₦airaland Forum

@ gabe_logan
thanks a lot.i'm watching it now.i owe you one.

@ rokiatu,
abeg help me continue the peacemaker work i've been doing.i don dey beg both sides make them cool down.them no gree.and nigeria is playing now,so i'll be back.

@ all of una civil war people,
nigeria dey play,and i don go watch.maake una cool down abeg
makle love not war.

@ gabe_logan
thank you.
i've been searching the internet to see if i can watch it,but its only argentina vs australia i dey get.

ladies and gentlemen,
please lets stop this war.
all this is too much on a sunday morning.
now we understand that the girls dont have boyfriends.
can we all have some peace now?
haven't you people noticed that babalawo that started this is nowhere to be found?

by the way,are then men not supposed to be watching the nigeria game?u people are here on nairaland inciting war with the ladies.
who fit tell the score of the match??i no fit watch am where i dey.

@ poster

ok,lets assume they don't have boyfriends.
what's the problem in that?there is nothing new or wrong in it.
do you know why they don't have boyfriends??how sure are you that they are single in the first place.
did they tell you they are looking for boyfriend?
even if they are looking for boyfriends,is this way to go about it?naming them on the internet?why don't you ask them out privately instead?
what do you hope to achieve in this?
or do you think by doing this,they will want to go with you?

@ nalijah07

as sistawoman said,not all nigerian men are like that.each man is different.
the fact that he said he will take her home doesn't mean he has no wife back home.
afterall,he hasn't take her home yet.
besides there are loads of men who have been promising their foreign ladies to "take them home soon" for years,and they haven't gone anywhere.
i cant be sure he has a wife,but if he did,he wouldn't want ur pal to know, so she couldnt have known.

@ poster

i dont think its his sister.
i beleive its his girlfriend or wife back home in nigeria.
a good number of men i know in UK have a woman back home and they date and deceive other ladies in england.
some go it just because of the papers.they can go all the way to marry the lady.
a man told me this is more common in america.

i must say here that not all men do it.but a good number of them are involved in such deceitful acts.

@ poster
dont give yourself heart attack.
since ur naija girl don dey like the oyinbo man,e no dey for your hand again.
pele.
pray make miracle happen make she no dey fond of oyinbo man again.

it is not always good to keep malice in a relationship.
you should try to be open and communicate in the relationship.
if you are hurt,tell ur partner you dont like what he did bla bla,and both of you will sort it out.
thats far better than keeping malice and corroding the relationship.
sometimes,he may not know he annoyed you.keeping malice will only make things worse.
on the other hand,being open will help build the relationship.

na wah for all una access bankers.
una oga say make una buy car wey una no want by force.una no do anything.u come dey talk about am for forum.
na so fear grip una reach?
e be like una no be graduates at all.
you are more of muppets.u can not say no to something because you are afraid.
e dey for una employment contract wey u sigh say una go buy car wey dem choose for una??
u better wake up and stand for your rights because this is just the begining.
as damola don talk,they will soon ask you people to buy an aeroplane by force.

@ spikedcylinder
true.

what of lecturers?i think they are more or equally as flirtatious as the other three being discussed.

@ spikedcylinder,
abeg share your experience(s) with us.
maybe i fit learn some tactics from the experience.

@ rampant

come to think of what u said about doctors and flirting,i think you must be right.
the nature of their job does requires them to flirt.
na true u talk o.
eeya, and its too late for me to follow another career path.
i for change to become doctor

all men flirt.some just complain because their setting does not really expose them to women.
doctors, bankers,military men flirt because they have access to women.researchers dont cos they spend so much time in the laboratories.
so do teachers,lecturers,politicians.
on the other hand,researchers dont cos they spend so much time in the laboratories,not because their nature inclines then not to flirt.
it really depends on the man,not the profession.

perhaps i should refer you to calabar women.
they seem to have a way of making their men addicted to them.
they'll give u better srategy.
but in my opinion i think he'll be addicted if u do the following.
good food
good sex
good conversation skills
no nagging
massages
cheerful disposition always.

@ poster
i'm not trying to sound insensitive,but i think your cousin should leave the relationship while she still can.
i see problems all over it.
the guy is SS which means he will be falling sick from time to time with crises and all the sort.Besides,sicklers rarely live to their mid thirties (my dad is a doctor,so i know some medical stuff).
on top of it all,he seems to be obviously diabetic.
thats double wahala for your cousin.
this is a case of a perfect storm brewing.
things like blood oaths and the like are dangerous things to dabble into.if a lady asks me to take an oath,i will run for my life.
she should not allow herself to be tricked into a very problematic relationship.
i will advise your cousin to save herself a life of trouble and move on.
the guy can kill himself if he likes.

@ poster
i don't think i will be able to stand a snorer in the long term.
i for one am a light sleeper and i wouldn't want to be woken up on a regular basis in the middle of the night by one partner who snores,cos i might not be able to sleep that night again.
besides,i think snoring underlines a medical problem.maybe the throat are partly blocked with mucus or something more serious,so it will be better if my partner checks herself out.

@ poster,
but u are partly responsible for all this.
the man made it clear from the start he wanted a relationship.
you said no but encouraged the phonecalls,and even enjoyed the chats,bla bla bla.
dont you it can easily be interpreted any the guy that u r just playing hard to get?

look at it from this angle.
a girls fancies ur man right from the word go.he says sorry i'm involved,but he actively calls and encourages discussions with the lady,and enjoys the conversations.
what can you infer from the above scenario.

next time dont encourage such calls and closeness from men who make it clear they want you.

@poster
the fact that u r putting this post about him means that u have fallen in love with him (or falling for him).
God don catch u.
U wanted to eat ur cake and have it,but awoof don run belle.
all this ur "i dont want to contact him" again will only make you think of him more.
u better reestablish contact with him and let things be normal because
i'm sure this ur strategy will only make u fall in love faster.

@ poster
if i ask her out on a date,then i'll be prepared to pay.
if we are in a relationship,i'll still have no problems paying,but i'll expect her to at least offer to share the bills from time to time.
i may or may not accept her offer,but the fact that she offered to pay part of the bill will say a lot about her,
and score her great points.

flesh to flesh is one of the risks we all are going to take at some point in our lives.
no matter how careful you are,you are at some point going to do flesh to flesh.
all you can do is pray that u dont catch something nasty.
its all part of life.

@ poster
you can't make a girl fall for you or whatever.
she will either want you or she will not.
if she doesn't want you,do yourself a favour and move on.
go look for someone else.

@ poster

there is this generalization that nigerian girls abroad are loose,have lost morals,etc;and that is why most men prefer the home-based girls.
from my observation,i think that notion is not entirely true.
sure there are several immoral girls out there,but there are also some very good girls;even better than the homebased ladies.
i think because these man have been with several loose naija girls here,they think all foreign based naija girls must be like that.
there are cases of men marrying foreign-based naija girls and having very happy lives,and there are cases of men going to marry home-based girls and they regret it bitterly.
just as there are loose foreign-based girls,there are rotten home-based girls.
personally i would not mind a foreign-based naija lady as long as she is a good girl and has morals,even if she has been abroad all her life.
i strongly beleive that there are really good naija girls abroad.
they are just not easy to find;-probably cos they are quiet and not as loose as the immoral ones.

@ poster

there is no need to be confused.
your case dey very simple.
if you are AS,you should not marry AS. Simple.
unless u want to tempt fate.
if u risk am go born sicker picken,then your eye go open.

if u be AA,then give us more info,we go fit help you decide.

@ poster,
its a bit hard to say if somthing is fishy yet,based on what you have written;though it is not impossible.
since he told you to come to his house,then it should indicate that he has nothing to hide,otherwise he wont give you the freedom to come to his house.
if he asked you not to come to his house,then i would say something is very fishy.
it is possible he could be very busy during the daytime,and you always get him at the wrong period when he is with colleagues.
as regards the not calling back,and his not picking your calls in the evening is where i smell something.
perhaps he is begining to take you for granted??
perhaps you call too often and he is begining to feel suffocated??
perhaps he just wanted to sleep with you and he has done that and wants out??
its a bit hard to tell.
maybe you should meet him face to face and express your concerns.;and hear what he has to say
a bit of open communication between the two of you can do wonders.
but let your studies be number one.as you said,there are other suitors out there.

@ nailajah07
even michelin89 that is a lady cannot stand her.
i think the wife is the cause of everything.she's boring.
i could be wrong,but there doesn't seem to be any excitment around the wife.
as i said earlier,the lady should make efforts to make the man start confiding with her.
infact she is even lucky.if the outside women was bad,she would have seduced and slept with the man.

@ poster
if you are talking about conversational closeness,i dont see where the cheating is yet.
they may be just close.some people feel comfortable discussing marital issues with close friends.
besides,are you sure the wife is not the nagging type?
obviously that closeness may lead to sex which is then cheating,but as long as there hasn't been any sex,no one has cheated yet.
it's up to the wife to find ways to make the man start confiding in her more and less with the outside woman.
even if they talk for 10 hours everyday,as long as they have not had sex,or kissed or romantic intimacy,then no one has cheated yet,in my view.

i think you should not have snooped on her phone in the first place.
you should trust her and respect the fact that she is still entitled to some privacy.
even married women get asked out,so there really is no big deal in in her colleague asking her out.it happens often.
besides,she did (or has) not accepted.
i think your snooping round will only make her not love you as before because she would feel you dont trust her or something.
i personally never look at their phones,and i would not appreciate a lady spying on my phone either.
there has to be some trust and respect of the privacy in a relationship.

@poster
i get song for you

"winner o o o winner"
"winner o o o winner"
"winner you don win o winner"
"papapata u go win forever winner"

now wey we don gree say na you cool pass,wetin u go come do about am?

@mohawkchic
i no think say him dey self assured
e be like say him dey look for attention, or maybe babe
self assured people no feel the need to dey put this kind post.