₦airaland Forum

CharleyBright:
My dear brother, I will tell you the honest truth straight forwardly because you asked a sincere question.

Firstly, let me make you understand that the fact that she didn't marry you should not make you feel bitter about her.
For everyone, God had created someone for him/ her by reason of destiny. If you didn't marry her, she was not the person God destined for you. Both of your only crossed paths for a purpose.

Secondly, there is absolutely nothing wrong in helping your Ex if she is in need and reaches out to you OR you feel led to do so.
Life is meant to be such that we can help one another. Today you help her, tomorrow it might be she helping you or your children.
Besides, why would you deny her help if she is in need and a said you truly loved her? Are you still feeling hurt and want vengeance?
That is not needful. Render help to the needy and consider it that you are doing it for God and sowing a seed.
.
Would you deny someone in need of water a drink?
Would you prefer to make contribution for her burial (God forbid) than to give financial assistance while she is alive ?
Finally, my candid advise for you is reach out to her and give the help if you can

First of all, if you married and just wake up one day, your wife opens provision store which is not a proceed from her own savings, neither is it urs, or any member of u or her own family, after details enquiry you find out that, her ex was the one opens it, how will you feel?

Apart from above scenario, with the way she left, she doesn't deserve this type of assistance from ex, though, if you know your value as a man. Let say, OP is in "life and death" situation, not even provision stuff o, did you think the girl will even call? Let alone assist? In fact, she will deny him outrightly.

3rd, the way you reasoning, is reason why women having "entitlement mentality" going into relationship, they have it in their mind, men are cheap, if I just flash him, he would forget whatever atrocities I committed, he must return the call and start doing my biddings.

Last not the least. I'm very sure OP has more than 50 people around him, family or friends that need assistance like this, can he assist any one of them? If no, he is nothing but a fool.

Know that there is clear differences foolishness & kindness, it will sharpen your life going forward.

Namaster:
You sound like someone who has LOST 2 things:

1. Your DIGNITY.
2. Your MIND.

The breakup was NOT amicable.
You did NOT go your separate ways because of irreconcilable differences.

She DUMPED you the moment she met ANOTHER man who was ready to marry her.
She DUMPED you without a second a thought.

She DUMPED you for ANOTHER man.

And for THREE years, she did NOT reach out to you.
But the moment she needs MONEY, she remembered the MOOOGOOO that used to FAWN over her.

This woman wants money from YOU that the man she LEFT you for CANNOT provide.

And instead of REVELING in the KARMIC nature of the situation, you are here MULLING the idea of actually GIVING her the money.

Absolute MADNESS!

I hardly like comment but force to like your comment, there is difference between act of kindness and act of foolishness, but this one chooses act of foolishness.

I'm very sure if reverse is the case, if the lady's husband is very rich and with high statu, if she accidentally meets OP who is poor and low status, she won't even greet, and if OP try to near, she will deny him outrightly.

mukthar2000:
Nothing than money

The money that Wen it finally comes, the wife that has been with you through out the time of adversity will become like flirty rag?

Man must bring excuse to escape blames, it started from time of Adam and Eve.

Emeskhalifa:
Fact

Experiencing it currently. After a hectic, chaotic day and preparing to go face the next day, where person wan see time and feelings for za oza room?

Someone who is not up to you, even in the area of financial capacity you are complaining of, will be helping your inadequacy in Oza room, my opinion is bitter but it's a fact!

Wen you are 24-27, ladies should endeavour to lower their guard and marry guys that available, many of the type of man lady admire to marry are unrealistic.

When you cross 30, it becomes a mountain prayer for you to even marry lesser man you dream, is it not the same Naija where guy struggling to feed his own mouth?

How many guys working in CBN, NNPC, revenue services or medical doctors etc?

If 90% of mature ladies run after 5% of rich guys, this is outcome of such crazy action.

Back to your main problem. Since you didn't realise you came to this world and fulfil in all ramifications, career, marital, financial etc, you should leave with your singleness till thy kingdom. Did anybody suppose remind you Wen to start procreating not even women with biological time.

emmaodet:
I think the past experience of their mothers, grandmothers is what is making them to be more ruthless in their choices else, they will fall into the same pit.
Let's be frank, so many men out there are nothing to write home about.
They are very very irresponsible who just want to bang, no support for the woman's kids or pregnancy or upkeep.
Do you expect such men to procreate? And cause more wahala for us?

First person from the very first comment who is not bias, but also talking like person which his brain still intact.

Not until we men, know that, the monster we created out of women will surely find its way to wherever we run to.

The same guys here on nairaland who are cherishing and saying all sorts of thrash they are doing with drugs and also their sex escapades with different women, from gfs to olosho and even jumping from one brothels to another, will also be the first to come online and wail endlessly for ladies who are wayward.

Every guy wants to sleep with thousands of different girls and at same time, all of them want virgin as wife. What an absurd!

Pierocash:


So even my fellow gender dey gold dig too. I think say nah only women be gold diggers.

Marrying autistic woman, how you go dey take kiss am. Who go cook, who go take care of the house.

My gender, I hail thee.

Apostle should set up cbt exam to determine the winner

Maybe you will start reasoning and commenting rationally and devoid of prejudice towards any gender henceforth, that, particular behaviour is not restricted to specific gender in same society.

I imagine what you would have labelled female gender, because of that woman that married to autistic boy few days ago, and to make it worse, those who applied in Ur gender far-far outnumbered female gender.


Women don't know what they want

Women can do anything for money

That gender ehn etc

The best bet is Obi Kwankwaso in 2027, but they won't win but to build up for 2031, for Kwankwaso vs one strong south east politician.

Bayern Munich vs Atletico Madrid.


Very unfortunately Trouphl-ess FC already exhausted at very critical stage, and drought continues!

Even if BB travels to every nation including ICC headquarters, who will arrest him?

If they are deceiving you,pls stop deceiving yourself.

DatIgalaDude:
I open NL to read news but na breast matter I dey see.
God abeg!

If you want to read news, go to sites like BBC, CNN, punch, vanguard etc, even in such news outlets, they still discuss intimacy and relationship in their columns.

Societies are badly damaged today, because everyone wants only what he has interest in and angry for what they don't have interest in, they forget to come to realisation that, God created humans to have diverse of "wants and desires".

People will just rise up and be at war with "their own very self", .....last last 6 feet will finally be the end of everybody.


Still doesn't know how this one will have peaceful relationship/marriage, even if she ends up with most humble man in the universe. Her orientation is something else.

At peak Mane Osinmeh Salah.

At present Semanyo Osinmeh Salah.

DeltaBachelor:
Some of them are past their prime, but if you say we should assume everyone on the list is at their peak, then I will go for Sallah, Mane and Aboubakar. Sorry, I am not patriotic. I am realistic. If I want to win, that’s my front line. E get why o !

You are not realistic but delusional, removing Osinmeh for Aboubakah, makes you incompetent as a coach.........wen both are are at peak.

amaridigital:
Israel doesn't have to talk. Israel should go and invade North Korea.
The guy said he had it and he has been begging Trump and netan-yahoo for the past one month to come and attack him. Why are they afraid? Washington will get an unexpected supernova visitor this evening that will take away 20 million people with it.
The big mouth of white house and house boy in Jerusalem, Are they afraid of kim? Don't they want a nuclear free world again?
Please Trump go and attack kim. Is it only Jesus and the Pope you can abuse? Please try and abuse kim we want to check something?

The head of atomic agency saying not yet having it, you that never leave zoo saying otherwise,also inviting enermy to strike small boy of NK, keep on hyping efufulele until USA & Isreal wake up from their slumber and remember him. Perhaps, after Iran the next victim on their menu Is North Korea or Nigeria.

Why can you express your mind for him wen two of you are alone inside the room, probably on your matrimonial bed?


I pray you won't won't allow enermy of marriage that full over social media to help you scatter your beautiful marriage.

Waiting for you to report to social media the kind of sex style he wants from you.

Marry someone who both of you have at least, 45% love and feelings for each other.

Treat your spouse the way you want your son/daughter to be treated in their marriages.

Husband and wife should endeavour to have stable incomes.

Marry someone who has fear of God.

Last but not the least. Be endeavour to be reaching compromise whenever conflict arises.

With these 5 attributes, 95% of marriages are guaranteed to be successful.

otipoju:
Marriage!!!

Only sweet if you are together with someone who is your friend. If you go marry woman wey no really send you and get hidden agenda,you go hear wheen.

What about married to a man with hidden agenda and who is not really love her wife?

Wotowotoman:
If you did not realize that it was pidgin I wrote in, you deserve a konk on that ya bald head

He who comes to equity must come with clean hands, I believe you know the meaning of the proverb.

Back to your defence, .....if you don't know the forum is not an official communication or thesis of academic presentations, where you expected to see foolproofed statements or presentations. "I laugh who no laughing you".

NB. Now that you write proper English language, you can check and see visible error in your comment....."it was pidgin I wrote in"

Wotowotoman:
Ogbeni, try buy Brighter Grammar to learn the difference between have and has

Mr jobless English professor, who assigned work for himself on faceless forum. Please check below, what Chartgpt says about your own error.

If they did it for a man in Aso Rock with criminal and inconsistency background, why not given same surport for another man in Olumo Rock.

After all, what is good for Goose must also good for Gander!

AsAbovesoBelow:
Her voice strong like okpa seller.. I find that very attractive though..

But to say u don't have any relationship, dats a lie...u probably chasing an already made importer/exporter...plus u didn't just arrive at 39, u passed through 25 to 38 believing that your punna only belongs to that man that can build your mother a house...on top something wey men dey get from normal 1500 sub.... Parents should stop that building house thing for them..population is already droping

Finally try to improve your presentation styles....learn various positions on the task...heads are heart openers apply with caution.

How many girls have you have relationship with since 10 yrs ago that ended in altar? Same go to ur all age mates who are guys, how many of you guys, stable enough economically to start having family? Infact, how many of you can feed yourself?

Walai:
Can someone explain to me how person go on ring light, open camera and then start crying, I just lost 2 and half brain cells trying to understand it

Why won't they? Since oyibo started paying every Tom and Jerry on social media for whatever they are doing, be it, comedy or seriousness, your bank accounts will fat.

How I wish Muslim can learn from this man, but wen the foundation is faulty what would future generations do? It has been foretold that Ishmael would grow up to become Bowman 🏹 and that, his descendants would become violence.

runningriot:
Trump's abnormalities and disfunctional behavior needs quick and urgent medical attention... I can sense someone is suffering from psychosis!

Didn't they notice same during his first, before mad people like him, overwhelming voted for him again.

They didn't want woman to rule but prefer lunatic that is disgracing them up and down, in addition to pains his giving them.

Sonnobax15:

This Pope,na wa for you oh

No wonder those Islamic terroirists will never stop taking Christians for granted. After all somebody like the Pope who's a well respected embodiment amongst Christians is busy asssslicking them

How many imams and sultans have come out to castigate the excesses of these Islamic terroirists openly?

If no Muslim conderm crimes of fellow Muslims, is that the reason pope should be surporting war? Is centre figure of Christian not different from islam?


If everyone drumming surport for wars? Will humanity won't wipe out one day?

It's easier to be in one corner of room where there is no war and be written, if you are to be in war torn society you will understand better.

You have access to internet and writing whatever pleases you here in Nigeria, just imagine yourself in Iran and no access to internet for more than a mouth.

Afriifa:
See as women no get choice. If you like go kill yourself. Even as a guy this fellow looks disgusting.

If man get choice, all those mad women on the street, they won't be impregnated by your gender.

I'm very sure supreme court will quickly deliver ADC case and allows Mark leadership to lead, they will do it wen Tinubu govt started receiving serious backlash from every corner.


Court has never been bastardise like this in the history of Nigeria, even in time of military. Wike and Tinubu have turn judiciary to puppet, they control at will.

For Kemi Badenoch to start lamenting about pampering kids to nonsense in UK, acknowledging that is not like that in Nigeria and Kenya, despite the fact, Nigeria too tilting towards pampering kids to stupidity, the way they are doing in western nation, I think it's becoming worrisome.

fyneboi79:
If im his boss at NASA I'll terminate his appointment with immediate effect...I won't tolerate such slowpoke behavior from a scientist.

Very unfortunately your wish will only remaining imagination, anyway, people with half-education need not to be listening to, whenever experts and great scientists are talking.

Only a mad man says there is no God!


If and expert in space & scientist could confess the wonders and existence of God, why should I listen to person with half-education?


Whenever I go into Chartgpt to learn about space and other celestial bodies, I trembling for magnificent of Almighty.