₦airaland Forum

[quote author=Efemena_xy]Dunno why you lot are laughing.
At least Dinachi's babe can stand on her own two feet without much support na [/quote]Na so you hate me reach...chai i don suffer today...abeg that one is too much for me....take am easy oh!

Woged2005: Why are we wasting time on something that's already decided? My Rev fr. once said u've to give someone options in order to help u make a choice. @OP has already made up her mind to have this guy or thing, at all cost despite all the warnings God is putting across to her that he's not hers.
@OP, I'll suggest u take his picture to one of the 'shrines' or 'red-cloth prayer houses' at Ogun, so they can force the guy to come back and marry u at all cost. Don't give up please, fight with the last sweat. Even if the guy is married to another woman, and the woman is heavily pregnant for him, please keep fighting for him to come back to u. Spend ur savings, cut off all ur friends who don't support u, quit ur work and travel to villa for him and never come back until he comes back to u. . I hope I'm ur friend now that I'm supporting u?
Nigerian girls and desperation to answer Mrs...! Mtcheeeew!
Sorry, I have to be harsh, but it appears u don't get it!

She is desperate to answer Mrs ...and you are are desperate for what? Leave her alone! Allow her to rediscover her love. You don't plan love it happens. Every love story is not the same. Every relationship has a history. let her be! All these Nairaland feminists and their advice sef. My dear they maybe jealous of you! Follow your heart. After discouraging you here, they cannot help you.

[quote author=Efemena_xy]You nor sabi interpret?
That lady is a chronic feminist and her message to Sir Dinachi is: C'mon baby, come to mama![/quote]If she is a chronic feminist then i think she will do better in your company!

kundi90: @Efemena_xy yes you might be correct. On the first thread, she wrote, "the guy spoils her silly" -- "Money things!". She misses the money more, I can now see clearly now.

My take is if she loves the guy she should go for him and talking about money how many of you ladies here will not love a rich husband. I hope you ladies are not jealous of her.....just saying!

jennykadry: Actually they are both online, ile and chilli I mean

Na the same person. Hand of Esau voice of Jacob

[quote author=Chillisauce][s]Madness
Dinachi go and take a shower and cool off you almost void brain [/quote[/s]]

Am also sure that you will accuse other worthy brilliant female posters like Ewuro, pure ohio and co who have torn your rumpled disheveled stinking feminist toga to shreds in this thread. Irritants like you have only one thing in common. They are a nuisance to themselves!

Chillisauce: This closet gay, why do you love my name so much. Chilisauce chillisauce....am I giving you nightmares

Now that we have ran off ileobatojo you now re appear as Chillisauce. Master of multiple monikers. Keep it up.

@ Kundi90 would you have said the same if roles are reversed. The truth is that love is worth fighting for even if you lose! People fight for money, fight for property , fight for all manner of nonsense but feminists will advice women not to fight for their love. I gave her my advice. She appears to love the guy and i understand that. You can't wish real love away and that is a woman hurting here. I think you guys should be kind to her. She deserves it.

Psychedelia: The OP is mixing up Feminists and Female Gender Supremacists.
They're very different.

Most of the time the leading light of feminism mix both up. I love women who are bold to their purpose, love their family, love God, love their husbands and still holds their head everywhere they go. These class of women are in high demand. They are the new order! I don't have any regard for any woman who thinks just being a feminist qualifies her to insult, disparage and or disregard the institution of marriage. Most of the leading light of feminism do not endorse marriage except it is between two women. And any woman who still call herself feminist and is successfully married is usually not seen as a core feminist by the leading members of the organization. They consider married women as sellouts!

For your reading pleasure I will reproduce the definition of feminist by the National Organization of Women (NOW) See here..."The simple fact is that every woman must be willing to be identified as a lesbian to be fully feminist" (National NOW Times, January, 1988). To them unless you are a lesbian then you are not fully feminist!
That is the definition of feminism by a feminist organization and now you know why some of us have no regard for that word feminist.

THEREFORE THE DEAL IS TO DEMAND FOR EQUAL TREATMENT FOR MEN WOMEN AND CHILDREN. That is what some may refer as being a humanist.

[quote author=Efemena_xy]Who opens their mouth down to laugh like that [/quote]Answer: Feminists!

^^^

If you do not want to be constructive, you can take your irritating self to another gossip thread and leave this place for you betters.

Being rude and uncouth is a virtue for irritants like you and i do not expect it to change soon.

Now that women better than you in all ramifications are making informed and brilliant posts, you dabble into the discourse with your abrasive behavior seeking for undue attention. I may have to ignore you and respond to only posters who are GENUINELY interested in this topic.

ileobatojo: What has all this got to do with the fact that they have publicly said they are not feminists?
And the fact that Meryl streep is a feminist with a long lasting successful marriage?
Do you understand the basic difference between people's character traits and feminism?

The topic is show ONE notable feminist with a great marriage or show ONE quote from a notable feminist in support of marriage.

The only poster that even came close to answering the question is sisikill

Now to answer her. Among the three women mentioned only Letty Cottin MAY be described as a conservative feminist because she had to even disagree with some of her colleagues at a point...now for your reading pleasure see this...In 1975, at the United Nations Conference on Women, the women's movement passed a platform declaring that "Zionism is Racism," and Letty challenged the anti-Israeli prejudice and anti-semitism in the women's movement by writing articles about it in Ms. and other publications."

Her marriage was only successful because she was able to create a balance between her fight for women's rights and her Jewish culture.

In fact, she was known to disagree with some of her feminist colleagues some times and many of them do not see her as a mainstream feminist.


Hilarry Clinton and Michele Obama are not feminists.

Demi more is an unstable character....see the links i posted ealier

Katy Perry wanted to dominate in her marriage...

Madonna is neither here nor there..

Beyonce herself according to the links you posted said that the word feminist can be extreme....and prefers to call herself a modern day feminist which is neither here no there.

[quote author=Efemena_xy]Haha!
Ile don get more 'victims'. This time, na serious crusade against fake monikers!
You go girl...'kill' 'em all [/quote]Ileobatojo herself has about 5 different monikers chillis, chillisauce, soul-glo. These are all her monikers! She thinks everybody is like her. That is why she accuses people.

TheMadame: Brilliant points .
I have always been in favour of equal rights for women but I would Not burn my bra because I want to appear as a feminist or challenge the authority of my husband just because I want to appear as a feminist.

Thank you my dear for being truthful and doing right by yourself. You are an asset to your husband.

Don't mind the rude and uncouth troubled and bitter misandrists who come here to talk thrash about the sacred institution of marriage.

ileobatojo: This re*tarded question has been long asked and answered. Only someone who lacks common sense will believe that this daft question by the OP is a good one. Anyway, since you appear to have problems counting up to one, let's give it another shot. Perhaps practicing your counting has made you perfect. Meryl Streep. Married since 1978.
Now here's a list of prominent and divorced non feminists:
Katy Perry, Madonna, Demi Moore. Add to that list of divorced non feminists probably the majority of divorce in Nigeria both celebrity and non celebrity.
Which leads me back to my question to the OP (or any of you other clowns that wants to answer) that you swooped in to rescue him from answering.
Can you set off this "intellectual debate" by providing proof of your opening statement and the premise for your thread?

I deliberately waited for you to finish huffing and puffing before I will lower the ax.......here goes

Meryl Streep is no feminist....Meryl Streep (born Mary Louise Streep; June 22, 1949)[2] is an American actress of theater, television, and film. She is widely regarded as one of the greatest film actresses of all time. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meryl_Streep Kindly show me where she was referred as a feminist in that biography or any other place......

Katy Perry ..... for your reading pleasure i will reproduce a quote from her why her husband divorced her.. In June 2013, she revealed in an interview with Vogue that Brand did not like the idea of her "being the boss" of things and never spoke to her again after texting her about his filing for divorce.
In other words, she wanted to be the 'boss' in her marriage! And that is very consistent with feminist ideology.

Demi Moore ....had a troubled childhood her step father and her mother were alcoholics and often fought each other. ...she and her mother were at a point alcoholics... she even posed nude while pregnant for a magazine once.... see her biography here http://www.thebiographychannel.co.uk/biographies/demi-moore.html. SHE IS AN UNSTABLE CHARACTER AND HAD MOTHER ISSUES.

Madonna...A new York Times article called Madonna the future of feminism...see here http://www.nytimes.com/1990/12/14/opinion/madonna-finally-a-real-feminist.html add to that the fact that she sells sex in her videos and you begin to understand the wreck she is and why holding down a marriage is difficult.

So my dear, as usual you failed again and there will be no promotion for you from kindergarten class!

or please use dinachi2013@gmail.com.

And send the mail directly to my box at zody6@yahoo.com. I don't know what is wrong with nairaland e-mail links. shalom

Cosmass: What is the benefit of being harsh? What is about this thread that would make you/others harsh? Did I post about reconciling with him or begging or what Also who is the new admirer? Is it because I said I sent a poster an email. I sent in regards to what he was asking about the relationship, didn't not want to write another long story on here.

My dear please don't mind them! These are the fake nairaland feminists who do not believe in the institution of marriage. It pains them to no end that you DARE say that you love your fiance. How dare you love him when they are available! If you want to ever settle down, stay far away from their kind. Shalom

Dantedasz: Why don't you address the meat of the OP, instead of generally acting like a coward and skirting the issues by attacking people.
1.Show us ONE prominent feminist that had/has a successful marriage.
OR
2.Show us ONE quote from a prominent feminist extolling the virtues/benefits of marriage.
This is a simple enough task and does not require eight ( pages of pussyfooting.
I rest my case, your honor, no more questions for this hostile witness.....

Classic! I endorse this message.

@ Ewuro I can't conceal my admiration for your maturity and absolute mastery in this subject. I believe your husband is extremely lucky to have a woman like you, who is not afraid to say her mind.

@ Bukatyne it is not yet late to retrace your steps and begin to move in the right direction....I have laboriously reproduced evil satanic quotes from leading world renowned feminists against the institution of marriage. I DID NOT SEE YOU CONDEMN THOSE STATEMENTS! I don't want to believe that you are in support of them! My challenge still stands. Yet none of you have been able to meet it! Produce ONE Notable feminist with a good marriage or if that fails produce ONE quote from a Notable feminist in support of the marriage institution.

@ Ileobatojo or chillis or Chillisauce or Soul-glo whatever turned you into a misandrist, i hope one day after a visit to your shrink and proper medication you may be able to see the light, if not, happy trolling!

@ pureOHio you are another smart woman that portends joy to your husband. You are a big asset.

Cosmass: Oh my! Guys LOL! A lot of harsh messages. I'm not contacting him or contacted him since. I am only asking on here 'cos I wonder sometimes, what would have made someone after 2 years, wedding date set etc suddenly turn around and not just that, the manner he used was very mean, degrading, belittling and of no value. I did not cheat on him. I just wanted to hear from the men, even after pleading like a fool, talking to the mum etc, he refused to at least respect me a bit to tell me to my face, why, the issues etc and leave on a clean slate.
I have been moving on guys.
I wrote it in my previous post. We had an argument 'cos he kept ignoring me and so I took the laptop he was working with and struggled. He called his mum, who came over to the place and reported me to her. I do not know why he stopped talking to me. I have pleaded and done every single thing like a fool. He did not tell me anything.

I think the situation bothers on disrespect and different personalities. This is what i deduced.

Your Fiance is..
1, An introvert

2, Too close to his mum and family ( A man needs to emotionally and physically separate from his family before he can build a new home)

3, He is the type that takes perceived slights very serious and do not forgive easily sometimes.

4, He has warned you about this particular attitude of nonchalance from you several times to no avail, therefore he now thinks that you take him for granted.

5, He is a careful meticulous person

You on the other hand are...

1, An extrovert..

2, Carefree playful person

3, You are taking him for granted without knowing it.


Here's my advice....


First, decide with all these difference in personality whether you can marry such a person and live with him for the rest of your life.

Secondly, Find out why you are attracted to him. What are those qualities you love about him . This call for serious soul searching.

Thirdly, after you have successfully navigated through the second point , then make up your mind whether you should go for him or not considering that it it not going to be easy. If he is a serious christian, approach his pastor and pour out your heart.

If he is not a serious christian , approach anyone (not his family members) who he has a lot of respect for and pour out your heart.

After that make your appeal to him face to face......in all this make sure you really love him before you embark on all this if not when he finally takes you back you may find yourself resenting him.

And avoid repeating same mistakes with him.


Finally, follow your love....don't mind what you hear on the forum here.....many of them are wimps in real life.

GOODLUCK!

bukatyne: Maybe the OP will ubderstand you
His fight should be with core feminists/feminazis abi?
I claim to be equal to my husband; if i can be nice to random people, how much more the man I vowed to live and honor? if i have no problem cooking for my room mates and family, why not him? If i am considerate of others and listen to them,why not my babe?
Shebi equality will mean he treats me well and vuce versa? To avoid nonsense treatment will now entail me to open eye choose abi?
I tire for this OP o
Jide sorry Ewuro, which one be tradutional benefits/ shoe shiner again?

Why are you guys always sidestepping the issue? Since you can't come up with any notable feminist with a good marriage. Can you reproduce one quote from any of them in support of marriage?

I know and understand that some women like you like to identify with the word feminist without understanding the full weight of its focus. My point is that you ladies need to be careful about the motives of some of this women. People who holds the marriage institution in contempt should not be the role models of women who want to get married or are happily married.

To each his/her own.

Some of the nairaland e-feminist do not even have a handle on the subjects. Generally, feminists do not believe in marriage between a man and woman. I will go ahead now to post top notable feminists quotes about marriage for your reading pleasure. You be the judge!

"Since marriage constitutes slavery for women, it is clear that the women's movement must concentrate on attacking this institution. Freedom for women cannot be won without the abolition of marriage." -- Sheila Cronin, the leader of the feminist organization NOW

"We can't destroy the inequities between men and women until we destroy marriage." -- Robin Morgan

"The nuclear family must be destroyed... Whatever its ultimate meaning, the break-up of families now is an objectively revolutionary process." -- Linda Gordon

"All sex, even consensual sex between a married couple, is an act of violence perpetrated against a woman." -- Catherine MacKinnon

"When a woman reaches orgasm with a man she is only collaborating with the patriarchal system, eroticizing her own oppression." -- Sheila Jeffrys

"The institution of sexual intercourse (between men and women) is anti-feminist" -- Ti-Grace Atkinson

"Heterosexual intercourse is the pure, formalized expression of contempt for women's bodies." -- Andrea Dworkin

"Marriage as an institution developed from rape as a practice." -- Andrea Dworkin

"Q: People think you are very hostile to men.
A: I am." -- Andrea Dworkin

"All patriarchists exalt the home and family as sacred, demanding it remain inviolate from prying eyes. Men want privacy for their violations of women... All women learn in childhood that women as a sex are men's prey."
-- Marilyn French

"Since marriage constitutes slavery for women, it is clear that the women's movement must concentrate on attacking this institution. Freedom for women cannot be won without the abolition of marriage" (feminist leader Sheila Cronan).


Now see feminist bigotry and chauvinism at work, read more quotes;

"We are, as a sex, infinitely superior to men." -- Elizabeth Cady Stanton

"Overthrowing capitalism is too small for us. We must overthrow the whole...patriarch!" (Gloria Steinem, radical feminist leader, editor of MS magazine).

"Let's forget about the mythical Jesus and look for encouragement, solace, and inspiration from real women.... Two thousand years of patriarchal rule under the shadow of the cross ought to be enough to turn women toward the feminist 'salvation' of this world." (Annie Laurie Gaylor, "Feminist Salvation," The Humanist, p. 37, July/August 1988.

"By the year 2000 we will, I hope, raise our children to believe in human potential, not God." (Gloria Steinem, editor of MS magazine).

See feminist support for witchcraft and Lesbianism

"Marriage has existed for the benefit of men; and has been a legally sanctioned method of control over women.... We must work to destroy it. The end of the institution of marriage is a necessary condition for the liberation of women. Therefore it is important for us to encourage women to leave their husbands and not to live individually with men.... All of history must be re-written in terms of oppression of women. We must go back to ancient female religions like witchcraft" (from "The Declaration of Feminism," November, 1971).

"The simple fact is that every woman must be willing to be identified as a lesbian to be fully feminist" (National NOW Times, January, 1988).

"Feminism is the theory, lesbianism is the practice." -- Ti-Grace Atkinson

Now these are quotes from the leading lights of feminism not nairaland wannabe fake feminists.

From these quotes, do you need to ask again why there are no core feminist with a good marriage? Some of them went ahead to equate Lesbianism with feminism.

Now I CHALLENGE you again to produce one quote from a core feminist in support of the marriage institution.

NOW MANY OF YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT YOUR DEFINITION OF FEMINISM HERE AND WHAT THE GLOBAL LEADERS OF THE MOVEMENT ARE SAYING ARE TOTALLY DIFFERENT. THOSE LEADERS ARE THE ACTUAL EMBODIMENT OF THE MOVEMENT. NOW READ BETWEEN THE LINES FOR ILLUMINATION.

[quote author=Sisi_Kill]This was from an old post on the same subject....
From the responses here, it is obvious many people have no clue what feminism is all about.
Thinking it is about men is the first mistake. Believing they hate men is the second. It is about standing against things, issues that makes women feel less of a human being.
It's about giving women choices and letting them make their own decisions. In the past and somewhat in the present, men have been the rule keepers and that's why it seems women are fighting men but if it were something else...An Alien from outta space in charge women would still fight with the same vigor.
If a woman choses to go into a polygamous relationship, that's her prerogative. If women are forced into polygamy, then feminist movement stands up against that.
If a woman wants to cover her head, walk ten steps behind her man and talk to him in her knees because she wants to, that's her choice but if a woman is being forced to do all that for no reason but because she is a woman, the feminists movement comes in
Again, Feminism is about fighting for a woman's God given right to make her own choices. That it's being basterdized and given qualities not in line with what it really is by people who are intent on rubbishing it is sad but what's sadder is women who take the bastardized version and ran with it. It's one thing for men not to educate themselves on what it truly means (it doesn't really affect them), it's quite another for a woman to just follow suit...regurgitating the crap being fed to them by men.
Feminism isn't about intimate orientation, it's not about always being on the opposing end of an argument just because the other person is a man. It's not about wanting to be a man. It's simply about being allowed to direct your own life. Why this is such an affront to some men has always baffled me.[/quote]Name one Notable core feminist with a good marriage. That is the simple challenge. Many of you nairaland feminists cannot defend some of the evil statements ascribed to your kind. A woman asking to be treated like every other human being is simply human right advocacy. Feminism is all about women. It is a sexist bigoted movement. The issue of equality is a human right issue! Even children are equal to adults as humans.

How come most core feminists are unable to hold it down in a marital relationship?

@ OP the only way one can give you good advice is if you tell us exactly what happened. I will not advice leaving him until I hear what happened between both of you. The fact that you have been begging seems to me that you are the offender. I do not support your fiances approach to the whole matter but it could be as a result of the fact that maybe you have been repeating that particular vice. So tell us exactly why he stopped talking to you...then we will be in a better position to advice.

Chillisauce: So YPP deactivated her account. The bans were just coming left and right.

At ileo and soul glo. Yall still here going back and forth with the resident mofon. You need to read how ppl reason before trying to educate them not to talk of engaging with debate.

This is another of her monikers . Because I attacked ileobatojo, she now reappears with chillisauce! Classic! It is just one misandrist rigmaroling between her various monikers.And of course she can't meet the challenge so she does what she knows best, trolling all over the thread.

AskProf: [b]Police have arrested the mother of a teen girl who was found murdered on Christmas Day.
According to the Casa Grande, Ariz., Police Department, Connie Villa, 35, allegedly attempted to kill all of four her children and her ex-husband Adam Villa on Dec. 25.
She has been charged with first-degree murder for the death of her daughter, 13-year-old Aniarael Macias, who was found dead in the family apartment bathroom.
Police said they believe that Villa called her ex-husband to come over on Christmas Day so that she could kill him. After he arrived, she allegedly stabbed him repeatedly in the torso, police said. Adam Villa was able to escape and call the police as he drove himself to the hospital.
When police arrived at Villa's apartment, they forced open the door and found her holding a knife to her chest with apparent self-inflicted stab wounds on her torso.
Villa's three younger children, ages 3, 5, and 8, were also found without any stab wounds. Macias' body was found in the bathroom, but she had no visible injuries, Casa Grande Police Department spokesman Thomas Anderson said.
Alzheimer's Patient Gets Six Months For Murder
After the younger children were taken to the hospital, trace amounts of opiates were found in their system. Police say they suspect Villa was trying to poison her children.
An autopsy conducted on Anariel on Saturday was inconclusive.
"We are anxiously awaiting the results of the toxicology report to determine that [cause of death]," Anderson said. "Evidence found on scene and interviews of the children give us cause to believe Aniarael was also given some type of prescription narcotic drug."
Connie Villa and Adam Villa were treated at two different hospitals and Adam Villa remained hospitalized today in stable condition. Although Adam Villa is the father of Connie Villa's three younger children, he is not the biological father of Aniarael Macias.
According to police, Aniarael's biological father has been working with investigators since the incident occurred.
Murder Convict May Be Freed by Appeals Court
Connie Villa was taken into custody by police this morning after she was released from the hospital.
In addition to the first degree murder charge, she faces four charges of attempted murder for allegedly trying to kill Adam Villa and her three younger children. The investigation is ongoing and Villa could face additional charges.
Her three younger children are under the care of Adam Villa's family, while he remains in the hospital, police said.[/b]
http://news.yahoo.com/mother-arrested-christmas-day-killing-teen-daughter-004739841--abc-news-topstories.html

That's a typical feminist for you! They are against husbands and children and they are usually mentally unstable!

WHY ARE FEMINISTS AFRAID OF MARRIAGE?

ileobatojo: Oooh look! He's trying to grow some cojones!
Yeah, you gotta do it under your original id to be taken seriously. Mkay?

You that always accuse other people of having several monikers you are surely the greatest offender. Your problem is that you think that other people behave like you. That's your loss. As if ileobatojo, chillis, chiliisauce, soul-glo and two others do not refer to the same person!

All these your juvenile rants need to stop. Since some of Chillisauce posts were hidden here, you now decide to come out with ileobatojo.

we are watching, we are waiting and at the appropriate time, we will unravel you!

mrsincredible: u knw village pple don't go to schl early. he was 17yrs nd knew wat he was doing is wrong. I was 13yrs old in sss1 nd I knw wat I was doing is wrong nd I stopped.

At the beginning or when he left?

My dear please note that I totally and completely condemn and abhor what he did. I am only just saying that he too may have been molested at the village also. The whole thing can be a vicious cycle.

The uncle that slept with her was also a kid ! read the post again. He stopped when he left for Secondary school. Are Jss1 students considered as adults?