She no fine buh her bank alert na gbagam!!!!!

Bobrisky and his gateman/housekeeper are bunch of confused dumbfuccks. Bia Op which one is male housemaid again. Op u r confused too, oya join their que

If she's my gf I'd buy her a sexxx toy

Obiano: Sir, UC browser is no longer available on Google Play.

Buhari; What is zis one saying?

Once had a friend on facebook who's
new on facebook.


Every time he'll be updating his status
with: "MONEY, MONEY MONEY" at least 30
times everyday


.
I became so curious and furious, because
his post was always flooding my wall.


.
One day I summon the courage and
chatted him up


.
ME: hey dude!


HIM: hi


ME:Why are you always posting "money"
Every time?? don't you know you're
making some people uncomfortable by
doing this?


HIM: sorry bro, it's because facebook
always ask what's on my mind everytime I
log in.


.
I just fainted


.
Have a nice sleep palz

Bros no faint oo. U go wake up with leaking "behind"

Alvin007:

LoL

Go and ask d owner

The Uncle, the niece and the dress are all mad

ayamAgenius:


Get a 4G phone that supports that band. You'd be singing their praising all day long.

Too late

She wants a fvcking new phone and a new boyfie

I will never forgive glo. God punish their slow ass network

Earthquake1:
He is not staring at the lady's backside, he is just looking up.

But d asss is up na

The topic is misleading

He is a ritualist

African Poseidon

vivie01:


That's the spirit bruv! We no dey fear their fear, God has not given us the spirit of fear but that of power and sound-mind!
***Thank God na inside my house I kuku dey***

Hahaha funny girl

vivie01:


Similar thing that happened during the ebola things, lol, Pastor's faith no fit carry that one, who wan die

Fear of these endtime diseases is the beginning of wisdom oo

vivie01:


All these hassle just to kill ant??

Lol, the point is to torture d ant till it shout "abeg am tired of these series of wahala, make una kuku kill me... lol

There is this guy who has a 25 inch dick. He goes to a witch in the woods and asks her if she can make his dick smaller because he just can't please the ladies because it is just too big, he hasn't found a lady yet who likes it and he can't get any pleasure. She tells him to go into the woods and he will find a frog when he finds the frog he is to ask it to marry him. If the frog says no, his cock will shrink 5 inches. He goes into the woods and finds this frog. He asks "frog, will you marry me?"
The frog says "no" And his prick shrinks five inches. The guys thinks to himself, "Wow, that was pretty cool.
But, it's still too big." So he goes back to the frog and again asks the frog: "Frog, will you marry me?
Frog: "No, I won't marry you."
The guys dick shrinks another five inches. But that's still 15 inches and he thinks his chop is still just a little bit too big. But he thinks that 10 inches would be just great. He goes back to the frog and asks: "Frog, will you marry me?"
Frog: How many times do I have to tell you NO, NO, NO No No No No No No No!!!

HUSBAND: My wife where are you?

WIFE: At home love.

HUSBAND: Are you sure?

WIFE: Yes.

HUSBAND: Turn on the blender.

WIFE: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee

HUSBAND: Ok my love goodbye.

Another day
HUSBAND: My wife where are you?

WIFE: At home love

HUSBAND: Are you sure?

WIFE: Yes

HUSBAND: Turn on the blender

WIFE: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee

HUSBAND: Ok my love goodbye

The next day, the husband decides to go home
without notice, and finds his son alone and he
asked him son where is your mother?

SON: I don’t know, she went out with the
blender.

Mosquitoes of nowadays have
no respect again.
They will come to your ears and
start singing;
'If I tell you say I love you oo.
Your body, your blood na my own ooo baby. 30
litres for my
tummy ooo. Malaria and
sickness for
your body o baby...'


A smart guy like me will just
shaperly compose my own track; 'Are you
done
talking?' Are you done talking?'
'Mosquito are you done
talking?'. Sniper fall on you!
Otapiapia fall on you! Coil fall on you! Cos I will
kill you eeeeehhhh eeeehhh!.

A man went to Church
on Sunday and gave
testimony that he was
infected with Monkey
Pox and God had healed
him. When he had
finished, he tried to give
the mic to the 2nd man
but the 2ND Man
refused to take it:



2ND MAN- I have no
testimony. Give it to
Pastor.





PASTOR- I'm not in
charge of testimonies
so give it to the Senior
Pastor.




SENIOR PASTOR-
Brother in Christ, the
mic is yours. It's a gift
from the Church. You
may take it home.

How to Kill an Ant. Mix powdered pepper and sugar & keep it outside the ant’s hole for it to eat. After eating it, the ant will search for some water near a water tank. When it's near the water tank, push it into the tank but don't allow it get drowned. Now the ant is wet and will go to dry itself near a fireplace. When it reaches the fireplace, put a bomb into the fire. Boom! The ant is now injured with 3rd degree burns. Take the wounded ant to the ICU. There the ant will be put on the ventilator and feel safe in the hospital. However at night, sneak into the ant's room and remove the oxygen mask from its mouth. The ant will gasp for breath and finally die from suffocation. DONE!

vivie01:

Things go sour ke? You dey fear? No be your fundamental human right you dey fight for? Just mention me ehn, in fact call me make I come help you fight for your right, no shaking!

Yeahh!! We go crush their balls like eggs, no shaking! We don't take shit from nobody!!

vivie01:


When you are not a coward, stay and defend your right jor, who born them?

If things go sour I go tell say u are my accomplice oo

Armed robbers dey on social media too. Who knows whether one of them is reading this?

Ewwww

Akpos went to church one Sunday, the pastor was sharing his testimony. He started like this “ Last week, I ran short of money. To the extent that I can not even provide food for my family. With faith, I told my wife lets go the supper market and buy some things. “But you said you don’t have money ” said my wife. I told her she should not worry that God will provide. After picking the items we need, I joined the payment queue. My wife looked at me and said “I can see you want to disgrace me, am going.” After petting and expressing my strong feeling that God will make a way, she calmed down. When it was my turn to make payment, an old friend of mine entered. He shouted my name, we hugged and shared life experience. Just like a film, he paid for all my items and gave me 20,000 Naira to take care of my family.” The whole congregations were screaming with joy. “Lord is good, Lord is faithful” Akpos said to himself “I MUST TRY THIS” The next day, Akpos appeared in a supper market without a penny. He was parking any item he can lay his hands on. When it was his turn to pay, the cashier said “Sir your money is N50,000”. Akpos said “That’s a chicken change! Just give me a minute” After 20minutes piccolo a 20years old friend enter and saw Akpos and shouted, "Akpors where is my money!? Akpos fainted!

Her dad's and grandad's bank accounts are adorable too