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Nairaland Forum / Femiero's Profile / Femiero's Posts
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Crime / Re: 'I Bought Fake Naira Notes From Alaba Market' by femiero: 10:07am On Sep 10, 2013 |
If them deport this 1 now, them go begin shout again.[color=#990000][/color] 1 Like |
Phones / Re: Smartphones by femiero: 8:30pm On Sep 08, 2013 |
Smart phones can do some or all ofthe following things: Surf the internet Cook Plug itself to a socket when the battery is low Drive a car Run errands And most of all act as a body guard when you are attacked both physically and spiritually Eg Samsung Galaxy S4, Blackberry Porsche design etc |
TV/Movies / Re: The Day They Came (A Short Sci-fi Film) by femiero: 7:15pm On Sep 08, 2013 |
genetos: Thanks yall, I spent only 200 naira on the film which was use to buy the pack of cigarette nd lighter Very nice. I bet say na white london you buy. Benson and Hedges na N200 without the lighter. |
Celebrities / Re: Eedris Abdulkareem Insults Cossy Orjiakor On Twitter by femiero: 5:14pm On Sep 08, 2013 |
It's hoe-k. |
Politics / Re: Landslide Kills 9 People In Calabar by femiero: 10:30am On Sep 06, 2013 |
Ah. RIP to those involved. But this event has the trappings of an odosiferous end time tinz saga! |
Family / Re: Toddler Walked-Out Of Nursery To Her Home After Door Was Left Open by femiero: 9:43am On Sep 06, 2013 |
Geeez! Somebody is going to loose his job. And she's a very smart baby though. ETT 1 Like |
Politics / Re: Landslide Kills 9 People In Calabar by femiero: 9:31am On Sep 06, 2013 |
This is serious oo. End time tinz. |
Fashion / Re: 25 Hairstyles Of The Last 100 Years by femiero: 7:28am On Sep 06, 2013 |
Space booked |
Jokes Etc / The Law Is An Ass. You Will Believe After Reading This. by femiero: 8:10am On Sep 03, 2013 |
These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place. ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?' ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! _______________________________ ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth? WITNESS: July 18th. ATTORNEY: What year? WITNESS: Every year. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you? WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which. ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you? WITNESS: Forty-five years. _________________________________ ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget.. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ____________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: He's 20, much like your IQ. ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you shitting me? _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Getting laid ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: She had three children , right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death.. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Take a guess. ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral... _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished. _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question? ______________________________________ And last: ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No.. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law. 2 Likes |
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: Do Footballers And Sportmen Deserve Higher Wage by femiero: 12:31pm On Sep 01, 2013 |
Your wage/salary is dependent on how the society values your services. Millions of people all over the world see football as an entertaining sport, thus there is a huge remunerations for the footballers. But don't let ASUU know footballers earn that much oo. They may never calloff the strike oo 34 Likes |
Religion / Re: I Am A Babalawo - An Exclusive Interview With Prof. Wande Abimbola by femiero: 11:50am On Sep 01, 2013 |
FortresOfChrist: The LORD of lords is calling you today. Christ the Lord of glory bless you soul with salvation. Later you will start showing your female members a new level of grace. Ifa worshippers don't do that. So STFU! 1 Like |
Religion / Re: Ese Walter Releases Affair Evidence With Pastor BiodunTo Respected Minister by femiero: 12:48pm On Aug 31, 2013 |
rozayx5: Another shameless move from Ese You are very stooooopid. Why must the adultrous celebrity pastor make a move on a girl in the first place? 2 Likes |
Nairaland / General / Re: Famous Lies We Tell by femiero: 8:38am On Aug 31, 2013 |
Banana Island k.style: |
Romance / Marriage Application Form by femiero: 8:08am On Aug 25, 2013 |
APPLICATION FORM TO MARRY MY DAUGHTER FILL THE FORM IN OWN HAND WRITTING AND IN BLOCK LETTERS I _______________ hereby apply to marry your daughter Ma I am _____ years old {Please answer the following questions honestly} 1. Do you go to church? Yes/No 2. Do you have a degree or diploma? Yes/No 3. Are you still a virgin? Yes/No 4. Are you working? Yes/No 5. Do you have a car? Yes/No {If your answer to any of the above questions was NO Do not continue. Leave my house and don't look back If all your answers were YES, Then continue} 1. In 50 words or more, Describe the disadvantages of cheating in marriage _______________________________________ 2. With the aid of a diagram, Explain how you can give respect to your father in-law/mother in-law 3. Suppose your wife says "Honey I need money for my hair-style at the saloon", what would you answer? _______________________________________ 4. Explain any TEN causes of divorce__________________________________ 5. What does the term 'good husband' mean to you? ____________________________________ 5.b. How many times do you intend to have sex daily_________ Weekly____________ Momthly_____________ 6. Do you have both dad and mum? Yes/No If No explain why? 7.Were your parents legally married? Yes/No If YES for how long? If the time of their marriage is less than your age, Explain why you were born out of wedlock 8. Explain the meaning of ''COME HOME EARLY" As used by women (100 words) 9. Give any THREE reasons that can cause a man to sleep outside his house 10. In case of divorce, Who do you think is the owner of the kids between father and mother? { Answer the following by Yes or No} 1. Do you drink alcohol? Yes/No 2. Do you smoke? Yes/No 3. Are you short-tempered? Yes/No LAST PART - BUT EQUALLY IMPORTANT 1. When can you be free for interviews?___________________________________ 2. When is the best time to interview your dad? ____________________________________ 3. When can I interview your mum? _______________________________________ 4. When can I interview your church pastor 5. Please stick your passport size photo below Which will be put in newspaper to check if you have other girlfriends Sign here: ___________ Sign again: __________ Thank you for showing interest in my daughter. Your application will be processed in 4years time. You will be acknowledged only if you emerge successful. As you are waiting:- Please don't call me Don't visit me Don't contact my daughter If u do you will be disqualified Leave your details in case I need to ask you more questions Postal Address: ______________________ Email: ______________________ Phone: ______________________ Facebook: ______________________ |
Celebrities / Re: OJB Jezreel Departs For His Surgery In India by femiero: 10:47am On Aug 24, 2013 |
This OJB guys sef! No be scam be this? He claimed to have 8 weeks to live 4 months ago and he said the surgery was going to be in UK that's was why it was expensive. He don blackmail him colleagues collect money now he run go India go do cheap surgery |
Politics / Re: Soludo Loses Bid To Reverse Disqualification As APGA Guber Aspirant by femiero: 10:37am On Aug 24, 2013 |
Chief Andy Uba all the way! 1 Like |
Education / Re: FG Can't Meet With ASUU Demands - Okonjo-Iweala by femiero: 10:49pm On Aug 13, 2013 |
lanrexdo: What infrastructure is needed to earn a Ph.D degree in a Nigerian university? Didn't these same institutions graduated students last year? Has the facilities used suddenly disappeared this year? ASUU members are greedy snakes. They don't see students as their products. Visit car parks in these schs especially federal schs and you will think its an automart yet these lazyy buffoons want more money? Na wa oo 2 Likes |
Education / Re: FG Can't Meet With ASUU Demands - Okonjo-Iweala by femiero: 10:30pm On Aug 13, 2013 |
Osgilliat: Restructuring finances my ass..while your entire family graduated from harvard. A bill should be passed to restrict all this politician children from schooling abroad and home base private universities, I bet they will not only throw chairs at such person but also kill him. Bunch of b.i.t.c.h.e.s. spit on thread and walk away. You are just as foolish as you sound. Why you no go Havard? Your papa fit afford am? 2 Likes |
Politics / Re: Rivers State Assembly Crises - The Complete Videos by femiero: 6:24am On Jul 10, 2013 |
that's guv Rotimi Amaechi egift: Who is the man in white? |
Politics / Re: Amaechi Is Already With APC - Rivers PDP by femiero: 8:37am On Jul 05, 2013 |
omenka: Try to ask your father how many times he does it in a day at work. The answer will surprise you |
Celebrities / Re: OJB Cries As P-Square Donates N5Million For His Kidney Transplant by femiero: 8:07am On Jun 30, 2013 |
Kidney transplant cost less than 3 milllion naira in Nigeria. OAUTHC has been doing kindey transplants since 2010 with a 96% success rate. http://www.vanguardngr.com/2013/06/oauthc-introduces-affordable-kidney-transplant-dialysis/ This guy has gotten enough money already. Andyblaze: |
Celebrities / Re: Wizkid Buys Another Porsche? by femiero: 2:32pm On Jun 28, 2013 |
Is OJB is brother? You can't blackmail anybody to part with their hard earned money. Afterall, didn't OJB made money too? From all the donations so far, the guy don make over N40 million. No album. No record sales. val_dubem: Let them keep buying porsche while OJB keeps breathing his last at the hospital. |
Celebrities / Re: Eniola Badmus's Outfit To A Tv Interview by femiero: 12:50am On Jun 24, 2013 |
Swaggzkid: Gbo gbo big girls outfit to a tv interview. she looks like a moonpig |
Religion / Re: Redeem Church Acquires Camp In The USA by femiero: 1:04pm On Jun 23, 2013 |
[size=25pt][/size]This na big investment oo |
Nairaland / General / Re: Commuter Bus Drivers Protest In Ikoyi by femiero: 8:00pm On Jun 18, 2013 |
Sincere Bigot: o! i thought i saw 'computer bus' Garri don finish you!! |
Politics / Re: June 12 Annulment Was Payment For Abiola’s Evil Deeds – Sen Owie by femiero: 11:56am On Jun 12, 2013 |
Prof Corruption: Truth in an undiluted form. SO IBB is an agent of your god to dispense punishment. Where is the place of hellfire and all? |
Food / Re: Beans Lovers by femiero: 5:34pm On Jun 04, 2013 |
Ms_Steph: Beans favorite food(might sound strange) I like cooking it in different ways but I enjoy it most wit plantain. Share how you like your beans. The best way to enjoy beans is to add vegetables to it. Especially dried ones. Add weed/igbo/ganja.....and your life will never remain the same 1 Like |
Celebrities / Re: Most Hated Nigerian Celebrities by femiero: 6:53pm On May 29, 2013 |
Me I like Tonto Decay oooo lumeviews.com: |
Celebrities / Re: Tonto Dikeh With Her Dogs (Pictures) by femiero: 2:40am On May 29, 2013 |
Tonto Dike is pretty. But who is the young woman holding her neck? NessaFresh: Though we might often see the wild part of one of nigeria's top female celebrities, only an up,close and personal relationship could make you find out she has a very huge soft spot for dogs especially puppies. She owns two herself whom she treats like her own babies. She loves them upto the extent of letting them sleep with her at night atimes. |
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