₦airaland Forum

princesa: before Nko? Na man go marry me na... But if him try nonsense, i go treat him f.uck up. Mi o ra ye s.hit mehn

Princesa... I don dislike you from today. You thought apologizing to you was because I fear your backlash?

Babe, come off it jor.

And remember, no matter how stubborn you are, you still moan under a man.

Damex333: Foxy_flow why u ed laugh! Many action film na serious one o.

If you sabi watch horror film, you go know say e get some parts wey dey funny die neh...

I relaxed as my leg came down slowly on the accelerator of the Prado jeep Alhaji had given to Captain Hakori and I to use. It had really been a tasky day but then I had completed all the drills like a robot. The whole process looked more like a dance step as I had mastered the technique. My vision was superb and aim clean. Everything had fallen in place but I still had four more days to complete my home based training before being shipped to Somalia.

I turned into the street, Dundari avenue, as it is called, slowed down at the end of the street and pointed the nose of the car at a black gate. I horned twice, the same black head with a skull cap peeped then disappeared. Soon he was pushing the giant gate open. I drove into the compound. I was really on time to see Gift hurry into the building. Our relationship had not been the greatest as we don't even converse. She acted like the daughter of the boss that she was and I acted like the bodyguard-in-training that I was.

"Attai the Attai"

Flow came out putting on a vest, his big chest looking at me menacingly. He was more built up than I was, probably because he had always been that way with the training shaping him up.

"Flow, Flowey"

I hailed back as I threw the car key to another driver who drove the car to the main park.

"See as you come back early today"

Flow said as we shook hand.

"O boy, na fly i been dey fly with the car na. Had it been fly pass front of the car, na murder the speed for murder am"

I said.

The rock5555: Good morning, pals. Thanks for folowing, more updates coming up later!!! Pls endeavour to comment as you read. Peace

Write first na... As long as I dey feel am, everybody dey feel am....

Madawaki01: Wetin dem dey train u for?hope we'r safe oo

When you reach there, you go know!!!

Bumper to bumper thingz oooo... I dey feel you die nehhhh

''Flow, you see as Alhaji nearly vex abi?''

I told Flow as we stood outside.

''That man no nearly vex. Im life na vex. I wonder how him carry dey stay with im Family.''

Flow concluded.

Flow was partially right. Even Engineer seemed to have picked up that trait from Alhaji. Force is nothing to go with when you want people to respect you. Alhaji always have this angry scowl on his face with his Osama looking beards not helping matters. His worlds always came out of his mouth forcefully.

''You guys should get busy!''

Alhaji's annoying voice, in fact, we had been tolerating his voice for a very long time. That same voice was right behind us. I turned and looked at Flow who had this 'I don't care' look on his face. I tried to do same but I thought of the one million and one things I wanted to use my money for. I tapped Flow on his hand and together we left where we stood.

''You dey form superman now, na where we dey go?''

Flow asked.

''Kitchen''

I replied curtly before smiling. My nose had picked up a stomach churning aroma. My hunger instinct kicked in. I was definitely going to get the food by all means possible.

''You know where the kitchen dey?''

Flow asked, oblivous of the aroma.

''When you hear the scent, you go know.''

I replied. My mouth was already salivating. Eggs being fried and bread being baked. I followed the trail of the smell with Flow right beside me having picked up the smell. At the extreme end of the right wing of the compound stood another building. As we got closer, we started hearing chattering.

''Those new boys go hear am here wey dem come so.''

One seemed to be saying.

''Not at all, them go survive.''

Another replied.

You know the feeling when you go for HIV test because you have been seeing syptoms. You are lean, your skin itchy and armpits sweaty. The doctor comes out, looks you in the face and tells you this word.

''I have good news and bad news for you.''

You are discombobulated. You don't know if to smile or frown.

''Tell me the good news first.''

You will say to him. He looks longingly at you then drops the bombshell.

''You are HIV negative.''

You rejoice then remember there is a bad news. You brace yourself up for it.

''But you have cancer and have 3 weeks to live.''

Imagine the delima. HIV doesn't kill you but you still have to die of cancer.

Such was the way we felt. If to take any of the words for it or just act like we never heard. I had my seperate thought.

''Ina kwanan ku?''

I and Flow greeted as we stepped in. My eyes bulged when I saw the amount of food on their table. Each person was devastaing a full loaf of bread with a plate filled with americanized eggs. Jugs were on each table which I believed were filled to the brim with rich tea. This I found out later to be the fact.

I swallowed hard. No wonder this guys were so big. If I and Flow should feed like this, then our st'upid ar'ses would be grounded.

''Lafiya''

They answered and proceeded to eat their food silently. I and Flow found a vacant table where we both sat down to eat the first real breakfast of our lives.

**********************************

''You have ten seconds to get that gun on that tree.''

Captain Hakori shouted to me. Hakori is an Hausa word for teeth. His real name was Clement, an officer of the Army. We changed his name the very first day because of the way his draculean teeth looked. The type we call ''caterpillar teeth''.

I and Flow had different trainers and we trained in different locations. I trained in one of the big farms of Alhaji that was buried far from the road. The same road leads to Kazaure in Jigawa State. We had already spent 2 months and 3 weeks already training.

We both looked fit, with six packs and muscular arms and chests. My head was hairless and glistened because of the baby oil I apply abundantly to it.

''Shoot the targets from the position. Aim for the heart, head and the spot between the shoulder blades and neck. You kill a man that way. Dead men pose no threat.''

He concluded. At the blasy of his whistle, I was top notch headed towards the tree which I climbed easily. On the three was an M-16 fitted with a target glass. This I picked, quickly detached the magazine to check the ammunition. I aimed at the various scare-crows arranged distance from each other and fired.



TO BE CONTINUED...!!!

YMCgyna: Una too much joor kudos

You no dey sleep ?

Thanks for the comment

A silent knock came on our door, at first I ignored it but had to stand up when it became persistent. Whoever stood at the door really need to see the devil in me. I limped towards the door, my knee and balls feeling like fire. I wanted to cry out but then, the door remained to be answered. I peeped through the visualize glass to see the oblong head of Engineer.

''Na wetin na, we dey sleep''

I shouted from inside but the door seemed to be sound-proof as he kept knocking and pacing. I walked back to the room to see Flow sprawled on the bed like a sacrificial grass-cutter. His wide mouth remained everly opened with saliva dripping out like shower.

''Make I mess for this boy mouth?''

I contemplated in my mind. He could wake up and bite my remaining ball, I reasoned.

''Flow... Flow!!''

I called to him, he just turned round and muttered some words.

''Yeah baby.. Give it to me. Duck style''

Like what the hell is ''duck style'', I mused. I shook him until he opened his eyes, he used his hand to rub the saliva all over his face like vaseline. For the first time, the legendary ''Map of Nigeria'' was missing from his face. It was not replaced by map of africa but ''Map of the Work''. The bed had really made him lose control.

''Attai, stop na.''

He shouted weekly, his eyes blinking fast. I had downed a glass of cold water on his face.

''Your friend dey call you''

I said to him, climbing the bed to continue my sleep where I had paused it. I felt him stand up and make his way towards the entrance. I was already beginning to enjoy my sleep when I heard a loud shout.

Engineer must be killing Flow since he looked bigger and more aggresssive. I needed to save my friend. I quickly jumped from the bed and made my way outside. My veins were pumping. I needed to teach the annoying Engineer a lesson.

I met Flow crying his eyes out. One look at him, I knew he was really in for it.

''Na so my dream be ooo''

He wailed.

I looked at him like he gone mental.

''How your dream take concern me?''

I asked the obvious.

''When we trek go Alhaji house, you go know.''

What was he talking about. I wondered if he had been smoking in that dream of his.

''Na so people dey take mad''

I said impatiently and turned to enter the house, giving Engineer a scornful look. It meant, ''Na goodluck you get, I for no show you patience''.

''Attai, them don move the car''

I stopped in my tracks. My mind went blank. What was he saying? What car was he talking about?

''You get car wey dem steal?''

The shock of the news made me ask a stupid question.

''Na car wey Alhaji give us ooo''

Flow cried.

I pitied ourselves. Money does not come easy and to think of a Camry 2.2 was really a burden at that time.

''How e carry happen?''

I asked another question. Flow only gave me a dirty eyes. Engineer just stood watching the whole drama. Even a little 'sorry' he did not offer.

''Make we call Alhaji tell am na?''

Flow suggested.

''No, him go vex well. Make we go see am''

I said to him. I made my way into the room. The keys of the car still stood in its position. How did someone move it? It was supposed to be on security.

''Attai, we don enter trouble o''

Flow said as he finally came inside. By the I had brushed my teeth. I opened the wardrobe to see clothes my size with shoes and wrist watches to match. I slipped into one, putting on a slippon. I walked out of the house and waited for Flow to join me.


************************************

''See the stupid car here o''

I confirmed by pressing the lock key on the car remote again. Flow looked like he wanted to leap into the sky. The car was parked at one corner of the giant compound.

''I will let this slip by.''

Alhaji twisted his beards in his hand. His eyes darting from my face to Flow's own.

''It won't happen again''

I said to him.

He was not angry because of the car but for the fact that we had left the house after telling us we would stay for three months before moving to Somalia.

''You are not to leave until you are granted permission directly from me. You training session starts today''

He said the final words.

Training we came to detest and appreciate.




GOODNIGHT Y'ALL

TO BE CONTINUED...

For the record, I am following you... And to say the least, your introduction is funny.

This promises to be a smooth ride... Abeg, pass me igbo!!!

Great one FLOW... I dey feel you wella...

just call buki: can't stop laughing......u made mai dea!

Fankz for liking it...

yemi2plus2: this one na update? Come type long update jor

No vex... I no dey right frame...

''Na your future wife go born pig''

He answered. I was just too weak to argue, I closed my eyes and rested. My big mouth had brought the whole thing on my head. Minutes later we were in front of our former site. The place had been painted.

''Attai, make we go see our room na''

Flow said.

''E be like you forget say na Alhaji house we go stay''

I said to him. I adjusted the chair and laid down, my body was really painful.

''Owk, e be like na only me go go check''

He said, opening the car and getting out.

Work waited and I was gonna harness it.



TO BE CONTINUED!!!

''Flow... Flow...''

I called weakly as he zoomed off. He turned to look at me, his face registering pity.

''Attai, how you dey feel?''

He asked an annoying question.

''Trailer don ever jam you before?''

I asked his to which he shook his head.

''Na trailer go kill your useless head. Mumu wey no fit defend him friend''

I cursed. He was expecting so instead of getting angry, he broke into an annoying laughter.

''Na your papa go die like that, ijiot''

He replied.

''Your sister go born goat''

I said to him.