₦airaland Forum

sweerychick:
words of a lazy fella. That's the problem with Naija folks always thinking that it's the sole responsibility of a man to provide. Let me tell you something, in this harsh economic environment it requires two to make it, I don't leave the whole responsibility for my husband alone, I work too, provide for my own basic needs, if my husband wishes to give me fine by me, but I'm there to support him because if I don't work hard too, anything can happen, what if my husband falls sick tomorrow or worse case dies would I still wait for him to provide from the grave. Enough of these nonsense it's a man's duty to provide that's the words of Lazy women.

At Op focus on your kids and rent and bills, start a side hustle stop giving her money let her make her own, if she decides to cheat outside let her suffer the consequences. Man up and don't listen to any fool saying that as a man you must provide everything.

Wotowotoman:
Ogbeni, the sooner you accept say na peace of mind and a loyal partner be all you need from a marriage, the better for you if you want to live long.

What many of these broke men no dey think when they ask their wives to go out and hustle is that financial Independence for the woman dey bring its own set of problems.

Once the woman goes out and starts making her own money plus caring for the kids wey she born, ogbeni your blood pressure will never be the same again. The woman go realize say that broke man at home is useless and deserves no respect. Trust me when this happens, you may as well pack your bag comot from that house cos even your children go follow their mama to dey insult you as a broke lazy man.

JoeEeL:
You may one day lose that job. Or lose ur health in it.

Then u will come back to read your foolish post

BodyCount:
What other values do you want from someone who gave you two children in three years? Is it not too early?
Don't be a wicked man...

EDGEof2MORO:
These generation of weak mean are going to be the death of society. This is the first time I am seeing a man complain about providing for his family.

Kobojunkie:
"For better for worse" does not give the man power to throw out the terms of the contract signed with the woman. So, your argument does not hold at all. 🥱

2. If a man is no longer meet up with his side of the obligation,[b] the woman is legit expected to consider the marriage contract no longer valid. [/b]Men have argued this for the longest, too.🥱

CanadaOrBust:
I'm not changing anything. We went into it for better or worse, knowing that things could change. So if husband became sick and could no longer work she should stay at home and starve to death??

Kobojunkie:
You want to be able to change the terms of the contract without changing the contract itself? That is what we call fraud. 🥱🥱🥱

If you want a working woman, then marry only a working woman. No go marry jobless woman wey want do housewife come dey complain say she be problem after your ego has revealed your stewpidity to you. 🥱

Wotowotoman:
No. If Tilumbu economy hit, the man suppose double him hustle. If he needs the woman to help, na beg he go dey beg am. No be to call her lazy.

If you want to marry a helper wey go share bills with you, find a woman wey get job or business or craft and marry her with the agreement say una go dey share bills. No go marry one poor jobless woman with no education and skills and tomorrow you go call her lazy woman when you dey struggle to provide. Like say na she beg you to come marry am from her papa house

Adaumunocha:
Married for 3 years with two kids so its possible that the 2 child still a toddler! You men can be very wicked and selfish plus unreasonable. Did u bring househelp that will bring d kids back from school? U go out in d morning and come back at night and think d woman has it easy with toddlers? Stay away from women if cannot man d fvck Up!!!

Adaumunocha:
You minding the selfish man?

funkmrflexx:
I've been married for 3 years now with 2 kids, I try my best to take care of my family but the economy has become very bad so it's no longer possible to take care of a family of 4 on just 1 income.
When I had money, I setup a business for my wife because I want her to be engaged and also she can support with whatever she has from the business, but after a year the business crumbled with no results to show (she gave many excuses on why she can't continue the business), even after that I've tried engaging her on other endeavors but she's not always serious.

Now she does nothing, she just presses phone and play games all day long, all the responsibilities are on me, basically everything from school fees, feeding, house rent to buying a cube of Maggi.

I've tried talking to her several times but she will pretend to be serious and goes back to default settings, I'm tired and its really talking a tole on me, sometimes I just get angry at her for no reason and I don't even want to come home.

It's not the fact the she's staying home that's the issue, its the fact the she's not showing any effort to try and do something. I'm tired because all the money I make is being used for feeding and running the house, I can't even save or even think about buying properties

correctguy101:
Beautiful.

Now, what's rdt is what she plans to do with the 1m.

It's easier to do now. Try OPAY target saving. Even in 3 months, you can save over a million. And use it to boost ya other investment plans.

All things are achievable, just discipline yasef and you'll get many things done.

Snipingme:
Walk to a bank and invest in Money Market.StanbicIBTC, GTbank,Fidelity.UBA etc.it will grow and u will pay ur rent and still remain a millionaire

Moveittothem:
She hit it late.

1m now is like 100k of 2015

10m is the new 1m

Phranx1:
Congrats to her but her 250k 3 yrs back is much more valuable than her 1 million of today, APC hudini bulabu.

owobokiri:
Are you in business?
What kind of business can you start with that?

Let's discuss...

Shnew:
You don’t have to beg before someone helps you.

Btruth:
True. But true friend don't desert you no matter what the condition is. It's good if you are in a position to help when people come around and ask you for help. One shouldn't see it like those in needs are a burden. Life is not balance. I've also been in a position that requires me to seek for help from others. It pains me when people ask and I wasn't able to give out. But God genuinely knows my heart.

God love a cheerful giver.

It is well.

Stephen0mozzy:
Na lie. They'll only mock you if you become a chronic beggar; always relying on others for your sustenance but never taking the initiative to become independent.

The truth is, we all ask for help. Just don't ask for personal favours from people you don't have a deep relationship with - it puts unnecessary strain on the friendship especially if you don't have any value to give in return or kind.

Shnew:
Person way go help you no go stress you

ThugOfWar:
If you do not extend a helping hand when you can that's entirely your decision. Society revolve around helping each other grow. There is absolutely nothing wrong seeking a helping hand to pass through a difficult phase

Its part of living

Lekan239:
Same issue as mine. I gave her 2 million to start a foodstuff business in the market. For the first two months, I didn’t just provide money, I was involved. I helped her advertise, and whenever I wasn’t busy, I used my car to deliver goods to customers myself.
After two months, I stepped back and left the business fully in her hands.
Four months later, I added another 500,000 to support the business.
Nine months after she started, her shop was robbed and goods worth about 500,000 were stolen. Five days after the theft, I gave her another 500,000 to restock and recover.
One year later, when the shop rent expired, she asked me to pay for it. Despite the fact that I had already funded the business multiple times, I still paid the rent.
In January 2025, I gave her another 1 million to add to the business.
Then in April 2025, I visited her shop and noticed the goods were not encouraging. I asked her to calculate the total value of the goods remaining in the shop. After counting, she said everything in the shop was worth 900,000.
That was shocking to me, considering all the money that had gone into the business.
What hurt me even more is that she sometimes says I don’t give her money to run her business. She says if people who know me come to her shop, what would they see? As if I never supported her.
When she said that, I reminded her that I gave her 1 million in January 2025 alone. She completely denied it. She swore seriously that I never gave her that money. Even when I showed her the transfer receipt, she was still looking for excuses to deny it .
We have two children together. She is 35 years old, I am 31.
She is still in my house, but honestly, I have been thinking of how to move on.
In January 2026, she stopped going to the market completely without any clear explanation. I asked her many times why she stopped, but she kept saying “nothing.” From what I can see, it looks like the business has completely run down.. I though they said older women are better and will give you a man more peace financial. If so, then I wasn't lucky. I have also advised her several times to upgrade the tailoring she learned.
I even found someone for her to learn under, a family member, so it would be easier for her and less stressful. My idea was that she could go there casually, improve her skills, and not feel pressured.
But she refused. Anytime I bring it up, she says I want to disgrace her. She says if she goes to learn tailoring again, other workers will be looking at her. Meanwhile, my thinking was simple: if she has a solid skill, even 1 million would be enough to set up a decent tailoring shop for her, instead of constantly pumping money into a business. I'm just 31, I struggle before I make any penny, I'm into fashion business and thanks to God I am managing properly to feed the family. But right now, I feel confused, frustrated and honest tired.

Babawee:
I show my heart felt pity for the man involved... if he could hustle hard to save such amount and was squandered, its hurt..

Before setting business up for a lady, ensure u supervise her, she has record of all sales she makes in her everyday activities...

also dont put load on her like paying some bills, not all business will fetch money at the beginning.

But if u can handle that and she later squandered the money or sell out on credit to undeserved clients... she has herself to be blamed

merry101:
If you establish a business for your wife and subsequently cease paying utility bills, assuming she should cover them from the venture, it indicates that you do not have the business's best interests at heart. A virtuous woman would naturally contribute if she is capable.

Zinsu06:
This is what am battling with currently but this is my girlfriend I save up to 8 million with her last year at the end of the year when I wanted to collect the money 700k can be accounted for and mind u I gave her over 300k last year and her birthday is this month she is still asking me if there is no a special treatment every year I do gave her family money during fasting she as been asking me about the fasting money since as if nothing even concern her

owobokiri:
Days of starting a business with such amount are over.. 700k starts nothing.
What kind of business are you going to start with such paltry sum?
Instead of making people look dubious by giving them incosequential sums, do give anything at all

thomas2024:
I can never give my money to someone to start a business. I can only give the person money to support his or her business. I wonder why people dey marry person wey no get work keep for house. You no get business you are doing, or employed in any parastatal and you want me to marry you because of marriage? Many men are phoolish for real. You come dey give person wey no sabi value of money to start business😂

TossTos:
Thank God say the one I gave money then , na small she spend inside before I asked her I just collected the remaining. If I must give a woman money to start a business, she must earn it and how will she earn it , it is by her zeal , how industrious she is , is she doing anything I can Invest on ? .. if she's not doing anything before we met , she must earn it by what comes out of her mouth most times, her kind of person , her will power .. you see , our elderly people dey say , na pikin wey lift hands up make them carry am , na im we dey Carry o .. if I eventually give her ,i must monitor her and still support her not because of her but because of my children.. after I collected the remaining money from this one , I still went as far to start buying her equipment for beauty salon , I bought them only to still have them full of dust now in one of my room wey i pack them put.. the person wey I buy them for , don dey her papa house .. You see , most of this ladies , has got nothing upstairs rather than TikTok status , Whatsap just crushing on their butt , their faces , hairs , shaking yansh and all of that rather than doing something tangible with their lives .. what didn't i told her to do , stylishly she ignored them and I remained silent over it and I stopped buying more equipment.. she only care of the make-up kit and that's because to paint her face for parties or dance in front of TikTok status, roll heads , admiring her face .. I tire... Them plenty o .. even if you gave them 50m , them go still squander am ... Make una sha look before bringing any lady in .. Because marriage no be small thing o .. we must help ourselves, our goals is to support , form a team and archive more of what one person can't but as we come together to be one , we should archive it .. but no.

Toymax88:
Similar thing happened to me and I have not fully recovered.

Mine was over a million naira

My wife would run back to her family house after she's squandered the business capital. She lacks business acumen.

She's presently in IBADAN with the children, I was really mad at her last time she repeated same.

I'm planning to reconcile with her because of the children BUT she must be ready to get START UP CAPITAL for herself. This didn't go down well with her, she wants me to secure a loan from a cooperative society for her again.


Nothing dey the head

pocohantas:
My aunty is married to one. Sadly she isn't on NL. All she does is disturb me for money. There are many women married to such men.

MiamiePizza:
Make I help you because of God. No try this rubbish again o.

Get doxycycline, trimodazole (septrim 960mg) and erytromicine. Take one tablet each morning and evening. After the first day you won't feel anything again. Cures gonorrhea too.

Come back and quote me if it works for you and I'll comment here the herbal mix you can use for almost all infections. With 2k you can buy the things needed for it by yourself