₦airaland Forum

armyofone:
You are so right. And it is so unfortunate his/her thought process. They don't even care to know how she is doing, if she is paying back debts, or something. They have calculated she is a pharmacist and as such, she is automatically rich. When is this entitlement going to end?
Suze Orman once said it is what is making many people poorer than they should be. It is very common among black/African too.
The days of carrying family financial burden on
oneself is gone. Wake up and work your way up with no expectation from anyone. Talk to her yourself, tell her what you have been doing and what is going on back home.
You OP should consider helping your mom more because you never know what your sister is really going through wherever she is.

ifyalways:
Do you still need/want? I know very good ones, local(Lagos) and from Abidjan. Eitherways, they will require you to pay their bus fares/send their bus ticket to Abuja.

I wrote this here so nobody would misundertand anyone.

omoaderuwe:
if u dont mind I cn help

Teeworld13:
duh

jingh:
guidance councillor, are you new on NL ?
if no, then shut up.
I Ve been taken to d cleaner more time I can remember on NL because I support GMB, it my turn to hit below the belt of anybody that speak bad of my general.

one and last time

take a map
and
take a trip to hell

freecocoa:
Believe me, no one has this mentality of, "Being an elder doesn't give you right to misbehave" than me, I totally agree that being older doesn't mean wiser or superior, I believe that respect is reciprocal, everyone deserves respect.

Still, there is this unwritten rule about respecting elders first, MIL was wrong no doubt, she hit DIL, do you sincerely believe hitting and fighting her is the best way to go about the issue? Will you support hitting anyone back immediately without thinking twice let alone an elder? Understand that I agree MIL is at fault btw.

This is about manners, it's not just about always being right, I believe the two holy books instructed that elders/parents be honored, does the fact that mama broke a commandment mean you should break one? What makes you wiser than mama then? If this wife behaves like this already, she'll be worse than mama later on.

aflyingbird:
mirob mumu , i won't be one to hv a MIL like this when n if i ever get married , that's for sure . fortunately for me, pple don't have itchy hands where i'm at. my parents hv never even hit me talk about some MIL , no MIL will even try dis with me, she will never step foot in my house again.

aflyingbird:
like i said a gazillion times the MIL is likely not too old. wise, old and elderly folks won't behave the way the MIL did. i respect and love old pple to pieces . but if someone who's not old hits me, just because u r "older" or an MIL doesn't put u in the place to touch me. i called u a mumu and didinrin 'cus that's what u are boo

EbolaParasite:
Following your own advice, this is just your opinion as well. Apologizing does not make you good. Repeat offenders apologize all the time. It takes an ILL MANNERED AND DISRESPECTFUL person to fight an elderly person. You can twist it all you want. A woman that can beat her MIL can as well kill her husband if pushed to the limit. If you respect your husband, YOU WILL NEVER BEAT HIS MOTHER. What happened to walking away?

aflyingbird:
u keep blaming the DIL, there're many ways to prove this n dat, what about the MIL, she's the one who began hitting. if u hit anyone, don't expect them to just stand there . maybe a child will, but as an adult u don't want to be belittled by anyone, dat's just a normal response

it doesn't matter who the fukk u are. being a MIL doesn't give the audacity to hit any other adult. def not bcus of some pics, pics that weren't even hers! u don't hit someone because u don't get ur way, especially bcus of something that doesn't belong to u. n mumu, u need to reread the op. they have never gotten along . the fact that the MIL was bold enough to go into the DIL's home to cause trouble meant she has done something similar before , had her way n dat's why she's continue the behavior, bold enough to go into another woman's home n abuse her. thinking the DIL will just stand there. only difference is the DIL stood up for herself dis time . the MIL didn't like the DIL from the jump . pple will bully as long as u let them but i bet u ten bucks the MIL won't try this nonsense again.

aflyingbird:
the MIL should be respected no matter what ? RESPECT BEGETS RESPECT. if you're someone worthy of respect, pple will respect u, u won't have to demand it . resorting to violence means your being respected is questionable 'cus no gentle MIL will do what the MIL did here . and it's rubbish to say after the MIL slapped her , the wife should've gone to her room to stay . if the wife had done that she will become a doormat and punching bag with the MIL running her marriage for her , which she has no business doing. i bet u , the MIL won't try what she did again or try to bully the wife again . mirob , maybe you are a didinrin but i am not and plenty of women out there are not. who in the world does the MIL think she is to hit her and then for you to blame the wife n say she should've gone to her room and do what? hide. allow someone to be intimidated and violated in ur own home n go cry in ur room like a child ? my dear this is 2015. and your post is just rubbish.

Sophyrocks:
That is why the MIL has to slap her? What if there are no negatives to print more? what stops the MIL from asking her son about the pics? Slapping another human because of pics? Is the MIL a good initiator of peace by her actions? Is it only DILs that are to initiate peace? You see the type of dysfunctional homes we run in this 9ja.

NmaGOD44:
a good wife my foot.....how about a good MIL??....won't she be good to d DIL and not make troubles first??.....stupid

aflyingbird:
why are some of y'all blaming the wife ?
OP , ur mother wanted to take the photos, but u didn't mention her wanting to print them and bring back the original. 1) ur wife had every right to prevent her from taking the photos ( they are her photos after all ), especially if there was no mention of printing. they r child dedication photos dat mean a lot to ur wife , of course she won't let anyone take them just like that . 2) ur mother had no right to slap ur wife just 'cus ur wife said she couldn't take the pictures. why hit her? she isn't ur child neither is she a little kid to be slapped anyhow. u don't put ur hands on anyone. let's be fair here : your mother initiated this fight. ur mother had her sister n friend there so of course they will take her side, ur wife is the lone ranger dat they ganged up on , but if u ask me she is the victim . they were probably looking for a fight from the start



A mother-in-law should be respected no matter what, it happens all the time, relations, especially mothers would want a memorable picture of their grandchildren to show off, the wife has no right WHATSOEVER to fight the mother, she can only go inside her room when the mother slapped her, if it were sister in law that would have been different but mother, no way, that shows u don't have respect for your husband.
That said, Op u have been advised, just make peace between them and get them to reconcile, but warn ur wife seriously because that action of hers will make people conclude that she is not well brought up.