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Nairaland Forum / Heromaniaa's Profile / Heromaniaa's Posts
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Literature / Re: Top 10 Nairaland Stories To Enjoy Over The Weekend by Heromaniaa: 7:33am On Jul 15, 2017 |
Car Talk / Re: 10 Mind Blowing Fun Car Facts You Need To Know by Heromaniaa: 7:27am On Jul 15, 2017 |
These things are not funny to me. |
Politics / Re: Abdullahi Wamakko Mohammed Dies, Set For Burial (Photos) by Heromaniaa: 8:41pm On Jul 14, 2017 |
One by one |
Travel / Re: UNTOLD Story About Dubai With PHOTOS - Dubai Is Not As Rich As UAE Govt. Portray by Heromaniaa: 12:40pm On Jul 14, 2017 |
Wow 1 Like |
Politics / Re: Andrew Otutu Obaseki Dies At 93 by Heromaniaa: 9:03am On Jul 14, 2017 |
rip |
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: Npower Replies Applicant Who Threatens To Bite Official by Heromaniaa: 8:56am On Jul 14, 2017 |
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: Why CEOS Don't Use Recharge Cards And Bank Top-ups by Heromaniaa: 6:50pm On Jul 13, 2017 |
?? |
Politics / Re: Sheriff Vs Markafi: Supreme Court Saved Nigeria From One-party State – Ozekhome by Heromaniaa: 9:41am On Jul 13, 2017 |
Health / Re: Major Causes Of A Weakened Immune System In Human by Heromaniaa: 10:19pm On Jul 12, 2017 |
Thanks. vivie01: |
Music/Radio / Re: A Nairalander's Twin Cousins Release Cover For DJ Khaled's Wild Thoughts (video) by Heromaniaa: 7:58am On Jul 12, 2017 |
Lasticlala, mynd44 |
Music/Radio / A Nairalander's Twin Cousins Release Cover For DJ Khaled's Wild Thoughts (video) by Heromaniaa: 7:55am On Jul 12, 2017 |
Hey guys, my cousins decided to have fun with Dj Khaled's 'Wild Thoughts' by creating an Afrobeats Version. Spot me among the dancers. Enjoy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NTjs0ixWUI&feature=youtu.be |
Health / Re: Major Causes Of A Weakened Immune System In Human by Heromaniaa: 9:36pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
vivie01:I love writing but the demands of a 9 to 5 job wouldn't let me put pen to paper. But I guess I have to try and squeeze out time for hobbies, relationships, and positive associations. 2 Likes |
Health / Re: Major Causes Of A Weakened Immune System In Human by Heromaniaa: 8:13pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
holatin:thanks. |
Health / Re: Major Causes Of A Weakened Immune System In Human by Heromaniaa: 7:05pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
Mbkite:Thanks. Avoid comparison, that helps. |
Webmasters / Re: Adsense Approval Group (terms And Condition Applied ) by Heromaniaa: 4:42pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
Is it advisable to buy adsense from a thirdparty? |
Health / Re: Major Causes Of A Weakened Immune System In Human by Heromaniaa: 12:18pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
I am often unhappy. I try, but I can't help it. |
Webmasters / Re: Adsense Approval Group (terms And Condition Applied ) by Heromaniaa: 9:32am On Jul 10, 2017 |
taiwofawole:I see you tried to contact me via mail. I couldn't reply cos the mail kept telling me invalid. Contact me on whatsapp via 07034482877. |
Celebrities / Re: Yomi Makun Yomi Casual Engaged To His Baby Mama, Faith by Heromaniaa: 4:06am On Jul 10, 2017 |
Foreign Affairs / Re: How Australians View Nigerians by Heromaniaa: 4:05am On Jul 10, 2017 |
Literature / Re: Writers On Nairaland: Update Your Information Here by Heromaniaa: 10:33pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
Pseudonym: Heromaniaa Location: Lagos state Blog: www.madman.com.ng Genre: madcomedy (I invented that) Books: The Diary of a Madman |
Celebrities / Re: Funke Akindele And JJC Skillz Club At Quilox by Heromaniaa: 9:27am On Jul 09, 2017 |
FIRST SIGNS OF MADNESS My name is Psalm. Yes, awkward right? But that’s the name my mamma called me when I was born. My Dad had wanted to call me Job, but my mamma would not have it. “Have you seen any man called Job that wasn’t a carpenter or a bricklayer” she had fired at my dad. “All the people wey dey answer Job na so so suffer suffer!” Mamma certainly hadn’t heard of Steve Jobs (well, after he moved out of the garage). Plus my oldman had suffered much, having lived from hand to mouth since he lost his job thirty years ago, yet his name wasn’t Job. So there was more to suffering than being called an ordinary name. “Let’s call him David” my momma had suggested. “It is simple and short. And remember he killed Goliath.” “David? The man who stole another man’s wife? I can’t call my son David. All the people wey dey answer David too like woman!” Mamma had thought of it and the lives of a few people bearing David in my neighbourhood had been enough to convince her. In fact two days before I was named, two married men had fought over a woman on the street, and they were both called David. After much dilly dallying, they called me Psalm. Popsy wasn’t so excited about the name; David and Psalm were like Bobrisky and bleaching – One and the same. But in the end he accepted it. So that was how I got my name, one would think after all the hair-splitting deliberations that gave birth to my name, my name would at least bring me luck. Far from it. I don suffer pass nyash. Yes. I have been peed on, shit on, sat on and what not… Yesterday was the day kasala burst for my head. I was on my way to an interview. Since 5 years wey I graduate, bros, I never see real job. But that yesterday, something told me that was the end of my job search. My girlfriend had linked me to a friend that had friend who was the GM in a manufacturing company. When I contacted the so called GM, he picked the phone and answered me like a vampire had given him a Mouth Gig. “Who be rat? He spat out. “It’s me Psalm. A friend of Sarah, who is a friend to Akpan, your good friend. He said you are the GM of Green food Industries.” I could hear him chuckling on the other end. “Werin you wan make I ju for you?” he replied. I was already getting pissed. “I want to submit my CV to your company. I was told you could help me get a job” “Bring am tomorrow, I go help you give the GM” “Are you not the GM? “Bro e be like say you never ready. I be the Gateman, your friend no tell your friend to tell your friend to tell you? My jaw dropped. But I had no choice; I tidied my white shirt and dusted my CV. I must get that job the next day… As early as 8 AM the next day, I set out. My gf had made a delicious afang soup the other night. I quickly heated four wraps of fufu, devoured it and left feeling like a bouncer. It had rained the other night and the bad roads were still muddy. I did my best to avoid reckless drivers from splashing dirty water on me. My best, as usual, was not enough. A man in a black prado Jeep zoomed past, emptying a pot hole of muddy water on me. I did what any other frustrated man would do. I boarded a bike and chased after him. Who knows, he could settle me with something tangible. The okadaman was a skillful rider but the prado guy had no chill. After five minutes, I spotted his car parked right in front of my babe’s apartment. Fear catch me like politician wey receive alert from Dasuki. I paid off the bike man and cautiously peeped into my girlfriend’s one room apartment. What I saw shocked me. The story continues in the next sequel “PRADO GUY” watch out for it. It’s gonna blow your mind… That is if there is anything left of it. Comment below, tell me what you think will happen next. READ DIARY OF A MADMAN: THE PRADO GUY (link below) 10 Likes |
Politics / Re: Man Transported Himself With Canoe In Ikoyi Due To The Flood. Photos by Heromaniaa: 9:26am On Jul 09, 2017 |
Career / Re: 6 Solid Ways To Put Up With A Difficult Boss by Heromaniaa: 8:15am On Jul 09, 2017 |
Education / Re: 5 Things That Happen When You Graduate With A Poor CGPA by Heromaniaa: 8:14am On Jul 09, 2017 |
1 Like |
Science/Technology / Re: Nigerian Man Catches Crocodile Inside Lekki Flood by Heromaniaa: 8:05am On Jul 09, 2017 |
Religion / Re: Major Mistake Made By Christians by Heromaniaa: 8:03am On Jul 09, 2017 |
Religion / Re: Can A Married Christian Couple Use intimacy gadgets? by Heromaniaa: 7:46am On Jul 09, 2017 |
Are the gadgets idols? 7 Likes |
Literature / Re: You Are Fired! A Story By Heromaniaa by Heromaniaa: 9:11pm On Jul 08, 2017 |
azeezat22:Thanks. |
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