₦airaland Forum

Anyone tell me wat other forum is interesting? Am getting bored here on this!!

Radiant:
The same thing weh carry you come

I don dey fear u now!! Well as dem talk am--Birds of the same feather ----------- u know de rest!!

candylips:
a female will be able to answer this

These days no be only female who fit answer oh!! Trust males too !! :DLOL

sara j:
Leliah

I wish you all the best in the
future. Do not take any notice
of what the people on this forum
think. They are just jealous. The
only reason they can comprehend
a marriage between a Nigerian and
a non Nigerian is because of papers
which is not true!!
Love is very universal.
I know of a a few beautiful white
women married to Nigerian men(my
mother included)

After 30 yrs and 6 children together(ranging
from 11 - 28) my parents marriage is very
real and genuine.

WEll said and very true sara!!

Leilah:
Sara J's mam n dads story is genuine, they met through the missionaries I think. Thats so sweet Sara, you are a lucky girl to have your mam n dad together cos sadly its very very rare.

Maybe i'll be one of those cases very soon pls God, got our house (well he did) and put the deeds in both names. He took me to Nigeria too twice. I aknowledge however in the interim that we are from two very different cultures but we compromise. I do all the cooking (all the Nigerian stuff) then he minds the child if I have to do something he even hoovers sometimes and I never asked!!! ha ha ha.

But no one knows what the future holds.

Leilah, there are not just a few but many such mixed marriages which workout so well. Like you said no one knows the future and also not all same race or same religion marriages work as well. If you both make it work it will.

Radiant:
Her request is for a divorce. If she was really serious to get it done with she wouldn't even think of placing ads. Who does that?

That is why I have told her to find a good lawyer in Naija who will organize everything for her but in case she is still in two minds then let her try--though she will be wasting her time. At least she will satisfy herself--and not feel guilty in the future.

Anyway wetin u day look for here??  

chic2pimp:
Well,you got that part right. Na so so yab full NL.

The "yabis" never kill anyone till date on NL or in even in real life!! So make una continue to "YAB" all u want!! Otherwise NL go put me to sleep!!

rita@NL:
Criticism makes me run a check on myself valid or not ,there is alwaz an element of truth in it.Most time I cry but it has alwaz bring the best out of me.

Very nice way to look at things BUT please never CRY as you should use it to reflect and learn if valid. If not just ignore.

Fhemmmy:
I dont think she really wanted the divorce, i thnk she is more into looking for the dude and live together happily ever after again.

Is this a ploy to find out his whereabout?? Is this what you are saying?? Not impossible but let us take her for her words and advise accordingly. If she finds him and makes it work then why not? If not then let her try at least before cutting the strings completely!!

quote author=Kadin link=topic=334222.msg4688095#msg4688095 date=1254946925]
Hi
I've been separated from my Nigerian husband for years and finally want to get a divorce. He hasn't answered any emails for over a year and I only have rumours of his whereabouts. My lawyer wants me announce my intention of divorce through an ad in a Nigerian newspaper. Which one would you recommend? His family is from Lagos, but I think he's somewhere in the UK now. Since he is not cooperating anyway, there really is no need to actually find him,
Thanks for any suggestions.
[quote][/quote]Get a good lawyer in Naija to organize all for you--will cost you but will be done!!

agathamari:
you are gonna have issues with his family. traditionally Indians do not accept non indians as spouces. if his family is of modern ideals then no issue but you can say the same here. tradiionalist will look down on you and the relationship in both areas

I can tell you one thing--Traditional Indians and Nigerians have more in common and more likely to accept eachother. The reason being that both have cultural values that are similar eg family values, social values, CULTURE of respect in family, Loyalty to partner, etc. In a way the culture of both is older and similar than the religious issues being raised here. Traditional Nigerian religion is also very similar to Hinduism, Islam, and Traditional Christianity. I am not talking of fanatics or extremists views of some in the name of religion who are not representative of their true faith-be it Islam, Hinduism or Xtianity.

The most important thing is the two people involved --LOVE can overcome any issues.

Mac wat??  NOT for me!!

I prefer the HOT Akara and Moin-moin with Pap from mama shola's sitting under the mango tree!!
Instead of Milk shake i enjoy fresh palmwine!!

Try Fried Snail and akara with pepper dip and original palm wine from Edo state!!
Since I tried it 40 years ago and i still dey with my partner!!LOL

kasyula:
Thanks for your reply,

I'm having a WORKING HOLIDAY VISA. Unlike the tourist, it allows someone to stay in the UK for a full 2 years, but engaging only in 12 months employment.
Thats why I'm asking if I'm obligated to buy it. The fact is I will be travelling to and from Italy whilst in the UK, but then not knowing the exact date I cannot risk spending money on a ticket that will create an hindrance in the future.

Thanks once more for the advice.

joe

Take no chances man, just buy return open dated (slightly more expensive).

Radiant:
I just hate the whole pushy and forceful attitude. Let's not even talk about the 'Lords righteous ones' now. I mean, the overzealous ones that think u can't spell "Bible".
Seriously, I've had enough of Nigerian churches. Uff! There's just so much to talk about

I also do not like the "Bible Bashers" or those with a BA /holier than all types. BUT I would not generalize or say MOST Nigerian Churches are like that. At the end it is where or what makes you feel comfortable(including the crowd at the church).

Outstrip:
I cannot speak for the whole of africa but for Nigerian churches I can clearly say that most of them are what I call modern day pharisees. It is not the all inclusive doctrine that Jesus taught. When people used to tell me about how Nigerians talk I used to go here they come again until I joined my church. I don't want to say much because even the Pastor has suffered in the hands of "christian" folks because he is a different tribe. When you throw other people in the mix then maybe Nigerians will not feel like it is their space and start to make the usual trouble they enjoy making with each other. It is a different feel I get in my sisters church where there are nigerian, ghanaian and american pastors.

At the end of the day you go to church because of GOD and not any pastor or other member. If you feel uncomfortable in any gathering the you can opt for where you feel comfortable. I was comparing churches that are all Nigerian/African with the typical Western(USA/UK) Church. Your sister's church has Nigerians and Ghanaians so that will make a positive difference.

.

Radiant:
Nigerian churches almost choke you with their "love". No, thank you! Other things I won't mention.

House of GOD is meant to be full of LOVE. What do you have against Love?? You take however much love you need--- no one forces you to take more than you want

throttler:
well, i could die from seeing a snake, i have watched too many indian films about sunita , and her toooooooooo many cobras. so anyone i know thats going to india, will be put under lock and key by moi!. apart from the snakes, i will say 'ride on and marry him jare', but nope!, its all about the deadly snakes . minus snakes+india=no marriage( this na simultaneous equation)

Make u no fear snake jare!! Just see Babalawo for the power of Eshu to help you deal with sunita snake!!

Radiant:
I think the 'perfect' Nigerians should actually acknowledge they're Nigerian so that they can show other Nationals good example instead of mask their identity.

Where I wouldn't go though is a Nigerian Church. Been there, done that, not impressed!

You can get all types of Nigerian Churches, BUT MOST are indeed very good and are more wellcoming and supportive of their members compared to the typical church in the western world. They are what a church should really be about--supporting its membership and all who come to it. In fact African churches are much more closer to the true christian doctrine compared to others. There are a few that are simply commercial ventures.

Radiant:
Seems your brain is roasting already

I had a feeling you will be the first to comment on my posting!!
And I was right!

I luv my poundo and no roast and spuds of any kind can replace that!!

If she gives me Sunday roast instead of pounded yam and egusi!!

Only a clone of my partner!! (that too only if I am not aware that the clone is a clone!!)

NOTHIN fit make me leave am Oh!!!  ( she is watchin me type !!LOL)

Theblessed:
[b]Well, just to add that Indians and Nigerians just as the BRITISH (their mother) are OPPORTUNISTS.  They never invest where they would not gain something in return, period. 

Indians are as SMART if not smarter than Nigerians in this aspect. It's not really their thing or easy for them to marry a BLACK WOMAN.  Yes, some have done it but how many? I need the statistics, now. For an Indian man to hook on a Nigerian beau, there must be something fishing - he must have seen opportunity for himself and he would grab it like a HAWK.  Its seems that my sister who wants to go down South, is not quite exposed in world events and the Indian sub-continent otherwise, she would have realised that 'Home is sweeter home'.

Aside the above, religion might be an issue here.  You are probably a Christian, a Moslem or hidden.  But have you considered your Fiance's Religion (HINDUISM) and their 110 gods to worship? Or is he a Christian or Moslem? It's fine if you want to convert to that Religion - no problems but if you have no wish to, I suggest you think seriously about it because, once you married him, your children will be raised in Hindu religion whether you approved or not and that can raise KATAKATA in the family and you would be kicked out and you would loose out as Indian Family Laws are exactly like Nigerians - no financial handshake here. You just go home to your PAPA and MAMA no questions asked. Imagine you returning home to Nigerian like the Biblical Prodigal son! Pity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Remember, they have very, very large family too to ensure you're sent home, quick.  Maybe, your plans are to marry him and stay in Nigeria instead of going to India to live that might be good for you - at least, you can keep an eye on things and ensure your own wishes are respected otherwise, it might be an issue.     

Secondly, your Indian in-laws would never fully accept you and your children as part and parcel of the family as they only accept their own.  They even do it to their own children married to White women here and we do hear how the grandchildren from these marriages are made to feel second best in their own father's family.  For all the ills about Nigeria, I am proud of Nigeria in this aspect - Nigeria accepts all her WARTS AND ALL because they understand that, you never know tomorrow. Hear this now, everywhere you go in the world, people are bound to discriminate in terms of tribe,race, religion, sex, age etc however, Indians are the first in the queue when it comes to questions of race discrimination. Ironically, they are usually the first to cite race discrimination in ISSUES concerning them with other groups. Having listen to all the advice here, it's up to you!! Good luck![/b]

Blessed, You do have good intentions BUT are wrong to generalize.  Actually most mixed marriages between Indians  and Nigerians are more long lasting compared to any other mixed marriages. I am in one and we been married 20 years and we live half the year in Nigeria and the other half in India. We both get on well with eachother's families and we cut across religion and racial boundaries easily. What maters most in any relationship is the two people involved. Yes you might have seen some families who oppose marriages across race and religion but NOT all. In every country you will find people who are narrow minded and are ignorant. My best friend is a Yoruba boy who is married to a Hausa girl and her family initially were against it but in the end accepted it. I have another pal who is BINI and could not even marry an Ibo girl because of opposition  from relatives. I also know of Indians who could not marry Nigerians because of parental or family opposition from both sides. There are always some who will be locked in their views but the world is changing and there have always been mixed marriages. One needs to be open minded.

Radiant:
Everyone please read my posts on page 7 of this thread.

I only joined this topic very recently and i must say it is indeed quite interesting and does get people talking.

I agree with what Radiant said in her post--Let us all respect eachother's views and preferences and it is ONE WORLD,ONE HUMANITY, and LOVE all the way.

Sure do, as they are most warm and friendliest people on earth. They do know how to enjoy life and are very cool about everything. They are also very proud of who they are.

Radiant:
Yea, sure! Blame the men for being weak and blame the women for being weak as well. Nonsense! Turn your brain on man.

So who or what do you blame? Who ever you blame--it has to be a weakness. If either or both are strong then all is fine.
I rest my case as you are right( na u win as u be the strong one)!!

phuck_NL:
u be primary school drop out. So lagos was barren in ancient times abi? What about the original badagry slaves? the isale eko people? are they not from lagos. abi u think lagos was mapped out like israel?

I stand to be corrected as I be drop out BUT before dropping out I learnt that EKO (as Lagos was originally called in the BINI language derived from OKO) has always been a land of settlers. It was the AWORI yorubas who came from Ile Ife earliest, followed by the BINI'S and then other tribes.  The other yorubas then followed.

The Badagry slaves are fairly recent arrivals( around the 1840? onwards) after aboliton of slavery. I am in no way comparing EKO to Israel. EKO has a far "older" history than Israel as we know today.  Even though Badagry slaves settled in EKO they according to history were originally not from EKO area.

EKO is unique in that way. You have the Brazilian link(Aguda's), Ketu link (the Ogu's), and the modern Ogun link(Ijebu's).

EKO (LAGOS)  has a unique history of settlers from as far back as history can tell us.

I stand to be corrected if wrong.

Radiant:
Stop being a Arrow. Use your brain and stop being a mere creature.

Quote the full statement: You missed the first part--"It takes two to Tango"

I am not making any excuses for anyone just stating the fact that both men and women are to blame!!

Radiant:
You sound just as confused

WOMEN fit confuse any man!! Una get the power to change us!! LOL

THE AMAKA:
and again, a way to blame it on women.
but anyway, sha.

I no dey blame women alone!! All I am saying --as oyinbo dey talk am " it takes two to TANGO"

BUT make women take the lead and unite against us men and show us the way---we men are weak by Nature!! make una stop to folow us married men and we will be forced to change!!LOL

Pass a bill that will stop POLICE from being so corrupt and all problems will be solved!!

How can anyone be from LAGOS OR ABUJA Una no get village where u fit trace origin from?? Even if dem born u for Lagos dat no mean say u no get village!!