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Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. - Family (6) - Nairaland

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Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Blackdeewhy(m): 6:52pm On May 05, 2021
I asked myself same question over and over again. I've come to realized that the option you CURRENTLY have has a Nigerian youth who have nobody is to:
1. Be a certified professional in your career. I'm talking PhD not masters please.
2. Be a kidnapper demand a bad ass ransom.
3. Be a robber. Armed one though and your target should be bank of course.
4. Trust God.
I am presently ruthing for number one and four as I can't do the other options.
So for each day I wake up, I tell myself I WILL MAKE IT, MY SALARY WILL BE PAID IN NINE TO TEN FIGURES. I DESERVE IT. I WILL EARN IT.
OP, I wish you ALL the very best. And YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE.

2 Likes

Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Nobody: 6:52pm On May 05, 2021
Na 2 seconds person go use blow, 2 Seconds Tennant don turn landlord. No stop to grind. Keep on grinding. You never know how close you are.

1 Like

Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by BlackTemplar001: 6:53pm On May 05, 2021
Ogbeni forget that thing joor, na person wey don die him chapter close, but so long as u still dey breath, my guy ur time go surely come, just focus n keep praying ���
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Femeazy(m): 6:53pm On May 05, 2021
Firstly, you have to appreciate God for keeping you alive. Some of your age mates are mo more.
Secondly, keep your head on. Never give up. Constantly call on God for help and grace, and whatever your hands find doing, do it diligently with all your might.
Shalom
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by AuroraB(f): 6:53pm On May 05, 2021
WhiteRuler:
First of all, apologies for any errors you may come across as I am not at the right frame of mind now.

Secondly, this post is 100% real about my life. So nothing is fake in it.

I'm a man, precisely 33 years old. I graduated from the University in 2019 at age 31. You may ask why I was still in school till that age. Well, I have realized that family/parental background matters a lot in a child's life no matter how people try to twist the fact. My family/parental background wasn't a good one educationally and financially as my parents were just petty traders and this has contributed negatively in achieving my goals and aspirations in life. With the above, you can deduce that there was no sources of funding for my tertiary education so I had to find a job after my secondary school while very ambitious about my furthering my education because I always believed in acquiring education up to university level. This led me to doing several odd jobs such as construction site labourer, security guard, cleaning, barbing, hawking, even to remove soak away and many others just to feed and see myself through school. Let me also add that @33 now, there are some jobs I can't do again because of some changes in my health system occasioned by some of the odd jobs I exposed myself to. For example, any strenuous job now is not for me as it makes me breath heavily like an asthmatic patient; any job that requires standing for long or bending down not for me due to broken waist (although these might be solvable issues but for now, I can't tell cos I have no money to visit health facility).

Moving on, while I may be thanking God for the academic success (even though the school is yet to issue me certificate) but I'm having strong feelings about myself. I feel like I have failed in life. I feel like I am a failure. My mates who got admission into university immediately after secondary school are gainfully employed today, living in comfortable apartment (built or rented), married with kids, have their own car and generally doing well. Even the ones who didn't further but venture into learning trade are doing well too. On the other hand, at 33, I have virtually nothing to show for it. Still living in one thatch house, poor, hungry and starving, no wife, no kid(s) (not even a serious girlfriend), no job, no car and nothing to show for my 33 years on earth. This is why I'm feeling like I have failed in life and it has made me to always be ashamed of myself and always trying to avoid meeting my mates who are doing well.

Also, looking at the country Nigeria, most employers recruit under 30. @33, what are my chances of
landing a good job if I refuse to forge age and go for service but collect exemption letter? What are even the possibility of getting a job as I have no capital for business? Note: between 2019 and now, I've learnt several online money making skills but yet to make a kobo out of it all. Note also: ordinarily, I wouldn't seek employment (private or government) because I'm multi talented e.g in football, entertainment or business but these talents need money to develop which is what I'm lacking.

My questions:
Please what do you all think? Do you think I have failed or I'm a failure in life? What is the future holding for me? As at today, the only thing I can boast of is "I am a graduate". Nothing more...like I said, poor, hungry and starving.

Help me with good pieces of advice please before my mind begins to consider evil as fastest way of making money. Thanks.
Why not add your qualification (s)? Your skill (s)? Your location... and willingness to relocate if need be? It could be of help.
Don't despair... you are still alive for a good reason. Believe so.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Ishilove: 6:54pm On May 05, 2021
Your case is strong
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by tbliss22(m): 6:54pm On May 05, 2021
WhiteRuler:
First of all, apologies for any errors you may come across as I am not at the right frame of mind now.

Secondly, this post is 100% real about my life. So nothing is fake in it.

I'm a man, precisely 33 years old. I graduated from the University in 2019 at age 31. You may ask why I was still in school till that age. Well, I have realized that family/parental background matters a lot in a child's life no matter how people try to twist the fact. My family/parental background wasn't a good one educationally and financially as my parents were just petty traders and this has contributed negatively in achieving my goals and aspirations in life. With the above, you can deduce that there was no sources of funding for my tertiary education so I had to find a job after my secondary school while very ambitious about my furthering my education because I always believed in acquiring education up to university level. This led me to doing several odd jobs such as construction site labourer, security guard, cleaning, barbing, hawking, even to remove soak away and many others just to feed and see myself through school. Let me also add that @33 now, there are some jobs I can't do again because of some changes in my health system occasioned by some of the odd jobs I exposed myself to. For example, any strenuous job now is not for me as it makes me breath heavily like an asthmatic patient; any job that requires standing for long or bending down not for me due to broken waist (although these might be solvable issues but for now, I can't tell cos I have no money to visit health facility).

Moving on, while I may be thanking God for the academic success (even though the school is yet to issue me certificate) but I'm having strong feelings about myself. I feel like I have failed in life. I feel like I am a failure. My mates who got admission into university immediately after secondary school are gainfully employed today, living in comfortable apartment (built or rented), married with kids, have their own car and generally doing well. Even the ones who didn't further but venture into learning trade are doing well too. On the other hand, at 33, I have virtually nothing to show for it. Still living in one thatch house, poor, hungry and starving, no wife, no kid(s) (not even a serious girlfriend), no job, no car and nothing to show for my 33 years on earth. This is why I'm feeling like I have failed in life and it has made me to always be ashamed of myself and always trying to avoid meeting my mates who are doing well.

Also, looking at the country Nigeria, most employers recruit under 30. @33, what are my chances of
landing a good job if I refuse to forge age and go for service but collect exemption letter? What are even the possibility of getting a job as I have no capital for business? Note: between 2019 and now, I've learnt several online money making skills but yet to make a kobo out of it all. Note also: ordinarily, I wouldn't seek employment (private or government) because I'm multi talented e.g in football, entertainment or business but these talents need money to develop which is what I'm lacking.

My questions:
Please what do you all think? Do you think I have failed or I'm a failure in life? What is the future holding for me? As at today, the only thing I can boast of is "I am a graduate". Nothing more...like I said, poor, hungry and starving.

Help me with good pieces of advice please before my mind begins to consider evil as 2 fastest way of making money. Thanks.

The only error in your thinking is comparing yourself to those that got admission before you or those that graduated before you.

Everyone is on his or her own pace.... And let me tell it to you, nobody is interested in your story.... All you need is to stand your ground and push it till you succeed.

They say the country is hot, not friendly, not business conducive, uncle don't dull yourself people (especially guys below 30's) are making it big.... Not everyone is into internet scam, look around and get things rolling

Tips:

Simply look around for a bankable skill and start from there.

Life's Formular: Work/Hustle as if God does not exist and at the same time PRAY to God as if you know nothing.

Finally, I wish you well and will be glad to hear your success story in few months/years from now.

Shalom!!
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Oshokalo: 6:54pm On May 05, 2021
aremuforlife:
You have not failed, except if you quit. There are lots of thing to achieve at 33, you are already a graduate, get your self busy, no matter how little it fetch you, get a serious relationship, to avoid depression. Make yourself happy.
You are not a failure.
do u say serious relationship, forget Nigeria girls no dey serious with who no get or wey him family no get
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Codes151(m): 6:57pm On May 05, 2021
Truth is, our generation has suffered.

Hang in there bro
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Oshokalo: 6:57pm On May 05, 2021
tunary:
Your own is better than some people out there. You are even a graduate.

God is the only solution to all problems but u suppose get handwork/skill instead of waiting for employment. Yes sir yes sir job
whether u get handwork u go still say yes sir to ur client abi na costumer
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by bigtt76(f): 6:58pm On May 05, 2021
Old age of those days nor bi like today own. How can 86 year de bang get baby cheesy



wwwtortoise:
cry

Abraham became a first time father at the age of 86.

Moses married for the first time at 40.

Joshua was 59 when he succeeded Moses.

Daniel was 70 when he survived King Darius’ lion’s den.

As long as you are alive, you are still eligible for success.

Draw closer to your maker in total submission and prayer.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Oppy2k2: 7:01pm On May 05, 2021
U are not a failure me man!

U are on d right track to achieve something big. Keep doing something no matter how little it is, soon u will remember this day and smile.



I wish you all the best
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by wwwtortoise(m): 7:01pm On May 05, 2021
bigtt76:
Old age of those days nor bi like today own. How can 86 year de bang get baby cheesy




Those days, these days but same God.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by joeymartinijnr: 7:02pm On May 05, 2021
What are you grateful for?
What are your aspirations for the next 12 months?

When you finally answers to the questions above, get a Journal (notebook) make projections for the next 6months - 1year break them down into monthly, weekly and daily to-do list. Commit to it.

At 33. Your best bet is to create an Enterprise
Learn "Sales"
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Greatlee54: 7:03pm On May 05, 2021
I left the university about the same age(2015) with a very similar background, I have done almost all the menial jobs you mentioned; I was frustrated and depressed after school with no job, a first class degree but I kept believing in myself.
U have to keep the hope alive and never compare yourself with ppl who had both age and connection as advantage. My pastor failed me nobody believed in me , I felt ashamed of myself but I never gave up! I hit the streets, damn the certificates n hoped on God. Bought my first car same year and started building a brand new house thereafter (top notch and almost completed), have never done a salary job after university education and I have the prettiest wife on earth.
Family failed me, Nigeria failed me, friends failed me, religion failed me but God and my beautiful wife stood by me!
Try new things, change your location, hope on God, believe in yourself, humble up n start little. God help you.

2 Likes

Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by LofP(m): 7:03pm On May 05, 2021
You are not a failure.

You just got your degree and you hustled your way up.

Kudos to you bro...

Don't think otherwise at this time, greatness lies in you!
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by osasyankee(m): 7:03pm On May 05, 2021
Start church business. Thank me later... I believe u are matured enough to wyne ur followers.. That's the only thing that will help you now... God help u, u will see a lady or church member that will belive your course...
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by SteelMcqueen: 7:04pm On May 05, 2021
@Whiteruler! What you think is what you are! As a man thinketh so is he. First thing you have to do is change your mindset to a winning mindset. Life begins at 40, you aren't even 40. Today is the beginning of the rest of your life.

It's never too late to start over. First go back to your source - God. Rededicate your life to him. He created you, so he has the map for your life. Seek is will for your life, through constant prayer.

Two, Draw out what you'll like to achieve in 5 years. Categorize them into: Family, Career, Spiritual, Health, Relationship.

What is in your hand @whiteruler? What skill do you have, do you have the relevant skills for today's market. If you don't. Draw a plan on how to acquire a useful skill. Give yourself 6months to learn. It will definitely benefit you in the future.

Tip: Wake up every morning and confess positive words to yourself.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by ecomalchemist(m): 7:05pm On May 05, 2021
neyohh:
Find a way to get out of Nigeria. Apply for a graduate course abroad, find someone to borrow you their statement of account as prove.

Japa.

It's not as easy as you make it seem brother, immigration policies are stringent worldwide.

Plus the grass ainw always green on the other side.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by LikeAking: 7:06pm On May 05, 2021
Emelcee:
Even Desmond Elliot can't stop you, bro

were una dey see all these money sef.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Magnito74: 7:07pm On May 05, 2021
Drop number
Preciousgirl:
Call me
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Kooldame: 7:07pm On May 05, 2021
You're already an achiever by pursuing your goal to become a graduate and now it is already actualized.That is your major achievement for now.Learning multiples skills is another achievement.Since you know how to barb why not do some menial jobs pending the time you will work with your certificate to rent a shop and start your barbing job.You mentioned that you don't have a serious girlfriend,once you prove yourself to any girl that you're man enough by being independent they would be serious with you.Above all be prayerful to God so that He can help you to be fulfilled in life.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by billyG(m): 7:10pm On May 05, 2021
U never fail unless U want to consult Gumi for advice.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by ecomalchemist(m): 7:10pm On May 05, 2021
Greatlee54:
I left the university about the same age(2015) with a very similar background, I have done almost all the menial jobs you mentioned; I was frustrated and depressed after school with no job, a first class degree but I kept believing in myself.
U have to keep the hope alive and never compare yourself with ppl who had both age and connection as advantage. My pastor failed me nobody believed in me , I felt ashamed of myself but I never gave up! I hit the streets, damn the certificates n hoped on God. Bought my first car same year and started building a brand new house thereafter (top notch and almost completed), have never done a salary job after university education and I have the prettiest wife on earth.
Family failed me, Nigeria failed me, friends failed me, religion failed me but God and my beautiful wife stood by me!
Try new things, change your location, hope on God, believe in yourself, humble up n start little. God help you.

Big ups, I'm inspired.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Nobody: 7:12pm On May 05, 2021
Only God can help you, its never too late with him. You are not a failure my dear, life just delayed you a little, but God can help you. Yes he does.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by optimusprime2(m): 7:13pm On May 05, 2021
WhiteRuler:
First of all, apologies for any errors you may come across as I am not at the right frame of mind now.

Secondly, this post is 100% real about my life. So nothing is fake in it.

I'm a man, precisely 33 years old. I graduated from the University in 2019 at age 31. You may ask why I was still in school till that age. Well, I have realized that family/parental background matters a lot in a child's life no matter how people try to twist the fact. My family/parental background wasn't a good one educationally and financially as my parents were just petty traders and this has contributed negatively in achieving my goals and aspirations in life. With the above, you can deduce that there was no sources of funding for my tertiary education so I had to find a job after my secondary school while very ambitious about my furthering my education because I always believed in acquiring education up to university level. This led me to doing several odd jobs such as construction site labourer, security guard, cleaning, barbing, hawking, even to remove soak away and many others just to feed and see myself through school. Let me also add that @33 now, there are some jobs I can't do again because of some changes in my health system occasioned by some of the odd jobs I exposed myself to. For example, any strenuous job now is not for me as it makes me breath heavily like an asthmatic patient; any job that requires standing for long or bending down not for me due to broken waist (although these might be solvable issues but for now, I can't tell cos I have no money to visit health facility).

Moving on, while I may be thanking God for the academic success (even though the school is yet to issue me certificate) but I'm having strong feelings about myself. I feel like I have failed in life. I feel like I am a failure. My mates who got admission into university immediately after secondary school are gainfully employed today, living in comfortable apartment (built or rented), married with kids, have their own car and generally doing well. Even the ones who didn't further but venture into learning trade are doing well too. On the other hand, at 33, I have virtually nothing to show for it. Still living in one thatch house, poor, hungry and starving, no wife, no kid(s) (not even a serious girlfriend), no job, no car and nothing to show for my 33 years on earth. This is why I'm feeling like I have failed in life and it has made me to always be ashamed of myself and always trying to avoid meeting my mates who are doing well.

Also, looking at the country Nigeria, most employers recruit under 30. @33, what are my chances of
landing a good job if I refuse to forge age and go for service but collect exemption letter? What are even the possibility of getting a job as I have no capital for business? Note: between 2019 and now, I've learnt several online money making skills but yet to make a kobo out of it all. Note also: ordinarily, I wouldn't seek employment (private or government) because I'm multi talented e.g in football, entertainment or business but these talents need money to develop which is what I'm lacking.

My questions:
Please what do you all think? Do you think I have failed or I'm a failure in life? What is the future holding for me? As at today, the only thing I can boast of is "I am a graduate". Nothing more...like I said, poor, hungry and starving.

Help me with good pieces of advice please before my mind begins to consider evil as fastest way of making money. Thanks.
What is your definition of failure?
Because I really don't understand ?
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by Kokaine(m): 7:16pm On May 05, 2021
Op go to sterling bank and ask for the newly improved nirsal crg program. The managers are aware of it.

Also ask them for their new product I can't recall the name. Its like a credit card where you can meet registered vendors for products where you sell and return their money.

ALLAH said in the Holy Qur'an: " inamal husri yusroh, was inamal yusri yusroh"

Meaning:
For every difficulty, there is ease.
Verily again, for every difficulty, there is ease.

It was mentioned twice. Islamic scholars are of the opinion that the significance of reiterating it is that every problem has more solutions than one.

Again ALLAH said in the Qur'an that. "LA yukalifullahu nafsan ila Hus aha"

Meaning: ALLAH does not lay a burden on anyone that he won't be able to bear. For you to be going through these in life, it means your resilience has been ordained by GOD until HE determines for you another situation. So bear patiently while you strive.

May ALLAH guide us aright and save us from the fitnah of the grave and that of the hereafter. Ya ALLAH! do not let this duniya become of Paramount concern to us, nor the ultimate of our knowledge. Ameen.

1 Like

Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by OvaSabi1(f): 7:16pm On May 05, 2021
You spoke of your school results. What field and what is your CGPA? Respond asap.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by AugustusA1(m): 7:17pm On May 05, 2021
You are striving just Wel, you not a failure . Failure comes when you give up on yur pursuit. 33yrs isn’t nothing I guarantee you were not the oldest in your class.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by OvaSabi1(f): 7:18pm On May 05, 2021
Greatlee54:
I left the university about the same age(2015) with a very similar background, I have done almost all the menial jobs you mentioned; I was frustrated and depressed after school with no job, a first class degree but I kept believing in myself.
U have to keep the hope alive and never compare yourself with ppl who had both age and connection as advantage. My pastor failed me nobody believed in me , I felt ashamed of myself but I never gave up! I hit the streets, damn the certificates n hoped on God. Bought my first car same year and started building a brand new house thereafter (top notch and almost completed), have never done a salary job after university education and I have the prettiest wife on earth.
Family failed me, Nigeria failed me, friends failed me, religion failed me but God and my beautiful wife stood by me!
Try new things, change your location, hope on God, believe in yourself, humble up n start little. God help you.

Congratulations on your success but your response wasn't very helpful. You didn't say exactly what you did on the streets.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by ibechris(m): 7:19pm On May 05, 2021
NoFucksToGive:
Without reading I label you a failure !!! For the fact you need the validation of total strangers says it all

You are weak and mentally immature totally unfit for any leadership position



Easy...this guy does not need this.
U dont just know what it means to break even from poverty.
I have been through it and I can sure say it was hell.
Re: Am I A Failure? Please Rate Me. by gbagyiza: 7:21pm On May 05, 2021
You r not a failure until you have accepted defeat in life. You lack confidence n belief in yourself reason you see yourself as a failure. Bro. You r not a failure, have confidence n believe in yourself as you pursue meaningful goals in life. Don't give up, keep the fire burning.

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