What is Palmchat?? Is it Palm kernels chatting with themselves?

How much dem go pay you no be to get portal?

Una still dey do update whey the judges done hands off the matter.

Close this thread abeg make Jegede abi na zebrudaya go sleep

This Makarfi guy ugly ooooo see him teeth

Gworo done finish am ugly pdp chairman ugly wailers and supporters

This girl done reach 52 I swear.

kahal29:


Shee.. . Why rush to Buhari for him to intervene in a matter Wike and Fayose brought on you people? Is Buhari no longer the dictator? Is he now the Appeal Court abi Supreme Court?

2 virgin igbo girls for you my brother but if them I dey (most likely)
One sweet very well endowed afonja sweetheart for you

Largas:
One deaf Aboky felicitating with another aboky.

Mtcheew.

One leprous hardworking biafran wailing blue murder on a letter signed by the courageous, committed,incorruptible President of the greatest and most populous black nation in the world; Mohammadu Buhari GCFR


Do the needful if you don't like the letter jump inside River Niger

The Kwankwasiyya model, slayer of Badluck Ebele Jonathan, formidable APC godfather we love you sir.

Live on Dr while haters die

Jegede is a joke, Jimoh is a joker, Akeredolu is a sadist.
Oke the real deal.

Now wailers and flat heads can go to biafra and go and die

vena92:
Good Afternoon House,my name is Sam,please if anyone has a Bus or Taxi to give out on either Hire Purchase or Daily Delivery Basis,Please I am interested,link me up.
My Contacts;08130110390 or vena181092@gmail.com. Thank You.

...


Na so una dey be u dey form gentle now when you collect motor finish na story story and disappearing like ojuju calabar

UrennaNkoli:
I have a Peugeot 504 . It's not for sale but will serve as an antique.
In the next 40 years, I'll auction it for a few million bucks.

If those flat head mechanics in ladipo have dipped their hands in your classic and changed the engine my sister you no go see shishi

Big boy him confirm say hin be cabal clean mouth.

These hardworking Igbos make una carry am go court na

AngelAhnie:
You think sey na everybody poor like you?

Gerrrahia and go wash your dirty bum bum

Na lie jooor the greedy politician was probably expecting Chief of Staff or SSG.

Who born am to turn those down?
Na because na 1naira agency them give am

Shioooorrr

He died from stealing the common wealth of the people

UrennaNkoli:
When there is money, you have lesser barriers.

Their sex life will be limited by this height difference sha.

If that old man carry you enter the other room show you him "gbola" my sister you go beg taya.

Your yanshhhh won't live to tell the super story

Ogbeni Rauf Omo oduduwa to ni iwa bi.

notoriousbabe:
him mouth wide pass ashawo borehole

Gutter talk !
Come on boy Yes boy! be civil.
Real naija babes don't talk like this

R

Has Pa Chook-idi been heckled away from nairaland with his bombastic ideas

What is Lalasticlala waiting for.

My friend move this hot potato to permanent site

hungryboy:
na dis kind thing we dey take sabi people were dey stay for village,
So anybody were no follow you clap on top your e fight topics na igbo now?,
Abi dem no teach you for school say Nigeria get over 200 tribes,
Igbo and Yoruba na just two of them

I dey stay village you dey Malaysia and India dey do 419 and carry coco

hungryboy:
oga you just learn the English?,
Guilty conscience say na my picture dey dia so?
Go find work do leave hustling for frontpage,
E no dey pay

E pain omoo yheeebooo

Afriifa:
Biafra in Progress!

I dey tell you

hungryboy:
which territory?,
Lalasticla, this thread should be left to rot here

Why e dey pain you nah ?
Guilty conscience abi

Lalasticlala

Lalasticlala please move to the right territory

Two Nigerian men were arrested on Friday, September 30th by a joint team of Delhi and Goa Police for cheating several people after befriending them on social networking sites.

The suspects identified as Chukwuma Collins, 35, and Nicodemus Obinn, 27, used to befriend people on Facebook and then ask for money to send "necessary items" to their family members in UK.

Police said that the two used to cook up stories about the poor conditions of their family members living in western countries and ask the victims to help them with money. After receiving the money they broke all contact with the victims. Both have been involved in several cases of fraud and an FIR was registered against them in Goa cyber crime cell.

Bridget Fernandes Rai, a victim made a complaint to Goa Police, claiming to have been cheated of around Rs 8 lakh by the duo. She said that she had befriended Collins on Facebook and after a few days of chatting he started calling her.

Rai told the police that Collins started referring to her as his sister and asked for Rs 8 lakh to transfer some money and jewellery through a courier to his relatives. He claimed that the courier was stuck in legal processes at the customs department in Goa and he needed to get it delivered quickly as his wife had expired.

Rai agreed to transfer the money to his account. As soon as the money was transferred, Collins disappeared. After some time, Bridget received a call from the custom department, which raised questions regarding the parcel she had sent, and realised that she was duped.

"A team from Goa Police approached us in Delhi after a technical surveillance pointed to role of some people operating from here. A joint team was formed to track the accused. The duo was arrested from Mahavir Enclave in south Delhi," said Ravindra Yadav, joint commissioner, crime.

Collins and Obinn confessed to their crime and disclosed that they had cheated several others in a similar way. Three laptops, seven data cards, 36 SIM cards and 26 mobile phones, three USB pen drives, were recovered from the duo.

During interrogation, the duo claimed that they had arrived in India five years ago for business and then started cheating people using different techniques. Both accused were produced in a Dwarka court and taken on a transit remand by Goa Police.

Source: Times of India

Dear Dr my blokos is bent. That really cracked me

Farting is the emission of wind from the anus. In ordinary English, it is commonly used in relation to flatulence and is often considered undesirable in formal situations where many would consider it offensive and demeaning. It comes from an old English word, Feortan, which means to “to break wind.” Many people have considered whether farting can carry bacteria and therefore cause infections. In a classical experiment conducted in Australia, it was found that fart released at a distance of five centimetres did not grow any bacteria with the trousers worn but did so when the clothes were taken off by a member of the experimenting team. It therefore follows that the clothes we wear act as a filter for the gas we produce from the anus.

The act of farting means so many things to different people. Among children up to the mid-teens, it is a playful thing. Some children fart when people are gathered for the most telling effect, usually out of mischief. Others do theirs in some form of competition to determine whose fart smell the most. And it is a lively game especially among male teens. Among younger children, it is fun; they pass out the offensive sound and giggle mischievously while announcing, never mind the English: “I mess.” Among some of the major tribes in Nigeria, farting in private or in public demands not scorn or disrespect, but a greeting to acknowledge your sympathy and also to commend them for having rid their system of a poisonous disease. It is very interesting because these people are not alone. In ancient Japan, it was considered an offense to hold the fart in. As a result, people were encouraged to pollute the air as they wished so as to remain healthy. In ancient Rome, Emperor Claudius promulgated a decree making it an offense for people to hold their fart.

The activity of gut bacteria, those gram negative organisms that help us break down our foods are responsible for splitting off both methane gas and sulphites from those foods. The protein dishes are more likely to produce these gases than carbohydrates and fats, but that is only at the initial time of exposure to such foods. As time goes on, perhaps the bacteria in the intestine also adjust their mechanisms and the same composition of fart is produced no matter what is eaten. That said, it is important for you to believe that only about one per cent of all farts actually smell badly. We all fart in our sleep and do so frequently during the night. Seldom does it happen that someone sleeping in the same room is awoken by the offensive smell. Farts from females smell more badly than those from males. The reasons are unclear and it does go against conventional wisdom. But their fart is known to contain more hydrogen sulphide than that of males. Also, it is usually less voluminous. During any 24 hour period, the average person farts about 14 times and the volume is sufficient to fill a standard balloon fully.

Farting is not always a nuisance. Some people are sexually attracted to each other by farting and may use it to communicate in the privacy of their bedrooms. Such people are described as suffering from a condition known as ‘Eproctophilia,’ a psychiatric condition. Some species of fish also do this; the female fish use this as a sign to the male fish that they are available for mating! More seriously though, in another reality experiment shown in “One thousand ways to die,” a man chose to fart into a naked fire many hours after a meal rich in meat and eggs. The wind caught fire and his buttocks were badly burnt. He had to be rushed to an emergency room. And over a span of 10 years, it was noted that there were some 20 colonoscopies from around the world where an explosion occurred. This is a risk when the bowel is poorly prepared or not prepared at all. When a surgical diathermy is therefore introduced into such an intestine in the course of treating a lesion, a mixture of oxygen, methane, hydrogen and nitrogen respond to the naked flame and an explosion occurs. It is like placing a small bomb within a person’s body and death can result.



Farting produces some nearly indescribable relief. Many people would release theirs at a place where they consider it to be socially acceptable such as a rest room or while defecating. Others would do so in the open when they take a look around them and no one is near. Some would aid the quick emission of the gas by partly parting the buttocks. Occasionally, it is accidentally released when a person laughs really hard or when they accidentally, unexpectedly, lose their footing. In most instances, everyone knows instinctively when their rectum (this lies above the anus) is under pressure and needs relief. The decision whether to let what distends it to come out of the body is a conscious one and is regulated by an external sphincter which individuals learn to control from as early as the age of two.

The precise mechanism by which the anus and the rectum determine whether it is stool or gas is poorly understood because people do not usually make the mistake of releasing stool when all they want is to release a fart. One just knows and does what is required at a time of their choosing. It is one of the most remarkable things that occur in nature. The nerves within that part of the body are able to separate one from the other and relay that important information to the brain. The brain then activates the other senses to help clarify that the circumstances are favourable or acceptable to let the farting take place. The external sphincter is therefore released and the gas escapes.

When a person is unable to fart for several days, some serious disease is developing within the intestine. Often, it will mean there is a blockage to the flow of faeces and gas. The effects are telling as the abdomen will begin to swell and can hinder the person’s ability to breathe. Only desperate measures taken can then save life. These may involve the deployment of medications and appliances to overcome the problem or a major operation to bypass it.

Ask the doctor

Dear doctor, I have a friend that was recently admitted at a hospital for attempting suicide. In January this year, she did a test for HIV and was found to be negative. Then a week ago at their church clinic, a health programme was held during which she was tested for HIV and she was said to be positive. Yesterday, she was found unconscious in her room with an empty bottle of some substance on the floor. My question is “is it possible for it to happen like this and just change from negative to positive? 080343xxxxx

Such a change can occur not because either of the results is wrong but because any such tests conducted is valid for only six months. However, a positive test obtained in such a forum, as you depicted, is only a screening test and cannot be taken as a valid result until a confirmatory test is done. A confirmatory test is a more exhaustive test, more expensive and far more accurate. When a positive result is obtained from that, then the person is likely to be positive. Nothing is proven until that is done. It is sad that she attempted to kill herself on account of that test. It is not a death sentence even if confirmed.

Dear doctor, please what causes a 17-year-old girl to still wet the bed? 081660xxxxx

That is often a difficult answer to give. The causes vary greatly as follows;

1) disharmony in the home

2) a bladder infection

3) diabetes mellitus

4) spinal cord injury or disease

5) a problem called a neurogenic bladder.

We have previously dealt with this topic about two years ago (you can check the online version to access that essay). There are no easy answers and you will need to see your doctor for a detailed examination essentially to be certain whether any of the factors above is responsible.

Dear doctor, my friend wants to know what is responsible for what he is presently passing through — mouth odour. Each time he eats beans, garri, rice, bread, the trouble of bad breath sets in. If he takes oats, fish and soup without garri, he will be okay. Now, the question is, “should he stay away from the above foods or is there any cure for it?” Please let us know. 080326xxxxx

I do not believe his food is responsible for what he is now undergoing. Beans and fish are very similar. Rice is also similar to oats and bread. Soup, depending on the composition is more likely to cause an offensive breath whether it is taken with garri or not. Also, I am certain that his diet is more extensive than the few examples you have divulged above. Nonetheless, I do think he should see a dentist for a comprehensive examination of his mouth and teeth. If something is amiss there, they will treat him for it. And if nothing obvious is evident, he would probably be asked to see an Ear, Nose and Throat surgeon for further examination. His eventual treatment will depend on the cause.

Dear doctor, I am 18 years old. I have not done anything with men in my life but my friends always say that if I want to know whether I am a virgin or not, I should put one finger into my vagina and if it enters, that means I am not a virgin. Please how can I know for sure that I am a virgin? 070357xxxxx

There are two things at play here: if you have done nothing before with any man, why bother whether you are a virgin or not? If you must know, however, the best option is to have a doctor or a nurse examine you and help you determine that fact. Inserting your finger does not actually tell you much and you could hurt yourself. You could have a tiny finger that would pass through the hymen even though you were a virgin and that would be hugely misleading. Take the steps I have asked you to and you will be satisfied.

Dear doctor, please help me because my penis is bent and I have premature ejaculation. 090587xxxxx

Not every penis is straight. Quite a number are bent. It depends on by how much though. As for premature ejaculation, that is a problem faced by many men. Training and mental toughness can help you overcome that. However, if there is no improvement despite your best efforts, then see your doctor.

Dear doctor, I had an eye operation about nine months ago for glaucoma. After the operation, I was placed on eye drops and some medicines and I was fine for a long time. In the past four weeks, I have suffered constant headaches around my forehead and tears stream down from the operated right eye. I am not able to sleep. What do I do? Is it another operation or what do you think is wrong this time? 080831xxxxx

I sympathise with you. Repeat operations are usually harder than the first attempts. I believe you should see your doctor for a re-assessment of your vision. Following such an operation, it is common to have prescription glasses in addition to the medications you mentioned. You did not comment about that, so that aspect may require some looking into. I am certain that if you follow that path, a solution will be found to your current problems and you will be able to sleep normally.

Dear doctor, I have often heard of women who through operation, ceased to have a womb but still went ahead to get pregnant. Is this medically possible sir? If so, where can somebody have this kind of treatment? 081304xxxxx

Your question is valid. I know of no such centres where that kind of treatment is obtainable, certainly not within our shores. I have also heard such stories, but I want to say that they are faith-based testimonies, not medically validated facts. That is not to say it is impossible. Last year in Sweden, a woman received a transplant of a womb with which she eventually got pregnant and was delivered of a baby. This is an expensive, laborious undertaking that is still a long way off from being available to the average woman


http://punchng.com/the-relief-of-farting/

No be this dude dey. Like play gangster. For movies?? Him say him wan go Hollywood. Hahahahahaha person whey. Never. Shine for ordinary Hollywood

Even Omotola never dream Hollywood an Isuzu abi na. Azundu wan go

HRich:
The police have arrested a United States of America (USA)-
based businessman, #Uzoukwu #George, for allegedly obtaining
N7 million from a couple under false pretence

Gbam