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Heromaniaa's Posts

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Celebrities / Re: Breakdown Of American Rapper, Jay Z’s New Album, 4:44 by Heromaniaa: 6:47am On Jul 02, 2017
What's banana fall on you about?
Politics / Re: Photos Of Nigerian Soldiers Praying With Their Guns In The North by Heromaniaa: 6:42am On Jul 02, 2017
A man must do his job.

11 Likes

Education / Re: Which University Is The Best In Nigeria? by Heromaniaa: 10:12pm On Jul 01, 2017
Celebrities / Re: Anna Banner Meets Chimamanda Adichie (Photos) by Heromaniaa: 7:41pm On Jul 01, 2017
Two parallels that finally met.

3 Likes

Celebrities / Re: Anna Banner Meets Chimamanda Adichie (Photos) by Heromaniaa: 7:39pm On Jul 01, 2017
Romance / Re: What Is The Worst Name You Have Heard Given To A Child by Heromaniaa: 7:36pm On Jul 01, 2017
Lalasticlala
Education / Re: Author Of 'eze Goes To School' Buried In Onitsha by Heromaniaa: 7:35pm On Jul 01, 2017
He finally goes home.
Politics / Re: Police Authority Issue Warning To No Election In Anambra IPOD Threat by Heromaniaa: 7:34pm On Jul 01, 2017
Crime / Re: "Kidnapper Evans Capable Of Organising Jailbreak" - Security Operatives' Dilemma by Heromaniaa: 11:59am On Jul 01, 2017
Sports / Re: Lionel Messi And Antonella Roccuzzo's Wedding Photos by Heromaniaa: 8:00am On Jul 01, 2017
Celebrities / Re: Davido Shades Wizkid Again As He Shared Photo With Future Back In 2015 (pics) by Heromaniaa: 5:28am On Jul 01, 2017
His future is a throw back.

1 Like

Celebrities / Re: Hushpuppi GUCI Pure Water I Believe Naija by Heromaniaa: 5:25am On Jul 01, 2017
Celebrities / Re: Check Out Singer Runtown 'ghost' Outfit In New Photoshoot by Heromaniaa: 5:24am On Jul 01, 2017
Celebrities / Re: Revealed: The ‘real’ Reason MTN Dropped Who Wants To Be A Millionaire by Heromaniaa: 5:23am On Jul 01, 2017
It's about time.
Celebrities / Re: Nollywood Actress, Yvonne Jegede Stuns In Short Gown (photos) by Heromaniaa: 5:20am On Jul 01, 2017
Poor try
Celebrities / Re: Tiwa Savage Dazzles In Gold by Heromaniaa: 5:19am On Jul 01, 2017
I will pass
Celebrities / Re: Expect Our Beautiful Twins, Says Funke Akindele’s Husband, JJC by Heromaniaa: 5:19am On Jul 01, 2017
It's the season of twins.
Celebrities / Re: Beverly Naya Exposes The Married Man Who Wants To Make Her Wife No. 2 by Heromaniaa: 5:18am On Jul 01, 2017
Lol
Politics / Re: Rochas Okorocha Wears Diapers- FFK Says by Heromaniaa: 5:17am On Jul 01, 2017
Celebrities / Re: Nollywood Actor Cum Lawyer, Dr Kenneth Okonkwo Wins At The Tribunal by Heromaniaa: 5:17am On Jul 01, 2017
Dont joke with those words. Do you know what legal luminary means?
Celebrities / Re: Beverly Naya Receives DM From A Married Man Who Wants To Make Her "Queen 2" by Heromaniaa: 5:15am On Jul 01, 2017
FIRST SIGNS OF MADNESS

My name is Psalm. Yes, awkward right? But that’s the name my mamma called me when I was born. My Dad had wanted to call me Job, but my mamma would not have it.

“Have you seen any man called Job that wasn’t a carpenter or a bricklayer” she had fired at my dad. “All the people wey dey answer Job na so so suffer suffer!” Mamma certainly hadn’t heard of Steve Jobs (well, after he moved out of the garage). Plus my oldman had suffered much, having lived from hand to mouth since he lost his job thirty years ago, yet his name wasn’t Job. So there was more to suffering than being called an ordinary name.

“Let’s call him David” my momma had suggested. “It is simple and short. And remember he killed Goliath.”

“David? The man who stole another man’s wife? I can’t call my son David. All the people wey dey answer David too like woman!”


Mamma had thought of it and the lives of a few people bearing David in my neighbourhood had been enough to convince her. In fact two days before I was named, two married men had fought over a woman on the street, and they were both called David.

After much dilly dallying, they called me Psalm. Popsy wasn’t so excited about the name; David and Psalm were like Bobrisky and bleaching – One and the same. But in the end he accepted it. So that was how I got my name, one would think after all the hair-splitting deliberations that gave birth to my name, my name would at least bring me luck. Far from it. I don suffer pass nyash. Yes. I have been peed on, shit on, sat on and what not…

Yesterday was the day kasala burst for my head. I was on my way to an interview. Since 5 years wey I graduate, bros, I never see real job. But that yesterday, something told me that was the end of my job search. My girlfriend had linked me to a friend that had friend who was the GM in a manufacturing company. When I contacted the so called GM, he picked the phone and answered me like a vampire had given him a Mouth Gig.

“Who be rat? He spat out.

“It’s me Psalm. A friend of Sarah, who is a friend to Akpan, your good friend. He said you are the GM of Green food Industries.”

I could hear him chuckling on the other end.

“Werin you wan make I ju for you?” he replied. I was already getting pissed.

“I want to submit my CV to your company. I was told you could help me get a job”

“Bring am tomorrow, I go help you give the GM”

“Are you not the GM?

“Bro e be like say you never ready. I be the Gateman, your friend no tell your friend to tell your friend to tell you?

My jaw dropped. But I had no choice; I tidied my white shirt and dusted my CV. I must get that job the next day…

As early as 8 AM the next day, I set out. My gf had made a delicious afang soup the other night. I quickly heated four wraps of fufu, devoured it and left feeling like a bouncer. It had rained the other night and the bad roads were still muddy. I did my best to avoid reckless drivers from splashing dirty water on me. My best, as usual, was not enough.

A man in a black prado Jeep zoomed past, emptying a pot hole of muddy water on me. I did what any other frustrated man would do.

I boarded a bike and chased after him. Who knows, he could settle me with something tangible. The okadaman was a skillful rider but the prado guy had no chill. After five minutes, I spotted his car parked right in front of my babe’s apartment. Fear catch me like politician wey receive alert from Dasuki. I paid off the bike man and cautiously peeped into my girlfriend’s one room apartment. What I saw shocked me.

The story continues in the next sequel “PRADO GUY” watch out for it. It’s gonna blow your mind… That is if there is anything left of it. Comment below, tell me what you think will happen next.


READ DIARY OF A MADMAN: THE PRADO GUY PRADOGUY

11 Likes

Crime / Re: Nigerian Doctor Kills One, Injures Six At New York Hospital by Heromaniaa: 5:14am On Jul 01, 2017
His people should claim him.
Webmasters / Re: (before You Start Blogging) How To Make Your Blog Popular by Heromaniaa: 5:13am On Jul 01, 2017
Check out my blog
TV/Movies / Re: AY's 10 Days In Sun City: A Review By Heromaniaa by Heromaniaa: 8:52pm On Jun 29, 2017
Will the article be attributed to me? Will my website be linked?
reviewnaija:
On a scale of 1-10, what would you rate the movie? And can we feature your review on our website?

Career / Re: Nigerian Air Force 2017 Dssc Zonal Screening List by Heromaniaa: 8:49pm On Jun 29, 2017
Screenshot

Career / Re: Nigerian Air Force 2017 Dssc Zonal Screening List by Heromaniaa: 8:30pm On Jun 29, 2017
Mynd44 lalasticlala
Career / Nigerian Air Force 2017 Dssc Zonal Screening List by Heromaniaa: 8:21pm On Jun 29, 2017
Nigerian Air Force has released list of successful candidates for screening.
The underlisted candidates are hereby invited to attend Nigerian Air Force 2017 DSSC Zonal Screening on 3 July 2017 at venues indicated against their names. Candidates are to report with only original of their Credentials. Click here to access the list. Share to your friends. Comment below and subscribe for more.
Download the list of successful candidates here.



Click http://airforce.mil.ng/downloads
Romance / Re: I Consider Myself Too Hot For Nigerian Girls (photos) by Heromaniaa: 7:22pm On Jun 29, 2017
Sense fall on you. Pon pon

1 Like

Family / Re: Little Girl Who Was Found Wandering In Ikorodu Reunites With Her Family. Photos by Heromaniaa: 7:21pm On Jun 29, 2017
Good news

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