₦airaland Forum

whenever you see a criminal activity getting popular, it is because it is the new update on the street and most times this update are based on old format. This is an old format. If you are street wise, you will know this format.

This needs to be on front page. Don't let these criminals get away with this.
If you see anyone claiming his penis disappeared, make sure you drag them to the police station.
this can save innocent lives

SOMETIMES IT CAN HAPPEN NATURALLY AND YOU THINK THEY STOLE YOUR MAN HOOD, THIS IS CALLE TESTICLE RETRACTION. IT IS AN AUTO RESPONSE THAT CAUSES THE TESTICLES TO TOTALLY WITHDRAW FROM THE SAC AND YOU WILL THINK YOU DONT HAVE TESTICLES AGAIN. SEE SCREENSHOT BELOW

Hello nairalanders.
Recently, there has been an increase in the incidence of manhood disappearing. This is an old street format that criminals use to rob and extort people. Those being accused are actually the victims and those claiming their manhood disappeared are criminals. I have seen this first hand and this is how it works.

These criminals work in groups.
They would position themselves around and look out for someone they know they can easily intimidate, like if you look fresh and gentle.
one of them will walk up to you and hit you, before you can react, he would scream on top of his voice that his joystick has disappeared.
Now, this is where it gets really deadly.
Before you can defend yourself, his gang members would quickly come out from where they are waiting and begin to beat you. Some of his co criminals would pretend they checked the penis and they would confirm that they joystick had truly disappeared. It is all planned and they are all together.
In the process of beating you, your phones, wallet and other valuables, even your shoes will go missing. But you are fighting for your life, so you are not focussed on the things they are already stealing off you.
But because Nigerians are superstitious, they would believe the criminals and join hands in beating the unfortunate young man they accuse.

Guys, be careful out there and let us ensure we hand these criminals to the police.

This format works because Nigerians are too superstitious. Those people you see being accused are the victims.
I have personally witnessed it and it is similar to a format criminals use in computer village where the victim gets accused and beaten by the criminals stealing your phones. We have had to recover a phone of a victim that fell for something similar to this. The criminals even almost stabbed the boy just to steal his phone.

Be careful on the street guys. Stop smiling and looking weak when you walk on the street.

BossGerald:
I've told Ebola and his nairaland jobless hungry supporters like yarimo TemplarLandry helinues seunmsg that propaganda does not run any govt successfully.


Propaganda no dey run government

@princewill_nimi wrote the article and only cited the same things you ipobs are saying here and claimed the UAE official does not want to be named. https://edition.cnn.com/profiles/nimi-princewill#about
Very believable cos it fits what you want, but when it does not you will ask also point that the so called unnamed official is fake.
read it and did not see anything different from what you guys were saying here.
he is just like a freelance journalist for CNN based in Nigeria and he can use this to write lies too. Show me what made this different from speculations you guys have been making before.

Truth of the matter is, it has nothing to do with UAE visa ban, you guys just praying it all fails while pretending to love nigeria.

HIbreed:
That's what it is. You don't know the power of basic punctuation in conversations. As a writer, I can't write a single sentence without using the appropriate punctuations. Secondly, I don't use writing aids.

Go and correct your blunders here before I take you seriously.
https://www.nairaland.com/6778555/wife-kissed-son-mouth-too
Lesson: don't judge the skills of anyone with his nairaland post. No one is posting professionally here.

Galaxyss:
Honestly I appreciate your effort to put this out. I read that thread and was really angry, i couldn't comment.


Someone even asked the author where she was posting from, she was like "You don't need to experience a bone fracture to know what it feels like".



Walai those set of people would just visit Nigeria for few week and run back complaining of different things about 9ja, but would write epistle on why the grass is not green on the other side.


Bunch of hypocrites!!!

lol.

HIbreed:
That's what it is. You don't know the power of basic punctuation in conversations. As a writer, I can't write a single sentence without using the appropriate punctuations. Secondly, I don't use writing aids.

that is your business. Saying someone is not a writer because he chose not to use puncuations on naira land is silly. Are you his client? Does he owe you a punctuated piece?

ONEjoblessGUY:
Mad collabo..........
Kim jong UN ft Vladimir Putin.........

What's has USA got to say now..........

your stupidity is legendary. May your life be like the lives of the people living in North Korea. Why not japa to that country since you love Kim so much?

Naijaboy18:
Allies? Someone ought to sink that ship. The uk can go to hell

what is stopping you idiot.

PrinceOfLagos:
They keep inviting him for something not so important.

They see Tinubu as a mediocre that they could push around because they know he will jump on it like a motherfucker seeking for validation.

Imagine telling a president to leave his country and come and ring a bell?

Is this what Nigeria have been reduced to?

Is this not something that people like Tuface and Davido were invited to do by the Nigerian stock exchange some years back?

Why Dem dey yeye Tinubu like this na
What a disgrace

if obi was the one invited, you won't say this rubbish.

HIbreed:
Old post, though. Am I the only one here who believed this OP.

hahaha. It is funny when last year I discovered that nigerians are actually dominating the freelance writing space along with philipians. Seen a guy in osogbo that made $100k on upwork in just 1 year. Let those who are stupid keep arguing as if it changes anything.

HIbreed:
You are a writer but your sentence lacks punctuation ❗

What a stupid comment. Is he going to get paid for commenting here with punctuations? Same stupid question some one asked me.

erico2k2:
Sadly 7 figures aint shyte no more unless you lower your standard of living

I won't say that. Now that I earn this much it does not look like much, but I have to remind myself that there are people living well with 1/4 what I earn.
It is always good to just invest and grow your own business if you want to be rich.
I am sure by next year or 2 years time 100m won't mean shit to me. For now I will just appreciate the opportunity I have.

Seun:
It's been a pleasure serving all of you since 2005!

so we even share the same month. 🤨. Happy birthday

erico2k2:
Are you talking 7 figures too?

yeah.

Zyxsc:
I'm a software engineer working remotely from Nigeria. I earn a 7-figure monthly salary.
With my salary only (at an average exchange rate of 850/$), it would take me about 6.6 years to save up 100 million, provided I have zero dependents and had to cater only for myself throughout those years. It's quite a naive way to project this though because a lot of things can happen along those years. But it still gives an idealistic comparison base.

So my question goes to Nigerians currently living or have lived abroad. Can you tell us the country, the job title, and how long it would take to save up to NGN100 milliion, assuming you have zero dependents and have to cater for only yourself. Do remember to factor in taxes if any and other living expenses for yourself alone

The reason for my question is not far-fetched. I'm just wondering if it's worth it to sell ones' properties worth milliions just to JAPA and go start over again. Please, refrain from dragging the country's situation into your answer or any other reason to JAPA. Kindly focus on answering the question as best as possible.

Thanks.

I live in Nigeria, work online and earn about same as you. If I travel out it would only be for my children to live in a society where human life is valued not for money

Felix6:
Animal, his conscience will prick him for the rest of his life. Pussy judge.

you are very stupid. Did we not warn you to vote PDP? Obi should have supported atiku and we would have been sure that in 2027 it would be his turn. But you guys don't understand politic. Now you have made yorubas your enemies. Tell me how will obi now win. Obidients are very daft. You made tinubu win, so enjoy it.

donjazzet:
I hope nigerians are aware that many of the pro-tinubu accounts here are paid agents and not casual users like you and I?

These people are a coordinated propaganda group paid to try and shape and manipulate public opinions.
Look at the "likes" on their posts, you see how it majorly corresponds with the likes on the "pro obi" posts. If on any topic, a pro obi commenter makes a post and it gets 20 likes, you see that the pro-apc posts will get that very same range. 15-25 likes.
Please more people should speak up about this seeing as Seun is not tackling this adequately.

Don't let yourself be manipulated

You said nothing but the truth. And it is also true that most of the obedient commenters like you are also 100% paid agent. You all are paid agents fooling nigerians both tinubu and obi

helinues:
Amma stick to that advice

Have a nice day

so as old as you are you do not know how to ignore idiots?

muykem:
You people don't know the meaning of landlocked. It only means you can't access ocean without navigate through another country. Ebonyi doesn't share boundary with Cameron, you need to pass Akwa Ibom or Benue state.

tell the idiots o

Abidele:
Losing will make you stop trekking or stop you from receiving 8k as palliative right?

Olodo

are you trekking and are you poor? Just asking

Abidele:
Explain better pass hunger...

Very stale and unintelligent response

are you hungry?

Patronize adverts at Your own risk

Heavens2:
Please guys, pls if anybody can help me with any little amount to eat I will be very happy. Feeding is a big problem for me and my family please no matter how small. I havent eaten anything since yesterday in the morning pls. My dad is a retired teacher and my mom is late. Am a single mother with my own son mouth to feed, the little money i make have use it to cater for my dad illness and pay house rent but his health is getting worst. Now we can't even eat or buy water to drink. Please if you're reading this message pls come to our aid, no matter how small it will go a long way pls. May God meet you at the point of your need as you have show us mercy amen
Acct num; Angela Ubi

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G.TBank

Seun I honestly don't know what is wrong with you and your mods. If I were a mod (Not interested anyway) honestly these spammers will be frustrated that they will avoid naira land. Are they giving you share from the scam? If you like ban me again for telling you the truth. By now you should know I don't give a fuuuck

ggood:
God forbid with mergers with thief like Atiku,why are they talking about merger. Now is too late, Both Atiku and Kwakwoso has tested their popularity and they now believe that Obi is more popular than them and they now want a merger after seeing the handwriting on the wall.
Atiku and Kwakwoso should go and merge with Bula bla

you are specially stupid. So atiku did not get more votes than obi?
Obi will never be president. Atiku is next we warned u not to waste your votes. Now u have wasted it and tinubu is president. Congrats. If obi was wise he would have been next after atiku. The mumu has seen he cannot do it on his own.

BigBlackPreek:
UI

Unilag

Covenant

Unilorin

Uniben

Unizik

UNN

Futa

Futo

Uniport....the rest are trash

University of Ibadan my Alma mater the first and the best in sub Saharan Africa

god save u say u put FUTA

nairavsdollars:
AAU Glorified secondary school. Remove UI, UNILAG and OAU, the rest are trash

stop talking trash. FUTA is not trash.

dalass:
I had reported and ignored him countless times, yet he keeps coming back. I wish there's a way on NL to block him permanently from quoting me.

And yes, I quite agree that he's truly braindead!

keep ignoring. bye

JasonScoolari:
I wasn't talking to you.... Keep your opinions. 👍

hungry man

ablejesus26:
Bro You and banana dey quarrel

that his smoothie can never make you gain weight. pineapple, watermelon and milk are low on calories.
watermelon contains 20 cals per100g
pineapple contains 50 per 100g
milk contains 47 cals.

compare to avocado that contains 160 cals per 100g
peanut butter that contains 590 cals !

123papas:
Drink 2 bottles of tigernut and 2 bottles of kunu everyday. If you no turn akpati in 1 month, you get AIDS be dt

this is a better advice. very high cals tiger nuts contain over 450 cals per 100g

cc Rilwayne001:

JasonScoolari:
You lived fine with regrets of your foolishness. 😂😂😂

what you don't know is millions of people are living fine in Nigeria. Igbos, Yorubas, Hausas, Fulanis, it does not matter their tribe. Forget that some people are joining you to complain, the truth is many people are okay. Not everyone is hungry.

as for the OP. Rilwayne001:

You cannot gain weight from just taking smoothies on weekends only.
in fact, forget about smoothies, just eat well and as regularly as possible. I gained 10kg in the last 6 months without even thinking about it. so stop stressing

dalass:
Go and get tested... Rabies from a rabid dog is doing a number on your brain

why are you responding to a brain-dead troll?