₦airaland Forum

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Okon, a JSS 1 student of one community primary school(name withheld) in Akwa Ibom was absent from school for two days, Wednesday and Thursday. Today Friday, he came to school.

While handing out exam papers today, his class teacher, Mrs. Effiong Ekaete, sighted Okon and the following heated discussion ensued.


Mrs Efiong: Okon why didn't you come to school on Wednesday?

Okon: I washed my underpants after school on Tuesday but it couldn't dry before Wednesday so I couldn't come to school.

Mrs. Effiong: Ok. What about Thursday?

Okon: Miss, I started for school and as I passed your house I saw your seven underpants drying on the line, so I thought you would not be going to school.”

Mrs. Effiong Ekaete fainted.

http://naijokpot..com/2014/12/funny-friday-teachers-panties-stops.html

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Barely a month after a scientific report which claimed that staring at a woman's breast can add extra years to a man's life stormed the internet, another report has surfaced. This time around, it is for women's consumption. Too bad

https://www.standardmedia.co.ke/images/tuesday/magu021214.jpg

Different versions of the story about the deaths of two Kenyan couples, Paul and Lydia(pictured above), as well as the disappearance of their children have multiplied with some neighbors claiming it was a ritualistic sacrifice for TB Joshua's Church.

According to Kenyan police, Paul's passport shows that Paul has traveled to TB Joshua's Synagogue Church Of All Nations (SCOAN) about 20 times since 2009. He is said to be a strong member of the church.

Lydia Wangui, 30, was found badly mutilated near Paradise Lost along Kiambu road Nairobi. Paul Magu, 35, is said to have jumped onto the road along Thika-Garisaa highway where he died instantly. Currently, three of their children are missing.

According to a Kenyan news site, Standard Media, The kids went missing on Tuesday after the bodies of their parents were found in separate locations in Nairobi and Thika. They were identified as Allen,9, Ryan, 8, and Tiffany Muthoni, 5. The police suspect that Paul may have killed the wife on 23rd November in their house after he sent their house-help to town twice for shopping. Bloodstains were also found in their bedroom. After killing the woman, her body was burnt outside their house and later put in a sack waiting for disposal the following day. On November 24, the mutilated body was discovered near Paradise Lost along Kiambu Road in Nairobi. On Wednesday 26th November, Paul's body was discovered on the Thika-Garissa high way near Ngoliba where police believe he had committed suicide after jumping onto a speeding bus. In another development, one of the missing kids, Tiffany Muthoni, was reported to have been burnt with sulphuric acid and dumped in a coffee farm.

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The spelling error was identified immediately by the police staff who received the new batch of police vehicles, which came already completed with livery from the manufacturer.

The manufacturer who supplied about one dozen of police vehicles to the UK police said that there was nothing wrong with the police cars.

The car manufacturer defended himself via twitter claiming that ‘It’s because I is inside,’ and ‘Policing is about team work. No I in team’. The guy has been arrested by the police for changing the spelling of their name.

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Terrorists' plans to blow up planes this Christmas is thought to involve them smuggling explosives into passenger planes going to major cities.

The threat might lead to outright ban on all hand luggage, mobile phones and electronic devices.



Wahala dee ooo. ...



http://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/541725/REVEALED-Al-Qaeda-plot-to-blow-up-5-European-passenger-jets-in-Christmas-spectacular

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Yesterday Sunday, a 42 year old Florida man, Michael Watkins, told police he shot his mother with a gun and a bow-and-arrow and then stabbed her because he claimed she stole his diamonds and also gave his father cancer.

Children playing at a Sydney beach Sunday stumbled across the body of a baby buried under the sand, Australian investigators said, just a week after a newborn was found crying at the bottom of a roadside drain.

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starlingbawa:
@OP: I like your sense of humour! How funny

Thanks.

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Source: www..com/2014/11/top-10-popular-and-influential.html?m=1

North and wahala. Comic relieve, see aunty linda ikeji jumping in bikini wear here

https://www.bellanaija.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Pastor-Chris-Okotie-July-2014-BellaNaija.com-01004-600x400.jpg
A dog died and the owner took it to Pastor Chris Okotie. He asked Pastor Chris if he could organize a funeral service for the dead animal.

Pastor Chris: Nope. Its fruitless to attempt to do funeral for an ordinary animal specie. We can't hold a service for your dog in our church but there is a Catholic Church down the street, maybe they will do it for you.

Dog's owner: But pastor will that church accept a donation of 1 million naira?

Pastor Chris Okotie: Why didn't you tell me the dog was a true believer? Bring it, let's start immediately.

https://techcabal.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/linda-ikeji1.jpg
When Google removed her blog which she has laboured on for many years, she was heart broken. She went to the beach to at least help herself forget her sorrows and while at the beach, a friend called her that her blog was back. She started jumping and dancing. Chai Eeeyaaa! I am happy for her oo.

See picture @ www.lindaikeji..com/2014/11/jumping-in-bikini-at-lagos-bar-beach

You people no go fit spoil my comedy carrier. God no go gree for una. I promise that una go confess for the next post.

Jokes apart, when it comes to shake ukwu dance, these 5 music queens are the craziest. They can make you break your waist
1. SARAH KAISI
2. YEMI EBERECHI ALADE
3. BARBARA KANAM
4. ANITA MACUACUA
5. NALEDI KAISARA

Watch them take you on a high jump in some of their hotest music videos @ http://www.naijokpot..com/2014/11/top-5-craziest-african-queens-that-can_69.html

hunter21:
where are the freaking mods when you need them

Envy @ its peak. More than 1200 views. Thanks all for your comments though critical. That is a good start in Nairaland. God bless Seun for this forum. Once again thanks all. Don't miss the next post.

udemzyudex:
Hungry blogger.....

levelszik:
Weyrey blogger

Rich bloggers

diluminati:
dont try so hard, you are not funny.

I know why it is not funny to you. If one makes a joke about your father, it wont be funny. But remember, GEJ dont even know you. He no send you. Keep on crying.

Kasyn:
you only talk about important and superior people when you have something reasonable to say,but if you think otherwise then,goodluck!

Thanks for the advice. I will do better next time.

Kasyn:
who is the little kid here?
"political jokes is not always funny,maybe the person involved might take you serious......i will advice you to stay away from this"

This is democracy bros. Many newspapers, draw worse catoons and caricatures of the president and politicians. The politicians do see them and they laugh. The fact is that when no body is talking about someone, that person in not important.

Kasyn:
see ya life........100clicks? Lol......don't you even get it? Your joke isn't funny!

I said more than 100. Go back to school. Little kid.

Kasyn:
and remember,no is gonna click your f.ucking link,be it pro-pdp or pro-Apc members!

Sorry. I got more than 100 clicks within 1min after this post. Probably, you have secretely checked the site too. Hypocrites.