₦airaland Forum

forgiveness:
Chaii!! No free money.

Antihypocrite:
Guys, what is the fun in clubbing abeg? Few days ago I went to a club. Here is what I observed

1. Some girls hustling to get hook up gigs.
2. Some guys trying so hard to out spend each other.
3. A new job industry has been created for hype men. Whatever that means.
4. How can the smoking of shi sha be legal?
5. You cannot have a good time in a club. It's too noisy
6. I will never go there again.

FanRong:
I'm sorry, this post is going to be a long one. But you're saving a soul if you read through and advice candidly.


My story
We've dated for 6months and we've lived together for the 6months.

On our 3rd month, I found her interesting and told her I'll like to marry her. She accepted but no engagement ring or anything to show. We just accepted by word of mouth.

Since then, I've worked towards it. I've told her to call her mum and eldest brother(dad is late) to relate my idea and understand their feeling since it won't be that easy to marry. (same state, but my people and her people are highly selective in marriage)

After several persuasion, and threat that I'll throw her out if she doesn't relate the circumstances to her family, she called the mum. And again I had to force her to call the eldest brother. She claimed she did. And that's enough. I'm ok.

Meanwhile, there's this guy(her ex) she claims helped her when she came to Lagos. It was when I started accommodating her that I found out in her chats that she was living with this guy, but lied to me she was living with her Aunt and the aunt's husband was harassing her sexually and she wants to leave. She later told me the guy, though provides for him but has never had sex with her, even when she was living in his house. These stories doesn't move me since everyone, who is not a virgin has an ex. So I forgave all that and we moved on.

She wasn't everything I need in a women, but I told myself I could train her the way I want. We continued adjusting to each others likes and dislikes.

I feed her this 6 months, provide comfortable shelter, buy her things she needs,(not want). Told her I'll do more and open a shop for her, if we get married, but she still confronts me asking why should I wait till after marriage? . I didn't allow the words move me cos Its my decision and my money and also, I'm used to gold diggers.

A good number of times, I see her as being selfish. If things doesn't benefit her, she'll not get bothered even if I'm involved.

Just this week, It became obvious to me that she argues everything I request her to do. From 24th Dec, we've been on holiday, we're always at home.
1. I'll wake her up at 9 and ask her to prepare breakfast for the family, she'll prefer to roll on the bed than do it. I'll finally have to do it myself so I can get things done and get busy.

2. I detest girls on eye lashes. I've repeatedly told her how I dislike it, but when she went to fix herself for the Christmas, she fixed the eyelashes, Contrary to my demand.

3. I got her some sneakers to upgrade her fashion style and look smarter, instead of the usual slippers and sandals she wears.
When we prepared to go to the beach few days ago, I requested her to put on the sneakers to look more fashionable, but she refused buttressing that she must wear what she wants, sandals.

4. Few days ago, we had a heated argument and she said that if I'm not happy that she's living with me, that she can go, afterall, she has somewhere to stay. I asked her to go and she immediately called that her ex bf to come to my house. I immediately swung into action, took all her belongings out, before the ex will arrive, at the same time, retrieving the items I gifted her.
While she was struggling to have her gifted items back, our neighbours heard the struggle and had to come and settle for us. She apologized and I forgave her. we were back into the house.

5. Just yesterday , we left home together, and I locked the door and I took the keys with me. We walked down the street together to the Busstop, I have almost no friend and seldomly greet. But there's this my ex girlfriend by the roadside, she saw me and yelled my name, I went to greet her and my Fiancée picked offence, left me without waiting for me. After that I chased her and told her it's nothing because I've told her everything about this ex.
Before we could get to the Busstop, she demanded for the house keys and I gave her since she might come back earlier than me.
We couldn't say bye. The anger was clear on her face and we parted ways.

After about 15mins, I got to where I wanted to make payment for the items I picked only to notice I am not with my transaction phone. I was confused where could I have kept it, the seller insisted I may not have come to his shop with the phone, and the phone rang as I called with my second phone. so I had to call my Fiancée for assistance since she's with the keys.
At first, she said she was still around the Busstop but when I told her I needed her to go home and confirm my phones whereabout, she said she can't go back that she has gone far, shouted on me and hung the phone.

I called and called and called, but she didn't pick. Many thoughts ran into me. Who took this phone? My money? , my phone? , my sim card? . I had to find my way and trekked back about 4km to the house since I had no cash with me. And finally saw the phone ringing in my house. I was relieved.

The way she shouted to me on the phone got me unbalanced, I felt she would be fire if I get this girl as a wife.

We finally traveled to our home state today and I paid the bills for the traveling. My major plan of traveling was to see her people and do the needful before I mistakenly get her pregnant. But I'm seriously contemplating of canceling this plan and throw her out come January. I need peace.

Dear nairalanders, I'm really in the middle of the deep blue sea and the devil.

I need mature and candid advice please.
Should I continue with the marriage plans or the red flags are obvious?

Beremx:
He didn't even marry one first then marry another later. He decided to marry two at once. I hope he's rich enough to take care of both women.

19years old boy and polygamy. Smh

Oche211:
The guy dodged a bullet.
That lady na certified H*e. Go through her face book page.

Even she, won't support her own brother marrying a girl like herself.

Taribizy:
What does the man mean "she is just my baby mama?" They both have a child together and he hopes to just walk away like he doesn't know he is supposed to take care of his daughter? Truth be told the new wife may be laughing now but will be crying soon enough. Baby mama my foot.

Advice to young ladies will be marry first before giving birth to children to reduce headache and stress.

Advice to young guys is if you cannot marry her pls leave her as you met her to live long and avoid curses

Ziziguluogixx:
We dated for 10 years straight so i just purchased flight tickets for a holiday period for both of us to go see her parents for a formal introduction. I was driving her to work when i asked her to check the pidgin hole when she found the tickets i told her we were going to see her parents. She started crying. Almost a year later we got married. Been together for over 13years now.

Ferdinandu:
If curse dey work Tinubu for don die, all of Buhari's Generation would be dead, anybody relating to IBB to the tenth Generation will be in misery, Obasanjo would have long gone. But today they all alive enjoying heaven on earth but all the people that cursed them are waiting to die to enjoy their imaginary heaven. Nne lick your wound mend your broken heart and move on, The Guy you are cursing fit become Governor tomorrow on top your cursing

Colb461:
Go to the girls profile and see how she dress,trust me no reasonable guy would marry such girl. She runs the street

Streetmovement:
Wotoporiously speaking

What's the idea behind kneeling down to propose to a woman? Abeg make person explain am to me cuz I can't still understand that shit till today....i have thought of all possible ways and explanation that will convince me to do so but I can't still find it.

My parents have been together for longer than I can remember and my papa no kneel down but many marriage of these days will be over in just months even after all the kneeling campaign, so what's up with this kneeling down of a thing ....someone help me explain in their own understanding, all suggestions will be welcome from both men and women.

The floor is open

nizelgirl:
I don't believe in a man kneeling down to propose to a lady so I told my hubby don't try it with me before you receive premium disappointment. So he just asked me the question and I gave him the reply and the rest is history. I thank God for a peaceful home.

Psyrus:
Only simps kneel to propose, a typical alpha male would get the conquered female pregnant and allow her decide if she wants to be wifed of not!

TonyeBarcanista:
I sat down on the bed with her sitting beside me, and I said... "let's make this official, are you conformable with me as your husband", she said yes!

1Alex:
I was just desperate to marry (which was the greatest mistake of my life.) it ended in disaster as soon as it started

Theopneustos:
Good day nairalanders

I have listened to a couple of preachers both secular and religious on the issue of what is prime in a relationship and they revolve around these three which are romance,finance and purpose.
Some said romance is important, while others finance and yet some others purpose.

Which is more important.
I think it's purpose.

What do you think.

Naijagram:
Seeking your thoughts, everyone!!!

I work as a salaried individual and earn around 400k monthly.

However, my girlfriend constantly asks for money. I give her almost 100k every month and she feels it's not enough for her. She's even voiced discontent, suggesting I only send her money when she explicitly requests it.

I'm beginning to suspect her motives, as she seems solely focused on my income.

She never suggests saving or helps in cutting costs; her primary interest lies in spending everything.
Despite my genuine love for her, I can't keep up with her demands. I had hopes for our future together, but it seems unlikely now.

I'm considering a breakup as a solution.

Has anyone navigated a similar situation?

MikoB:
Tinunu and Ganduje dissapointed Akeredolu by not allowing him to impeach this guy, he has proven not to be a loyal deputy, imagine him celebrating and congratulating someone for the swearing in...