₦airaland Forum

franchasng:
Dear Seun, they are gradually pushing you towards self destruction of your forum oh


This is a public forum, this blocking feature will kill the fun of the forum. A forum is not a private space where people come to seek for solitude or privacy, it's a public space for sharing diverse opinions on issues of life.


This feature is not needed on the forum, if I am to advice you, shelve the idea asap.


Add dislike button.


If it is possible, let the comment that gets the highest number of likes or upvote be automatically moved to the first comment after the original post.



And then consider monetization of old accounts' posts and threads

This is not a real comment.

Even in real life, you can block people.

Abeg make person block me, I wan test this feature.

Ibiyemo is a fool that no one should listen to.

If not bearing a child is a sin, then Jesus is a sinner.

GloriousGbola:
you are actually the one at fault here imho - because you have chosen to outsource everything related to the children to your wife., how often do you go grocery shopping? do you take the children with you when you do this? do you go with them to school to buy books or school uniform? why would you give your wife the money to pay for school fees when you can do this yourself?


how often do your children come to disturb you about an assignment they have to do, or worn out shoes or bag, etc? do you pay attention? do you buy your kids school supplies, or clothes? do you know what they are into? do they ever come to talk to you about anything? you have to actively build a relationship with your children, and the earlier you do it the better

if you have decided to play the role of an atm only dont be surprised that that is what you are seen as. you can complain that women manipulate children against their fathers - but lazy men walk right into it when they completely remove themselves from any part of running the home/ family.

but this is not tensas story. tensa's story is one of active indifference by his father. there is no need to pretend that being a father automatically conveys a sense of responsibility onto an individual. you have to actively be a part of your children's lives on every level.
children can also see when their parents are struggling, even if they don't fully understand at the time.

thats why you hear people say - our parents did the best they could. tensa is saying - his dad did not do that. his dad did nothing.

Your head is very very correct.

Treadway:
I get you💯.

I was also shocked and almost wanted to comment when I saw that post at the time it was made, BUT seeing as it was a personal one to him, I didn't see the need to be the one doing defender of the universe on this topic.

I do know I heard a similar comment from one of my before babes, married and all, but brought up the comment while we were gisting on broad topics one day, literally same description..and I asked her some questions like how you take know say no be your papa dey give your mama your school fees, shey you dey there when they have those kain discussions enough to know the full picture, and other questions which she didn't give satisfactory answers for , but since na her papa she dey call useless, I decided there was no need to drag things further, BUT I made some changes following that conversation. Prior to that conversation, I would always send money for school fees and upkeep money to my wife, who then would pay to the school and all that. So to the school and to my kids, na Mrs D dey pay. It hit me that just like my former babe, my kids, the school, the market people, the street people we buy things from, all get trfs from my wife, and hypothetically if things were to go south between us, no one would believe that I was the one funding everything. They would believe her. How many people I go show bank statements say I have been bankrolling every as a responsible father and head of the home? That day I sat my daughters who were both less than 5 at the time and told them explicitly the role I play as the financier of everything as far as the home is concerned, and got my wife to also corroborate same, and for every single thing I do, my wife tells them so they say Daddy thank you. Beyond just care, I saw clearly that I also need to let them know what I do for them, not cos I need their thanks, but just so one child will not grow up to believe my mummy was paying for everything. Till today I send the school fees directly and they bring the school receipt to me, not my wife o, my kids gangan. It appears if you don't toot your horn, you run the risk of being grossly misjudged..............not talking about the deadbeat dads

Then there is the place of dads who are struggling and doing the best they can with the cards they have been dealt. Life's full of ups and downs. If you know a man is doing all he can, he shouldn't be despised cos he isn't rich. If you know a man is working assiduously to provide something, no matter how small, the size of the heart is what should matter, not the gift......

Uncle Henry na the richest person wey I know as per family ties. Has been in Mobil since 2000., bro is mad liquid. His younger sister a radiographer is in the UK. Their baby of the house, na Facebook she meet the person wey marry am, came in from the USA, wife am and carry am go. She don born three now....but they grew up even poorer than us..his mum fried those coconut chips they boil with sugar by the roadside, their dad got retrenched at some point from Nepa. Man was doing what he could, but na mum's petty business proceeds was at least 60% of what funded the family and Uncle Henry university bills for Ife. She was the one bringing in the bread for some time. Same in my family, for a good number of years my mum too was the one bringing in the bread, but in both cases our dads were doing whatever they could to add something, albeit little to the bread. Today, and for many years now sef, for both families, we are all nowhere near poor.

Say person poor today, no mean say he no fit bench you tomorrow. Seen it play out so many times, so I try as much as possible not to dismiss or despise those who are struggling.

Are you a writer?

deltateam:
Why be say people raised on ogogoro don't hear word?

Including Wike their grand Patron.

See where you hang ball.

Maybe you should not have married Iya Ologogoro's daughter.

See wahala untop marriage.

So if it is crytpo project, it is web 3?

What is it with men and crying at wedding these past few days.

folake4u:
Hi Karleb,

The definition of Rape is inconsistent between governmental health organizations, law enforcement, health providers, and legal professions. It also has its meaning according to each jurisdiction.

In Nigeria, Rape is the unlawful carnal knowledge of a girl/woman without her consent, or with her consent through threats or intimidation or fear of harm......

Our Nigerian laws do not provide the meaning of Rape to be gender neutral and is based on the concept that only a woman can be raped.

The sections of the Criminal and Penal Code buttress further that rape can only be committed by a man against a woman and not vice versa.

Section 357 of the Criminal Code Act applicable in the Southern part of Nigeria, defines rape as follows;

“Any person who has unlawful carnal knowledge of a woman or girl without her consent, or with her consent, if the consent is obtained by force or by means of threats or intimidation of any kind, or by fear of harm, or by means of false and fraudulent representation as to the nature of the act, or in the case of a married woman, by personating her husband, is guilty of an offence which is called rape.”

Section 282 of the Penal Code which is applicable in the Northern part of Nigeria defines rape as follows;

“(1) A man is said to commit rape who … has sexual intercourse with a
woman in any of the following circumstances:- (a) against her will; (b)
without her consent; (c) with her consent, when her consent has been
obtained by putting her in fear of death or of hurt; (d) with her
consent, when the man knows that he is not her husband and that her
consent is given because she believes that he is the man to whom she
is or believes herself to be lawfully married; (e) with or without her
consent when she is under fourteen years of age or of unsound mind.
(2) Sexual intercourse by a man with his own wife is not rape, if she has attained to puberty".

Thank you.

Didn't they say it is only considered as rape when it is viganal penetration. Meaning, a woman cannot rape a man?

@folake4u

Ridross:
I’m currently studying for my first degree in Statistics. I can graduate with a 2.1 effortlessly, but getting a first-class would require a bit effort. My issue is that I’m already balancing a job, plus I’m feeling lazy and unmotivated about school.

For those who have graduated and have experience about the labour market, please:

Are there any significant advantages to having a first-class over a 2.1?
Did it make a difference in your career, further studies, or job opportunities?

I need real-life experiences and opinions to convince me whether to put in the effort or just avoid unnecessary stress.

It's not overrated.

some of una wey dey laugh for here ugly pass her.

Adonisty:

What of Tpain comes to Chile for a diplomatic visit. What you gonna do

Africans hardly go to south America.

The African presidents that could even go to South America are those from portugese speaking countries like são tome e principe, Ethiopia etc. And their last stop would be Brazil.

The other thing that could take a Nigerian president to south America is the G-20 summit, of which the last stop would most likely be Rio in Brazil.

The chances of Balablu going to Chile for recreation or deplomacy is zero.

tensazangetsu20:
I think it’s why women of our generation are much more ruthless especially after seeing what our mothers have passed through. See eh, I don’t blame them one bit. It’s why I can never abuse women cause women have so much to lose if they marry a bad man. Men can easily wake up and walk away. Millions of men abandon their family everyday in Nigeria and nothing Dey happen but it’s very rare to see a woman abandon her family.

They actually need to be.

Women are naturally attached to the children
Abandoning them is very very hard for them.

They also have too much to lose if a marriage doesn't work out.

For many reasons, I am happy I am a man.

Akpaamunsi:
Another baastard has spoken. Dem plenty for this thread. This one go dey use slap dey wake him papa every morning. You will get your karma in this life, not in the afterlife. Anuofia

Omo you no get sense. Na akamu full that your brain.

Deasegun19:
My father is a deadbeat.

I wonder why my mom had to marry him, there must have been signs.

My brother, truth is, a lot of young people find it extremely hard to choose a good partner.

Infact, if you put 10 good persons and 10 bad and ask some people to choose 10 times, they will choose the bad people 10 times.

This happens to men too but for men, you can just walk away.

It's really something I can't wrap my head around but it's real.

Akpaamunsi:
All I can see here is that your mother is an evil witch. Apologies, but it is what it is. There is no way your father wouldnt have supported you to at least secondary school. A typical Anambra man will never deny his children of support, except he is financially handicapped. My children's fees right from nursery to university were all paid by me through my wife's account, but she has always made it clear to my children that their father has been the one paying their fees. I pity you and your future. A man who calls his father a fool in public is already condemned to misfortune. You are acting out of youthful exuberance, but you will learn the hard way. No wonder , you get rabbit teeth, as E be like say your papa curse done dey manifest.
Don't quote me because I won't reply you. Tufia gi. Abomination

You are a very stupid person.

The dude has a right to call any of his family members anything he likes based off his real life experience with them, not you.


I have always maintained the opinion that child support is a good thing, mind you, women pay it too. Women also pay alimony.

A lot of people are just too irresponsible to do the right thing.

If in another universe, If I become a president of any country. I would make child support 30 percent of the income of who will pay it and make it mandatory till age 30.

AdisaMighty:
“Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.— Ephesians 6:2-3

Don’t give Satan an advantage. He’s always looking for legal ground and this thread is a good evidence for him.

Nigerian Christian are ridiculous.

In this same chapter you quoted, this is the verse 4 below.

Ephesians 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

GloriousGbola:
being a father is more than climbing a woman and shooting a load

that is for lower animals

Honestly, people need to hear this often. This applies to mothers, even children too.

Marriage/parenthood is a sacred thing and should be done seriously.

You know we are destined to win this when you see ugarte and dalot on the score sheet.