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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Another Marriage About To Crash. (66752 Views)
Is It Proper For A Woman To Take A Child(ren) Along With Her To Another Marriage / My Wife Is A Thief & Greedy: My One-Month Marriage About To Crash / My Wife's Sister Is About To Crash My Marriage, Please Help (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by murphyibiam15(m): 10:57am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Worksunlimited:Lmao |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by mygem: 10:57am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Honestly Men are becoming the victims of domestic violence and verbal abuse…Most young ladies enter marriage with the entitlement mentality and with unrealistic expectations from what they see on social media.A man needs peace in his home and if a woman fails to achieve this the marriage is likely to go under as modern men don’t have the patience anymore.My Case is not different from yours ,my marriage is a burden on me presently,I hope I won’t get to my elastic limit soon. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by Samcent: 10:59am On Jul 17, 2021 |
libertyfather:If the op was replying the verbal and emotional abuse with physical abuse, the equation would have been balanced and we would be having a different narration. For me, verbal and emotional abuse is as bad as physical abuse. But because physical abuse, most times, have easily verifiable evidence more than verbal/emotional abuse, the society tend to frown more at the former while making excuses for the later. While I am reluctant to subscribe divorce as a solution to any marital problem, I strongly condemn both physical and verbal abuse in marriage. Nobody, husband or wife, should be repeatedly subjected to these kind of abuses in a marriage. I pray every day to God, that there will never be an occasion that will make me hit my wife or abuse her in any way. My wife is also sufficiently aware, that any form of verbal or emotional abuse from her, will have consequences. On a general note, I think the limits of what is allowed in a marriage relationship is set during courtship and in the first 3 to 5 years of marriage. But unfortunately, many young men and women, are carried away by 'romantic hollywood/bollywood's fantasy movies' that they become detached from the realities of marriage and the hard work that is needed for it to succeed. For the op, never you resort to physical assault neither should you take the abuse any further. Seek for outside help from trusted family members and friends. Take legitimate steps to keep your sanity intact- take the easy way if possible or the hard way if necessary. 2 Likes |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by UDUJ(m): 10:59am On Jul 17, 2021 |
dacblogger: Just imagine your summation: No wonder your wife is always abusing you. I don't need to know you physically but from your write up I can easily decipher your level of IQ. 3 Likes |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by Onlinebar: 11:00am On Jul 17, 2021 |
chatinent:F*ck the Christian ground of adultery Once my peace is threatened, I'm calling it quits. Adultery or not. 1 Like |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by BREYZ: 11:00am On Jul 17, 2021 |
chatinent: This guy no normal. |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by alizma: 11:01am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Adlac:Those raised by both parents are not totally excluded. You need to add that men should observe the spread of authority in their prospective in-laws house before they say I do. If the woman is in charge, the young lady is likely going to see it as a normal thing for her to be in charge. 8 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by skj1377(m): 11:01am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Chairman Dont tell us about your problems even roses have thorns. Tell us how you met what made you marry her because I know you had other options including the one that worshiped you but you preferred this particular devil. There are many marriages made in hell these days Pecoleee345: 1 Like |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by MummyD2020(f): 11:01am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Tajbol4splend: They think say marriage na by muscle. Just yesterday i was discussing with hubby and said, soldier don tire u? Macho man, u don tire for wahala. E say e really don tire na calmness level now oh. Its not by gra gra. Even me sef d same thing. You will be doing i dont take shit, this one that one. Na u go tire. Im not excusing terrible behaviour. Op single people that still depend on mummy thank u plenty for here oh 1 Like |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by lordally(m): 11:01am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Yusufisraelj: What you're stating is not the obvious bro!! Lemme ask you are you married?? And if you are have you ever been in an abusive Marriage?? Did you grow up in one?? If you ever experienced any of that then you would understand that this is a man speaking out of Compressed frustration!!! Guy e no easy!!! 2 Likes |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by BelieveAfrica: 11:02am On Jul 17, 2021 |
You are lucky you have never raised your finger on her. Please, whatever she does, don't hit her. Take your stand and make your decision. 1 Like |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by alizma: 11:02am On Jul 17, 2021 |
BREYZ:Most of those typing rubbish re not married. |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by Baltimore22(m): 11:03am On Jul 17, 2021 |
I once dated one... She almost gave me high blood pressure Pecoleee345: |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by LagbajaTheBEREAN: 11:03am On Jul 17, 2021 |
SpruceMediaNG: Redpill Manual, Chapter 3 verse 16 |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by UDUJ(m): 11:03am On Jul 17, 2021 |
alizma: You are very very very correct. This your statement sums it up. Respect 2 Likes |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by EyeTaspirant(m): 11:04am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Thank God I am still single and not considering searching. This marriage thing be like say na women e pay pass Pecoleee345: |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by Kzinne: 11:04am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Pecoleee345:you should stay together with a woman for like 2 months before marriage to avoid stories that touch |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by Born2winnx: 11:05am On Jul 17, 2021 |
chatinent:Your a simp assx nigga. A weakling, he should continue taking the psychologically abuse from her? Weak asz niga you are. |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by Lotusgoddess(f): 11:05am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Pecoleee345: Please you made sense until when you mentioned a single mom. I was raised by one and I've never insulted anyone before or reacted out of anger. My mom thought us to love our dad regardless, even when he didn't provide for us. So please, that single mom part wasn't necessary. I couldn't have asked for a better mom than mine 6 Likes |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by UltimateSpice: 11:06am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Interesting times we are.
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Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by INCREDIBLE007(m): 11:06am On Jul 17, 2021 |
bros did you noticed these traits in her or not |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by lordally(m): 11:06am On Jul 17, 2021 |
dacblogger: You say he might have withheld some useful information... Wait do you expect him to Wash his whole family issues online? Habah nau and you say you are married! Please you should know better nau 2 Likes |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by Goldbw122(m): 11:06am On Jul 17, 2021 |
You already know her character and thr way she feel and makes you feel during dating, and if you don't want the relationship just talk to your partner because when it gets to marriage there is no tolerance because that is when your real characters comes out, |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by blueheart(m): 11:07am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Eyah Sorry Op. That's toxic. Always best to do due diligence in a quest to choose a partner. You learnt the hard way. 1 Like |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by INCREDIBLE007(m): 11:07am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Lotusgoddess: gbamsolutely 3 Likes |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by BluntTheApostle(m): 11:08am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Romanoff: Great advice. However, there is a problem with this type of advice. The problem is that it takes two to tango in a marriage. Advising one person may not be enough. Like I used to advise, the two people in the relationship must be willing to meet each other half way. When I was pastoring, there was a seminar that I attended for pastors and their spouses (or fiancees and fiances). The main speaker was trying to advise men. His advise was that men should always be mature because women are created to nag. That once a man understands this, then he won't have any problems. This is foolish advice. First of all, if a man is willing to meet a woman half way by controlling his anger while being debased by her tongue, what stops a woman from meeting her man half way by controlling her tongue? You expect one adult to be mature at all times while encouraging the other adult in the union to be rude all in the name of "women are created that way; their power is in their tongue". When we encourage women to nag while telling men to walk away, we are not helping any marriage. Because nagging is as much a bad behavior as physical abuse. Which is why when I counseled, I used to ensure that the couple is present. If a wife comes to me, I always insist on seeing her husband and giving a joint counseling. 9 Likes |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by kushme: 11:09am On Jul 17, 2021 |
dacblogger: what kind of psychologist wouldn't know that the mind of the average man in a relationship or marriage desires more sex than companion with a woman. Have you asked yourself why most men could easily be with attractive but dull/toxic women? companionship is the main purpose my arse.. companionship na later thing. Sex na first thought. You know nothing about the mind of the average man. If not for sex, you think most men will tolerate the slightest provocation from a female. You better start observing people and your immediate environment for your own professional good while you apply those book theories only when necessary. 5 Likes |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by Yusufisraelj(m): 11:09am On Jul 17, 2021 |
lordally: It is well. Thanks for your observations. God will help him. 1 Like |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by crossfire47(m): 11:10am On Jul 17, 2021 |
Worksunlimited:My brother, mean is an understatement and the way I see it, most of them share this trait in common. Ever wondered why the serpent had to approach the woman in the bible to Disobey God's orders?? That's the reason why we all are in this mess today in life. 1 Like |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by MansoryMX(m): 11:10am On Jul 17, 2021 |
pansophist: I respect you bro. I needed this advice right now ah swear. Op they learn for wetin I dey go through. These can bring out the beast in a man if one isn’t careful 3 Likes
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Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by Awoleesu(m): 11:11am On Jul 17, 2021 |
My dear, If I say I don't understand you, I'll be lying. But like someone noted in the comments section; you should have seen the signs she's abusive while courting. I however understand also that when young people fall in love, they tend to overlook and forgive things easily hence the maxim; Love is blind...(and Marriage cures the blindness!) Now, things are bad and you're thinking of ending it, huh? So, let's look at some indices here; * I don't know your background and how you two got hooked, but I want to assume there is at least one person whom she respects (be it family, cleric, elder, friend etc), it is in our native wisdom to get such a person to prevail on her to see reasons. * There is the psychological angle to resolving marital issues too! I remember one funny episode in mine. When she started frustrating me, I had woken up in the middle of the night and started soliloquizing... I started saying things like I was going nuts! (It was deliberate tho)...she got up and panicked! She started shouting "Jesus! Jesus! Not my portion!" She blew tongues as much as she could When I saw that she had lost all the 'madness' in her to fear, I came back and quietly went to sleep. She didn't sleep all through the night - practically kept watch over me! . At the wake of the morning, she demanded to know what happened, and I simply told her I don't know. I said all I remembered was that I wanted to commit suicide, but for some reasons I lost the determined strength to do so ( playing on her psyche to think her prayers stopped whatever went wrong!) After that episode, we talked and resolved some issues... My point is,; desperate problems require desperate solutions! Do anything, anything at all (dramatic, crazy etc) to bring her to a serious deliberation... If you succeed, you'll be proud of yourself. If not, you'd still be glad you went the extra mile to save your marriage! * Then the spiritual angle. I do not know your spiritual orientation, but I do know that praying together works in settling marital disputes. Thankfully, you're the Man here. My Dad told me during one of my visits to him when we had one of our squabbles, that I am the Priest of my family! Now, if you'll borrow this philosophy, see yourself as the priest of your home. Pray for her, preach to her, be a good example to her, lead her spiritually, provide guidance and support as much as you can, and love her. Lastly, like I once advised a fellow here; know that the pains of divorce is very excruciating to the heart - are you prepared to go through it? May God save your marriage! 4 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Another Marriage About To Crash. by UDUJ(m): 11:11am On Jul 17, 2021 |
crossfire47: Because the serpent and that gender share similar traits 1 Like |
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