₦airaland Forum

ADAMUdaCOWBOY:
Do we have to kill everything? It's becoming annoying!

Mumu. So, if u c an alligator in ur house today, u no go kill am? Mr do good. If u like, if u c a snake in ur premises, don't kill it oh. Wait until it kills u.

nikkiking:
Op u forget to tell the wife to clean up her armpit


The kind odour oozing out from her armpit fit cause running stomach .

Ode!!!! Na u know.

ernesty20:
:DI dnt like fat women. They always smell


"modified" so i am FTC.. No wonder the guilty ones are quoting me like craze

R u not very stvpid?

Towncrier247:
Lol..A splendor Mag's photographer took the above photos of Big Brother Africa Star Uti Nwachukwu recently with a fan. However, at the rear was this man checking out, seriously checking out Uti from the back.

Anyone knows this man, and what could he be looking at with so much interest?

www.splendormag.com/2014/08/exclusive-photos-of-day-man-seriously.html

How shallow can u be? R u blind or what? How does it look like he's scoping uti now?

Wtf?! What a stupid thread! One wud think it's a real life story not knowing it's a clip from calculator. Mstcheeeewwww.

humilitypays:
I am very aware that what I am about to write will not go down well with many readers on this forum, but then, the truth must be told.

In as much as I do not support single ladies being too forward about money and material things, I do not support a single guy going into a relationship when he has not found his direction in life; more especially nowadays that increase in population has made it very difficult for young people to find job after school.

I will be making reference to the Holy Bible to back up my stand, but before then, let's take a look at some of the disadvantages of a guy going into a committed relationship when he is still struggling:

1. He gets distracted: women are emotional creatures that require lots of emotional attention to satisfy, so for a guy who's still struggling financially, keeping a committed relationship will most likely distract him from chasing his life dreams.

2. Financial waste: no matter what you think or say, keeping a girlfriend cost money, especially nowadays that technology has taken over the world.

Buying call cards to say hi to her, buying gifts for her on special occasions, taking her out for dates, and other frivolous spending cost money which the guy can invest on himself to acquire ICT skill/certification, etc.

I won't bore you guys with too many points, so let me jump straight to the Bible backing.

During the process of creation as narrated in the book of Genesis, the world was without form, nothing existed and God created heaven and earth, sea, oceans, forests, trees, animals and every other thing on earth.

And God looked at the earth and saw its beauty, and decided to create the first human.

Please I want you guys to pay close attention to the preceding paragraphs of this write-up.

When God decided to create human being, God didn't create man and woman the same day, instead God first created man- Adam.

Adam lived alone for long, moving around the earth (Garden of Eden), taking care of the animals, trees, fishes, etc and God saw that He was lonely and needed company and helper, and God decided to create Eve to keep Adam company and to also be his helper.

The moment Adam woke up and saw Eve, he fell in love with Eve without waiting for many years to develop love, and Eve also fell in love with him without having to screen him to know how much he's worth and what he has to offer her.

Note 1: there's true love at first sight, don't doubt it or condemn it, its real!

My point:

God first created Adam, and Adam had virtually everything he needed to survive- shelter (whether under tree or whatever), food, etc before God brought him a wife!

So to the single guys reading this, please pray to God to bless your daily life activities so that you can succeed first before getting a woman, and you know why?

1. Woman is not the most important thing to a man, his work (goal in life) is.

Give a poor man the most beautiful woman who truly loves him, I bet you guys the man will run abandon the woman lol

2. A man feels more good in a relationship when he is financially stable than when he is financially broke!

3. No matter how rich a man's girlfriend/wife is, the man will never feel satisfied with the woman until he himself is financially stable too.

4. The true behaviour of a man can only be known when he is financially okay, and not when he is broke!

5. Naturally, by default, every woman desires to be with a man who is more financially capable than her.

This is one major reason Oprah Winfrey never married. Same reason Linda Ikeji, Genevieve Nnaji, Rita Domnic, Agbani Darego, Rihanna, etc are all single secretly searching for that guy that has more money and fame to come make their dream come true.

Don't ever think guys aren't proposing to the aforementioned ladies because I can bet my nairaland username that thousands of suitors who may not be as rich and popular as them are asking them out on daily basis.

So guys stop nagging and attacking the ladies; ladies aren't the problem, our common enemies are the past and present politicians who ruined our national economy, leaving the youths helpless and jobless!

It is the politicians that we youths should hate and attack for embezzling our common national wealth for their personal use.

We need to pray for a better Nigeria with many great job opportunities for the youths, and we must also condemn giving better jobs to females who do not qualify to the detriment of guys with better qualification.

Lastly, ladies please I am not encouraging going after already made guys only, please give all guys equal chance of friendship because that broke guy today maybe the next Forbe's billionaire tomorrow, so always pray for God's direction and do use your wisdom!

Guy, u made sense jare. God bless you and make u wiser.

haul:
Calm your bo0bs down before the river between your thighs get dried up, you scream future wife up and down, was that the best nursery rhyme your 256mb ram could process?

Relax Next time, we aint all going to marry, your threat is petty, you do slap through your device I guess! Bloody thot!

Ode!!!!

FriedPlantain:
Ok I have heard you, can you please now shut the _fuck up?

So y the cursing? So unnecessary and childish. Ur pained.

januzaj:
basketmouth jokes dry like dija's booby

Pot calling kettle black. Even u sef ur dry AF!!!

FriedPlantain:
You are a disgrace to the word 'disgrace', heck, calling you a disgrace is like doing you a big favour, anuofia! Post a picture of yourself lying down unclad as well let's judge what you look like. My quess is you won't look too far from a baby quinea pig.

Typical wande coal fan. U r pained sha. Y u dey swallow the black man's aspirin for him? R u his relative? These pics r scandals of artistes to show u dey ain't perfect. People must surely yab them. Deal with it.

jantofubu:
wande coal see as davido open mouth like cow leg galz are idiots sha some1's wife to be is busy dragging cloth on another guy tryin to make ends meet inshort all 9ja celebs mumu except don jazzy

Nigga, watch ur statements. Dont just generalise by saying gals r idiots. Dont u have sisters or a mother? Besides u will marry one someday unless ur gay. Wud u feel alright if gals go about saying boys r idiots? Even if related to this context, it's not cool. In those pictures shown, who knows, ur future wife cud be in that crowd. Be careful!!!

Dekatron:
He works in mysterious ways. Yet when I behave mysterious, I am tagged EVIL. By induction that I am God's image, then God is evil



I think God feels insecure



non of my business sha

Looool

chinnyonwu:
Sangò firre u!
I refused to comment on the guys action because that story is definitely edited (why did the guy all of a sudden, after 2 WHOLE YEARS start wanting a payback? )
but only a classless btich like you would refer to the guy money as "just" and refer to her as a victim and being "taken advantage of" after a guy has lied to his parents (she didnt take advantage of his friendship here abi) to obtain the amount (which i am pretty sure is huge -notice OP left it out of her tale)
You collected money that you couldnt collect from your parents from a guy and when he asks for it in cash or kind, you look for a way to remain a "victor" instead of rallying his money in order to protect your dignity.
It's also people like you i love to fccuk like a donkey with my tiny dick then dump.
May Thor use his hammer to smash your little brain to pieces! Amen
U dont deserve to breathe one more second on this lovely earth.

*yawn* save ur gist for someone who is interested. And the whole, "may thor use his hammer....." crap is just old and so not funny. someone obviously deceived u that it was funny. Yeye sombori!!!

I just pity the one in 500 level. Ur almost done and u wr caught stealing. Hian! E b like say him project no b beans. He still has tym to b stealing. All dez boys sha. Shey dey have suddenly forgotten aluu4?

The other one's prick looks like a roasted and burnt baby rat.

LMFAOOOOOOO
Y evuls?!! Chai! Pray no one says ur prick looks like burnt baby rat ooo. Lwkmd!!!

chinnyonwu:
May Thor use his hammer to smash your tiny brain into pieces!
If it was "just" why couldnt she help herself? Ole


God bless you.

Anyway, OP, i feel theres more to this story than you disclosed.

Oponu oshi! It's guys like u she's referring to. Thinking with ur third leg, Wich I'm priti sure is real tiny. I wish guys can put themselves in our shoes. But of course, they can never b victims. Mstcheeeewwww

hbpeze:
All I know is that if a woman is not a Virgin on a wedding day she uselessed herself and the man is marrying a spare part

Don't be silly. What if she was raped? U can't just conclude any woman who isn't a virgin by the tym she's married means she uselessed herself. Think before u make statements abeg

MadCow1:
[b]One guy just dey one corner dey wait dem to grow up make ehn file their Congo. .




I go lock my daughter inside house until she turn 30 [/]

Oh pls! Don't be a Hypocrite by doing wat u won't want ur parents doing to u, if ur a gal.

FriedPlantain:
Has nothing to with God or any supernatural being anywhere, it was a near- miss incident and the dude was just plain lucky. We should be more concerned about what stringent safety measures that should be put in place and enforced to curtail similar occurrence from happening rather than focusing on how some supernatural being helped the dude escape unscathed in the accident. At least that is how it is done in saner climes.

Lmao!

boniflex:
I still remember IVA, FOOL MOON, AKIDI, VUGA and SAMADORA

My dear, it's "FULL" moon.

MEILYN:
Guy na wa for you ooo. Come try this one for Okokomaiko wey boys eyes dey red. As you faint, person go even enter the line wey you dey before, them go order security to put you for chair, blow you breeze and pour you water.

When you wake up, e go surprise you say you go still join the queue.

Lmao!!!

tellwisdom:
Anuofia

LMFAO

tellwisdom:
Ur papa dey mad. Pls tell him I said so. Omo ale jati jati

U r pained. Go take ur drugs. I c u skipped ur medication. Yeye sombori

tellwisdom:
Which restaurant is this??

Seriously?! Y r u such a dvmbass? Since when did restaurants have bedrooms and living rooms in them? Or the restaurants in your village r that posh?

EroticAngelina:
I've never been to a church where the pastor or person preaching doesn't shout..

Does the shouting make the blessing more effective or what?? go abroad, ull never see a pastor literally screaming in ur ears thru the speakers

I want to know why it is so.

I wonder oh. Anoda one that pisses me off is wen they shout while praying. As if God is deaf. Not cool mehn.

Hian! Am I the only one tired of all these news of missing planes? Shey dem pilots dunno dey shud stop flying over Bermuda triangle?! Mstcheeeewwww. Anyway, I hope they find the missing people sha. That's "IF" they r rili missing.

Happy birthday to this awesome footballer. He has a very beautiful family!

Okeke u ever heard of "strength of a woman women"?

U forgot to correct 'women' abi is der any such thing as strength of a women?

ayusco85:
Did it worked?

Really? Wat kind of yeye tabon is dis nau?

Sabrwahaqqo:
U should have kept it secret anyway. A rapist might be reading this, who knows?

True talk my broda

Andyblaze:
[b]flashback
i rememba wen i was in secondary skul,i was in ss2.i
am a bad boy i always go out during skul period 2 av
fun wit my frndz,we always drink palmwine nd bush
meat or we wil go 2 playstation 2 gamble.dis is hw dis
act continue until 1 day we were caught,we were
punished by d skul authority nd we were also given
suspension,my parents av 2 change my skul bcoz my
skul is a private skul buh d students always behave
lyk a public skul students lyk dey always beat d
teachers nd av turn 2 a bad boy nd i was taken 2 a
xtian private skul xo dat i can change.in dis skul der
ar alot of rules 2 follow lyk dnt bring ur fone 2
skul,student shldnt date themselves nd other.wen i
get 2 dis skul i hated myself 4 cumin der,xo i start
makin frndz buh der is dis gal she is dark in
complextion,nt 2 fat nd nt 2 tall,i lyk goin 2 har seat 2
chat wit ha wen we ar in free periods nd during
breaks.we always talk alot buh her seat partner who
is a boy hate me bcoz i always cum 2 der seat nd he
always scold me nt 2 cum again.xo i later yield 2 his
words.xo i stop goin 2 der seat buh i tink dis gal av
crush on me bcoz we i stop goin 2 ha seat he start
cumin 2 my seat nd we always study,chat nd play
2geda.xo 1 fateful day i told ha all my feelings dat i
luv ha dat she is my 1st luv nd dat she has change me
completely,i alxo told ha my past dat am once a bad
boy buh we i met ha she has change me completey
xo she said she wil tink abt it nd she wil giv me d
ansa d next day.d next she said she alxo luv me buh
she has dated 3 guys b4 me buh dey always break
her heart,i ansa dat i wil neva do dat.we start dating
dat day nd we always kiss buh d day i want2 av sex
wit her she said she is a virgin dat if i disvirgin her
wont i stp loving her,i said no.buh dat day ha luv av
taken ova my heart wen she tel me dat she is a virgin
buh i didnt disvirgin because i respect ha 4 kipin ha self
nd i dnt want2 spoil her life,am also a virgin.afta a
month of dating d skul authority find out abt us xo
dey decided 2 punish us buh i took al d blame dat she
knew ntin abt it dat am d one dat is forcing ha 2 be
my gf buh she always decline xo i was only
punished.later we agreed 2 end d relationship buh
we ar stil gud frnds buh i learnt dat weneva am
chating wit a female student or playin d gal always
get jealous nd vice versa afta graduating we lost
contant nd afta 2 years she saw my numba on fb nd
we start talkin bak nd i stil luv ha because i always tink
abt ha wen we lost contant.am nw a 100 level student
in a state uni wen she is in 200 level in a private
uni.wen she 1st call me she said she love me dat she
wants 2 date me buh she wont tel me ha real
name.she always send me luv msgs buh i said my
heart is wit anoda gal dat d gal is my 1st love xo i cnt
date her.she later reveil her self xo we bcame frndz
again.dos tym wen we lost contant i dated 2 gal buh
wen i want2 av sex wit d gals i always rememba wen i
want2 av sex wit my 1st luv xo i wil stp because she has
taken ova my thought nd d galz always complain buh
i wont ansa dem,i was dating a gal wen i later met my
1st luv xo i broke up wit d gal bcoz i av find my heart
desire.we bcam frndz again we always chat on
whatspp nd i ask ha out again buh she frnd zone me,i
ask her if she av a bf buh she said no xo i told ha all
wat has happened 2 me wen we lost contant dat i stil
luv ha dat i wil anytin 4 her buh she stil say no.buh
she always disturb me wit calls,i later ignore her calls
4 abt a week she send alot of msg 2 me dat she has
missed me dat i shld pick ha kal or she wil fall sick xo
i pick ha call,she always send me money nd airtime
wen am in need.one day were chatting on whatsapp
nd ask her dat is she stil a virgin she said no.dat she
has did it 3 times wit her ex.all d respect dat i av 4
her stp dat day buh d probelm is dat i stil love ha nd
am stil a virgin weneva i want2 av sex i always
rememba wen she told me dat she is a virgin nd i wil
stp d act.d problem is dat am lukin 4 a way 2 stp
loving ha pls palz help me out
[/b]


#BITG

MSTCHEEEEWWWW. Stupid thread!!!

MrKontrovErsy:
this is barbaric
is a pity some animals wear homa skin

Homa?