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Education › Re: Who Stole The Coke? Come In If And Only If You're A Genius. by gram: 3:20pm On Jan 05, 2016

@OP: The answer is quite straightforward - The search must continue, none of them stole it.

Romance › Re: A fellow Nairalander needs your advice before crossing the rubicon. by gram: 11:41pm On Nov 02, 2015

Your situation is not that complex.

One of the most difficult situations you can put yourself in, is to unsucessfully try to change your spouse, especially if she's a grown up adult. First, be sure you can live with her like that, then try to polish her. If she does not measure up, decide wether you can still marry her like that and close eye.

My friend, if eventually you can't close your eyes to the negatives, you are in for a long ride.

1 Like

Romance › Re: Why Guys Should Stop Complaining About Ladies Going After Readymade Men by gram: 5:20am On Sep 24, 2015

@ OP: This is a very childish post. How old are you?

Romance › Re: Am I Obliged To Tell My Landlord That My Girlfriend Is Coming And Wil Sleep Over by gram: 3:37am On Aug 28, 2015

No, but you are obliged to tell your pastor grin

Romance › Re: THE CONFUSED WIFE by gram: 6:15pm On Dec 18, 2012

@ op, please when you are dealing with brother in-laws, i advise that you exercise discretion. Consider this;

1. How attached is your hubby to his brother, you may never understand the connection between them, maybe he has supported your hubby in many ways( without your knowledge) and your husband is just trying to make him comfortable...I mean, for him to sacrifice his comfort..amd yours too, there has to be more to it.

2. Its a temporary arrangement, its not permanent.

The decision is yours but whatever you do, try not to come between two of them and dont let this occurence affect the nice ways you intend to host them.

Family › Re: Staying Single (best Drug) by gram: 7:18am On Oct 02, 2012

@OP. This is wisdom.

Family › Re: Should I End My Marriage by gram: 11:39pm On Aug 19, 2012

@ ORIGINAL POSTER

Firstly let me advice you strongly against divorcing your wife because she reneged on her initial decision to keep to your church, my reason: the author of the Christian faith around which the whole issue revolves does not support it so you won't be doing anyone a favour with a divorce on that ground. If you wish to divorce your wife, look for a concrete reason like marital unfaithfulness.

Secondly, its unfortunate that your wife is dishonest and the whole thing looks like a set up but that is marriage my guy, you had the opportunity to back out if you knew religion was so important to you but that is history. Believe me, your marriage from now on is whatever you make of your union, granted; you are living with a schemer so accept that, just be careful not to allow yourself to be schemed any further.

Finally, continue to work at it and press further, appeal to her, pray about it, make her see reason and I believe someday, maybe tomorrow, maybe next year she will see reason as she changes her mind. Let the decision come from her and don't be too forceful. In fact, make her realize that you respect her decision to do as she wishes but its just unacceptable to you as you wish she will change...don't let this issue rob you of your happiness. I wish you good luck.

Christianity Etc › Re: Church Members Barred From Discussing Chris Okotie’s Marriage by gram: 4:37am On Jun 28, 2012

gbadexy: That's the thing about religious books. It can be a dangerous tool in the hands of a fanatic.
I'm not saying pastor chris is a fanatic though, but the Bible just like the Quran can be ambiguous with different people giving it different interpretation to suit themselves.
Anybody can find any quote in these books to support whatever they may want to do and make it appear that was what the verse meant.
I guess most of the religious leaders are like lawyers, the Holy books are the constitution.
The congregation deserves to know what went wrong with their pastor's wedding atleast he is a role model they look up to and emulate. He deserve to give them a justifiable reason not to quote a verse so that the members don't see it as a normal thing to just dissolve your marriage at any slight misunderstanding and claiming the Bible supports cutting hands that may lead one astray.

Family › Re: Many Married Men Are Unhappy... by gram: 11:09pm On Jun 08, 2012

spendogram: Reading some of these posts makes me wonder why some people don't see that unhappy people are people who continuously make choices that make them unhappy. They are simply skilled in making such silly choices and they have their spouses to blame for that?

I am happily married and I can tell you that I chose happiness long before marriage so I had no problems making the right decisions. Many people feel that marriage is suppose to make them happy.Nothing further from the truth. You are happy because you make happy choices and such choices include who to marry and how to continuously live with the person.

One very important thing that I must not leave out. If you are a person that is easily swayed by adverts/packaging you tend to make wrong choices. You need to look at the content of things even if the packaging isn't really appealing. Western media has made a majority of the world population to believe more in packaging than the real content. e.g you lots of people with lots of friends and posting lots of nice pictures on social networks. And they always tend to remember your birthday (lol). It will surprise you that those same people don't only look opposite of what they portray themselves to be but also behave completely opposite in real life.

Family › Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by gram: 7:48pm On Apr 20, 2012

@op. If the story is exactly the way you put it, then I think your father in-law is a very good man. He opened the front door for you, and made the back door accessible, in fact he left the fire escape intact,

He is only trying to help you without tampering with your dignity..in my opinion, take the house, and follow his advice. all d best!

Romance › Re: Being Single- Sweet Or Bitter? by gram: 2:22am On Mar 30, 2012

....Hmm. This is probably one of the funniest and interesting threads I have read on NL for a while.

The point is this: This guy (OP) enjoys his own kind of life and he is talking based on his own experiences. The most miserable thing in this life is to do what you don't enjoy doing (Provided its fair to your fellow man), and this can not be truer in any area of life than it is with relationships, so let the guy enjoy his ride. Personally, I think relationships are for mature women, not nagging, ,manipulative, emotionally and intellectually draining women and there are not many of them out there...If he finds someone who truly makes him happy,am sure he will have a rethink, until then, my guy enjoy your life..I have met men who were better single and I think it is better to happily single than to be miserably hooked.

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Family › Re: Is It Right To Work For One's Father -inlaw/wife's Family?? by gram: 12:11pm On Mar 13, 2012

I have a little advice. There are some universal laws of nature and one of them is" Never put too much power in the hands of an employer" , it does not matter who that employer is, one of the most predictable things about humans is their unpredictability. Believe me, someday you should want to be your own boss. The fact that the person in question is a father in law makes it more complicated. If you are a very proud guy ( like me), you won't take this offer, but if You decide to take it, you need to have a long and sincere talk with your Father in-law. Please don't assume anything, discuss every issue and leave a back door open if necessary, let them him know what you stand for and let him define his mission and vision for the company while you define your own vision for your family and career,find a meeting point and work for the good of the company while there, be respectful and be willing to shed some pride, let it be clear you won't be doing the job forever and be prepared to start your own business somehow...it may sound too diplomatic but diplomacy is one of the best ways of avoiding misunderstanding...from the 48 laws of power "Never step into the shoes of a great man"..Get the book. I wish you good luck.

Family › Re: Is It Right To Work For One's Father -inlaw/wife's Family?? by gram: 12:11pm On Mar 13, 2012

Family › Re: Is It Right To Work For One's Father -inlaw/wife's Family?? by gram: 12:08pm On Mar 13, 2012

1 Like

Family › Re: Is It Right To Work For One's Father -inlaw/wife's Family?? by gram: 12:08pm On Mar 13, 2012

Family › Re: My Wife Is A Lousy Cook by gram: 12:56pm On Nov 04, 2010

ladygaga:
ARRANT rubbish,

@poster, i think u are partly to be blamed, am thinking that at a point u made her believe she knew how to cook because u didnt want to offend her, then you went ahead to marry her, now your stuck!!

fine, cooking alone doesnt make a good wife,but is a very vital plus, is this the way she would cook horrible food when the kids start coming!!

i think u should tell her she cant cook good food without mincing words , enough of the cajoling, then stop eating at home to make her know your serious!!, how a lady(married woman at that) would know how to cook at least the basic nigerian meals beats me, very pathetic!!

Well Said, Lady Gaga.

Politics › Re: Jonathan ‘ll Set Record By Not Contesting — Bamanga Tukur ! by gram: 12:42pm On Sep 08, 2010

Jonathan will also set a record by contesting, whether he contests or not, he sets a record.

In fact, if I contest, I will set a record.

We should be more interested in the record our leaders set in leadership, who cares about anybody's contesting records?

Politics › Re: FG Considers Sacking Sanusi ! by gram: 11:25pm On May 01, 2010

the bane of sanusi's reforms is that he changed too many things at the same time, excavating a hole to fill in another. He is not result oriented. He needs to be changed.

European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Inter Vs Barcelona 7:45pm by gram: 9:24pm On Apr 20, 2010

pep did not get it right tonight. barca was only lucky with the opener inter3 barca 1 so far at 80mins

Computers › Help, I Deleted My Pictures From My Camera! by gram(op): 11:45am On Mar 04, 2010

Please I will appreciate any information on how to get a free software to recover my pictures from my memory card after accidentally deleting them from my camera. I've heard of card recovery.com , does anyone have the license key/password. thanks

Travel › Re: Uk Student Visa/tier 4 Pbs - Your Questions Answered by gram: 5:55am On Dec 10, 2009

@ ell 77

Your contributions have been very useful though i've been passive on this thread.

I received a uk student visit visa for a short programme < 6mths as part of my academic work in sch ( university ), I also

intended to visit my sister during the period as part of the stated purpose of my visit. However, I could not attend at the stipulated time because

the commencement of the programme coincided with my exams. The programme is over now, but my visa is still valid (2 months spent). I've been

invited for a different programme in a different institution and I am free to attend. My sister is also ready to write another invitation letter. Can I

still enter the uk with my visa?. How rigid are the UK boarder regulations on a student visit visa ? Do all the tier 4 regulations apply to this type of visa?

i will appreciate your response.

Romance › Re: Is This Worth Breaking Up With Her? by gram: 12:44am On Nov 08, 2009

honestly, i dont know how old you are but i think your girl really loves you, i also believe she is very immature, honestly, disatnce is likely to hurt your relationship in the nearest future, if she sees more of you, she will forget that guy, if she sees less of you, anything can happen, so be prepared.

Romance › Re: At What Point Does A Man Stop Chasing : by gram: 4:24am On Nov 07, 2009

personally, i believe a matured man should understand certain truths before asking a lady out.

1. your motive, fun or marriage?,

2.she does not have to say yes!

3. Ladies are naturally created to be deceived, dates back to the time of the serpent. They dont see beyond their noses. Once they see what they want in you, they will come back crawling

4. For every lady, there is always a better one, so why the chase?

5. Be bold and be in control, determine the course of the chase, determine when it will start and when it will stop, be nice ,patient and cool while it lasts and resolute when you decide to back out. When you stop, dont take her back, that is if you are seeking true love, if not, go ahead.

6. Do you want Real Love. This is rarely seen nowadays, It exists with few ladies, if you dont meet such ladies, please go for option 2: try to be successful. This second category of women are those who like successful men. Real love does not take too long to happen, they will be the ones chasing you.

7. For serious guys only, do not waste time on a Lady, most of them do not turn out to be who they seem to be, before you ask out one lady, make sure you have 3 options, if you have only one and you want to kill yourself on that one, you may be played and manipulated, even married women love being chased, a chase is good to any lady, it shows she is still in demand, you may end up as areassuring factor.

DONT DO SOMETHING UNTIL YOU HAVE MORE THAN ONE WAY OF DOING IT, UNLESS YOU ARE DESPERATE,

8. Remember that a decision is as good as the time you make it. A good decision at a wrong time is wrong. If her answer comes at the wrong time, it may never work, that is why as a man you must learn to control as much as you can, dont give a blank cheque

9. Yes when you get that woman. Love her, care for her, WATCH HER, LISTEN TO WHAT SHE SAYS AND WHAT SHE DOES NOT SAY!

10. Finally, surmount the friendship hurdle, stay forever to make a lady your friend, not forever to receive an answer.

1 Like

Romance › Re: Are You Regretting You Marriage Or Relationship? by gram: 10:22pm On Oct 20, 2009

hmmmmmmmmmmmmn. shocked

Romance › Re: Virgins Anonymous : Dedicated To Virgins Only by gram(op): 9:51am On Oct 16, 2009

@honeric 01 ,I wonder o.

Romance › Virgins Anonymous : Dedicated To Virgins Only by gram(op): 9:42am On Oct 16, 2009

I have read so much about virgins and virginity on nairaland. I dont know if a thread like this exists already but I observed that a good number of
virgins are not too pleased with the fact that premarital sex is prevalent, or that eventually they may not get like minded virgins in return. I think virgins can help themselves by hooking up here and encouraging themselves to stay as virgins if they so desire. This is not to say virginity is a must,I feel that when you make a choice it is easier to follow through with it, especially if you have like minded people. This is not to say virgins ar better people either or will get the best choices, but at least they will be HAPPY WITH THEIR CHOICES.

Romance › Re: Get Married To A Virgin Or Die Searching! by gram: 9:11am On Oct 16, 2009

I think a VIRGINS ANONYMOUS THREAD should be opened by someone, i mean STRICTLY FOR VIRGINS so that all virginity issues can be discussed, virgins can meet themselves, get hooked up and the like. makes it a lot easier. We can maximise nairaland.

Travel › Re: General UK Visa Enquiries by gram: 10:59am On Sep 14, 2009

@ dammiac, thanks. I would welcome more comments

Travel › Re: General UK Visa Enquiries by gram: 7:51am On Sep 14, 2009

Passport Discrepancies, Urgent Information And Advice Needed.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HI NAIRALANDERS, I need some advice here. I applied for a UK student visa about 10 years ago but I was refused on the basis of insufficient funds.

At that time i was very young and some of the information given on my passport was not accurate because it was obtained for me by my guardian

ie my date of birth was backdated. Now i want to apply again on my own for a masters program,with a different passport and with the correct

information cos the correct information(DOB) correlates with all my documents. Should i make reference to the old passport in my application form or

ignore it? can they still have records of 10yrs ago? should i deny a previous application? NB.The application form contains a column where reference

should be made to any previous passports. thanks

Travel › O by gram(op): 12:14am On Sep 14, 2009*

HI NAIRALANDERS.

Career › Re: Medical Doctors' Forum: Let Us Know You! by gram: 2:40pm On Aug 25, 2009

I just stumbled on this thread and i found it very useful. @phantom, pls let's resuscitate this thread.

Romance › Re: Nothing by gram: 9:21pm On Aug 23, 2009

This is a simple advice: If you dont want to step ona man's shoes, put yourself in his shoes.

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