adren:
i stormed on one guy's post asking to be saved from his guilt.. people never took him seriously.. someone went as far as suggesting he cut off his hand (just like wright's mom did on instagram).. NL can make you want to co.mit suicide without killing yourself.... lolssss


to everyone, this might be funny and hilarious but it is a thorn in a masturbator's flesh..

i want to share this solutions because i used to be one prominent member of the "masturbators association of nigeria- MAN" myself ( i was about to be voted as the vice president before i resigned)..

trust me, experience is the best teacher.. some would ask you to pray about it, some would even ask you to give your life to jesus .. bitter truth is, i once saw a painting of the mother of jesus- Mary, i found it sexy and i got a hard-on from it.. i had to masturbate at the next chance i got..

so.. this is about personal issues.. it is a disgrace because you don't wanna be caught by someone else (your prick go calm down instantly)..

enough of the stories.. these are what i did to stop it.. it wasn't easy but i am a living proof..




1. avoid been alone when you feel Hot: boys naturally have high libidos.. except one is impotent.. unless, it is bedtime, you dont wanna be caught left alone.. there is this spirit that pushes you to do it and you would have cvmmed long before u get back to your senses..

the best solution to this is looking for a public place with lots of crowd to interact with..

even the devil cannot give you enough liver needed to masturbate in public places.. go to a football viewing centre, a gaming centre, a bar etc..

2. desist from porn: the last time i masturbated, (30-12-2016) .. i was feeling lonely, idle and 'single'.. imagine a 23 year old without a gf!!
so.. i switched to my favourite porn site to watch the only thing that can satisfy my urge and get me so high to think masturbation is the only thing that could get me out of my fantasy..
i masturbated as usual but it was not business as usual..
then i thought to myself 'o boy, is this how you would keep living till the end of your days?? is this how you will continue into 2016?? at 23, you don't want to get a life??

mind if i tell you my readers, that my masturbation act got so bad that i could masturbate in an uncompleted building.. i'd just bend down like i want to defecate but emmmm...

so.. it was the last day i watched porn..

3. drink lots of water and pee everytime: for guys, peeing has a way of suppressing erections..
i need not talk much about this but it is the best and the most proven strategy to help stop it only if you want to..
when you feel that the devil is about to make a workshop out of your hand.. stand up almost immediately and go pee.. force out the pee if it won't come.. it is a sure bet that your joyatick is going to take a chill pill (500mg)..

4. get a girlfriend or pay for a one-night stand/quickie (olosho): this is a long-term solution.. i know myself.. even if i tried to stop masturbating, and i do not find a long term solution to my problem by looking for a "LASWMA" to leave my 'trash' for, my case might end up been like that girl in the bible whose demon was cast out and the demon went to invite seven others..

masturbation has a way of torturing sex freaks.. fortunately for me, i went to a party the first week of 2016 and that was where i met this fine girl.. she is from ondo and they are only second to calabar girls on "baddest nigerian babes list." if such thing exists..




on a final note.. i have only written this to inspire those who are battling with masturbation issues..

i dont know if ladies can utilise my 'tested and trusted' methods but i can use ayilala to swear that this will work for you 100%..

if you are bold enough.. without feeling stigmatised, share how u conquered it.
you would be helping a thousand others who are dying in silence.. and if you want to start stigmatising, think again because your relative is doing that shiiii right now..

and to etc.. this is plagiarism free and not "oyinbo man" recommended.. their ways are different from ours..

hope this helps!!

BEEGOLD797:
Kind-hearted Police Officer In Ibadan

Yesterday i was on my way to meet up with an urgent appointment when i ran into an accident scene. An okada man just hit a little girl that was hawking on the road along Dugbe. I stop and rushed down to the scene to help carry the girl to a hospital people gather there the girl was bleeding serious from the deep cut she had on her forehead while the okada man too was Languishing in pains as he had dislocation on his arm and also bleeding. I told people standing that we sould take the girl to a hospital but we will need a police man to follow us or report in order to avoid police wahala, so a man joined me and we rush to Iyaganku police station we report the case and they call one of their officer and he quickly follow us to the accident scene, but getting there we could not see the girl again we were told by people around the scene that the girl has been taken to Jericho hospital. At that point I said to myself at least i have tried i should quickly be going to meet up with my appointment, but this police officer said the most strange thing that i v ever heard from a police officer mouth he said "please my brother go and turn and lets go to the hospital they might need money" i was stun and surprise that a police officer could say this, i have to quickly drive down to make a up turn.

We got to the hospital and saw the girl just laid on the bench and soaked in pool of her blood without anybody attending to her, the officer went in and asked the nurses and doctor why the girl is not attended to they said they will need money to buy the necessary materials to treat her, the officer said get me the list of the items i will pay for it, to my surprise this officer went to their cashier and paid for everything and immediately the nurses and doctor started treating the girl. He drop his number with them and told them if they still need anything they should call him that he has to quickly go back to the office his attention is needed. We left the hospital and i drop them off, while i was coming back from my appointment coincidentally i met the officer on the way going back to the hospital i just told him to come in so we could both check the girl in the hospital again because he said the doctor called him that the mother of the girl is around.

We got there and the doctor said they have taken care of the girl but most still come for some treatment for like 1/2weeks he now ask the mother hope she will bring the girl for treatment the mother said she would have love to but she doesn't have money, to my surprise this officer went back to the doctor and told him to give him the bill for the 2weeks treatment and this officer paid for it again and even went to d pharmacy there to buy the drugs they prescribe for the girl. I was like wao is this man a policer officer? For once i was proud of Nigeria Police Officer.

I collected his number and ask of his name and he told me he is SUPOL BILLY JOSEPH DT1 IYANGAKUN POLICE STATION ibadan.

Kudos to this officer if only we could have people like him in the force Nigeria could have been a better place for all. I am truly proud of him that's why I have to post these on this forum for us to appreciate the good ones among our officers.

ssoftappless:
YOU cannot scam a warri guy, never!!!! to all warri guys, im shouting AREA!!!!!!!!!

ariyike23:


Lol..clown,u made my day dough,buh i really dnt wanna kip dis up,dts d onli rison i stopped this,i cn be very nasty.. btw,words dnt get to me plus dis last post jes confirmed my fears,u re a child kiddo..

ariyike23:


lol,yu made the inference and i jes gave u support.. u are the school cert now because if yu are not,u wnt be finking like a pry school child. Nope i prefer yur dad,lemme be ur step mum ,u can call me aunty instead of mummy..oniranu since 19.00 b.c .okay im tired of typing, i wnt respond anymore.i had fun wif u..#byee

ariyike23:


lol.babe i warned u oo.sis,i hope u know i can pay u watever u are earning..and dnt worry,im coming to sleep with yur 'fada' so he can give me a job as your step mum,nd i"ll inherit d peanut ur 'fada' has.. imagine school cert calling llb,bl,llm inefficient..lol,bae u need a brain check.. i dnt work round d clock like yu do nd still earn peanuts

ariyike23:


No i dint get ur point aunty..expansiate more.. if u some hungry bi*ch,dnt make evry one of us seem hungry as you are.. Am sure you read wat i wrote well,dnt get nasty wid me,u wnt like it,i dnt like coming at my fellow girls buh i hate mediocrity and u are an example of that.. okay check google to know wat that means. U wanna be my play toy ,im bored yu know ,bring it on.. dont worry if u run out of 10 mb,i"ll resubscribe for u

ariyike23:



lol,bi*ch had to go read my posts,she stalked me..fck,i hope yu read it well or ur megabyte didnt allow u read all,kos u wulda seen where i wrote i needed it for my sis and in all dose posts,u wulda seen that i wrote on behalf of someone,,no worry i will soon cme date your hubby or boyfrend,im sure u checked my dp too and know ur bf wuld dump ur silly ass if i cme near him.. dnt get nasty wid me hun,u wuld hate urself

ariyike23:


oops,,STFU.. it should be shame on you instead,what kinda thinking is this? your idea is just out of this world,im sure you are saying what you can do. Change jare sis,its bad for yu

nlfan:
This Is How I Broke Him Down After He Broke My Heart

I met this young man when i was 21 and he was 24 we dated 4 years, we were both struggling, we stayed with each other and help each other to grow.

We grow to become successful and i became very influential in my field and he was so proud of that.

Last october we agreed to walk down the isle, we were planning where we are going to stay after the wedding, he stays somewhere in Lagos mainland while i stay in the island. He told me that he will be moving somewhere in Mowe in Ogun State where his father built a house about 2 years ago.

I told him that will not be a good idea, going from Mowe to Victoria Island everyday will be terrible for me since we can afford a house in Lagos at least for now or we stay where he is staying currently, he maintained he cant change, we could not reach an agreement on that, the next thing i got a shocker, he traveled for event outside Lagos to the east, where he comes from, only to get attracted to a girl he met there and came boldly to tell me, if i cannot marry him and stay at mowe, there are so many good girls who will rush the offer and in annoyance i told him, have you found one please marry her.

To my surprise few days after i saw a photo of him and that girl he just met, less than two months all over social media, he has engaged her.

Initially i was pained, but let's face it he doesn't deserve my tears, his groups of friends started calling my line to ask when we stopped dating since we still stepped out recently to his friend birthday.

I didnt know what to say i asked them to ask him, things went that way and i started hurting, after he did official intro to the girl i knew it was over, i called him and told him i wish him happiness and best of luck with his wife to be.

He felt bad but said he knew i was a good person that he is not shocked i called, i ask him to keep me updated on wedding plans and he did and i told him i will attend he said he will be grateful.

On the wedding day, during the reception i showed up, i had gone to get a very flattering dress, i even paid for make up, i looked so beautiful i couldn't believe myself too

When i entered the room everybody went crazy, all his friends and associate knew me, some are even pained at what he did to me, i showed up all his friends rushed to greet me, it took over 30 minutes to cheek kiss all of them and hug a few, the few people who didn't know me was wondering who i was and why i am so beautiful

I went up to greet him, he almost fell down from where he was standing, i greeted his wife ( a village girl from akwa ibom lol - the way she pronounce the thanks for coming though )

I started catching fun and dancing crazy, my ex couldn't stand it anymore, he ask his wife to go inside the car only him came to greet his guys where i was seated, THEN BROKE DOWN IN TEARS

HE CRIED SO LOUD LIKE PEOPLE WERE SCARED, People will think that i will disappear from there scene since he was crying, i was still seated shaking body to the tune of music, he then told one of his friend, i don't know but i think i messed up - the guy was like you messed up big time, are you just realizing, then live with it the rest of your life, his wife rushed out of the car i guess he heard his prince charming was crying, he came and the moment she opened her mouth to ask daring wot isssit, guys had funny faces about to explode.

At that point he left and i continue hanging out with his friends before oping into my car to go home. He sent a touching sms yesterday.

sapiosexual1:
I couldn't have asked for a better valentine gift as my babe of life showered me with an iPhone 4s.
She has really been more than words to me.
This is also an eye opener to us all, if you value someone, you would go the extra mile to make him/her special. Needless to say, my babe values me and knows my worth and she has demonstrated it times without number. Love you babe.

1stluv:
Let me re-analyze it for u, after u might have spent all that amount to buy drinks with ur guys, that's when one of ur drunk frnd will have the courage to ask ur gf whom u might have spent ur winning from the bet On out then u will be heart broken and left with just dat Amt u reserved for ur bae......only for smart bae that can press ur mumu botton sha

hakinze00:
Is it just me finding this pix dumb? How roasting go make person shrink like that?

SURElee:
So where is the picture of the guy roasted like chicken? Change the topic please. The guy is probably into Yoga and that is naked yoga.

vicstar:
what an eyesore that dude is so gay

Vivly:

Shut the f^ck up already! You're beginning to sound like a broken record.
And yes, it's my business since you decided to make someone else's ex affair your business.

Jadekitana:


Let me leave you to wallow in self pity, Btw i'm off for a pre-vals date, Pele i'm enjoying my life because I have just one! YOU can continue to rave and rant here, it wouldn't change your present situation! Byeeeeeeee hater.

Jadekitana:


Babe u are sounding like a pained lady who has never dated a rich guy in her 35yrs on earth! I would forgive the fact that you have never entered these places you just mentioned,you so fantasize about going to these places no wonder u are pained pele! Tell your bobo to take u to double 4, their lebanese dish is 7k/plate, then 2mrw visit quilox a bottle of drink is 25k there. Broke thing!! I don't need to throw myself on a man to be taken to exotic places,class speaks louder than voice. Next time just beg me to take u as handbag so u can enjoy a little before u die of beef and frustration! I bet u live in ajegunle or under ojuelegba bridge. Take heart and rejoice with others having fun, stop hating on a lady enjoying life to the fullest, that's if u not a broke guy posing behind this moniker.

Jadekitana:


Yes i'd follow up and down because it's not your business! How come u the only lady pained with my write up? Abi are u one of those girls or boyfriend snatchers? Secondly people like u who always jump to talk about self esteem are always the ones with the lowest inferiority complex so babe you have nothing to argue here. I followed him to th rest room shouldn't be your headache, whether he's rich or poor is absolutely not your business! What u should do is condemn the act of broke sluts, except you are one.

Jadekitana:

Forget people like u make mouth and do worse! Last time I checked it's emotionally healthy to trust nobody before they rub the worse on your face. You better be smart!

Jadekitana:


Would you sit and allow another woman snatch your bf? Rich or poor?

Jadekitana:
You are very correct, especially @double 4 in shoprite lekki, even when they can't afford any meal there, they come heavily dressed with loud makeup ready to snatch your boyfriend. That's how one started speaking igbo with my Ex and laughing anyhow, their table was empty all through! When he went to the rest room, she followed! Trust a sharp babe, I followed too and made sure I waited for her to leave the rest room, I followed her back to back. When obviously her runs was spoilt they shifted Base to a lebanese maga! Broke lagos runs girls.