₦airaland Forum

Can we please stop this "NATURAL/NORMAL" delivery language,,,,it's archaic please.

Medically, it's either VAGINAL delivery or Ceasearan Section delivery.

OP,as time goes by,her doc will advise what best to be done.
If you are not too comfortable with your present doc, please it's not too late to register in another hospital with good reference.

All the best!

Please, direct source supplier for FRIED WHITE PONMO is required.

I will prefer a Lagos location so I can go there myself but otherwise is fine also.

NB- NOT ponmo Ijebu
NOT sun dried white Ponmo

FRIED WHITE PONMO.

Thanks in advance.

bukatyne:
@pinkydaisy,

I am glad I waited till the end before commenting.

Your last post is extremely refreshing and I admire your ability to make decisions of what is important to you whether politically correct or not.

If you are the corporate organization type, you can explore moving to a more central location so that is another opportunity comes in future, you can pick it up.

Whatever your husband does, he needs to double his hustle so he is not thinking of sacrificing a warm home for money.

May all your efforts on your kids and family not be in vain, amen.

Amen. God bless you.

I have decided not to take the 350k job.

Though very few people said I should not and the majority said I should take it and adjust the caregiving for the kids, thanks to everybody.

My kids are still very young and I have been given a second chance to care for them myself. I have left them before to different types of care givers, the good, the bad and the ugly, even relatives have been invited to come live with us just to help out with the care of the kids but I regret many parts of that, many times I wish something's that happened didn't but I felt I couldn't help it because I had to work to provide a better life for them. I know the money will make a lot of difference, yes but what about this very important foundational stage of the children's lives? Note the word "Foundational".

Story time.......

For me to stick to my final decision, I had to cast my mind back to my own growing up.
I had a relatively good life, though my parents were not rich but there was food to eat, good schools, fancy clothes, color tv and video player,,,all the small things that make children feel happy but my parents were hardly at home. I saw my mum sometimes only at night and by then she is exhausted and just wants to get her rest, we had a maid for a while and I know my mum loved us very much but she was absent for the better part of my childhood and teenage years. The help could only do as much and many times, I went to school without cleaning my teeth or having a proper bath sef,,,who will ask? I always envied other children that their parents came to school to see the teacher for 1 thing or the other or simply to pick them from school.
I used to look into some people's see through curtains at night and envy the family being together,, maybe having a meal or just being at home together, I never had a family meal my entire childhood.
I never learnt how to relate properly with people or how to express your feelings correctly and adequately.
My intention here is not to bash my mum, God forbid! That woman was the financial pillar that we all relied on while growing up. She worked herself to the bones. We had no bond whatsoever and we are presently just trying to create one now in old age.
I remember the stress made her easily angry and she would lash out easily while we were just being silly kids.

Before I lost my last job, all this was also present in my life when I started my own family too, though I always said I would be more available than my mum did but how? In Lagos? With traffic, stress and whatnot. My patience was so short and most weekends am so tired to even actively engaged with the kids in any form but I was providing all they needed.
Honestly, many nights, I cried when I recall how my kids growing up was mirroring my own growing up and I prayed to God to help me be better. I then lost the job.
This past year, I have had the privilege to experience life in a very different way, money is tight, yes, but God gave my something to do while I can still be there for the kids full time, am guessing he gave me a second chance to be better.

I truly was confused when I got the offer and was disturbed in my spirit hence I reached out for public opinion.

I wish I could hand over that job to someone else, but I can't, sorry guys.

It might look like a stupid and foolish decision but I had to do a hard rethink and refresh my memory to remind myself that at some certain times in life, some things are more important than money.
I will make money plenty in this life maybe not right away due to my present decision but for now, I will manage and I feel liberated.

I understand if you don't get it.

Thank you very much everybody, I appreciate.

Dollywood:
Connect me to that 350k job, that 70k is okay for you. You will have to spend more time with your family.

It is well.

Abilistic:
Very daisy......

Follow your heart but use your brain!

I will.
Thank you.

Everyone, thank you so much for your honest replies. God bless you all.

Believe it or not, after reading through all these posts, a strange kind of peace came over me.

I called my hubby and we discussed at length and even started planing ahead.

I will surely come back here to encourage someone else too sometime soon.

Most times, I believe God speaks through people.

May the will of God be done.

Thanks everyone, I appreciate.

Once again, God bless.

ITbomb:
As I see it

The major investment to reap later is your children, so to get the 70k job will position them better in life to acquire all that you denied yourself

However, psychological issues due to inadequate resources might arise (tension and anxiety in the family)

How much can you make during the 14 days off, to compliment your 70k?
How much is your husband bringing to the table?

On the other end
It takes 5 months of 70k to make 350k.
Taking out transportation and other logistics, you might still have 250k left, and that will provide for your family

My verdict
Buhari is not going anywhere till 2023, so get the 350k job and clear some family bills while saving as much as you can.
You can afford better school with better environment for your children and use Sundays to appraise them since you have already bonded well, they will be more prone to carry on your instructions when you are not around.
You can use phone, video calls to be checking on them.
I assume, a company paying 350k should have free WiFi so you only subscribe for house mifi

Great. Thanks a million,God bless you.

Heroulo:
Also the part of transport, there is a Jetty at ikorodu, you can also consider this to reduce travel time

Ok, thanks a lot.

Barbiturate:
From your write-up, you already know the option your heart wants, but I guess you just want to seal it more with people's opinion.

My Advice: If you have the power for the stress and you want to be "submissive" to your husband, and you want to uplift your family financially, then take up the 350k job.

Forget about not seeing your kids till Sunday. Seeing your kids on Sunday and playing with them and all, will make up for the other days. Some don't even get to see their kids in weeks and months. The good thing is; you're not breastfeeding.

Thank you, I appreciate.

Klass99:
Dear Daisy,

Even the good book says money answereth all things.

You still have school fees to pay, as those children grow older, and things are not getting cheaper or better in our country.

While I understand and appreciate your desire plus efforts so far, to bond with your kids and raise them well, you and hubby need to decide what's best for your family.

Pls may I ask what part of Lekki? Have you been to the company, do they look like a healthy organization that can pay salaries?

Lekki 1 in particular is notorious for companies that look good on the website but have trouble paying salaries as and when due. This has happened to a dear friend, so pls do your due diligence.

Have you even prayed about this discussed it with your hubby? What was his take on it?

Thanks a lot.

The company is a good one, I got referral from a dear friend.
I have prayed, I don't know why I still have fear of leaving my kids, maybe because I have experienced it before.
I have discussed with hubby, he wants us to take the job.

Bornsinner7:
Well.. since you pointed out that you're the bread winner of your family I would suggest you go for the 350k job..

But the question is can you cope with the job?? I don't live in Lagos so I basically have no idea of the distance of the job from your residence.. but from your detailing it seem to be stressful and far...

If you're able to cope with it.. then you should opt in for the job.. cuz right now the family needs that money more..

Your husband is there to manage the kids or like you suggested you can look for a caregiver who will take care of the kids..

I can never understand how hard it is for you now especially as a mother but the kids need the finance too as much as they need the motherly care

Thank you very much.

JidennaJason:
Dear pinkydaisy,


I understand your fears of leaving your kids in the hands of a housekeeper, BUT I will advise you take the 350k offer...


You can work there for 3yrs and save some good amount to start up a business that would make you spend some quality time with your family.

Do this in support of your husband to lessen the financial burden on him.

Thanks for your input.

Dollywood:
Some questions people ask on nairaland sometimes just baffles me.

Thanks for your input but remember - Not everybody is like you. Sometimes, people are confused about so called little things.

RealLordZeus:
If your side hustles can get you between 100-150k monthly. Stick with the 70k job.

At the end of the day, it is all about family

Thank you.
My side hustle is really small.

MufasaLion:
Get the 350k job. It will make your savings increase and also relieve your husband's. You prefer the 70k job because it gives you enough time to spend with family and also it's 12days per month. What if you lose that 70k job?.

350k job is worth it a million times. You can do it and decide to resign after a year or 2 if you feel you can start up a business along the line.

Thank you for you input.

Please how can one start a small dried catfish delivery business in Lagos?

Please, any new info on different bank's international spending limit for naira MasterCard as at this January 2021?

God bless you for all the effort, you are really God sent.
Pls I want to reduce the highness and serious noise of the gen, honestly am not too sure of the screw,,,so that I won't be doing the wrong thing. I saw the pic on page 1-5 but my brother, I couldn't place where it is.
The gen is small tiger.
Thanks again.

Hello,

I can not believe this thread is still active,,,what a surprise.
Agiboma started this sometime in 12/13, can't really remember but it was such a wonderful group back then and still is till now as I can deduce from the numerous contributions.
Just said to check and there it was,,,,,good job mamas,,,God bless.

Am joining the thread again and I am currently 10wks+,,,
this morning sickness is killing me like its my first time,,,,,cant ever seem to get used to it. The nausea is out of this world and everything and everyone has a foul odour,,,my kitchen is a no go area kpakpa,,,,,God help us oh.

For all the preggies out there,,,nice to meet you guys again.

gbl01:
Our great great great grand parents were not lazy, they clean, sweep the community, go to farm, work all day, creat time to go to the market and sell their farm produce, give brith to plenty children, wean them properly and even when they die, they still work as Ancestors, drinking blood of chickens, answering prayers and watching over the community.

What da Heck! This wife has no reason to complain. The husband is working his arse up, he's getting heavily tired though when he get home. The wife- a full time house wife complaining of doing her own work. I guess she wants to sleep all day while the husband come back and do household chores and probably cook for her. Pressing his phone is his relaxing mode.lolz


I think this is laziness redefined( my point of view). If wife can't cope with household chores, get househelp. Don't bother the man with your own work, he has his. If he choose to help, fine. Otherwise face your work o! Except if the wife is a full time housewife and the husband is a full time house husband.


This has no connection with love. It will even frustrate the husband and kill the love. You both need to sit and discuss this and ask him for his own opinion and reasons

fROM YOUR COMMENT,,YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY NOT MARRIED AND HAVE NO IDEA HOW THIS WORKS IN THE REAL WORLD,,,,,,

100Cents:
Stop kissing the child.

So she knows its totally bad for strangers to do so too..

I actually started saying NO Kiss kiss and cross my lips with my finger whenever she puckers her lips and starts doing muaaahhhhh,,,,,, and madam will not stop the muaaahhhhh until it has landed somewhere on your face,,LOL,,so sweet.....

Now some bad belles want to take away this sweetness shared between me and my baby cos am desperate to let her know that kissing anyone asides me and dad is a NO NO,,,,,,,

Please, more suggestions as to how we can deal with this issue and like i said especially when it comes to people you wouldn't normally be so direct with out of respect,,,,,like your in-laws or close friends....if its a neighbor or random stranger, that one no hard at all.

Picture this,,,,one smokey robinson brother-inlaw finishes his stick of cigarette just before stepping into your house and your daughter is going direct for muaahhhhhh,,,,,,ayama!

kreamidiva:
My husband told my daughter to slap anyone who kisses her on the lips. Lol...

One guy came to my house, gave my daughter a bear hug and kisses her on the cheek.

I was not comfy with that. He would want to hold her, carry her on his laps and all that. So the next time he came to give that peck abi na kiss, I promptly told him that we don't kiss o. He said noo that it's a harmless kiss but I insisted and reminded my daughter what her daddy told her and that was it!

He doesn't even give her hugs anymore.

I can imagine how you must have felt seeing him doing all the carry carry and touchy touchy,,,,some people sef,,,,,,,,infact the -KISS and SLAP- technique will be the way to go once my DD can grasp what that mean,,,,,,

Ewuro4:
Mrs OP, do you invite strangers in your home?

How do you mean strangers? This Particular person was DH's friend and colleague,,,,,,,

Chiefpriest & EfemenAXY, please no derailing as this is a very sensitive topic especially when it pertains to those you would normally respect,,,,,,,if left alone, i fit slap person for that kain rubbish but thank God hubby was around that day oh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,dnt know how else to let people know its wrong to do that.

whats the price,,,remenber its christmas season oh,,so sofri with the price,,,and where is your location?

This was quite funny,,,sorry for your dilemma,,

Try getting unmixed palm kernel oil - not palm oil - the dark colored strong smelling oil gotten from the inner kernel. Its really strong smelling but very good for replenishing damaged skin, asides from the very strong odour, you should be able to notice changes in about 2-3 months of consistent use. Best of luck!

I am so angry,,,,anyway,,,,hope parents are learning sha,,better to be in the bad books of some prospective child kisser by stoping them from the kissing action than to be fuming and raging about the done deed,,,,

Hello all, couldn't sleep,,something has been on my mind.

What is your take about other people other than yourself or spouse giving your child a kiss,,,whether on the lips or cheeks,,and when i say child i mean your 3 year old and below,,,,

I don't know if am being overly paranoid but by God i hate it so much and can not fathom why people do such,,,,,,,,i am so planning to start telling people outright - NO KISSING - i don't know if that is wrong though.

Hubby's friend came earlier and my cutie out-rightly refused to go to him and say hello,,,fine by me,,,,,,,when she finally agreed, the "Goat (forgive me please am so annoyed) decided to plant a peck on her lips,,i was so mad and hubby knew so he just carried my child from the idiot. Yes i said idiot cos i think in this age and time, he should know better.

Please,i personally need advise on what to do cos my person doesn't agree with this at all,,,,,,,by the way,,,myself and hubby gives kisses and hugs alot to my little one and i don't want her thinking it's alright for any kangaroo to do so,,

So,,,should we stop with the kissing and simply say NO when she tries to kiss us?
How do i tell people politely not to do so again if they do it before i can stop the act?
This thing is really making me angry and i need advise please.

The anus is not a se_x*ual organ,,,,and those actress who act like it's fun for a man to put his KINI into their thingy are pretending for the camera,,,,,,,,,maybe men get a special feeling when their anus is manipulated because of the position of the prostate gland but ultimately i don't think the anus was created as a s*ex*ual organ especially in women.
Like someone earlier said,,,imagine trying to poo a very hard stool,,,,,it's painful.
Please tell her to explain to her husband and show him evidence online - try GOOGLE- of what a*na*l s*e*x has caused women later in life,,,it's not funny at all, whether lubricated or not.

There is nothing wrong with mouthaction with your husband.

Hi, ,,,,please, do you still have the red rice available? and how much does the 25kg of brown rice go for? what about delivery? do you do delivery within the lagos axis?

Kanwulia: NL just recovered from A CRASH from YOUR GOD!
I did not even have to pray for one!
Touch not!
Or CRASSSSSSH again!!!!

Babe, wats happening nahhh,,calm down abeg.