₦airaland Forum

Why not start by telling us how you intend to spend yours.

Why una wan kill Lotuken because of a good intentioned suggestion?
@Lotuken I dey with you all the way! Time don reach make we start to dey yearn "queen's" oyinbo for this forum!

On a serius note. U gat to say it the way u feel it. Bothering about grammar is unnecessary headache. This site with post all in "good" english will make it look like a boring online version of "Edet lives in Calabar"!

Thank you all for sharing your opinion. And thank you TBD10463, mummax2, alheri for sharing your experience quite insightful. Those experiences are real eye opener.

@TBD10463, Maybe somebody with parenting experience can offer some advice. I have no experience. Thanks once again for sharing your experience.

Primary: St Pauls (UNA) Primary School, Somolu, Lagos
Secondary: Igbobi College Yaba
Tertiary: OAU, Ile-Ife, Nigeria

Welcome to Nairaland Pessy. Fine boy, no pimples. I guess tellbabe can add you to that list.

I look at OBJ between 1999 and now and i don't think he's that bad as some people had painted him.
We have to be frank and be truthful about the whole thing.

Akolawole seems to be doing a better job than Femi Fani-Kayode. I hereby nominate him for the post of presidential spokesman come June 2007.

True OBJ has achieved. Is that why he needs a third term? Has he achieved more than what Mandela did(putting down a viable economic, social and political structure) in a single term? OBJ simply did his job in the last seven years. He should not rubbish everything he has done by manipulating the polity and staying beyond 2007.

moyosoret, i couldnt read your essay because it was too long. But I couldnt help seeing the part where you said OBJ is trying to be carefull who he hands over to. What is his business who he hands over to? Is it now for him to choose who to hand over to? My BRO this is a democracy. Nigerians should determine who rules them, not him. The voters determine, that is democracy the way it should be. If we vote Alams again, let it be that is the peoples choice, that is democracy to me.
OBJ is not our(Nigerians) father and cannot determine who we marry(Vote for) as you put. We are old enough to fall in love of our own freewill and marry whom we choose(whether ugly,poor or evil).

Well said alheri!

@Seun: Is it possible to turn this to a poll? For and against OBJ's alleged third term?
For me, I think it is morally wrong and will make nonsense of whatever perceived good OBJ has done for Nigeria. He'll simply join the infamous hall of African "Sit Tight" rulers!

Akolawole:
@Alheri

I am in no way related to OBJ, IN FACT, i visited Ogun state for the first time last april for a birthday party.

I guess that was during OBJ's birthday party

If OBJ stays, I think it will be everybody's fault:

OBJ: For not resisting the temptation
Advisers: For advising him to go for it
Lawmakers: if they modify the constitution
Akolawole: If he collects money and organises YEAO (Youth Earnestly Ask for OBJ )
International Community: If OBJ is not warned of being ostracised and then ostracised. I guess their hands will be tied though, if the constitution is amended.
Every Nigerian: If we adopt 'sidon look' stance.

I think Chxta and Ijebuman said it all.

Olorididan:
U CAN'T!! See U ONLY BEGIN TO KNOW A WOMAN when she has had the THIRD CHILD for U! So just be real good to her, FIRE HER WITH ALL YOUR MIGHT , and then PRAY TO GOD She likes U......

Are you speaking from experience?

I believe you. In that case, yatssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ono:
And we got married, Ist October 2005.

I want to encourage every young man out there to tow the line. It's the best. What with this AIDS ravaged world of ours? why would you want to learn and get any sexual experience before getting married? It takes only 30 -40 minutes to learn all there is. I'm talking from experience.

You (and your wife I presume) learned all there is to learn in 40 minutes? You must be a genius!

pete:
did anyone lived in faj?....remember on shot guy who repairs shoes.called agba akin...use to do yats..yats.heheh like when he sees a girl, he goes.."yats..yator lani ooh ooma!".

I'm sure you didn't do aro.

"deflowered"? "used"? I think worldly wise, exposed,...., more appropriate.

Congratulations TunjiCrown.
@IAH Block one are the craziest cause it's inhabited by "jambites" who are new to "aro" and generally tend to go to the extreme. I guess u had a taste right?

Hey Pete! You stayed in block 3. You guys used to do "ejade kawa burawa" (come out, lets start yabbing competition) with block 2. Great awoite! I'm sure you're one of those with caustic mouth that those moza girls used to dread! "Won tunti de o" (They've come again)

I think you're about to lose your son unless you act fast. You need to have a heart to heart talk with her about what is going on. If she is not forth coming, talk to her mother or anybody in her family who you think will tell you the truth about what is going on. I think so many things can be resolved through communications. However, before you do any talking, I think you need to identify what you want and what your expectations are concerning the kid and the mother. Use that as the basis of your talk and please try and be sincere. I think sincerity breeds sincerity. I wish you best of luck.

I was in Ife for 5 sessions. Spent 4 sessions in Awo hall. I left in 2001. I remember when cult guys came to skool in 1999. We ran out of our rooms flip over the fence at the back of the hall at the height of the shootings. When the shooting died down, I was trying to climb the fence back into the hall and I couldn't get a grip. Someone (one of the people on my side of the fence) just ask rhetorically, "se person help u jump the fence come this side?" Everybody just busted into laughter . I had to climb a tree before I could get over the fence .

Ife was quite an experience. Awo was a crazy experience . I remember one night, I woke by 12am to go and read in class. I was just passing the Awo coffee room when a passerby just called out familiarly "Igi Iwe, Eso odo" (meaning that I read with nothing to show for it ). This is a guy I've never met and I just wasn't what he was calling me . I just wanted to chase the guy and punch him because I was lost for words but he wouldn't just wait to get even the mildest reply. At the end of the day, I abadoned the class and went to the coffee room to go and find who to pick on . Greaaaaaaaaaaaat Ifeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for your response everybody. @De-King jealousy was one of the issues in my case. The son always came first before me in everything. Funny enough, I became jealous and resentful. Another issue that was raised was be financially responsible for the upkeep of a son that wasn't bearing my name. I didn't find that comforting either. In dating alone, I find being asked to pay for his skool fees. Maybe I wouldn't have run so fast if the finances didn't come up. I was asked to love the boy like mine. is this sincerely possible?

One for Virgin Gina and one for Virgin ZM.

Z4M, Gina! You tou are virgins? I'm outa here!

@Z4M4eva I don't think I'll marry a virgin cause I'll test drive   (if she was one) before wedding. Let's say It's because I'm scared of getting married to a frigid being.

@gina34 I don't think I'll be unlucky enough to get a virgin for a wife. When I see virgins, I run.

Anyway, I think all talk about "I'm a virgin" is all bullshit. I think it makes more sense to find your sexual rythm before marriage than to keep guessing till the wedding night. I hate surprises. Just my personal opinions.

I was in a dating a great lady sometime this year. I thought I was in love. I was all mushy, mushy. One day she told me she had a son. The relationship was in its early stages. I initially thought I'll be able to handle it. As time went on, it became obvious that I couldn't handle it. The fact that she's "after one" was a big deal to me. I had to walk away from the relationship. Maybe I just wasn't in love or that there is just nothing like unconditional love.

Marry a virgin? I don't think so.

I'm glad to hear that I didn't upset you at all. Like you said, only you will live with whatever you end up doing or failed to do. I wish you well in whatever you decide to do and pray that God help you to do what is right.

I've just come accross this thread now. If I understand your question, I think you want to develop an E-Voting system where votes will come in through GSm phones and your micro-controller device.

I think for the microcontroller device, you need to know the exact device you're programming and get the manufacturers documentation. A lot will depend on if the manufacturer equiped the equipment with a programable interface and the procedure for programing such an interface, the output fomats and all. Long and short, you need to know the exact device.

As for the WAP/SMS gateway, I don't think it will be worthwhile developing a gateway except if that is the main project. You can use Kannel that someone mentioned before. I've used it before and it works perfectly with serverside script engines including PHP.

If I'm the guy, and I hide my number from you, it means
1. I want to always be the one to contact you and not the other way.
2. I don't trust you not to try to force yourself into my life because you'll do if you know how to contact me.
3. I have no interest in you, the mother.
4. I want to keep a tab on the boy, I might think of bringing him into the family if he makes something of his life.
5. I don't want anything to threaten the life I have with my new family.

I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings but that's what will be on my mind if I call you asking all the questions, not telling anything bout myself and not being remorseful for what I made you go through.

Just like mckaycee said, a father that shied way from his responsibilities for more than five years is better dead in an auto crash. You can tell your son the auto crash story until he is old enough to handle the truth. From what you said in your story, it is obvious that this guy has no interest in you and I doubt too, if he has interest in your son, except for the sake of satisfying his curiosity.

He has violated your pride once and will do it over and over again if you give him the opportunity. You have no business talking to him about "our" son. He'll only come around to shake up your emotional balance and that of your son. Put him behind you and move on with your life. Just make sure you make something meaningful out of your life and that of your son so that the guy has no chance to sneer in the future.

However, seek for more advice as the above are just my opinion. I pray that God help you.

As an example, two of my colleagues saw me reading this thread and they started a joke . One of them asked cynically "Are you now interested in single mothers?" The other came with a rejoinder, "Maybe he is getting desperate" So, Chocolatte, the above is the concern about the kid. The above was said in a light mood but that's what you'll have to contend with.

I was looking for online car showrooms in Nigeria using Google and Voila. Here I am.

Maybe if the question had been if all the categories meet all my criteria (mutual feelings, character, beliefs and values), assuming it is possible, which one will I prefer? I'll just close my eyes and pick one .