₦airaland Forum

Gamesmart:
What stewpid post!

Was he a man on the streets?

Normal human being speaking to love interests or friends for period of time forget to mention their kids in their stories?

A sensible human being does not know having a kid is a factor in relationships that should be disclosed?

Stop talking nonsense and think you are making "mature sense".

. I got her number and we got talking. We soon advanced to long calls, flirting and risqué jokes. Then she posted a boy on her WhatsApp status one day and the caption rocked me to my foundation. I asked and she confirmed that the little boy was her son. Okay.

adanny01:
Trust me, its not better. Giving the same ingredients, food cooked by different people taste differently. Time is usually the difference. The time to tell is always important to every case. Too early will jinx it, too late is a disaster. Some men are aware even before the ask the girl out.

luminouz:
You are wrong.

The amount of testimonials I have is enough proof for me.

Last reply

MrBrownJay1:
a single mother comes as a package, and no matter how you wanna look at it, one way or the other, the child will be part of your life. yes it aint for everybody to raise another man's child, but if you set boundaries etc, it should be very easy. you cant marry a single mother and not be involved in that childs life.



we are not here to judge people who have premarital sex nor are we here to give unreasonable solutions... the reality is that people will have premarital sex whether we like it or not, because not everyone's life is dictated by some holybook. now, is it wrong to have premarital sex?! NO ITS NOT. so long as you protect yourself accordingly.

but hey, accidents happen everywhere in life...just like the holiest xtians who goes to church every single day can come out of church and get hit by a drunk driver. its called LIFE!

Davash222:
Ask 99.7536% of Nigeria single mothers about the father of their child/ren, this is always their response.

Does it mean they are foolish or blind to open legs for irresponsible men?

When dating a single mom, always remember, her child comes first before you. Also remember, the father of the child has 100% access to her kpekus.

Godspeed to all prospective Single mothers' attendees.

Romanoff:
Yet, if you tell both male and female to stop fornicating, they will come for you.

Many are having premarital sex and children are one of the consequences of premarital sex.

You people frown at people doing abortions but won't marry a single mum or won't abstain from sex.

If your partner gets pregnant for you, na una go first say make she abort am, yet, some of you won't marry a woman who has done abortion before.

Una no see say this premarital sex thing no worth am las las?

MODFIED


Women, from the response my comment is getting, it's safe to say you're on the receiving end.

These guys won't marry you with a child, they won't marry you if they know you've had an abortion or abortions, they won't marry you if post pills mess with your fertility.

Is it not best to close your legs till you get married?

The posts about dating or marrying single mothers should be a deterrent, cause them plenty for Romance section. They will quote Okafor's law for you as a reason to not marry a single mother.

Ladies, close leg o.

mikovo2002:
I am presently dating a single mother, she had never review the father of her son. All she always tell me is that she didn't know the wereabout of her child father. She put her son first. I am just like second fiddle in the house
She even bought a land in the name of her son bearing the child surname. She save her money for towards the upkeep of her child while my money is for us

Davash222:
Ask 99.7536% of Nigeria single mothers about the father of their child/ren, this is always their response.

Does it mean they are foolish or blind to open legs for irresponsible men?

When dating a single mom, always remember, her child comes first before you. Also remember, the father of the child has 100% access to her kpekus.

Godspeed to all prospective Single mothers' attendees.

luminouz:
Please stop all this talk. You are very wrong.
Saying a woman with a child doesn't owe you any upfront revelation is simply BS. When should she tell me then? After the first few fûcks? A few thousand fūcks? 3 months to wedding? Or when I'm about 130 years old?

Most single mothers I know always tell you upfront. That way, the man can decide if he wants to stay or not. Secondly,it gives no room for pretense and lies. What you see is what you get and that's how it should be.

Are you sure you are a man? It's very weird hearing this from a guy who wouldn't want to cater for other men's kids.

Romanoff:
Yet, if you tell both male and female to stop fornicating, they will come for you.

Many are having premarital sex and children are one of the consequences of premarital sex.

You people frown at people doing abortions but won't marry a single mum or won't abstain from sex.

If your partner gets pregnant for you, na una go first say make she abort am, yet, some of you won't marry a woman who has done abortion before.

Una no see say this premarital sex thing no worth am las las?

MODFIED

Women, from the response my comment is getting, it's safe to say you're on the receiving end.

These guys won't marry you with a child, they won't marry you if they know you've had an abortion or abortions, they won't marry you if post pills mess with your fertility.

Is it not best to close your legs till you get married?

The posts about dating or marrying single mothers should be a deterrent, cause them plenty for Romance section. They will quote Okafor's law for you as a reason to not marry a single mother.

Ladies, close leg o.

Davash222:
Ask 99.7536% of Nigeria single mothers about the father of their child/ren, this is always their response.

Does it mean they are foolish or blind to open legs for irresponsible men?

When dating a single mom, always remember, her child comes first before you. Also remember, the father of the child has 100% access to her kpekus.

Godspeed to all prospective Single mothers' attendees.

AfroKnight:
“Where is his father?”

“He is not responsible. He is not involved in his son’s life. I take care of him alone.”


Share your thoughts please.

Toks2008:
I agree most of them are very very confused regarding where they place their baby daddy.

But if you meet a reasonable one you won't regret it especially the one that has a child who is Less dependent on her.

And let me bust your bubbles, even the single ladies are no exception, they usually have strong emotional bonding to their exes so whether you go with single mum or single lady it is still the same story.

Just make sure you know the story behind their breakup so you will have an idea of how strong their bonding is.

adanny01:
Good luck.

Just because majority says its the way to go does not mean its the right way.

Goodnews007:
[s][/s]Nigerian men and their ego. Always finding new ways to make women believe they are 2nd class citizens.
Today, its the turn of single mothers.

Little wonder your women marry oyinbo once they set foot outside the country. Who wants an egotistical man who can never do wrong and who sets himself on a pedestal as a partner?

And the ones that have been wifed by you; many are suffering but few are talking about it.
Though, judging from recent happenings in marriages, the wheat is gradually being separated from the chaff.

Poorly trained boys who never grew up mentally presenting themselves as men. Whoever trained this generation of men that feel they are a God's gift to women and should be seen and treated as such, did a very poor job.

Olosho, kpekus, vaginarians, fishy, the future is female, evening newspaper, and so many vile words used to describe women in this app daily, and all from the same men who see themselves as the best thing to ever happen to womenfolk.
All nairaland topics are flooded with statements that demean and degrade women daily, I ask, to what end?

If a woman seeks for a divorce, she cannot stay in marriage.
If she aborts for u after pushing her to, she cannot be wifed.
If she leaves a relationship for another man, olosho
If she's a single mother, tear race my brother (her kpekus is for everybody)

If she doesn't marry on time, avoid her(evening newspaper)

What makes you guys think that ur womenfolk existence lies on your opinion and why are you trying so hard to push it in their faces that they are subject to how u portray them?

And you still wonder why divorce is on the rise, the scale is gradually falling out of their eyes.

These days u expect your women to be educated, polished and hardworking, not housewives and dependent on you which is a blessing cos it has made so many women independent these days, but u still carry an age old mindset of men being seen as Spotless as snow to this jet age.

You guys should change ur mindset, it's all in your head. Being a Nigerian is hard enough already, must u make life harder by being mean, inconsiderate and so judgemental to women?

Haba!

Every woman get flaws, so does every man.
See the beauty in everyone, let love lead.[s][/s]

perambulator:
You will never find a single mother divorcee or seperated woman who will tell you it is her fault she is a single mother/divorced or separated.

it's never their fault!!!! Even the one that went to sperm bank will blame the donor of the sperm for her situation.

Awoleesu:
So, what happened to that (boldened) status?

placeofallure:
It's not a disease to be a single mother.

No man should be coerced into taking responsibility of a child who isn't his. Strictly, it should be of his own volition.

People change, total transformation.
Everyone should know that. So, it may not be poor judgement on their part

It's not all the time that a single mother has affiliations still with the baby daddy. Some don't even want to see the men anywhere around them let alone allowing him in the child's life.

Different strokes for different folks.

I am not a single mother but I have a thing for them.

lovchalice:
I got married

Gamesmart:
Why should I give my love to a pregnant lady I did not impregnate?

This your useless shaming tactics to get your selfish ends?

Gamesmart:
What an incredible foolish set of questions.

So when a man beats his own biological kids, it is because he is "dragging to come first before the kids"? Or he is in competition with the kids?

Incredibly foolish!

I smell a single mother here. And definitely the type men should avoid because she will never be logical with you when raising her kids, she just needs you to be around to pay for them and save her. She needs you to sacrifice your interests, assets and focus on only her own. Her means of delivering this selfish agenda will be the foolish and illogical reasoning and shaming statements like this "Can't you share in d affection".

Her child can misbehave and disrespect you while you pay for his or her life and all she will tell you is "Leave my child alone! Can't you share in d affection otherwise you are not a real man".

Avoid like Coronavirus!

NaijirianKing:
They're not really cashing in or even out. In the US, child support, which is money paid to baby-mothers every month can be as low as $314 a month, while the average cost of renting a place is $1,200 a month.

This is why most single mothers are struggling and living in some of the worst conditions in the country.

In the US most of these women live in government assisted facilities and neighborhoods called "housing projects."

If you have any relatives in the states ask around. These places are breeding grounds for chaos, criminality and drugs.

Many baby-mothers hope and pray a rich man will magically appear and save them, but most never progress and their daughters follow in the steps and a vicious cycle is created. 84% prisoners in the US come from homes with single mothers.

The problem is Nigerians are so quick to copy copy, follow follow, without really analyzing the habits they are picking up.

It's sad Nigerian women are increasingly becoming baby mamas....

lawkenoz:
Where you say Zero possibility men hear potential possibility! That connection to the child's father is always there whether you choose to use it or not. It's a door and it opens both ways, if you don't use that connection he might decide to use it, and then showing up and causing problems for you and your family when you least expect.

I had no qualms if they were keeping tabs and in communication at first, after all it's his kid and if it was up to me I wouldn't support keeping the kid away from him if he was interested. But she claimed he abandoned the child, and was not in the picture so I thought no communication whatsoever was going on in that regard, I was prepared to deal with that eventuality anyways but still got burned.

Once you have a kid with someone there's always an eternal connection, you might not use it but he might and will eventually, all these complications might not be worth it for a lot of dudes.

I wouldn't call her dumb cuz I have no idea about thier history, all efforts to bring up the matter about their relationship always made her cry and emotional I had to just let it go. Some people are just weak around certain people especially when they share a lot of history and a kid, all sorts of things could go wrong and I wouldn't advice any young man who wants long term peace to go for it.
The potential risk involved isn't worth it....let single dad's and single moms have each other, that's a better deal in my opinion!

Terrier99:
1. Why u go wan Beat her kid?
2. Is it that you dragging to come first before her kids?
3. Can't you share in d affection?
4. Must it be a competition?

I swear, this is exactly how single mothers think. So, if the kid is naughty, I can't correct the kid? Because I corrected a naughty kid, it means that I'm dragging for attention with the kid?

You are talking exactly like a single mom.

drealaz24:
It's an inborn strategy with every guys. Once he appears humble, saying sweet words, blaming himself and rubbing your back or shoulder, then small hug. Hard girl hard girl don finish be that.

Terrier99:
1. Why u go wan Beat her kid?
2. Is it that you dragging to come first before her kids?
3. Can't you share in d affection?
4. Must it be a competition?

I swear, this is exactly how single mothers think. So, if the kid is naughty, I can't correct the kid? Because I corrected a naughty kid, it means that I'm dragging for attention with the kid?

You are talking exactly like a single mom.

jiboladhino:
We guys are hypocrites castigating single mothers , but when it comes to single fathers we have no problem with them dating single girls abi .... Nigerians and double standard

steveekeoma:
Some men can be responsible while dating but can be irresponsible when issue of i am pregnant comes up.
However, a man can do anything to get woman most especially when the woman is
feeling stubborn to get and at last littered her for exhibiting pride in the first place.

For have access to the kpeku is rare to see a woman does that the a man she has seen as irresponsible.