₦airaland Forum

One thousand plus words. If you don't drop a TLDR summation, I'll move to better things. I'm not paid for my time here.

Jacktheripper:
I wouldn’t have called my late father’s number if I had known what was waiting for me on the other end. But as they say, curiosity killed the cat.

A Little Backstory...My dad died in 2020, just before the COVID-19 wave hit the world. But his was not a pandemic-related death, it was a car accident. One moment, he was coming back from work; the next, he was gone. We buried him less than a week later, and that was it. Life moved on… well, at least for everyone else.

For us, his wife and four children, were left to figure out how to exist in a world that no longer had him in it. But apart from the usual grief and occasional cries in the bathroom, nothing out of the ordinary happened.

One fateful day, I was scrolling through Twitter when I saw a tweet that MTN recycles old numbers and gives them to new users. The replies were filled with people confirming this horror.

My curiosity woke up from its long nap and stretched dramatically.

Wait a minute, what about my dad’s number? Nobody had touched his SIM since he died, and it wasn’t linked to any bank account, so I figured it must have been reassigned by now.

So, naturally, I did what any reasonable person would do. I dialed the number.

And, not to my surprise, it rang.

I chuckled. "MTN, well done. Anyway, let me wait for the person to pick up so I can tell them it was a wrong number before they start hunting me down trying to figure out who called."

But then they picked up. And the voice that said, "Hello" was... familiar. Too familiar.

It was my father’s voice.

I ended the call so fast, I nearly flung my phone across the room.

At this point, my whole body was vibrating like an overused tiger generator. But I’m a rational person (or so I told myself), so I turned to Google for answers. That was when I stumbled upon something called auditory pareidolia, basically, when your brain tricks you into hearing familiar voices in random sounds. That made sense.

So, I called the number again to prove to myself that I was just "pareidolia-ing" (yes, I just made that a word).

I called the number again.

This time, it was unreachable.

I tried the next day. Unreachable.

I tried for weeks. Still unreachable.

I even took things further, checked WhatsApp, Truecaller, every caller ID app I could find. Nothing. It was as if the number didn’t exist.

I didn’t tell anyone, because let’s be real, imagine explaining to your family that you think Dad’s ghost might have answered a phone call. I have been called weird enough, I don't want to add to it.

But then, around two months later, the knocking started.

At first, it was small. A knock here, a knock there. We assumed it was one of the neighborhood kids playing a prank (Even though that explanation makes no sense, as our neighbor doesn't have kids, and our house is fenced).

But soon, the knocks became frequent.

Morning. Afternoon. Evening. midnight.

It got to a point where nobody in the house could sleep properly.

The worst part is that whenever we opened the door, we saw nothing. No sound of footsteps running away, no neighbor pretending they weren’t involved. Just silence.

It became so frequent we had to call for intervention. CCTV cameras were installed. Nothing. We called in the uncles, the cousins, even the nosy neighbors, everybody investigated, nobody found anything.

It was when the knocks started happening inside the house that we knew it was time to carry our bags and go.

We called in spiritual reinforcements. The prayer warriors came with their holy water, anointing oil, and enough incense to suffocate a mosquito. They sprinkled, they prayed, they chanted, they burned things.

Finally, they said, “It is done. You can move back in.”

And because it was our only house, we had no choice but to believe them.

Thankfully, the knocking stopped.

But my curiosity didn't stop.

I didn’t think too much about any connection between a random phone call and the mysterious knocking on our door. After all, strange things happen every day.

So, I kept trying the number.

One fateful evening, the line rang again.

I had my script ready. The moment they picked, I would say, “Please, is this Mr. Felix?” (my dad’s name). If they said no, I’d apologize and move on. If they said yes…well, God abeg.

The person picked up. And before I could speak, I heard:

"Stop calling this number."

Not in English. Not in a strange voice. In my father’s exact tone and our local language.

Ah. Who sent me message?

I tried calling back immediately. Unreachable.

At this point, my brain was screaming “Let it go!”, but curiosity had already replaced my common sense.

That night, at around 2:12 AM, we heard sweeping in the compound.

First of all, who sweeps at that hour?

I turned to my mother. She turned to me. The unspoken agreement was clear: We must confirm what is going on.

We stepped outside. Nothing.

No person. No broom. No sound of footsteps. But the sweeping was loud and clear.

For months, this unseen housekeeper continued. Sweeping the compound. Sweeping the passage inside the house. And yet, somehow, the place never got cleaner, everything was the same except the sound of sweeping.

At this point, enough was enough.

We reached for the leftover incense from the first time. If it worked before, it must work again.

Despite all the warnings from the universe, I still wanted to know who was behind the voice.

So I still kept trying to reach the person, and finally, on November 21, 2024, the line rang again.

I opened my mouth to speak, but my tongue refused to move.

I tried again. Nothing.

The only thing I heard from the other end was “Bye.” In my dad’s voice.

The call ended.

From that day till now, my tongue has remained twisted. I have not been able to speak a single word.

I wrote everything down for my mother. We went to the MTN office, provided every document they asked for, hoping to track the person who answered the calls.

Their response was cold: “There has been no activity on this line since 2020.”

We have seen every doctor possible. Nothing. Nobody can explain why I cannot speak.

Our last hope is an appointment with a top doctor in India this August. Until then, all I can do is wait.

And most importantly, maybe never, ever call a dead man’s number again.

She's enjoying her engagement. It's like the person enjoying his/her first relationship. Youthful exuberance dey worry am.

Nothing new. Most rappers say the same after visiting. They are from the hood so their first instruction is "I want to see the hood life this place offers." It stuns them when they see that this place is only a level better than medieval living. It humbles them. The statement doesn't come from a bad place. He wants Americans to appreciate what they were given. If those in Nigerian slums don't commit suicide out of frustration, there is no reason why someone in the hood who has clean drinking water should do so. That last statement looks like it was typed by a Nigerian.

See bored children online ranting and raving. Na their work. Flesh bots.

Nigerian journalists will never get it right. Title says goat meat, article shows sheep. In this Tik Tok generation, they believe people will read up to eight hundred words. They’ll go the way of NTA.

Moniya4Real:
Story.so,because you like bones now, we should be eating bones with you. Keep enjoying your bone in peace bro.
You have been brainwashed by western standard on how a woman should look. It's definitely not okay to be too far or too skinny. But jokes apart bro,Try googling up the beauty contestants of the 70s and 80s and revert if you are willing to.

Knowing the population of Sango Ota mongrels in this forum, someone will surely report me for posting pornography. Take it easy with soap.

https://d2c0db5b8fb27c1c9887-9b32efc83a6b298bb22e7a1df0837426.ssl.cf2.rackcdn.com/22381885-dl-1341x1679.jpeg

PrinceofAgoAre:
How do you feel so comfortable saying that.



You look like you could fvck an ogre...

Dey there. Bimpe knows all the positions I want to put her in.

Moniya4Real:
Fat? You really need your head examined. You are calling an ideal African woman fat , with this beautiful body of hers?. But if it's a yanshless, breathless and bony woman now- You would have liked her that way. Continue....

…and this is why Yoruba women compete with hippos like size is a beneficial trait. Anytime I see an obese woman acting brand new, I always know a Yoruba man is behind it.

Wordsfrombimpe:
Happy Sunday 🥰
Happy Mother’s Day To Me 🥰 - I will be a Great Wife & Mother 🥰

This one na advertisement? Which one is “I will be…” Come so I’ll impregnate you. Easier said than done.

AbokiWam:
There's this dude who owns about two at my workplace.

Walahi ever since I saw him, I started looking at him suspiciously.

Even the colors look feminine.

As a Man why would you own Pink and Sky blue Stanley Cups?

I’m Nigerian. I do not need a Stanley cup. The clay pot in the village is more than enough for my needs.

Haboseyday:
Fat burning workout for everyone (no equipment)


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1BTZfJZpB4?si=57NyU4CrHc7FWicx

La click…

Till this day, many from the ALUU situation have not faced justice. This may follow the same course.

osayuwamwen:
No retaliation go happen if they try kill anyone in retaliation the entire hausa and fulani in edo state go run if not na man hunt for them operation kill hausa/fulani

Easy to claim. Reality is mostly disappointing.

The clash occurred just hours after the United States Embassy in Nigeria issued a security alert, warning its citizens about planned IMN protests in Abuja and other major cities on Friday.

CIA doings. They knew about the event before it took place. Yankee securing their interest in supposed former colonies.

The article didn’t mention what the protest was about. They claimed it happened repeatedly in the past. Over what? Na hunger? Them wan destabilize Tinubu administration? What exactly? How will the members protest on empty — oh, their fasting period is over. They have energy now.

What happens in cases like this is perpetrators disappear for two weeks or more in fear of reprisal attacks. Most of the people who will be retaliated on will be the innocent. Nigerians with their “smartness.” They perform it at the detriment of everyone else.

This Nairaland is very useless. Twenty years on and there are no dedicated men on ground to report factual events of happenings. All the forum does is pick any story from social media and plaster it on the front page. Original content keeps people engaged and always coming back. Check all forms of social media. They strive to create original content to differentiate themselves from the rest and hold customers loyal to the brand. Most of the millennials who started with this place outgrew it and left. The person in power is clueless on why members dwindle as years pass. He believes creating alternate accounts to spam rage bait will work forever. I laugh. Me sef go tire leave soon. Make this forum public and create a board like Reddit. Having many people in control of things will generate new ideas on how make money. No, he will not survive fragmented ownership of Nairaland. He would be booted out in less than a year.

ScamHunter:
For me, I think resource control by natives may be the solution. A first step solution. Secondly, I think most Africans whose land bear immense resources should clamor for independence from colonial contraptions. Them they all must halt exploitation of their resources until they build the capacity to do so themselves - exploration, extraction and processing should be indigenously done. European contraptions like Nigeria, Angola, Congo, South Africa, etc are profligates meant to serve the white man, not Africans.

You dey fear to ask AI wetin be cousin sister.

Wordsfrombimpe:
Message To Nigerian Youths - Please 🙏 Do Not Commit Suicide , Stay Strong 💪

Watch & Subscribe ⬇️


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YaQxQGu_1eg?si=J-W5k9KwPfW0xAfh

Share this link to touch even if it’s one Nigeria 🇳🇬 Youths - let’s stand strong 💪 together, let’s spread hope and positivity , please do not give up 🆙

Bimpe, what happened? So you don’t want weak minded people to leave us on earth to tough things out? Don’t be wicked. Earth has limited resources. Those who can’t struggle should relocate. I support suicide. Life is hard.

Saturnalia:
People who go to night clubs to pick money that Yahoo Boyz & Ritualists throw on the dance floor with the intention of stealing & diverting the “Destiny, Glory & Virtues” of the UNFORTUNATE PEOPLE that will pick such “Ritualized” Money.

Thank you. It wasn’t explained in the article. All I saw highlighted were how she dressed to look good and her experience with the bouncer.

What’s a professional money picker?

Destiny Paul Victor. Na English man?

When did she shorten her name? I was wondering if I smoked something before reading the report.

Ilamina:

Who is Ilamina?

Ilamina:
What's your favourite movie that came out between 2000 - 2017

Who is Ilamina?

Ilamina:

Who is Ilamina?

Ilamina:
Caribbean is blessed

So elegant and awesome

But they party too much

Who is Ilamina?

-

Speed limit cameras, to be enforced by who? ROFLMAO. Naija never ready.


[UPDATE] All the boys blowing up my mention are dim. I’ve been in this forum since 2011. Never have I come across a thread which complained that a street camera caused a seizure of the person’s vehicle. If there is one, point it to me.

In 2013, when Boko Haram caused an explosion in Abuja. There was noise in every Nigerian state about installation of street cameras to commence in order to fight crime. Nairaland followed the news for two weeks until everything fizzled into nothing. Come at me with facts.

IyanAtiEgusi:
who be the boyfriend?

Surely not you.

His body, his life. Women love men with tattoos. He should carry on.

smartlad:
Eejo
I beg you in the name of God to help me. I have nothing to eat

Continue trolling Nairaland. Food will materialize from thin air.