₦airaland Forum

I will suggest that you don't jump into conclusion. It is very easy to catch a cheating spouse.

First step is to bug her phone to get all conversations ( calls, WhatApp Msg and messages) remotely.

Second step is to announce that you will be traveling for a week. That will give her all the space she needed to be free with her phone call and also see whoever she is seeing, while you get all necessary informations.

The last step is to make decision based on your findings.

hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.

My guy, please watch out, it's clear something is not right from your story.If she's not cheating already she's about starting. Nothing kills a man faster than a promiscous wife

You also need to work on yourself. Women don't joke with their kids, even the promiscous ones. Something you did must have push her out. Find out and save your marriage asap.

Iyaebe:
If this is all you've got to accuse her of infidelity then go work on your mindset because you've got no proof and evidence.

A mother whose kids are in the hospital playing around anyhow who does that. Even the dad was busy at work but yet had to make time for the kids.
You're simply irresponsible for supporting nonsense.

@all men. You wanna know if your wife cheats?. Get hold of her phone, and ask for her password if she use one. The interest is not about checking her phone, but in checking her countenance. I hope I solve your puzzle? Lol

MemeRoyal:
Maybe there is something,
Maybe there is nothing
This situation can very well happen.
You don't want her to leave kids with the maid, so maybe she just wanted to do a quick dash to the house without upsetting you just as she said.
You're already suspicious and now you pick on every little thing.

This situation is not enough.
Allow her breathe, when you have concrete proof then you can talk

She didn't want to upset him but she was yelling at him over the phone. How is that? That woman is not even a good liar. You avoid upsetting someone you respect not the one you yell at. Something is eating her up and I believe she had issues with her alphamale manfriend who she can't challenge so she transferred the aggression on the simp she married, the one she believes she can treat anyhow and get away with it. Many cheating women in this forum know exactly what I'm saying.

Please if you have money! Get DNA test done first.Then don’t make know u are monitoring her movement but if you like your life.monitor. Her to the extent of duplicating her WhatsApp ..it’s hard but you have to if you want the best for your kids and your life

hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.

Iyaebe:
If this is all you've got to accuse her of infidelity then go work on your mindset because you've got no proof and evidence.

Demanding for proof and evidence just because one doesn't have, does not justify bany wrong.

People who are too fast to demand for evidence bare actually always guilty as accused.

Telling foolish lies is not proof? Are you fr rn? Did you type this?

Iyaebe:
If this is all you've got to accuse her of infidelity then go work on your mindset because you've got no proof and evidence.

hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.

E no reach this level na, your wahala too much!

Lovebliss2:
You have trust issues.
Work on it and don't destroy your marriage.

He don't have any trust issues, his wife is cheating on him. This is not new.

aminusodiq:
similar to what my friends gf did to him. My guy paid for her transport to visit her school because she needed to collect her certificate.

Babe reach ogun, babe no gree pick call again. When she picks, she'll yell and drop within 2 secs. I tried calling too, but she never picked till the following morning. Guess what, she was online and replying texts after some hours.

Now i told my guy to request for a video call, and na where wahala. Begin be that. Shes someone who would do v.call without even asking on a norm. But on this day she said she was on queue and cant pick call.
Guess what? She was on queue from 10am till 6pm as she never picked any of those calls.

Well i adviced my guy to leave her alone and wait till she return before we do our own counter attack. On the third day... She called when she reached the park and still had the odercity to request for return transport. ... Request outrightly denied.

Conclusion: me and my friend already made a plan for her.... Guy already let go of all issues and they are back to normal, no more free money and gifts. But, according to my friend. She has a juicy pusssy and shes still useful. She'll forever remain a side chick and shes only meant for fucking, till she realise the game herself. She lives in close proximity, and shes the best fit for that . She came last sunday though they were fucking tirelessly while i listened to the werey ringtone in the siting room.

I once told her to ask for cheating clues next time.... Shes a very poor cheater!!!

your story sweet bro

Why are you forgetting the fact she lied foolishly? Is she your sister? Tell the truth as you see fit if or don't say anything

Skyfornia:
You don't trust that woman one bit...so what are you still doing with her? I'm even irritated with your actions...why let your marriage get to this level ? Has she done anything in the past that prompted you to start questioning her moves?

Personally once trust is lost in a relationship, then it is no longer worth it.

chatinent:
Trust issues...but there are two ways to see it from.

I will make my point straightforward and will not mince words.

1. Inasmuch as you tried so much to make it look like you are very caring, the real truth was that you were just suspiciously thinking she was cheating and bombing her with calls and she got irritated. Don't get me wrong...she might have ulterior motives. She might not too. But if she hadn't and it was about the quick sales, if you guys had no trust issues, she would have told you.

You called her to ask where she was and immediately re-called her when you got to the hospital to ask why she wasn't in the hospital. Sb you just called to ask where she was?

Infections aren't that a very big deal like near-death diseases! You made it look like your kids being in the hospital was a solid prove to welcome criticisms against your wife for leaving them behind. She was with the maid you employed! Stop making it look like the maid was a foreign devil abeg...no bi she dey take care of dem normal normal?

Inasmuch as I don't support cheating and her picking business over health, baba, if your wife is not cheating and you are bombing her like this with suspicion, you'll push her to cheat! It works like magic.


Build your trust issues.

2. If she is seemingly promiscuous, stop assuming and gather evidences. If I suspect my wife is cheating, I wouldn't let her know I suspect her to avoid her covering tracks. I'd make sure I have my evidences. For example, if I know she isn't in the hospital, I would park and watch who she returns with from afar. I would call her on video once and if she didn't receive, I wouldn't even receive her voice calls...because she have to explain it. I would fake going to work one day only to secretly follow her to all places she goes..waiting for my evidences to add up.

I love evidences! Suspicion is not enough! It is with my evidences I'll react with conviction....not assumptions!

If your intuition is telling you she is cheating and you aren't making any move to catch her red-handed to satisfy that intuition, you are also making another big mistake because she is not cheating until you catch her red-handed cheating.

Marriage matters aren't based on assumptions!

This your number 2 make sense die.
I was married to someone I am suspecting of infidelity. I confronted her and she said I am being silly and stupid.
I have to gather a video evidence of her knacking before eye cleared her. I went straight to her village with my family and ended it all.
Get evidence and discharge her,don’t assume anything.
But mind you that once your mind tells you otherwise,na so e be o.
Trust your intuition.

All the answers you seek are right there on your wife's phone. You need to read all messages she exchanges with her phone contacts, especially on WhatsApp. You should also check the details of all credit alerts on her phone. Who has been sending what and for what purpose ?

If your wife is playing any game behind your back,trust me a particular contact on her phone will stand out by way of frequent calls and exchange of messages. What you'll find out may either make or mar your heart ! So ,be ready to face it all. You only have to be very smart about how you check her phone without raising any suspicion because once she knows that you've been checking her phone, she'll start deleting evidences of her infidelity if there is any.

Already,there is a serious trust issue in your marriage and unless you're able to convince yourself that your wife is "clean", your marriage will never remain same again ! Her phone holds all keys to every answer you seek; check that phone !

Oga, your wife is cheating. Do not let anyone gaslight you. I believe it is time to do DNA test on your kids and make sure she is aware of it, that way, you would have communicated your suspicion to her.

Tokskob2008:
He has got no proof yet the woman keeps dribbling him like Messi or Ronaldo

Or why is it rocket science for couples to be straight forward with each other if there isn't any skeleton in the closet

Op just calm down, for everything hidden under the sun shall be made open one day. You just have to be patient and watchful.

Op, u have really talk so well, u r really son of ur father, dont mind some people wey don turn to marriage counselors in nairaland without wisdom. God bless u bro cuz u hv said it all.

Don't be confused. Talk to her and also seek the face of God

Iyaebe:
If this is all you've got to accuse her of infidelity then go work on your mindset because you've got no proof and evidence.

Since he is a detective, he sould have piped low until he has a hard fact to support his suspicion before confronting her. With this jumpy attitude of his, he will never catch her even if she cheats.

goodheart01:
Refusing a video call, abandoning her lovely children, not being at the right place she told u she was and her yelling at you are all signs of a cheating wife. Be wise!!

Except is a mugu that will not know she's cheating. All these are very basic sign anyone will know.

I guess she is an igbo woman from imo state, that's thier life just to frustrate and stress you.

Iyaebe:
If this is all you've got to accuse her of infidelity then go work on your mindset because you've got no proof and evidence.

If any lady tells you the bolded, my brother, begin to count your loss & be ready to move on. You would hardly catch such a lady red handed; they are experts.

@OP, do not jump into conclusion yet.

Lovebliss2:
Yes, I saw that too, she kept telling lies about her movements. She gets her own for the head.

. Trust is earned. That woman has no respect for him. I may be wrong tho

hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.

This is very simple. Confirm her story or rather excuses. Did she really take and Uber? If so it should be easy for her to give u the information about the cab.

2. Confirm the modeling whatever stuff for her customer in the hospital cos I don’t exactly understand what that ment.

If all these are really what she was doing it shouldn’t be hard for her to tell u everything in details and who to confirm from.

If she asks u why all these tell her cos u aren’t comfortable with certain things she does and then covering it up.


I still cannot say if she’s cheating or Ure just paranoid based on this event alone until u confirm her excuses are further lies then that will be very disturbing.

Lovebliss2:
You have trust issues.
Work on it and don't destroy your marriage.

There will be no trust issues if everyone act right in life, how you see am, imagine a man doing same to you, you would feel that way, it’s human nature when tky love your wife or husband and kids.

Kobojunkiee:
There is a way to ask a question that would cause one to reason it a simple inquiry. The manner the OP asked most every question, seemed heavily loaded from the start and this because he approached this as if an interrogation.

You don't interrogate a loved one without expecting tempers to flair unless you live in bubble where it all has to be about you and you alone

Stop supporting bad behavior . They are married. So he has every reason to know her Movement ok?

Only God will help us we that are about to get married

Sometimes, if I have a very hot transaction to do that will benefit the family and I feel my husband would be sceptical about? I just don't pick his calls until I'm done.
For example, when I invested some of our finances in treasury bill back in 2019, I had to dodge the question of where I was for the few hours that I was at the bank.
I have done this many times than I can count and it had nothing to do with Infidelity.
Sometimes when I go to market late because I was lazying around all day, I avoid picking his calls until I'm back home. Because if I pick, he'll begin to complain that he's almost home and I haven't cooked and that I'll rush the cooking and it won't come out nice etc etc.
All these and more are not related to infidelity na

TheKingIsHere:
I hope you know that telling lies is a sign of cheating?

Most people don't know, telling lies is cheating.

hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.

i think this is not a good evidence that she is cheating. The only way to know is by checking her phone or you hire a private investigator. However, I think madam is becoming detached from the family. Probably quest for money and material things at the detriment of family bond and union.

yes,u av every reason to be suspicious but be cool abt it.no more sexual rltnshp for now and be at alert!

Iyaebe:
...you've got no proof and evidence.

So,no proof yet?
Well, I pray that God grant your sons women with such characters.
Just say aameen if you think that the woman has not yet done anything wrong.