₦airaland Forum

[quote author=Mynd_44]No it's not. At the beginning of a relationship, don't you set the "terms and conditions"? Like what you like in a woman and what you don't? If you don't do that you should start doing that. It helps avoid a lot of headaches[/quote]Relationships are not meant to be like legal documents where you set terms and conditions. I used to think relationship was about a man and a woman who are in love or have some kind of feelings for each other, who trust each other, support each other, understand each other and are willing to set aside their differences and respect each other. Most Nigerian guys that are in relationships are usually taken advantage of by their girlfriends for material possessions if they know it or not and I am asking myself why? Why are most Nigerian ladies materialistic.

[quote author=Mynd_44]The problem starts cos most guys are so desperate to get a particular babe that they lie and spend like Dangote. If from the start she asks for card and you tell her no, she would not ask you for a meal and she would not even dare ask you for a phone[/quote]I don't know what kind of mindset you have but from the picture I am getting from your posts, not a pretty one. Not all guys base their relationships on lies and there's no biggie about crediting a ladies phone so far she calls you with it sometime or taking her out dinner sometimes. My question is, why in most Nigerian relationships, the female see's it as a guise to take advantage of a guy's goodwill for material possessions. I thought a relationship was about being in love, understanding each other, trusting each other and respecting each other's differences?

pendo89: You are to blame poster.

You must set the pace right from the start. Look at the way you started it,Little by little she dug into ur pockets and you played along cz u wanted to apppear cool and able.
What is so difficult with telling a girl that you simply cannot afford what she asks for? Some girls are sober enough to understand that.
If she wants to step, let her do so early in the relationship before you have spent ur whole account on her.
You guys come to lament online after you have been dumped for not being able to do more.
My question usually is,Why did you do all she asked you to do at the beginning? Weren't u smart enough to know when to put ur foot down?
What are parties for if you cant afford to foot the bill? Some girls are so vain.I would rather buy a pair of shoe than throw a useless party which I can't afford.
Poster, You just couldn't resist the urge to please so dont blame the girls.

I did not come online to lament my sister, please can you read my post once more and stop twisting my words. I was just asking why are most Nigerian ladies materialistic and if you did take time to read my post, I wasn't dumped and I wasn't used as a pawn in her little game and I did not do all she asked, after the first instance, I did not do more.. I just wanted to know why? Is it a genetic thing or is the cause from the bad economy? I made this post to get credible responses from both male and female and not responses that are vile and insulting or sarcastic. This problem is very viral and it seems 4 out 5 guys in the Nigerian society are currently in such kind of relationships where the female partner is taking advantage of the relationship for materialistic possessions.

[quote author=Mynd_44]It means this topic is just silly.[/quote]Okay!

tellwisdom: Now weting make this gurl smart now??

Shey normal human being dey talk like this--> "If you decide to go for flashy-figure-8-tempting-to-touch-by-every-man types,please when they start asking you to pay for maintenance of all those packages don't complain,pls rmbr law of diminishing return"

Edumare gba mi oo

LOL

sosoluv: Its important for u early in a relationship to state what u can offer and u can't and what u are simply not willing to offer. Never go all out jus to keep some pretty face happy, unless she is willing to do the same for u.

Don't you think that would be too forward?.

cog1: First off,I would like to correct the erroneous impression that "all" Nigerian girls are materialistic. Its so untrue.
The fact that you've unfortunately been running into the wrong ones does not in any way justify that statement.
You,yourself,have work to do on yourself in terms of your method of selection for these your gfs sef.
If you decide to go for flashy-figure-8-tempting-to-touch-by-every-man types,please when they start asking you to pay for maintenance of all those packages don't complain,pls rmbr law of diminishing return!
Bros,go for a homely girl,and come and open another thread later about how thrifty naija girls can be.
2cents

Yes, I know not all Nigerian girls are materialistic but what would you call women from Kenya? Wouldn't you call them Kenyan women... Since the ladies in question that I have deemed materialistic are from Nigeria, I think I can call them Nigerian ladies so let's not verge away from the topic. I am not very selective or picky when it comes to finding a gal for a relationship, I think I do my pickings based on their character and judgement. I don't always go for as you put in flashy-figure-8-tempting-to-touch-by-every-man girls but even the ones I meet are pretenders.

Another point you're missing is that, it's not that I can't assist my gal financiallly but I become suspicious where everything is about money. The first 2 weeks we supposedly dated, this girl was like money for this money for that. I know a girl needs money for maintenance and what not. You don't need to ask me all the time for money for this and that, I have eyes, I know when a woman needs a good makeover, clothes and whatnot. I just dislike being pestered like I am some kind of ATM machine or something. You get my drift?

Yield: LOL. Mcheeew.

From yout statement, it seems his comment touched a nerve there that means there must be some atom of truth in 190 statement. LOL .

Theben:
Bros sorry o, I've also experienced same and i so much believe that gals from poor home are the most guilty of this. There was this gal i dated in my university days, our relationship lasted for just a year and that year happened to be my most frustrating year in school as i had to part with the meagre allowances from my parents just to please her. I thought i was in love. Felt much relieved after breaking up with her.
OP, i believe you also gave her the impression that you are loaded or perhaps she has seen you lavished your money in an outing. However, that is not to say that gals shouldn't cut the rate they demand from guys. For heaven sake, we are not your parents, a guy tends to give a gal maximum respect when he knows she has no use for his money.

Thanks for the wonderful comment Bro. I am sorry for your past ordeal too. Everyone has been telling me it was the impression that I gave her about being loaded. I don't give impressions, I live the way I live. I like to have the best in life and just because I don't want to be too ''flashy'' shouldn't mean I should hve less, don't you think. I don't see that as an excuse, I just believe Nigerian ladies are very materialistic, it's in their blood. I don't believe majority of girls from poor home are. I have dated a girl from such home and we had no problems whatsoever. For heavens sake too, please ladies, cut your billings from us ooh, we're not your parents.. LOL...

zannie: Its not a Naija tin please. U started by saying u spent on her @ first coz u ddnt want her to think u r cheap. Dats d impression u created and dats d impression she got. So dnt be complaining.
I am extremely proud to say I never collect a penny from any man, I dnt even know how I wud get past d shame of begging him. Dat way, I keep my pride and my dignity. And I knw many Nigerian girls like dat too.
And always bear in mind dat what u give is what u receive.

First of all, she asked and I couldn't just refuse since it was the beginning of the ''relationship''. I don't creat impressions. I live the way I live, I like to have the finest things in life. I am not complaining about why Nigerian women seek Nigerian man as their finantial sources, I'm asking why?

I'm happy to know you don't depend financially on your guy. I hope he is treating you the way a lady should be treated..

Drew

tobechi74: D prob is frm u. Haw du u aproach gals. Wat ist impresion d u gve them. Dat ure loaded.u got it all. U buy lunch daily-who send u?why?

D only way u show a gal u care is 2ru gft and cash ,buy dis and mat. WRONG.

Ist act like a frend. U mustnt see her evry day.gve her space.dnt always b wit her.u can du more phone cals and les seeing.askin ha out shud be once a week.dnt gve ha d ist impresin dat u want 2 date her.
They are many ways 2 care 4 gal witout spendin on her

Are you saying that I should not spend my finance the way I see fit. I am a guy of taste. I love to have the finer things in life and just because I don't want to give women the wrong impression, I should use bad cars, drink shepe, always eat at mama put, where worn out clothes and live in an uncomfortable environment?.

[quote author=Mynd_44]Another guy complaining about women and money. Please if the women annoy you, leave them and go for GUYS[/quote]I am not complaining but asking why? Those are clearly two different things.

cindyrella: *Sigh* Here we go again!
Same old story...

You as a female, are you being threatened by my post. From your exclamation, I would deduce you also feel the same was as I do on the issue... Right?!!

onila: nigeria is a materialistic society-we are the products of our society. .Nigerian men are also victimz

Okay?!!. Thanks for the comment.

190: eyah! OP pele

You should know that after God punished the egyptians with the 12 plagues in egypt

he sent NIGERIAN GIRLS to punish Mankind!

we are suffering for the sins of our fore fathers -


Nigerian girls are plagues sent to punish mankind!

LOL, you're very hilarious.

Name: Drew
Age: 28
YIM: chatwitheminem

Not looking for a date, just looking to meet new people and make friends.

Deleted

nevderek: lol yeah..
Its kinda funny when i see a lotta Nigerians making all that fuss about it

True and they have the wrong idea about the topic. They all think Illuminati is a way where the devil secretly enters our mind through their songs or something. They say artiste that use the sign on the songs or video have sold their soul to the devil like the devil would give you a written document for you to sign on...lol... If you see the panic that the topic is causing here, you go bow.

saxywale: U meant the gray squirrels that roam all over the United kingdom cos I have only seen rabbits as pets.

"In the United Kingdom, the eastern
gray squirrel which now has a population of over 2.5million has few natural predators. This has
aided its rapid population growth and has led to the
species being classed as a PEST . Measures are being
devised to reduce its numbers, including one plan for
celebrity television chefs to promote the idea of
EATING the squirrels". Culled from the guardian.

Lolz. @OP. Maybe we can start classifying lizards as bush meat but don't complain when roaches and all types of crawling insects invade your home.

You know we nigerians call squirel or bush rat rabbits.

It's because we don't eat them. There's not enough natural predators. Our climate supports their breeding. They have short gestation period and they have enough prey to feed on ( Insects, Flies ).

exu: unfortunately the christian church also spent a large portion of it's time persecuting and killing those who did not believe what they believed or who dared to question something which they could not understand...

it's not just islam that has caused people to be killed, christians have also killed in the name of 'God' with the backing of their religious leaders who have taken passages from their own religious texts to support the evil deeds...

both religions encourage hatred and intolerance...both religions raise the question as to how 'God' can allow his own followers to be so malicious...

I totally disargree with you there bro. Back then when the Catholic Christians were performing their Crusade against people of other Faith, they were force driven for political reason. It's what is happening today with the muslims. Back them, some people twist the word of GOD for personal and political reason. The reason why people could be so twisted was that only a selected few were able to get ahold of the Bible but now it's all different, we've learnt from our mistake and we want peace. I think the Muslims should too.

exu: unfortunately the christian church also spent a large portion of it's time persecuting and killing those who did not believe what they believed or who dared to question something which they could not understand...

it's not just islam that has caused people to be killed, christians have also killed in the name of 'God' with the backing of their religious leaders who have taken passages from their own religious texts to support the evil deeds...

both religions encourage hatred and intolerance...both religions raise the question as to how 'God' can allow his own followers to be so malicious...

I totally disargree with you there bro. Back then when the Catholic Christians were performing their Crusade against people of other Faith, they were force driven for political reason. It's what is happen today with the muslims. Back them, some people twist the word of GOD for personal and political reason. The reason why people could be so twisted was that only a selected few were able to get ahold of the Bible but now it's all different, we've learnt from our mistake and we want piece. I think the Muslims should too.

joe4christ: And you think such a God that says he honours his word more than his very name and that heaven and earth will surely pass away but not a tiny part of his word will ever pass away, such a God as this will just sit back and watch his word contaminated?
Think again bro, if the bible which is the word of the creator of the universe himself is inperfect then there is no basis for it to vindicate or judge anyone cause it's inperfect, but that is not true, Jesus is the very word of God and the very spirit which inspired the prophets and men of God who wrote the bible, God is perfect and his word cannot be otherwise, if you truly know more or even little about biblical history you would have known the numerous number of attempt by the roman catholics and other religion and world leaders who have done everything possible to destroy the word of God (BIBLE) for centuries without success.
The word of God stands firm forever!

My keypoint is HIS ways are not our ways. Out of that imperfect book as you call it, there's is perfection. If you really want to understand the Bible, do it with the inspiration of the Holy Spirit. I can't change your mind, seems your mind is already made up.

kandiikane: You tell me. Please explain to me which chapters have been "lost".

I can't really say what chapters has been lost but recently, a herder in one of this eastern nation close to Israel found some missing scrolls of the bible but they're still running their experiments to make sure it's authentic. My point is that we're moving away from the topic in general. The bible has been translated from it's original language which was Aramaic to the numerous English ones available. Do you know how many messages and meaning that might have been lost. Also, talking about volume, the Bible is to small to give every account of Job's life. There might be some missing points which the translators at that time did not think were neccessary. Do you how how large the Bible would have been if they gave every account of Job. Job might have done something wrong for him to be tested. I am not sure. HIS ways are not my ways so let's not take chapters and verses from the Bible and twist them to make them contradictory and deceiving.

nevderek: Its all publicity stunts..
in the world, once something is tagged forbidden, it gains larger interest.
Hence by claiming to belong with illuminati or the masons these guys garner a lotta buzz.
For instance everyone wants to see the video Jay did the sign on, though with different purposes, some because they think they are exposing the devil lol, some simply outta curiosity or even just to criticize it, whatever the reason, it still helps the music sell and that's all that matters to the artist and label execs..
And the guy making all those videos they call "the devil in music" is just one smart guy who found out a lil way to generate income.
Of recent, these musicians are claiming saints, quoting bible in their songs (Rick Ross) or even songs thanking Jesus for their success (jay n kanye's sweet baby Jesus)
Just last night Kanye all clothed in white ended his performance at the BET with "in Jesus name" reporters talking about that, keeps the world interested..
Lady gaga thanks God when she wins an award yet dresses up like a monster, see the irony?
Its juz showbiz, anything that will keep fans thrilled, haters hating and critics talking, it all helps record sales.
Check MJ.
Free mason thrives in secrecy which is a sharp contrast to what our celebs represent, illuminati too but its extinct..
Even small small Ogboli, the members dont flaunt the shit..

Word!, you've just nailed it. I was thinking the same thing. Publicity stunt.

kandiikane: What do you mean lost? You mean so many chapters Removed because it did not go with what [b]MAN [/b]wants?

What chapters where removed if you care to explain?.

Obijulius: I have never met a true atheist(going by the definition of atheism). What we have are loafers puffed up with pride or some fellows who are so frustrated by the sufferings on earth that the easiest way out is to blame the Maker.

Most of u so-called atheists will run to science to fight ur case. And yet science deals with Cause and Effect. Science also realises that more often than not it is practically impossible to explain the Cause.

Science however, never doubts that there is a cause for every effect, with the limitation that science cannot explain the super Cause using empirical methods. Thus science can study and explain the creation and not the Creator.

The atheist is not a scientist, his belief system is not based on sound reasoning. Rather on pride and a loathsome desire to look different. And yet unconsciously he must live by the rules of the Creator, he must obey the laws of nature (the effect), and he will remain a benefactor of this One, whose existence and power he seeks to rubbish (foolishly).

Would the atheist believe in God if there was no story of Job? Answer 4 ur selves. For like the Devil, you will keep seeking excuses for ur foolishness.

If any of u can explain CREATION in atheist terms (reasonably and without junkering about), I myself would become an atheist, I want to stand out too. ℓ☺ℓ

Nailed it!

Too much photoshop in this picture homeboy. You're just an average looking guy, don't fool yourself..

By the way, my girl rates you a 5 so thumbs up.

One thing people tend to forget is that the Bible is a very old book, so many chapters lost and so many meanings lost from translating from the original language it was written in ( Aramaic ) to the present English language that it is in today. Think about it, It changed from Aramaic- Hebrew-Latin- English, so many meanings lost. Remember it's people who translated the Bible and they would ''fit in'' whatever meaning they think fits. I think the only way to fully understand the bible and not get confused and deceived is by reading The Holy Book with the inspiration of the Holy Spirit.

Also put in mind, that it is a small book in volume, how can one put the whole account of Job's life in one book. There must be a reason why GOD allowed Job family and wealth to be attacked. I bet he must have done something very wrong which they did not put in the bible because of space and The Lord allowed the devil to test him so he could redeem himself which he did. I'm not a scholar but this is my little understanding. Remember where GOD said '' My ways are not your ways''. People think.

Note: Please people should stop testing Christianity. It has stood the test of time as the only true religion out there. A religion of peace, a religion where if a man slaps you, turn the other cheek for him to. A religion where all the prophecies in the book are coming to past. You don't need to post hateful regards about this religion as we Christians don't have the time or belittle ourselves to post hateful regards to your religion. We respect and accepts people's difference. If you don't understand something in the Bible, ask and don't try to cause confusion. If you're an Atheist, a Muslim, a Budhist, a Zoeist keep it to yourself. I don't challenge your teachings or whatever you do and please don't challenge mine.

MRbrownJAY: @O.D.B, Banim, Druid06
the question was if you would see it as cheating, NOT if you would join or not, lol!



kai bro, so now there is "good kind of cheating"?!

It's cheating on my girlfriend/wife's part but it's something that could be ignored so far I get my piece of the action.. LOL...

It is not just a sign of love but a sign of intimacy. African men are very clueless. I am a guy and I like to cuddle my girl on the bed or be cuddled once in a while. It's cute and tenderly.