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Nairaland Forum / Nellychinma20's Profile / Nellychinma20's Posts
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Family / Re: Male Rape by Nellychinma20(f): 12:09pm On Apr 28, 2020 |
That part of ‘as if you didn’t enjoy it’ is what gets to me. Like why do we act like this. Moreover, this is not a Nigerian thing. I have seen it in a lot of places. The constant downplaying of male rape is what dampens the spirit of victims who are trying to speak up. It’s really pathetic. CAPSLOCKED: |
Family / Re: Male Rape by Nellychinma20(f): 12:03pm On Apr 28, 2020 |
Thanks a million. I just learnt a couple of things now. For you to help someone, they must realize they need it. You see patriarchy is a double aged sword, it kills both the oppressor and the oppressed. Cos if equality exist, men won’t suffer most things they suffer today. If there’s equality, there won’t be need to differentiate any gender’s ability to feel. We won’t overburden any gender in the aspect of provision. Parents won’t be protecting girls only from sexual predators. The list goes on and on. Ariza: 1 Like |
Family / Re: Male Rape by Nellychinma20(f): 11:57am On Apr 28, 2020 |
Subconsciously? Do you think the environment affects this? Like if you grew up in a society that tell men they are ‘used’ during sex, do you think men will still maintain this stance. I am just curious to know . Thanks GANAYAD: |
Family / Re: Male Rape by Nellychinma20(f): 11:09pm On Apr 26, 2020 |
Marriage is a partnership and it’s very important that the 2 partners have ‘common sense’. With common sense life is very easy. When it comes to decisions that affects both parties diplomacy must be involved to see that no one is constantly sacrificing their happiness for the sake of peace. I personally believe both reasonable parties must reasonably bring suggestions to the table and decide. But then what if one has better judgment and good decision making abilities, then leave it to that person. Marriage shouldn’t be a tug of war. Both parties must always look out for each other in any decision. Hope this helps GANAYAD: 1 Like |
Family / Re: How Do I Handle A Husband Who Wants To Have Sex Almost Everyday? by Nellychinma20(f): 10:59pm On Apr 26, 2020 |
God bless you. Sexism has shown Nigerian women shege ��♀️��♀️��♀️. Imagine “u are lucky” bdchange: 9 Likes |
Family / Re: Male Rape by Nellychinma20(f): 6:06pm On Apr 26, 2020 |
Jullima: The bragging part is what gets to me. I don’t see ladies bragging about having sexual relationships so early in life. This also had me wondering, are women more likely to be damaged psychologically due to abuse cos they are naturally emotional or is it because of they societal grooming? Just to buttress further, a man can brag about having a body count of 100 and applauded while a lady is shamed for having a body count of 3. Men are groomed to see sex as between 2 people “the user and the used”. When a man have sex, he somehow believes he is the one ‘using’ them and at such their ego is fueled. However, a woman is groomed to believe she is ‘used’ during sex and at such always view herself as the victim of the circumstance. Could this be why men fail to understand the concept of rape? 2 Likes |
Family / Re: Male Rape by Nellychinma20(f): 5:59pm On Apr 26, 2020 |
Oluromantic: Your opinion is valid. However, I would appreciate if you can give opinion a bit on sexual abuse against men. It will give me better understanding of 2 sides of same coin. Thanks |
Family / Re: Male Rape by Nellychinma20(f): 10:26am On Apr 26, 2020 |
What bothers me most is the sexual abuse that boys(/men) go through that is somehow swept under the carpet. Sexual abuse in any gender should be frowned at and treated with utter disdain. But then, I noticed men do not come out often to reports sexual abuse , even if it took place when they were young. Why is this so? Are you scared people will mock you? Are you aware that there are agencies that are committed to helping you get justice if you wish? My question is, does it mean boys are not sexually assaulted? Does it not affect them psychologically? Is our chauvinistic society an enabler of this form of abuse ? I am a feminist and it really saddens me to see the disservice sexism has done to men. I don’t deny that men have some privileges due to sexism but that’s story for another day. I often wonder what it must feel like to not cry because I don’t want to be labeled weak. To always give up my happiness cos I want to be a ‘man’ To not report sexual abuse cos everyone will say “didn’t you enjoy it”? I know a lot of my peers who were sexually abused but chose not to see it as such, they sort of nonchalantly dismiss it as a ‘no biggy ‘ . But then, I also know those it damaged psychologically. Are parents aware that boys are also endangered? Are you aware that ‘house boys & house girls’ sexually hunt boys, let’s not even mention aunts. Theirs is even worse in the sense that he can be penetrated anally and also asked be asked to penetrate the girl. Are we even aware that such memories taunt them for life? Please I want to know the experience of any man who was the victim of sexual assault. How did it start? Any advice for parents of today? Is there something your parents could have done better to protect you? Was the crime perpetrated by family member or strangers? How are you healing? Do you need help? Do you want to talk about it? Please open up on this thread. Sending you hugs, kisses and love. You are not the problem, you were just a victim. Your emotions are valid and you don’t have to suppress it. You have the right to be angry. 3 Likes 2 Shares |
Family / Male Rape by Nellychinma20(f): 10:25am On Apr 26, 2020 |
Please I want to know your experience. Growing up in a Chauvinistic society where men are viewed as alpha creature without emotions and at such facilitate gross neglect of their psychological well-being. The notion of men as alpha beings has done more harm than good. Men are somehow not expected to have emotions. They are not expected to cry when hurt, the society have also groomed women into viewing men as such (special note to mothers). I won’t play the blame game here, we are all victims of the environment we are born into. A man is weak when he cries. He’s not a man if he shows emotions. He’s just meant to be this being with staunch control over everything and the ability to handle it all. |
Family / Re: . by Nellychinma20(f): 3:28pm On Nov 11, 2018 |
Nairaland has been more of a blessing to me I met my partner here , we got to know from a business transaction that went beautifully well Then navigating the travel section motivated me to leave Nigeria I met a very good friend of mine here as well I am always aware of the latest news cos i get to read on nairaland Been more of a blessing 4 Likes |
Family / Re: How Oftern Do You Read Your Mails by Nellychinma20(f): 8:48am On Aug 24, 2018 |
I do that multiple times a day now But then in the past it wasn't same . |
Crime / Re: Never Forget “George Stinney Jr”, Executed 20th In USA by Nellychinma20(f): 10:32pm On Aug 16, 2018 |
OPTIMUSPRIME08: For some reason my spirit asked me not to reply u Maybe u are not worth it But if u with all ur bags loaded with sense will go read my reply to one human being ,then u might know the connection . |
Crime / Re: Never Forget “George Stinney Jr”, Executed 20th In USA by Nellychinma20(f): 10:22pm On Aug 16, 2018 |
naijatatafo: Learn to get a bigger picture of everything before u conclude I was going to talk about how yahoo boys are paying them bk but like the omini knowest ,u jumped into conclusion Mtchwww |
Crime / Re: Never Forget “George Stinney Jr”, Executed 20th In USA by Nellychinma20(f): 4:52pm On Aug 16, 2018 |
It is well I wanted to say something about yahoo boys but let me mind my business |
Family / Re: Subscribe To IROKOTV For #3000 For One Year Plan by Nellychinma20(f): 9:45am On Aug 13, 2018 |
Psub:how do i subscribe please ? |
Family / Re: Subscribe To IROKOTV For #3000 For One Year Plan by Nellychinma20(f): 2:43pm On Aug 12, 2018 |
One question plssss Does this app work in Nigeria only ? |
Celebrities / Re: Rich Kids Of Miami by Nellychinma20(f): 2:35pm On Aug 12, 2018 |
Wow So much hate on a thread Y'all need to learn to accept ppl the way they are . Everyone must not be like u If u choose to be secretive ,that's ur bizzz ,pls allow others to flaunt whatever they want LUCAS99 pls keep it up ,i love this . It motivated me 100% |
Crime / Re: Khensani Maseko's Last Post Before Committing Suicide After Rape By Boyfriend by Nellychinma20(f): 12:45pm On Aug 08, 2018 |
[quote author=Adebowale89 post=70084632] you can still tell your mom to close her legs to avoid another olosho like you grown up |
Crime / Re: Khensani Maseko's Last Post Before Committing Suicide After Rape By Boyfriend by Nellychinma20(f): 12:44pm On Aug 08, 2018 |
Hanseel1: Lol I pity ur mum sha |
Crime / Re: Khensani Maseko's Last Post Before Committing Suicide After Rape By Boyfriend by Nellychinma20(f): 11:46pm On Aug 07, 2018 |
Adebowale89:If only ur dad knew ,he would hv used condom that year |
Crime / Re: Khensani Maseko's Last Post Before Committing Suicide After Rape By Boyfriend by Nellychinma20(f): 11:44pm On Aug 07, 2018 |
Adebowale89: |
Crime / Re: Khensani Maseko's Last Post Before Committing Suicide After Rape By Boyfriend by Nellychinma20(f): 11:38pm On Aug 07, 2018 |
handsomeguy4kyf:Bitch ass fellow Get a life Miserable being |
Crime / Re: Khensani Maseko's Last Post Before Committing Suicide After Rape By Boyfriend by Nellychinma20(f): 11:36pm On Aug 07, 2018 |
franchasng: Wow You are sooooo sick Bunch of wreck Wow God forgive u May a similar fate befall u . |
Crime / Re: Please help, I was scammed! (Land Grabbers) Omoniles by Nellychinma20(f): 8:49pm On Aug 06, 2018 |
adecz: If only u put so much attention into a business U won't be where u are now |
Travel / Re: The Road To Ireland by Nellychinma20(f): 6:38pm On Jul 29, 2018 |
Kingzy4pep:ok Best of wishes . 1 Like |
Romance / Re: Pre-wedding Photos Of Man And His Wife-To-Be Who Is A Basketballer by Nellychinma20(f): 3:53pm On Jul 29, 2018 |
CANDYDADDY:Wow!!!!!!! Na this one u come life come do ? Its appalling Get a life and stop body shaming women |
Travel / Re: The Road To Ireland by Nellychinma20(f): 3:30pm On Jul 29, 2018 |
Kingzy4pep: No, i was not asked to certify any document . I just assumed they did that themselves . Moreover it seems they contacted my school directly to email them my transcript even after submission . What's TCD? |
Travel / Re: The Road To Ireland by Nellychinma20(f): 7:30am On Jul 23, 2018 |
Fwesh101:No,i didn't write anyEnglish exam till the school showed me their English requirements . Secondly,where is it possible to pay tuition when u have not been offered admission which invariably means u are not a student of the school ? Lastly,forget what my account looked like and focus more on how much is needed for the tuition and maintainance which they stated as €7000 which is around #3,000,000 .However the naira equivalence is subject to FX rate at any given time . Attached is a copy of my offer letter from the school ,stating the English language requirement . Will not post everything here as i wouldn't want any criminal to take on fraudulent acts with it . Hope this helps 4 Likes |
Travel / Re: The Road To Ireland by Nellychinma20(f): 9:36am On Jul 22, 2018 |
2 Likes |
Travel / Re: The Road To Ireland by Nellychinma20(f): 6:51am On Jul 22, 2018 |
Kingzy4pep:Thanks for answering that question |
Family / Re: "My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home" The True Story by Nellychinma20(f): 6:27am On Jul 21, 2018 |
Moral of the story The poor should marry the poor and vice versa You marry someone with same background as u ,then u already know what to expect . Nonsense and ingredienss If i call u pussy man now .... 1 Like |
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