markup language) is the nuts-and-bolts of website stuff. You can generate it using a website authoring tool of some sort. (some of these are free). But what I'd recommend is to generate it yourself using real HTML. This takes learning, but it is well worthwhile because your acquired skill will produce more efficient faster websites and be of use for years to come. Learn HTML! Also, because of the prices some people are silly enough to pay for websites, anyone who knows HTML need never be a pauper!

7. Upload your website. To do this, there are various programs available. Some of these are expireware but not all. Some are given away FREE. Various FTP programs are listed at the FTP Page. Also note that uploading is often a bit messy because some of the ISPs/hosts don't always give you the info. If that happens to you, don't phone the expensive technical support line; phone the ISP's freefone customer support line and point out that they should know the uploading parameters and should be able to tell you!

8. Get a free domain. This is the www name of your website. If you want to be .co.uk or .org.uk or .com etc, it costs money and I have some contacts that are very reasonably priced at my domains page, but as we're talking about FREE domains, you'll be interested to know that you can get a domain for no cost at all by visiting www.zyra.tk and acquiring your own .tk domain. Note: You can only do this if you have already got an e-mail address AND a page of webstuff to point to. If you have not yet got a page to point to, you are welcome to use a page I have created, the address of which is http://www.zyra.org.uk/holding.htm until you have got your own site uploaded.

9. Get free search-engine promotion. Visit my "submit your website" page, and choose some of the options that are FREE. AddMe is free. iNeedHits has a free option too. Also, if you want your website to have good search-engine ranking, don't just submit it all over the place, actually LINK it. Get loads of Reciprocal Links. See mine at recip.htm . The more your website links to other sites and the more websites you can get to link to you the better! Tell your friends. Persuade them to link to you, and in return you link to them. It also helps if all the pages in your site are well linked together. Another good way to get a site noticed is to get Zyra.org.uk to link to it. I'm generally quite amenable to such offers if they are fair.

10. Make money from your website. You can do this by affiliate programs. (what's that?). This is free too, although again it requires some work. Sign to to some affiliate marketing companies. This is not a way to get rich quick, but long-term it can be very profitable. The key to success is to be nice to everyone and not be so greedy as to put people off!

Extra notes: Protect yourself and your computer by being wise to various things at the Rogues Gallery and the Antivirus Page. There's other free advice at the page of ADVICE.

OK, that's it. How to get a free website! I'd be interested to hear how you get on with this. You can e-mail me. Also, I'd be interested to hear about the variations in the recipe so that the method can be extended to different places around the world. (The UK-specific bits are mainly the phone/ISP stuff).

GOOD LUCK!

How to Set Up and Run Your Own Business

I think it's important in life to be a success, and yet it is surprising how unambitious the career options proposed by most schools (and some universities) are. They assume that you want to get a job and be paid a regular wage, have a mortgage, retire at a particular age, etc, but without making all this sound too much like the song "Choose Life", it has to be said that you really can choose your future and you really don't have to do the normal expected thing.

What would be nice would be to make a fortune and become immensely rich. Looking at this aim in a practical sense, it soon becomes obvious that even if you get a well-paid job and work until you're 65 years old, you'll not really become truly rich. You don't get rich by working for someone else. A better plan is required. There are various ways of becoming rich: Winning the Lottery, but this requires luck. Being a STAR, but this requires star-quality and luck as well (more about this later). And then there's running your own business, which anyone with enough sense and determination can do. You don't need to be brilliantly clever, lucky, have star-quality, have an ancestry of entrepreneurs on both sides of the family, or be quite well-off to start with, although all these things help a bit. What really helps is getting a few things right, and now I'll go on to describe these things, in the general helpful hints and tips by Zyra style,

* The first myth to explode about running your own business, is the notion that to start any business requires a lot of money. This idea is believed by almost everyone, strange as it may seem. Whilst it is true that some types of business require an enormous initial outlay, most only require a very modest initial investment, and some require virtually no money at all to start them off! It is quite practical to start a business with no more money than you spend on a Saturday night and end up eventually becoming a multi-millionaire.

* Don't get me wrong about this - becoming rich by setting up your own company is not a get rich quick system. Running your own business is harder work and requires longer hours than having a 9-5 job. It's not an "easy option". The point is that you CAN become immensely rich, not that it's easy. However, if you hate being poor, the extra work required to become rich may be worthwhile.

* The essence of running your own business with success is a matter of good planning. It is a strategic planning philosophy which works best, as seen in the Direct Drive idea. You plan what you're going to do, work out what kinds of things might go wrong, and test the ideas out to see what's practical. If you play chess, apply that chess-playing logic to life and money, and you are likely to be a success.

* Determination is important. It's best to have an attitude of being persistent in working on your business. You have to keep on at it even though it's hard work and doesn't have any immediate reward.

* Accounting. It's not boring. There are two types: Tax accounting and Admin accounting. Tax accounting is done as follows: Collect all important-looking financial paperwork and put it all into a large bag. Look after this carefully and give it to your accountant. Admin accounting is something you do yourself, where you work out on the back of an envelope how much money you are getting in and how much money you are spending. Every part of your business has to make sense financially. So, if you're manufacturing something, it has to sell for more than the cost of all the parts (sounds silly, but I have seen businesses where this was not so!).

* This idea of "Admin accounting" is important and extends into having a knowledge of the way money works. If you have a cash register/till with £1000 in it, a person with no capitalist sense may tell you that you have made £1000. You've got to know this is not true. Your takings might be £1000, but if your stock cost you £800, then you've only "made" £200. Minus your overheads.

* Overheads are the cost of running a business, such things as electricity, property maintenance, insurance, fuel, the type of things that still cost money regardless of how much business is going on. Watch out for overheads very carefully. Keep them to a minimum if possible. I've seen companies that take in huge amounts of money and yet still go broke because their overheads are too big. But this is no secret threat that can creep up and bite you. You can quantify overheads and work out exactly how much money your company needs to make to cover them.

* Open a bank account but try to avoid paying "business rates" for it. Most banks have some kind of special offer on free banking with a current account. You don't need to pay for the privilege of paying cheques in, or any kind of monthly fee generally. If you can't find a bank account that's free, run your business from a building society account!

* Avoid PARTNERSHIPS. Especially with your friends! If you decide you must have a business relationship with someone, make sure it's all written down and everyone knows exactly what they are supposed to do.

* Limited liability. Whilst it's tempting to be a LTD company, this is often overrated and misunderstood. The advantages and disadvantages of being Limited are mainly not to do with the snazziness of the company but are to do with investor insurance and formal management. It's often easier and less expensive to be a sole trader. In most capitalist countries, a person can declare themselves to be a company (not limited) just by stating the fact, and there is no official registration required. This is very good for business, as companies can be created ad-lib by would-be entrepreneurs and can succeed or fail on their own merits.

* There are many types of business you can set up. I have run many businesses (with greater or lesser success) since I left university in 1982. My current business makes more money than if I had a well-paid normal job, and it is THIS WEBSITE www.zyra.org.uk , and I can go on and tell you about affiliate marketing if you like, but you'll probably have some entirely different brilliant idea for a business!

* Your own website. Whether you're an Internet business or not, it's good to have your own website! This does not have to be expensive. See How to Get a Free Website. All web design companies and affiliate marketing companies have their own websites, but most fishmongers and windowcleaners don't usually have. However, having a website is good for business. Customers are often impressed to see "www." on the company's "premises". Also see how to choose a domain. (Don't be caught out by cybersquatters or fooled by rogues phoning in and claiming to be able to sell you your domain! Buy it yourself, first!)

And now here are some things to watch out for, potential threats to a company which can be seen in advance if you know about them:

* Beware of CREDIT. Obviously beware of borrowing too much money from the bank and paying loads of interest. But also beware of extending credit to your customers. If you do, some of them will not pay up, and the rest will have to subsidise them! It's better to be CASH ONLY and IN ADVANCE. This will allow you to sleep better, will be cheaper for your customers, and will not let bad payers damage your business! Remember: Bad payers come in many disguises. They may look reputable, look rich, and seem honest, but can bounce cheques on you and make lame excuses. Don't let them get away with it!

* When signing anything, always read all of it. If there's too much smallprint it's better to refuse to sign it than to sign it without reading it.

* Don't have "all your eggs in one basket". If you're a supplier, don't let your business become DEPENDENT on one customer. A well-balanced company should be able to survive the loss of any one or two customers and still survive. The problem is especially bad where a small company is a supplier to a big supermarket and sells 80% of their produce to the supermarket. It has been known for the customer to eat the company whole by withdrawing the deal, making the company go broke, and then buying the company up for next-to-nothing at the liquidation sale. To avoid this, always have enough lifeboats, such that even if the worst happened, you will not be lost without trace.

* Also, if you have a small shop, be on good terms with other small shops as much as possible but beware of the habits of some of the larger rivals. Some of the more disreputable places have been known to nobble the suppliers, making dodgy exclusivist deals to try to cut out the small shops. For that reason it's best to suss out the enemy before they suss you out. Wherever possible it's best to have many different suppliers who are all in healthy competition with each other, and to be in-the-know with the friendlies, who all know who the worst offender is. Some small towns live under economic oppression and poverty because of the unreasonable business behaviour of a few vested interests who "own the town".

* Another threat to a business which has to be watched out for is to do with commercial rent. If you rent a building, be very careful and be on your guard for this. Some landlords have a habit of waiting for a business to be a success and then doubling the rent. To avoid this, make sure the smallprint is not too bad, and also have options open to move to different premises if the problem occurs.

* Don't work too hard, have no fun, and catch the dreaded diabetes. Also, if you run a small business, make sure that even if you were to suffer from a sudden attack of bad health, your business will not be bankrupted. Self-employed people have no statutory sick pay or other compassionate safety nets. Therefore it's best to make provision to have some kind of understudy and living will!

To sum it up:

If you have a desire to run your own business, then you should do it! However, plan what you're doing well and have good strategy worked out in advance. if you've got a good idea, give it a try. Don't risk more money than you can afford to lose, and don't be put off by problems that occur. Listen to different people's good advice and then make your own mind up about whether they are right or not. In principle anyone who can think logically and has some determination about them can run their own business, and some of them will make money. I wish you well with it!

Amen

Migines
you are very smart,as soon as i post you have read and post rely.your girl dont need to end her leter with 'please try to rely as soon as possible'
you are my guy

Migines
you are very smart,as soon as i post you have read and post rely.your girl dont need to end her leter with 'please try to rely as soon as possible'

Migines
you are very smart,as soon as i post you have read and post rely.your girl dont need to end her leter with 'please try to rely as soon as possible'

Migines
you are very smart,as soon as i post you have read and post rely.your girl dont need to end her leter with 'please try to rely as soon as possible'

Holidays
An atheist complained to a friend, "Christians have their special holidays, such as Christmas and Easter. And Jews celebrate their holidays, such as Passover and Yom Kippur. Muslims have their holidays, too."

"Every religion has holidays to celebrate. But we atheists," he said, "have no recognized national holiday. It's an unfair discrimination"

His friend replied, "Well, why don't you celebrate April 1st?"

Think About It
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.

- It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

- Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

- It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

- If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

- If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.

- If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again; it was probably worth it.

- Some days you are the bug, some days you are the windshield.

- If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

- Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.

- To the world you might be one person, but to one person you might be the world.

- Going to church does not make you a Christian anymore than going to McDonald's makes you a hamburger.

- A coincidence is when God performs a miracle, and decides to remain anonymous.

- Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side.

- Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep.

- Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.

- Following the path of least resistance is what makes rivers and men crooked.

- Life is 10% of what happens to you, and 90% of how you respond to it.

Wrapping Presents with a Cat
1. Clear large space on table for wrapping present.

2. Go to closet and collect bag in which present is contained, and shut door.

3. Open door and remove cat from closet.

4. Go to cupboard and retrieve rolls of wrapping paper.

5. Go back and remove cat from cupboard.

6. Go to drawer, and collect transparent sticky tape, ribbons, scissors, labels, etc. . .

7. Lay out presents and wrapping materials on table, to enable wrapping strategy to be formed.

8. Go back to drawer to get string, remove cat that has been in the drawer since last visit and collect string.

9. Remove present from bag.

10. Remove cat from bag.

11. Open box to check present, remove cat from box, replace present.

12. Lay out paper to enable cutting to size.

13. Try and smooth out paper, realize cat is underneath and remove cat.

14. Cut the paper to size, keeping the cutting line straight.

15. Throw away first sheet as cat chased the scissors, and tore the paper.

16. Cut second sheet of paper to size - by putting cat in the bag the present came in.

17. Place present on paper.

18. Lift up edges of paper to seal in present. Wonder why edges don't reach. Realize cat is between present and paper. Remove cat.

19. Place object on paper, to hold in place while tearing transparent sticky tape.

20. Spend 20 minutes carefully trying to remove transparent sticky tape from cat with pair of nail scissors.

21. Seal paper with sticky tape, making corners as neat as possible.

22. Look for roll of ribbon. Chase cat down hall in order to retrieve ribbon.

23. Try to wrap present with ribbon in a two-directional turn.

24. Re-roll ribbon and remove paper, which is now torn due to cat's enthusiastic ribbon chase.

25. Repeat steps 17-24 until you reach last sheet of paper.

26. Decide to skip steps 17-21 in order to save time and reduce risk of losing last sheet of paper. Retrieve old cardboard box that is the right size for sheet of paper.

27. Put present in box, and tie down with string.

28. Remove string, open box and remove cat.

29. Put all packing materials in bag with present and head for locked room.

30. Once inside lockable room, lock door and start to relay out paper and materials.

31. Remove cat from box, unlock door, put cat outside door, close and relock.

32. Repeat previous step as often as is necessary (until you can hear cat from outside door)

33. Lay out last sheet of paper. (This will be difficult in the small area of the toilet, but do your best)

34. Discover cat has already torn paper. Unlock door go out and hunt through various cupboards, looking for sheet of last year's paper. Remember that you haven't got any left because cat helped with this last year as well.

35. Return to lockable room, lock door, and sit on toilet and try to make torn sheet of paper look presentable.

36. Seal box, wrap with paper and repair by very carefully sealing with sticky tape. Tie up with ribbon and decorate with bows to hide worst areas.

37. Label. Sit back and admire your handiwork, congratulate yourself on completing a difficult job.

38. Unlock door, and go to kitchen to make drink and feed cat.

39. Spend 15 minutes looking for cat until coming to obvious conclusion.

40. Unwrap present, untie box and remove cat.

41. Go to store and buy a gift bag.

A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck passed too close and completely tore off the door on the driver's side. The lawyer immediately grabbed his cell phone, dialed 911, and within minutes a policeman pulled up.

Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically. His Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it.

When the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief. "I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."

"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.

The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."

"My God!" screamed the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex?"

I rear-ended another car this morning. I tell you, I knew right then and there that it was going to be a really bad day!

The driver got out of the other car, and wouldn't you know it, he was a DWARF!

He looked up at me and said " Hey buddy, I am NOT Happy!"

So I said, "Well then, which dwarf ARE you?"

And that's how the fight started

A young executive was leaving the office at 6 p.m. when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.

"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?"

"Certainly," said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.

"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO, as his paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy."

Camping Tips
- Get even with a bear who raided your food bag by kicking his favorite stump apart and eating all the ants.

- A hot rock placed in your sleeping bag will keep your feet warm. A hot enchilada works almost as well, but the cheese sticks between your toes.

- The best backpacks are named for national parks or mountain ranges. Steer clear of those named for landfills.

- When camping, always wear a long-sleeved shirt. It gives you something to wipe your nose on.

- Take this simple test to see if you qualify for solo camping. Shine a flashlight into one ear. If the beam shines out the other ear, do not go into the woods alone.

- A two-man pup tent does not include two men or a pup.

- A potato baked in the coals for one hour makes an excellent side dish. A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck.

- In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic waistband of your underwear.

Rossi was the manager of an upscale men's wear store in a wealthy section of town and was interviewing Abe for the recently advertised salesman role.

Rossi looks at Abe's resume and notices that Abe has never worked in retail before.

Rossi says to Abe, "What chutzpah, if you don't mind me saying. For someone with no retail experience, you are certainly asking for a high salary."

"Well I suppose I am," Abe replies, "but you must understand that the work is so much harder when you don't know what you're doing."

A lawyer's wife dies. At the cemetery, people are appalled to see that the tombstone reads, “Here lies Phyllis, wife of Murray, L.L.D., Wills, Divorce, Malpractice.”

Suddenly, Murray bursts into tears. His brother says, “You should cry, pulling a stunt like this!”

Through his tears, Murray croaks, “You don't understand! They left out the phone number!”

The story runs that in olden times there was nothing to eat, so Eze Nri (King of Nri) considered what should be done to remedy the defect. He took the drastic course of killing his eldest son, cutting the body into small pieces and burying them. His daughter met a similar fate. Strange to say, five months later, yam tendrils (me ji) were observed to be growing at the very places where the dismembered parts of the body had been enplaned. In a similar fashion, ede (koko-yam) began to grow where the remains of the daughter had been buried. After six months, the Eze Nri dug up fine large yams from his son’s grave and Ede from the place where he had buried his daughter. He cooked both and found them sweet.

At this time, the king was unable to rest or sleep during the day. On one occasion, one of the children of the village came along in search of fire. Eze Nri gave a piece of cooked yam to the child who ate it, went home and promptly fell asleep. The child’s people were surprised and, when he awoke, asked him to relate to them what had happened. He replied that he did not know what it was that Eze Nri had given him to eat. So the process was repeated and it happened again as at the first instance. Then the people asked for yam and Ede. The king demanded a great price before he handed out supplies, and gave instructions on how to plant the yam. From that time, yam and ede appeared throughout the nation.

The above is our legend as related in Nri. In general, the origin of yam is traced to wild species found in the bush. Through the generations, they have been collected, and by cultivation improved, until they are as we have them today. The most common explanation of its presence is that yam was introduced by the Portuguese to Nigeria during the slave trading days.

Yam in the past and during my younger days was the Igbos favorite food. It stands to him as potato does to the typical Irishman. A shortage of yam supply is a case of genuine distress. For no substitute gives the same sense of satisfaction. This preference for yam and the time and labor necessary for its production are some reasons why yam is a very important Igbo food. It was the most serious occupation for the Igbos. Conditions have changed in recent years and the more sophisticated people are not now so entirely dependent upon it as their fathers did.

There are many varieties of yam tubers; they differ in size, appearance and flavor. The same soil does not suit the growing of all varieties. I will spare you the trouble of discussing the method of planting and the enormous time and labour it takes to plant yams. The code of laws that formerly operated in connection with yam planting was very stringent. Infringement of the laws led to serious results and not infrequently to blood shed. It was a capital offence to rob a farm of its yams whether they were newly set seed or the mature root. In spite of the danger attendant upon the deed, farms were sometimes raided. When the operations in the field are at an end, a regular time of the feasting follows, beginning with the Ịwa-ji (breaking of the new yam). Between whiles, the men are engaged in trying the farms, one by one, to open upright frames in such a manner that wind and sun may have free access to them. Yams rot very quickly if left lying on the ground. The yam stacks (Ọba) stands in a secluded part of the compound and is penned off with a stout fence and the entrance locked.

Yams will not thrive unless properly tended. Not only must yams be kept free from weeds; sticks must also support them. The tendrils run to several feet in length and will deteriorate unless they can climb. The main crop of yams grown on higher grounds is not harvested until later in the year round about the end of October and November.

Until the last few years it might be legitimately affirmed that the life of the people was bound up with the yam supply. Fore generations it was the stale food of the Igbos. From an agricultural point of view, the yam is a very extravagant vegetable to grow. Each tuber requires a full square yard of land, which in itself is a big demand. For seven or eight months of the year regular attention must be given to its care absorbing much time and labor. The farm is a family and wages do not enter into the calculations nor does time count to the Igbo family. It is doubtful foreigners can teach the Igbos much in respect of yam growing.

“ỊWA JI” is observed as a public function on certain appointed days of the year. It is the feast of new yam; the breaking of the yam, harvest is followed by thanksgiving. An offering is offered and the people pray for renewed life as they eat the new yam. An offering is made to the spirits of the field with special reference to the presiding deity of the yam crop. In the olden days, fouls offered as sacrifice must be carried to the farm and slain there, with the blood being sprinkled on the farm. When the ceremony is completed, everything is taken home; the yams are laid up before the “Alụsị” (deity) together with all the farming implements, while the fowls are eaten at the subsequent feast. The whole community shares in this harvest and thanksgiving called “Afịa-ji Ọkụ”. The meaning and significance of the name is worth explaining. The idea behind “Afịa-ji Ọkụ” seems to indicate exertion, industry, to strive after, hence to trade; “ji”, to lay hold of and “Ọkụ” riches. Thus, the full meaning is: “Industry or trade brings wealth.” In those days, yam largely constituted wealth.

The feast is held once a year and is observed at a sacred spot. It is held in the sixth month after planting and in some parts is observed on an Nkwọ day only. It is held when the first new yams are available. The seed of which were planted in the first month of the year, in order to be ready in time for the ceremony, whereas the main crops is planted in the second month.

In the ceremony blessing is sought of the yam spirit. Kola nut is produced and standing in front of the “Alụsị” the petitioner appeals: “Eat this kola and help the yam in the small farms that, if the rain be too much, they may not drown , and if the rain be too strong, he may not cause them to whither.”

The sacrificial offering varies little in different localities. The gift may consist of kola nut and a fowl, together with “ogilisi” and new yams, the last being boiled. Sometimes, thick skin together with kola nut and young palm leaves are offered. The petitioner says, “See this fowl which I have brought to you!” Afịa-ji Ọkụ na ọkụkụ m’wetalụ kam’nye i.” The throat of the fowl is slit and the blood sprinkled. The carcass is given to the children wherewith to make soup. He the petitioner goes on to say, “If I plant yam as small as this, when I dig it up, may it be so long as this, indicating with his hands and arms the sizes he has in mind. He prays that fever may not trouble him or his people and that all things may prosper in his hand.

That night, a feast is held of which men only partake, as they are responsible for the growing of the yam. In any case, women do not eat food that has been offered to a spirit. A month after, the people begin to dig up their yams.

Nervous Flyer
I am a very nervous flyer. During a trip from California to Indiana, it didn't help that my connecting flight from Denver was delayed twice because of mechanical problems. Then, after we were aloft, I noticed the lights began flickering. I mentioned this to a flight attendant.

"I'll take care of it," she said. Moments later the lights went out. Clearly she'd solved the problem by turning off the lights.

A passenger across the aisle who had been listening leaned over and said, "Whatever you do, please don't ask about the engines."

Many people are unaware that Frank Sinatra was an ecologist.

Once, he found out that the herds of animals in Africa were being forced off their native lands into game reserves where they were more apt to be eaten by their natural enemies due to the crowded conditions.

These animals would congregate around lakes and other bodies of water, but had nowhere to run if they were attacked by their foes. This resulted in abnormal losses in the herds.

Frank, upon finding out about this, donated a LOT of money to trying to find out where there may be some open land to put the animals so they wouldn't be so crowded.

Frank's idea was to go to the watering holes and load the animals on large barges and take them to other lands and then set them free.

In order to accomplish this, he had to finance his work through a best-selling song about it.

We've all heard the song before.

It starts out, "Start spreading the Gnus, "

The title of the song was, of course, "New Ark, New Ark."

A businessman was in a great deal of trouble. His business was failing, he had put everything he had into the business, he owed everybody-- it was so bad he was even contemplating suicide. As a last resort he went to a priest and poured out his story of tears and woe.

When he had finished, the priest said, "Here's what I want you to do: Put a beach chair and your Bible in your car and drive down to the beach. Take the beach chair and the Bible to the water's edge, sit down in the beach chair, and put the Bible in your lap. Open the Bible; the wind will rifle the pages, but finally the open Bible will come to rest on a page. Look down at the page and read the first thing you see. That will be your answer, that will tell you what to do."

A year later the businessman went back to the priest and brought his wife and children with him. The man was in a new custom-tailored suit, his wife in a mink coat, the children shining. The businessman pulled an envelope stuffed with money out of his pocket, gave it to the priest as a donation in thanks for his advice.

The priest recognized the benefactor, and was curious. "You did as I suggested?" he asked.

"Absolutely," replied the businessman.

"You went to the beach?"

"Absolutely."

"You sat in a beach chair with the Bible in your lap?"

"Absolutely."

"You let the pages rifle until they stopped?"

"Absolutely."

"And what were the first words you saw?"

"Chapter 11."

This discovery, no doubt, has proven that the conventional method of pre-recruitment selection for tests and interviews used by many companies in Nigeria are usually time consuming, expensive and difficult to manage.

In this interview, Mr. Osho Abiodun, managing director of Jobsearch Nigeria Limited, speaks on the new dynamics of the company's e-recruitment platform. Excerpts:


COULD you please, tell us about Jobsearch Nigeria Limited?

Jobsearch Nigeria is an information and communication technology firm with a core interest in database solution technology. What we have done in our company is to develop a site called jobsearchnigeria.com. Jobsearch Nigeria.com is basically a database website, we developed as a platform between job-seekers and recruiters. As you know, the problem we have today in our society is unemployment. You see graduates that have left schools for about seven years, five or three years and they are still looking for jobs. Some of them that are working are just barely managing at one company or the other and at the same time if you look at the process of recruitment in Nigeria, you would discover that it is still very outdated. We have followed closely the conventional method of recruiting job seekers in Nigeria, a situation by which applicants Curriculum Vitae (CV) are sorted out manually.

We believe the method is obsolete, expensive, mind bugling and time consuming, considering the advancement in information and communication technology in the 21st century. Many applications sent by post in response to advertisements do not get to their destinations or get there later than intended. Job seekers spend lots of money, go to wrong places, exhaust their energy, abuse their bodies and health and in the process become psychologically and emotionally troubled.

How does it work?

Now, as a job seeker, all that you have to do is to buy our scratch card which is five hundred naira (N500) and has one year validity. When you buy our scratch card, containing 12 digits you just go to a cyber café, there is a pin number behind the card, you type in the pin number to your system which you log on to the site and it would give you the CV format. There is already a paraphrasing format, so when you log in, your pin number will give you a standard CV format which can aid you to fill in your information and after filling, you post or submit your information (CV) to www.jobsearch.nigeri.com data base.

But at the point of filling your information, the system would ask you very important questions. One, it would ask you to create your password and your user's name. The card like I said has one year validity and with unlimited access during which job seekers can update their CVs from time to time as the need arises. The moment you use the card, another person cannot use it. But with our new concept, you can remain on the platform for the next one year, so any time you want to update your CV, you can still go back to your platform and update it. So, when you submit your cv, that is the end of the task.

So, how do you get back to the job seeker?

Now, after seeing every information about an employer of labour, they can send e-mail to you, SMS or call you on phone. Some companies today now conduct their first and second stage interviews on phone before they can ask the job seekers to come to their office for the last stage. So, they see every information about you on site before they invite you for interview.

This access code we give to companies is free of charge and so far we have given it out to over one thousand companies in Nigeria. So, where we make our money is basically from the scratch cards which cost only N500 and we believe this amount is moderate enough that anybody can afford it because if one move from one place to another in search of job, as a job seeker, even in a day, you can spend much more than that. That again, is the beauty of it. So, your CV is well exposed and the cost of searching for job is reduced and also the hazard of moving from one city to another is removed and at the same time, you are linked to strong and potential companies. We are not talking about business centres here, rather we are talking about big corporations.

Relevant Links

West Africa
Economy, Business and Finance
ICT and Telecom
Industry and Infrastructure
Labour
Nigeria
Urban Issues and Habitation



As part of our re-launch campaign, we are kicking off with a motor ride campaign which would last for about sixty days to make sure that everybody is aware of the product because when it comes to the issue of technology, it is perfect. By the grace of God, we have our host in the UK and up time is 24 hours 99.9 per cent. So, for twenty four hours, you can't say after buying our scratch card, on getting to the website that you could not access it. There is nothing like that. We have a credible host company in the UK that is hosting our database and we are running on a dynamic server. But we believe as a job seeker, you should be computer literate, so our concept is so beautiful and very unique, particularly as our search engine is very dynamic in such a way that once you just put in your parameter, the system will download it within seconds and at the same time, adequate security measures are put in place to guard your password and other data.

Who are your target clients?

Our target people are actually corps members, (NYSC), numerous job seekers, both the unemployed and those who want a change of job. Because in Nigeria, until you are on your own, you need a job, because somebody may be counting on your experience to even employ you. Also those in the higher institutions, either universities or polytechnics equally need the card particularly those in their final years.

Although NIFOR has recorded significant achievements in oil palm research which would have sustained this country's pre~eminent position as the world's leading palm oil producer it is now well known that Nigeria lost its leading position because development in the oil palm industry did not keep pace with research and domestic demand. Up to the early 1960s, Nigeria was the foremost world producer and exporter of palm oil, her annual export averaging 162,000 tonnes (21% of the total world tr.:\de).In 1962, however, there was a sudden decline from 165,000 tonnes exported in 1961to about 118,000 t6nnes.~ This was thought to be associated with the decision of the Regional Marketing Boards to reduce the Ins pi to I of this relative decline, Nigeria was still top most of the world I tonne leading to a slight recovery of about 16,000 tonnes. producer price from N106/tonne to H82/tonnc. The 1962 price level was maintained up to 1964 when it was slightly incrcased to H84/palm oil export table. In 1965, this position was overtaken by f1alaysia with a tota~ export of about 180,000 tonnes against 152,000 tonnes for the same yc¥r. By 1976 Nigeria's role has been reversed from that of an exporter to that of a net importer~ . 1980 imports stood at 21,000 tonnes valued at N11.4 Million

if you depend on government,you will not go far in life

abelix:

shortman or whatever you are called please you just insulted me i guess you need to see what ever kks pranks caused this is a serious site if you must know not for kid .comprehend

@abelix
i went to youth convention my guy,so now am back.thank you for your wounderful contribution but i wish i can see your mother and probablely your father for not doing what they ought to do when you are small and now you are big

what is the subject requirement for reading law in high institution
do i need maths like in UME/JAMB

.