I don't know why I read this at midnight. No, it's not horrific, it's just funny how darkness fuels grief. I can only hope, ngaz, that no part of this piece will fail to be fiction. Shock me, did this happen? I've heard a lot about epileptic seizures but this is the first time I'll witness one. Your descriptions are just as vivid as it would be if I watched one two yards away from where I stand, if they are not a little bit more.

I'd have loved to point out a few things I noticed that you might want changed if you did too, but I feel morally obliged not to do that until I have your permission. This might just mean so much more to you than commas and full stops.

KOKOwonder:
Few hours from now (tomorrow) is my crush's birthday I need a romantic birthday poem to make her feel me. amberacious, jigsawkillah, cuddlemii, the agba, llaykorn, krystalzkris you guys should help your number one fan pls. Her name is Elizabeth.

I'm just seeing this. I hope you were able to get a poem that made her feel you. And, please be fast about it and change her from 'crush' to 'wife'.

timpaker:
The Shot (Emotions)

Far across the desert sea of Sambisa
Lays an inland of crime bustling militia
Wielding tools that coughs out death,
To it we crawled with our four chained-legged monster
On the wrinkled naked sands with a mask of bravery,
Hiding the fear of failure that glows on our faces.

Like a duck we caravanned into our mission
Snipping a tattered militia in a ragtag 'danshaki',
His head headed his heap of shield and his eyes glued
To the wall behind; death was alive once again,
As it took lives at ease in its theater of thunderous applauds.
We shot into their defenses, causing a pandemonium
which exposes their desperation and lack of control.

A young lass in hijab as if immune to bullets
Flung towards us crying, she seemed lost -
Her steps steep the ground in a somewhat compass of confusion;
Our guns stopped talking. Our emotions overwhelmed our gun's lips -
It kisses pause! But she ran and hugged a soldier
Whose waiting arms fell out the sky like a butcher's chop.
Twelve soldiers were killed by suicide - Oh young lass!

Again, our bullets sang our pain into their end,
Their decimation became easy with a stain of anger in us.
Then another lass sprouted out in the open,
A modus somehow similar to the first.
My comrades again hesitated and kissed pause.
Private Oche dunt his rifle at her, she fell...
And my trigger clinched my finger to let out a shot
To her stomach pouring out her duodenum.
We watched her struggle to breathe till her life was gone.
But on searching her hijab, she had no suicide vest on....


My shot killed an unarmed girl...............

The last line had a tear in my eye. Shot is a collection of beautifully heartbreaking pieces. Chance made me check; I never knew you added to the first poem. Please don't stop this. There are still too many stories to tell of unforgettable shots.

Fempire. Is it only a coincidence that the word starts with the prefix fem-? This one is raw; I love it. In the line where you made a remark about the heart's possesion of photography, was that a representation for memory?

TheAgba, your signature kills me. Are you for real, man?

Oh no! There is too much magic in this poem. You stole my attention completely, and I at a point found myself following your instructions as dutifully as possible. This poem just raised my spirits a hundred levels higher. Thanks for sharing.

PS: This deserves to be on the frontpage; it will help many a battered a soul.

Amberacious! Celebrate, dear accomplished poet.

Kruzilano:
[b] ****************Three limericks*****************,[\b]

If life was a journey, will you walk for miles
If you can't give money will you lease a smile
live life its the only way you learn
°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°
When you smile let your heart and teeth be pure
You don't need the pen, a smile can end the war
Laugh it off, its a sure way to get strong
°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°′°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°
If my heart was a dartboard will you hit the bull eye
Or will you just feel reluctant and kiss it goodbye after a few tries
Give and accept love, its the only way to get young

Hi Kruzilano. This poem striked my heart in a pleasant way. Your concluding line was read over probably a hundred times. The truth is plain; only love - enough of it can make young whatever is deemed old.

This would have ended in the previous paragraph if not for your opening sentence by which you indicated that the poem is to be of three limericks. I think your idea of limerick is slightly different from mine. A limerick is a five line per stanza poem with a rhyme scheme of aabbc and it is usually humorous in nature. It's very uncommon to see limericks express strong emotions like you're trying to do in your poem. That's what knew.

Is this a variant style of the limerick just like we have for the two sonnets?

elfico:
Lovely poem. Thumbs up @Op

Thank you, sir, thank you!

OMA4U:
You are now LAYing words upon words like some bricks for a mansion of subtle poetry.

Don't go and come and be whining me, sir.

Chief, you have resurrected. What happened to your numbers, sir?

TheAgba:

The poem is just about a guy who is now in his twenties. The reference to the first "twenties" is the 1920s and the other , age range...
Boss...I wish I could lose weight but I so need it.

A poem like Lukas Graham's 7 Years Old? That's beautiful. It seems like everyone in the world is trying to lose weight. I am too, so are all the members of my family.

TheAgba:
Things happened in the twenties
Many things we do not know
A lot of them were follies
Those we have learnt to follow
Now I am in my twenties
Experience would be my show
Acting with my calories

This poem has almost fried my brain, but God The Almighty won't let it. From the first three lines, I got a story. And from the next two, I got another. There was another story in the last line. Please are you just trying to lose weight?

This is an awesome one, kester113. It's not uncommon to harbor doubts about the potentials of a member of the female folk, whether in a positive or negative direction like yours.

Your first two stanzas are beautiful. The imagery paints beautiful pictures. But, I looked up 'Tashi' and I found nothing. With your usage, I expected it to be a symbol of something significant to your theme. Have I not searched enough?

I think your third stanza, like Kruzilano rightly said, needs a little bit of modification. I'm not saying it's not poetry. But it doesn't sound rich enough (that's to me, though). Take a look at your simile in the fourth line where you wrote 'like I'm riding honda'. I have never known that people who ride Honda also wonder.

And in the fourth stanza, how is your desire godly? I don't really know how to say this, but I find the imagery in the rest of the fourth stanza a little unpolished. It's just a personal opinion, though. The concluding stanza is free to go. But, what is 'heart's rhyme'?

I saw your mention on Joseph's thread. There is some vague memory coming back over that thing we discussed way back that prompted the message, but I can't retrieve it completely. Please forgive me.

You just made me so super-proud to say I'm from Osgobo. When poetry is employed to celebrate culture, the art produced is ever a vibrantly colorful one. I enjoyed your poetry, and your analysis is right on point.

Thanks for sharing, amberacious.