₦airaland Forum

7 Things Parents Should Tell Their Kids Every Day
BY KAREN SALMANSOHN

There are many ways to say “I love you” to your children, without actually uttering those three small-but-mighty words. Below are my seven favorite alternatives, which also double-duty as “Empowering Life Philosophies” for raising kids who feel resilient — kids who feel deep inside themselves that they have what it takes to bounce back from life’s assorted (and sordid!) challenges.

After all, let’s face it. No matter how hard we all try to travel a bump-free path to happiness, life will always present its share of surprise potholes.

I don't literally mean to literally say each one of these 7 things every single day. Switch 'em up. Sprinkle them into your day.

1. “I believe in you.”

I've told my 3-year-old son, Ari, “I believe in you” so frequently, that he’s started to boomerang these words right back at me.

Funny example: The other day I was ransacking our apartment for my keys. I collapsed on the sofa, frustrated because I couldn’t find them. Suddenly I felt a tug, tug, tug on my yoga pants. It was Ari.

“Mommy,” he says, “I know you can find your keys. I believe in you.”

His words were just the booster shot of adrenaline I needed to stand up and try pulling the sofa away from the wall for a quick peek behind it. Eureka! I found my lost keys!

Yep! I greatly believe in the propulsion power of “I believe in you!”

2. “Never give up.”

Actually, when I say these words to my son, I say them three times in a row, in a silly, exaggerated, Winston-Churchill-type voice: “Never give up! Never give up! Never give up!”

This makes Ari giggle. And laughter is a great stress reliever, which continues to move him forward.

Recently, however, I realized these words need an important addendum. My son and I were putting together a Spiderman puzzle. Ari kept trying to squeeze the wrong puzzle piece into an empty puzzle space — while repeating: “Never give up! Never give up! Never give up!”

I corrected him by saying: “Never give up! Never give up! Never give up! Unless of course you’re doing something which might be wrong — then you need to stop, think and come up with a new strategy!”

“A new strategy?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said, “If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting. If nothing changes, nothing changes. So … you need to look for a new way of doing it, a new strategy, to get new results.”

Ari now recognizes the importance of never giving up, while also being open to seeking new strategies.

3. “Practice is how we learn.”

This phrase reminds Ari not to be upset at himself for slip-ups and downfalls. I like to say this not only during a challenging activity, but also before, as a warmly worded warm up.

4. "Every expert started out as a beginner — just like you."

I feel it’s essential to remind Ari that people who are awesome at something didn’t start off awesome.

I want my son to grow up knowing that it’s OK to make mistakes. It’s OK to fail. It’s OK to struggle. What’s not OK is to think that mistakes, failure and struggle are permanent states of being! They’re simply a bridge you need to keep traveling across to get yourself to “The Land of Awesome.” I want my son to grow up knowing that persistence, patience and effort are all far more important than perfection.

5. “Failure is not an option.

”I received this mantra via one of Ari’s talking ninja toys. When I first heard the toy utter this phrase, I said: “OOOooooooh I love this toy! Failure is not an option! That’s a good one!”

Ari and I then talked a bit about what this phrase means, things like: keep on trying, learn from everything, don't view it as "failure" but as "fullure" — "full" of lessons and insights to learn so you can try again with a new strategy and lots. So failure is never an option. One’s options are: learning, growing, letting it go, loving oneself for trying, and trying again!

Now whenever Ari is having trouble doing something, he’ll Ninja-Up and announce: “Failure is not an option!” Thanks to this phrase, Ari has become better and better at learning to read books!

6. “You gotta learn from every oopsy and ouchie.”

Each time Ari spills something, breaks something, drops something, kicks something, hurts something — I repeat for him this same little verbal ditty: “You gotta learn from every oopsy and ouchie.” I then ask him to specifically tell me what he learned from whatever the oopsy or ouchie might be — and we talk it through.

I let him know we all make oopsies and ouchies. We just have to try not to make the same oopsy or ouchie more than once.

7. “You are safe and loved.”

I recently added this phrase into my “Resiliency Words Tool Kit” after doing a hypnosis session with my friend. She was trying to put me into a relaxed emotional state. Her strategy? She asked me to remember a time in my childhood when I felt safe and loved. Hoo boy! As soon as she requested this, I tensed up instead of calming down! I couldn’t remember a clear, definitive time in my childhood where I felt safe and loved.

Afterward I thought about how important it is to raise kids to feel safe and loved. It bolsters their self-esteem and encourages courage.

I’ve now added the words “You are safe and loved!” into my goodnight ritual for my son. I whisper these words softly in his ear before he drifts off to sleep. “You are safe and loved.” I truly hope this quiet whisper creates a loud, infinite echo which lasts him long into adulthood.

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-14052/7-things-parents-should-tell-their-kids-every-day.html

In traffic, opp of red is green. Just like in religion white stands for holy and black for evil.

I can up it to 500k if its very neat.

I'm in need to toyota camry, drop light to be precise, I have a budget of 450k. Neat and accident free, with factory fitted A/C and neat interior.
Do send your pictures and contact me on 08085542796
Thanks

Still looks like a bad dream to me...wanna wake up

Are you for real?

Guys please what's the advantage of rooting a phone? I'm a novice and would like to learn from you gurus

Hello guys, thanks for the awesome informatioins you are sharing here. @op, thanks for creating this forum, my thumbs are up for you.
Please house, I'd like to know if there's a website to learn interior design? Any useful information about this will be highly appreciated.
Thanks

Guys common na, that picture is very old. He used it during 2007 campain election...lets not judge everything we read from the sufface.
@op, get a life and stop fooling yourself in public

Hello and good morning to you. I would like to know if there is a use for platain peel, cos of the volume after making use of the main platain.
Thanks

Such is life.

The name of the leopard is Lacadima, this video is as old as 2003.

God bless the fellow that donated this charitable gesture, may you continue to give and never have reason to be in unnecessary wants. As they say givers never lack. I would have loved to have this book, but it will only be for the knowledge as I don't have land or the finance to run a farm, I already have goat and pig manual from you, its been very educating, in as much that I will like to want to expand my knowledge, I think someone else who's ready deserves it and it won't be fair to just keep it instead of it to enrich someone who truly deserves it... What I'm trying to say is that, let the right person earn it.
Cheers

balogunsam: would you buy this at 35,000 naira?

7 inch GPS Bluetooth MTK6577 3G GSM Phone tablet pc

OS: Android 4.1; Supports Flash 11.0
LCD module: 7" TFT, QHD, 16M colors 1024*600 pixels Bright HD screen
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Hello, ios iot still available?

cheapgadgets6: I hav veri cheap 7" and 9" tabs with features such as dual cam,hdmi,blutooth,g sensor,ultra slim,in built 3g,phone calling etc ...7" @25k,9" @30k...email me: cheapgadgets5@gmail.com,bb pin:31093e40,tel:08106326186

Need to see D̶̲̥̅̊ pix cos I want to actually change my fone.

balogunsam: 3G sIM Rnabled tablets at 28000 naira only...just three pieces left.

I tink am interested, wats D̶̲̥̅̊ make Of D̶̲̥̅̊ fone?

I need a pure Neopolitan Mastif puppy(female), and price.

kentochi: @Egomah If you are in benin you can order for Ʊя̲̅ birds at Zartech, they have office in Sapele road, just after Santana market.
I school in Auchi and am staying here for now pls i will need your help to put me through cos i need to start after my exam next month can i have your contact. how much is a day old.

Not yet a farmer, but which ever way I can assist I will. Zartech is just within my benin apartment in GRA. As you were asking where to get chicks from in Edo state, so I thought I should let you know.

kentochi: pls am living in Edo state how can i get this chicken or how do i go about it pls i need help cos i will be rounding up from school by next month and real real need to start up something good with my life.

If you are in benin you can order for Ʊя̲̅ birds at Zartech, they have office in Sapele road, just after Santana market

Ijogz K: Its Mastilo Napolentano Aka Italian bulk dog, aka Italian Mastiff

Fery fery powervul!!!

Thanks man, noted

Anyone with Mastilo Napolito(Neopolitan Mastif)? Female puppy and how much?

kα̲̅γ̲̣̣̥ man, I can see how you think with nice compliments. I wish you the best on Ʊя̲̅ property, it was just my opinion and it may not count, but I have a right to say something, be it pleasing to you or not, you don't have to insult yourself here Dε̲̣̣̣̥aя̩̥̊ . But that property to me is not worth 140m, the house on it is not worth 10 and the land space is not worth 40m, that's how I do my valuation.
Thanks man, from the Smart Boy....now this is how I think, so define me

Well, good luck, but I don't think that's gold to me, I'm not blind and it does not blink. I know you put 140, but even if its 40m I won't buy. BTW Have you seen 100m before?

I'm sorry to say, but this building is not worth 40m, I'd rather buy land in chevron estate for 100m and build a very decent structure with 40m than considering this property.
And mind you the land is about half acre to build a master piece