₦airaland Forum

@ poster, you forgot to include one sect: FEMINISTS[color=#990000][/color]

Please by all means do.

@seun Over sabi dey worry you. You think you already know everything. You are just 24 and still young, wait untill u become a parent. You can ban me on nairaland, it won't matter. I have been reading your post and you are allowing the so-called education affect your thinking.
As for me, he may choose whatever religion he likes but will only be wheb he/she has come of age and no longer under me.

Ok, here's what I like about my babe
1) She respects me alot and I appreciate that very well by respecting her too. Imagine am not in town now but she wants to get some driving lessons from her driver in the office because we get too busy together so she called to ask me if it was ok by me. I would naturally not object but you know someone that knows us might see them and tongues will start wagging. That's just how much we respect each other's feelings.
2) She's very chaste. I hear you laugh, ok that's what she has demonstrated and that's the more reason I will never cheat on her. For 3yrs now I have not seen nor heard any rubbish or caught her in a situation she will need to explain anything to me.
3) She's quite focused and a Christian with a good heart.
Those are just major reasons, things like beauty, career etc are all there but they dint matter much to me but I must add that she's breathtaking. See what I I've got?

Ok, now I should say that I 've lived with my babe 4 almost 1yr durring my NYSC. The truth is I donot cheat and that's not to say I have never cheated before, I mean that I do not cheat now. When am arround I see my fiancee everyday so we are not playing at all, beside we are doing it soon.
Talking about men cheating, not all men cheat.

@ MILITIA Trust me, I will b the first to get a ticket and do keep me posted when u are coming online for ya nite of thousand laughter.
Ok now, seriuosly u never know when a matured and sneaky guy cheats. Your semen in a fuction of ur diet amongst other things. I have seen a guy that pumped 8ml at ago and I had to ask him if he did not wee in the speciemen bottle. An average guy pumps from1.5-3ml at a time assuining he's normal, for some, they can still have quite viscous stuff even after jabbing another babe. What about guys that can finish jabbing yesterday and today they are still flowing like river Niger? You can't alwya s tell.

@ Aproko, tanx a million. The funny thing is: she's already shopping for all three rings. I would have liked to give her the ring myself but she's very fastidious about such things. She doesn't even like the so called conventional engagement ring no matter how many carats it's worth so I left her to make the choice since am very indifferent about rings. I was even contaplating not wearing one until it got to her ears and you can imagine the rest. I use to dream of giving my fiancee an engagement ring but it seems the opportunity just passed me by , I was probably too busy thinking of the real thing.

@ MILITIA, u 're just one hell of a babe. Ur posts brings so much fun here, am not a regular poster but I read most of the threads and since I started reading ur post I couldn't help but imagine how funny u are. Ur hubby must be putting up wit a very mischievous babe. Do have a great time and keep those nasty comments coming so I can have a great time

Ok I had fun reading this so am going to relate my experience here. I proposed to my fiancee last year and we are getting married this September yet, I haven't given her a ring. She's not even keen on wearing a ring yet untill after the trado which will be in September too. We have done some level of formal introduction, currently attending marriage counseling classes and her wedding gown has been bought already and yet no rings on her finger. We have our budget already mapped out, so much have been done already so we are not kidding and nobody is playing games here. No doubt she wants rings too but she just want to start wearing it after the traditional wedding which will be about a week interval to the white and cout wedding.
So people what do you think about me and my fiancee? We are sure of the wedding and I have no problem with the money although am thinking of getting her a beautiful engament ring this month end. What do u all think?

Truth is: yes I will forgive her but she can continue screwing the guy she slept with, am out of it. Can't imagine my babe screwing another guy whether she was sincere or not. This is just me, if catches me, which she will never (coz it doesn't happen) she can taker a walk.
I WILL NOT CONTINUE WITH THE RELATIONSHIP NO MATTER WHAT.
She will alays do it again an this time may not tell me. Peace bro.

Hey man, am Libra Oct 19, a christian, chelsea fan, lover of good music,

(s&f)

Njean, It's true that there are cultural difference but it's also true that the difference is clossing up and the world becoming a global village otherwise I wouldn't be communicating with you considering the distance. I will have to say that it depends on how enlightened his people are, this might boil down to educational status of his folks but haven said that, let me add that there are going to respect you. The level of respect also depends on how much he sell you to his folks, by that, i mean how he presents you. In average naija family, marriage is een as an eternal venture although that is also fast changing but they would like to know that you are with their son for real and not for time as may be determined by you and when u feel it's time to move on, you simply yank him off your back. this is what makes an average Naija family sceptical about "oyibo" woman.
On an average, a Naija brother will always provide and support his family forever coz this is where he gets his kick as a man. Just pray and everything will be fine.

@Njean, I will say that I am very touched by your post. You seem to be a woman genuinely intrested in Naija brother.
I believe as you read through post here you might get a glimpse of how naija men think and act. I must also warm that some opinions here could be very misleading but the truth is: if you keep your head down and respect him you will literally be in paradise. Naija men hate any thing that will bruise their ego.
@ Ayeisha, You will need to understand the mentality of an average Naija parent. You mentioned that when you say hello to his parents, they act cold, now you need to know you may take naija man out of Naija but you can't take the Naija out of him. Here's what I mean, even though they 've living in the US, they expect a more respectful greeting (in Nigerian context) like goodmorning sir. This may be some of their wahala with you. This does not mean that you are rude but it's just about the culture. Your man may not know all that coz he didn't grow up here, I can't imagine my bride telling my parents hi as a way a greeting, infact in some cultures in Naija, you are expected to bend a little while greeting. Just take your time to understand this thing and you will enjoy your man.
Enjoy your naija brother and love him coz he's worth it.

I am a man and they say, men don't cry but am almost at the point of crying. How fatal can one mistake be. I take the lesson with all my heart, I WILL NEVER HOLD ON TO ANY OFFENCE LONGER THAN NECESSARY.

@all U guys are copmplaining of boredon, imagine yourself in a location (offshore) where u only see water without bound and you are living in a space of less than 500m radius, the only babes u see is on TV yet you have to work there for 2 or 4 weeks in a strech before going on time off. Is that worse than alcatraz? Well if not for the pay, wetin I go de do for this place? I am so bored and mising my babe like crazy but sha I like my job. I love u so much and can't wait to see u

spora:
Just to add to what has been said:

If you are working, there is normally a clause in your letter of appointment that will stipulate the period of notice to give when you are leaving. In its place however you may need to do some payment in lieu.

If you are asked that simple question this is how to go about it.

"In as much as I would have loved to join you early enough, there is a need for me to give a Bleep months as contained in my letter of appointment. Besides, due to the sensitivity of my functions, there is a need for me to put somebody through, so that my exit will not negatively affect the company.

However, if you want me to resume early enough, all I need to do if to fasten the process of handing over and pay for the remaining period"

There are some points from the above statements:

1. You are given an impression of a responsible employee, who understand and abides by the rule of the game.
2. You are also saying that you are very much essential in your present place of work. Not a desperado.
3. You are confirming your interest to joining them even if it takes parting with some money
4. You are also indirectly assuring this would-be employer that you will not leave them unceremoniuosly, should you find another job in the future.

For a company that is serious and "desperately" needs your service, she may volunteer to do the payment in lieu on your behalf.

In all, one must be very observant of the reason for the question.

@ Everyone, Spora said it all. I am currently working and my terms of employment says that I am mandated to give my employer a minimium of 1 month should I decide to leave the company or pay them 1 month salary in lieu of notice. Same thing apllies to the company too.It is therefore not possible for me to leave without fullfiling those conditions otherwise I risk losing out on some of my benefits and besides like spora said I would have inadvatently sent the wrong message to my would be employer.
Truth is Spora said everything that should be said.

I don't usually respond to this kind of post coz it's quite annoying to say  the least but let me say that u think we are all fools to believe ur bull shit story. You 're 28yrs, married, bla bla, 9 babes. For any guy to say he doesn't know how to get away from any babe even when he is married is so lame and annoying. Why dont u have the effrontery to invite them to ur house and lay all of them at once with ur wife watching? Who is the woman that can marry a baby he-goat like you. who do you think u are? Mr charming, Bill Gate or who the hell. I am so pissed wit you that if I lay my hands on you I will yank off that ur little organ of magic .  I often wonder why some guys can't wait to get off their dippers before jumping into marriage. It has got nothing to do wit ur age but ur rotten mind. Thank God this is internet, I would have castrated you. Anyway, for ur wife's sake I will have some mercy but that is assuming u actually have a story.
My advice, next time, post something more real and sensible.

I just want to make it my bussiness repling posts today. Firstly, no sweetheart, love could come many times in a lifetime but you cannot possibly be in love with two guys/babes at the same time. There lies the issue, you are still in love with this guy so u can't love another yet.
I am in my second love relationship now so I am talking from experience. I have also been in relationships where I was loved without me loving and it wasn't fun to tell the truth. You have to either tell him and find out his reaction or forget that he ever existed. Yes! that's also doable and untill the bond b/w u two is broken, u can not love another and what is love when it is not reciprocated.
Goodluck and remeber to tell us what happened after

Believing me is your choice. I am not trying to impress anybody here. My fiancee is not even on nairaland and I made it clear that am not searching for a babe. I already have one that I love and I am content with her knowing also that am entitled to only one woman. If u check my profile, u will see that am no kid, I just happen to have time on my hands now otherwise I did be too busy blabbing. That's afar as that can go but seriuosly I own my third leg not the way round. I tell it what to do and where to go, its all in our mind.
Talking about side attraction, if I give you the option of having $1m to jump of the balcony of a sky scrapper would you rather jump coz the side attraction ($1m) is so tempting? I think that the issue is about setting your piorities right. Over the years I have learnt to look at every situation critically and consider the long term effect even if I had split seconds to decide. This is not the place for me to narrate my ordeals with women but standing up to the truth and doing the right thing will always put you ahead in life.
Finaaly, I don't know whom you are but don't let you third leg ruin you and just before you start getting other ideas, I like sex too . Yes I said it but it must be with the right person at the right time.

@cuteass, thanks. I did like to say that I mean everything I said. Sure am soon getting married and I believe my fiancee knows what she's got . There are so many men out there who think like me. I have friends like that and that's why we are friends.

Now here's my experience: There was this day I left alone with a house help who started getting all sorts of ideas. She was quite matured and has got the curves too. One day she was deliberatley spreading her legs apart with no undies while we were left alone in the house. I kept ignoring it assuming that she was just carefree untill she demostrated to me without doubt what she wanted. I promptly walked up to her and warned her. I told her to keep her legs closed and never to try any tricks with me. She saw the rage in my eyes and appologised for her behaviour. The fact is that I had a hard-on on seeing it but I told myself that I was too much to condescend to the level of sleeping with a house help.
I was also angry that she could dare think that she can get me with trivial antics.  Some men lack pride, I believe that am not a cheap man so not every babe can actually get with me and that is assuming I was still single.
Back to the talk, that girl respected me all the period she stayed in that house and no one ever heard it untill now at least not from me. I didn't even care if she told any lies to anybody that cared to listen, the bottom line is: I was clean.

Ok, lets get some fact here. I am a man and even in the days of yore I didn't use to stick my dick anywhere but I was also been my age (that's way back then). If a man decides to get married I should assume that he has attained maturity in all tiers. maturity entails seeing a sexy looking babe who is willing to dig with u and u consciously walk past her knowing that you don't have to lay every sexy babe you see to be a man. You must also know that not all flesh should be consumed as meat, infact some could even be poisonous. I need not add that your wife's sister fall into that catergory and indeed all other women once you are married. In my opinion, maturity entails a lot of self control. The mistake most guys make is thinking they can stick to one woman when they get married when they have not even dared to try such when they were single. Every single guy who wants to be faithfull to his wife must start been faithfull as soon as he is with a babe whether committed or not. Now that's what I call maturity but offcourse some of my men folks will crucify me but before you even think about it, I should add that I have been at both ends and I sure know what it feels like and with certainty can say which is better.
I dont get too mushy mushy or niceey niceey with potential time bombs like that. I make my stands clear at all times and that saves me alot.
Now to ur question, how many men can do that? I know so many men that can do that. I have friends who are married for years now and they have never cheated on their wives. I mean people not one or two. Some are my very close pals and I can vouch for them. I can do that as well and she might get a very nasty slap from me and I don't care what anybody else thinks coz I feel that I have got to protect my marriage (ohps I forgot am not married yet) .

Simple: where were u when she walked up to? you should have started yelling at her when she had only towel round her waist walking towards you, instead you were enjoying the sight and even allowed her to hold you before thinking of how to avert the ugly situation. Firstly, I should say that you must have unwittingly told her that she's welcome before she had the effrontery to approach you in such manner. You may have done that inadvertently but what you should simply do is snap out of her grips and shout down the roof on her and immediately report the matter to the sister. It doesn't matter whether the sister believes your story on not at least you have clean hand.
If u sleep wit ur wife's sister u will never get out of the situation free. It must surely boomerang some day and that will spell doom for u and ur marriage whoever started it not withstanding but this is assuming ur story is true.

@all, I quite can't understand the rambling about slapping one's child. If u were never beaten by ur parents then I would imagine that u are not Nigerian whether here or in diaspora. Even the Bible says that; "foolishiness is bound in the heart of a child but the rod of correction DRIVES it far".
@mamaput, well done for making her see in black and white. What else should you do when ur kid becomes a pain other than to instill sanity anyway you can.
@ seun, I wonder where u are coming from. You are not yet over there, yet your reasoning is very much overboard. I believe when you become a parent you will see better reason to slap, knock, or even spank a child.
I wonder where most of us would be today were it not for those slaps, cane etc.
Mamaput, you are the boss, you donot owe your kid any appology in that regard. Keep being the loving mum that u are.

@all, let me simply say what I know: there's a price on the woman's head, ever wondered why the man does the wooing, pays the bride price and actually does the taking? Little wonder then, the Bible told the man to love his wife and lay down his life if necessary just as Christ did for the church and purchase it hence we (the church) should henceforth not live unto ourselves but unto Him that gave his life for us. The significance of this is that the man has purchased the woman ( not as a property to owned and maltreated) but to some extent in spiritual terms. The woman is his pride even his honour, it is therfore better to imagine what you would have done to his ego. If you read Prov: 6, you will see the curse that is heaped on the man that sleeps with another's wife. I am a christian and must talk about forgiveness but some things are better not started at all.
The man should never cheat granted but cheating on the part of the woman does not equal the man's cheating. You mat argue that but just imagine that your mum was caught in adultery, imagine the shame it will bring to the family. Now turn the tide and place your dad in that position, you may not cry too much about it, some mught even say:men, dad is a bad guy .
I am man and would not say that I will forgive or not but my partner must also be reminded that I have a choice to divorce if the unthinkable happens. She can do same coz I don't envisage myself cheating for any reason, I did rather walk away. Easier said than done but if you check you will know that am no kid and I mean everything I say.

I am about getting married to a hot chic and I can tell u that am not afraid of anything whatsoever. I have dated pretty babes all my life and they vary in their inner set up if u know what I mean. Some are proud others are empty upstairs while a few are a combination of beauty, brain and morals knocked together in one person. I am very comfortable with my fiancee knowing that u have to really acces yourself before walking up to her to say what's on your mind besides she's proven over the years that she can be trusted. I need not say that she has every shade of men (high and mighty) asking her out but it doesnt make me shake because we 've come a long way besides knowing her personal philosophies of life. Furthermore, should I marry a babe because she's not pretty? or because not too many men will come after her? what happens when she suddenly starts getting attention for whatever reason?

Finally, I 've got to say that it's all in your head, if a babe meets my taste pretty or not am going to the alter with her. Furtunately, I have one and can't ask for more.

Am special for many reasons:
1) Coz there's only one me
2) I 've got a heart of gold
3) I date only one woman at a time (which is what many find impossible and most babes wonder how I do it)
4) coz I 've got the life of God in me
5) coz am just too special to those who truely know me.

Thank God I read this thread, I was planning to teach my fiancee soon but I think I will just send her to a driving school before something else happens. The only problem is that she's a banker and seldom have time and that's the reason I was planning to steal some weekends.
Generally, I think it could be fun but that's if she doesn't run you into a head on collision with a trailer