AGurlnoname:


Abegi, you men on Nairaland always come online to say whatever you like about women. I know things like this happens, the best he can do is to pray and with faith and hardwork he will surely overcome. My problem here is you men have more to say about "women" but forget the roles y'all play in some women life's too.

Pray over what?. You mean non Christians can not have successful marriage. Marriage has nothing to do with prayers please

everythinggirly:
It's good to pray for the right one even before marriage, someone that loves you can't hurt you. Love never fails.

Some men really have luck in marriage buh some don't. Please men if u marry better womab abeg treat her like a queen

Saynoomore:


Another lunatic on the loose! Your reasoning and writing are completely disjointed very meaningless gibberish! Go back and read what I wrote again - that's if you have any comprehension skills !

Again, it's "taking" and not "taken"! olodo!

Na only wahala this gender sabi!

leave her alone and her poor home training. Just imagine what she wrote

Cuttycool:
Stop giving marriage a bad mage. Do not discourage men. You didn't take time to chose the right woman to marry.

From what you said, your wife was not working as well, and you were jobless and broke. You men should always encourage your wife to get something doing, or you help set up a business for her, especially since she may start having babies.

There is so much sense in what you have said.

Although I think this right partner stuff is overrated.... Ladies pretend a lot to get what they want.

Therefore Majority of the time men don't know what they walking into

yuping:
Stop using money to chase woman what you will attract is nuisance and oga you did not forgive her you just settle for her like that. Chase that goat away, this is not about you being broke, a woman who abandoned is own baby.

I would have supported chasing her away but what's the probability of him not getting a worse lady, you can see some of them here already supporting her

Saynoomore:


Na them be this!

OP, your own small na. It's the same thing everywhere. The issue of packing their miserable luggages out of their matrimonial homes to their mother's house is a very common behaviour with over 90% of them. The funny thing is that, their parents whom they run to, are NOT wealthy, perhaps just a little comfortable at most. It beats me that the parents rather than admonishing the run-away brides to go back to their matrimonial homes, reconcile with their husbands, and be patient for things to turn around for the better, would rather take sides with them very swiftly and would sometimes even call the husband on phone, not to meditate but to add salt to injury! I think all women are just wired that way. Does it beat your imagination that even God created them last! He made sure everything was in the garden, else they would complain and run away from the garden to Lucifer! Even with everything in the garden, the woman still yielded to the serpent. Na so them be o!

Not all parents support them. If my sister pack come back we de purse her back. If she no gree, only insult from our last born will make her leave.

Cuttycool:
Stop giving marriage a bad mage. Do not discourage men. You didn't take time to chose the right woman to marry.

From what you said, your wife was not working as well, and you were jobless and broke. You men should always encourage your wife to get something doing, or you help set up a business for her, especially since she may start having babies.

Men should encourage their wives to work?
So a human being with all her senses intact needs encouragement b4 she knows she needs to be doing something?

Rtk5:
Men you need to hussle and if possible avoid marriage. The worst thing that can ever happen to a man is going broke.

Please I am not trying to poison anybody's heart. It is good to fall in love and marry the right partner. I tell you most solemnly, until things get bad, you will never know the real attitude of your partner.

I remember when I lost my job and things became so bad that I planned to kill my self on a certain day, what stopped me from committing suicide was I fell into a deep sleep that I didn't wake up till the next day at around 8am. On waking up i relaized that God did something to me that i couldn't explain till today and the thought of suicide vanished.

Back to my topic, there was a day during my times of trial and hardship that my wife told me she wanted to go and visit her male friend in his house, I stopped her by saying why will a married woman do that and you even have the guts to tell me. It ended in a fight, anytime we have any slight quarrel, she will pack her things and leave to her mum's place and the family always support her actions without knowing from me what happened.

There was a time when our child was just barely few months old, i left the house for an interview, i trecked about 3km to the venue, she left him at home and went to only God knows where, only for her to call me that she has left the house and my son for me, that i should get home before he wakes up from sleep, i couldn't wait for the interview to get to my turn, i begged a random person on the road and he gave me #1,000 that was after i begged more than ten different people with other refusing to answer me not to talk of helping. I ran home and thank God i met him just waking up. I took him back to the interview and a kind lady helped me with him until it got to my turn and i finished and went back home.

In the night at about 7pm while i was preparing to bath him, she entered the house and carried him to bath him, i didn't utter a word and i forgave her.

Guys, you need to see how thin i became during those trials, no single food to eat. I became a shadow of myself, i became so shy of walking in public because of how frustrated i became. I have many experiences but i rest my case here.

The sad reality right now is that we are still married, while the good is that things have improved 10times better than it has ever been but i've placed her where she belongs. The only thing stopping me from divorce is what people will say and my image. Do you know that honestly she hasn't learnt her lessons as she is still a problem to me, always nagging and i don't have peace in my own house.

Right now i'm on the process of divorce and i'm building resistance to whatever people will say.

You are very stupid, you went for an interview in the morning and your wife calls you to tell you that she has left the house and your child is sleeping at home under the care of no one, she comes back home around 7pm and you didn't send her back to where she was coming from... Hmmm.... You only have one life and you can't afford to live it with a bad partner. Divorce her and to hell with people's opinions about you.

AGurlnoname:
Lol... Is it only men that have problems here? Everytime my wife this, my girlfriend that, my sister that. Oga you're a lazy man for you to come online to say such things about your wife. Go and hustle more and stop complaining about your poor wife.

Mod: keep quoting me guys, lol. Check the validity of this story, all is cock and bull story for clickbits, another thread to say vile things about women again. This same handler loves degrading and body shame women but well is a platform, everyone can say shiii.

Lmao.... Nairaland men are so emotional , see quotes abeg

Thunder will fire you wherever you are in Jesus name our Lord.

Amen


Stupid girl

Rtk5:
My brother, you're right on point, the parent are even over struggling. Do you know anytime she packs and go to her parent's place if i don't go to beg them amd her to come back, she would forever remain there?

op please did she always take her child with her anytime she packs to her parents place?

yanabasee2:



I pray never to meet and marry woman like you...


I've seen a man who was earning big, built houses and had good investments.... Married early and was happy.... He had an issue that he was accused of murder.... He was arrested and charged. He spent money to end the case.... He sold all his assets and houses and went broke...


All his friends left him, his wife left him and married his friend.

You can't accuse men who fall as being weak or lazy.

The Op is not lazy, he's a hard working man.

Even. If he is lazy did he force her to marry him. Ashawo way the marriage de vacation. Abi u know no

yanabasee2:



I pray never to meet and marry woman like you...


I've seen a man who was earning big, built houses and had good investments.... Married early and was happy.... He had an issue that he was accused of murder.... He was arrested and charged. He spent money to end the case.... He sold all his assets and houses and went broke...


All his friends left him, his wife left him and married his friend.

You can't accuse men who fall as being weak or lazy.

The Op is not lazy, he's a hard working man.

Even. If he is lazy did he force her to marry him. Ashawo way the marriage de vacation. Abi u no know.

Some women hustle more than men. So ...

chatinent:
Sorry for your experiences, bro.

Please be strong. It isn't always greener in marriages. Meanwhile, one thing I will never support is promiscuity....but a question is: are you working harder?

By harder I mean endeavouring to provide for your family...since you have just a son?

Sometimes, it may be you are working hard but it isn't paying much. What to do? Work smart. Work and freelance on other jobs to get some extra money.

Responsibility are setting in. Don't seek people to manage you. Just be average.

Be strong bro.

I believe you read where he said things have improved 10x better it was before?, meaning he is trying his best by the day.

Palema007:
It is quite pathetic that the reasoning capacity of male posters on this thread so far is as equal as grains of rice. All of you just sleep lie for one direction! Very unreasonable bunch!

Some guy from nowhere post a miserable story of his home and wife, you all could only jump on his post vindicating him while casting stones without even trying to validate his story. Not objective comment except on which was ignored and less liked. Then one is left to wonder what solution has any proffered to save the marriage or lessen Ops claimed burden than dishing derogatory words and insults on the lady who doesn't even know you exist.

Pathetic halfwits everywhere, are these truly our leaders of tomorrow? Bunch of low reasoning bitter lots! What a waste!

I can’t find any solution in your comment.Sometimes it’s good to keep quiet

AGurlnoname:


Abegi, you men on Nairaland always come online to say whatever you like about women. I know things like this happens, the best he can do is to pray and with faith and hardwork he will surely overcome. My problem here is you men have more to say about "women" but forget the roles y'all play in some women life's too.

I just viewed your profile and I saw how wide your mouth is, then I gave up.
Hardly will you see a reasonable girl with such wipe gutter stinky mouth

AGurlnoname:
Lol... Is it only men that have problems here? Everytime my wife this, my girlfriend that, my sister that. Oga you're a lazy man for you to come online to say such things about your wife. Go and hustle more and stop complaining about your poor wife.

Mod: keep quoting me guys, lol. Check the validity of this story, all is cock and bull story for clickbits, another thread to say vile things about women again. This same handler loves degrading and body shame women but well is a platform, everyone can say shiii.

Lmao.... Nairaland men are so emotional , see quotes abeg

u women are the most problem of men

goodheart01:


This is the issue I have with guys. She almost ruined your interview by abandoning your baby and almost turning u to a beggar, and u forgave her the moment she stepped into the house by 7pm?? U didn't ask yourself where she was coming from... Your mind didn't tell u she has lost all respect and love for u to have abandoned a baby she begot for u. If u don't know your wife was fucking another dude all those while. Nothing can make a wife abandon her baby without any reasonable excuse for hours if not dick.

U should have even divorced her the moment u got back on your feet. My advice to u is hurry up with that divorce process and keep her out of your life. She no longer loves u, has tasted another dick and is now in your life to keep pulling u down.

Exactly. He can never love her again. He should divorce her

publicenemy:


You are very stupid, you went for an interview in the morning and your wife calls you to tell you that she has left the house and your child is sleeping at home under the care of no one, she comes back home around 7pm and you didn't send her back to where she was coming from... Hmmm.... You only have one life and you can't afford to live it with a bad partner. Divorce her and to hell with people's opinions about you.

He is more than stupid, foolish and senseless, coming here to tell people not to marry because of one useless woman he can't tame. Nonsense

Woman leave ya house, leave pikin, even get the guts to call and tell you... And the mugu still allow the woman inside hin house... Ha, tie ti ta!!

I'm sure you're one of such who married because you had money and not because you understand you place as a man. Alaye, suffer your suffer in peace Jo.. Don't come and tell people not to marry. Many average men out here in charge of their home you dey here dey cap careless

yanabasee2:



I pray never to meet and marry woman like you...


I've seen a man who was earning big, built houses and had good investments.... Married early and was happy.... He had an issue that he was accused of murder.... He was arrested and charged. He spent money to end the case.... He sold all his assets and houses and went broke...


All his friends left him, his wife left him and married his friend.

You can't accuse men who fall as being weak or lazy.

The Op is not lazy, he's a hard working man.

was he able to get back on his feet again and recover or he went with the case?

lied:
Wicked Lazy man You better hustle and stop starving the innocent woman and the little child.
Nonsense.

Attention seeking hoe

yuping:
Stop using money to chase woman what you will attract is nuisance and oga you did not forgive her you just settle for her like that. Chase that goat away, this is not about you being broke, a woman who abandoned is own baby.

This is the part that annoyed me the most in the post. She knew he went for an interview but left the baby alone only to return by 7pm. I can't keep such woman anymore.

NeroPapas:


He is more than stupid, foolish and senseless, coming here to tell people not to marry because of one useless woman he can't tame. Nonsense

Woman leave ya house, leave pikin, even get the guts to call and tell you... And the mugu still allow the woman inside hin house... Ha, tie ti ta!!

I'm sure you're one of such who married because you had money and not because you understand you place as a man. Alaye, suffer your suffer in peace Jo.. Don't come and tell people not to marry. Many average men out here in charge of their home you dey here dey cap careless

I dey tell you brother

Tobest94:
Anything that makes my wife pack her things out of my house without consent, she’s not coming back again , that’s my own principle

Naso. U be man

Sorry for your sad experience bro.

Do your best, talk with her and pray together. She might change for better.

All the best.


Check my signature...

Rtk5:
Men you need to hussle and if possible avoid marriage. The worst thing that can ever happen to a man is going broke.

Please I am not trying to poison anybody's heart. It is good to fall in love and marry the right partner. I tell you most solemnly, until things get bad, you will never know the real attitude of your partner.

I remember when I lost my job and things became so bad that I planned to kill my self on a certain day, what stopped me from committing suicide was I fell into a deep sleep that I didn't wake up till the next day at around 8am. On waking up i relaized that God did something to me that i couldn't explain till today and the thought of suicide vanished.

Back to my topic, there was a day during my times of trial and hardship that my wife told me she wanted to go and visit her male friend in his house, I stopped her by saying why will a married woman do that and you even have the guts to tell me. It ended in a fight, anytime we have any slight quarrel, she will pack her things and leave to her mum's place and the family always support her actions without knowing from me what happened.

There was a time when our child was just barely few months old, i left the house for an interview, i trecked about 3km to the venue, she left him at home and went to only God knows where, only for her to call me that she has left the house and my son for me, that i should get home before he wakes up from sleep, i couldn't wait for the interview to get to my turn, i begged a random person on the road and he gave me #1,000 that was after i begged more than ten different people with other refusing to answer me not to talk of helping. I ran home and thank God i met him just waking up. I took him back to the interview and a kind lady helped me with him until it got to my turn and i finished and went back home.

In the night at about 7pm while i was preparing to bath him, she entered the house and carried him to bath him, i didn't utter a word and i forgave her.

Guys, you need to see how thin i became during those trials, no single food to eat. I became a shadow of myself, i became so shy of walking in public because of how frustrated i became. I have many experiences but i rest my case here.

The sad reality right now is that we are still married, while the good is that things have improved 10times better than it has ever been but i've placed her where she belongs. The only thing stopping me from divorce is what people will say and my image. Do you know that honestly she hasn't learnt her lessons as she is still a problem to me, always nagging and i don't have peace in my own house.

Right now i'm on the process of divorce and i'm building resistance to whatever people will say.

Reading this i was just remembering my dad..but he is no more and na mama dey enjoy everything now..you are a good man and your kind is rare meaning u really loved her if me and my sibling did not eat my dad wont eat..guess you attracted her with gifts and married her with the first few change that entered your hand.

Rtk5:
Men you need to hussle and if possible avoid marriage. The worst thing that can ever happen to a man is going broke.

Please I am not trying to poison anybody's heart. It is good to fall in love and marry the right partner. I tell you most solemnly, until things get bad, you will never know the real attitude of your partner.

I remember when I lost my job and things became so bad that I planned to kill my self on a certain day, what stopped me from committing suicide was I fell into a deep sleep that I didn't wake up till the next day at around 8am. On waking up i relaized that God did something to me that i couldn't explain till today and the thought of suicide vanished.

Back to my topic, there was a day during my times of trial and hardship that my wife told me she wanted to go and visit her male friend in his house, I stopped her by saying why will a married woman do that and you even have the guts to tell me. It ended in a fight, anytime we have any slight quarrel, she will pack her things and leave to her mum's place and the family always support her actions without knowing from me what happened.

There was a time when our child was just barely few months old, i left the house for an interview, i trecked about 3km to the venue, she left him at home and went to only God knows where, only for her to call me that she has left the house and my son for me, that i should get home before he wakes up from sleep, i couldn't wait for the interview to get to my turn, i begged a random person on the road and he gave me #1,000 that was after i begged more than ten different people with other refusing to answer me not to talk of helping. I ran home and thank God i met him just waking up. I took him back to the interview and a kind lady helped me with him until it got to my turn and i finished and went back home.

In the night at about 7pm while i was preparing to bath him, she entered the house and carried him to bath him, i didn't utter a word and i forgave her.

Guys, you need to see how thin i became during those trials, no single food to eat. I became a shadow of myself, i became so shy of walking in public because of how frustrated i became. I have many experiences but i rest my case here.

The sad reality right now is that we are still married, while the good is that things have improved 10times better than it has ever been but i've placed her where she belongs. The only thing stopping me from divorce is what people will say and my image. Do you know that honestly she hasn't learnt her lessons as she is still a problem to me, always nagging and i don't have peace in my own house.

Right now i'm on the process of divorce and i'm building resistance to whatever people will say.

When I say marriage is overrated and a sham, they'll say it's waywardness.

Oga, follow your heart. But you have to give your wife a taste of her own medicine, if not more.

Please, take good care of that baby.

God be with you.

Op, sorry for all the pain. Once it got to that bridge of suicide, then I can only imagine.

But the fact is, in relationships, most times you get what you give. We only heard Mr op's side; what of madam's? I'm not saying what she did to him is right, but it could result from a bitter pill given to her by op in the past, which has grown to that extent. Op, maybe when things were rosy, there are treatments you meted on her that are inappropriate. The axe forgets, but the tree never does. That woman is somebody's daughter. She's a human being like you. She has brothers and sisters who wish her well, friends too. Treat her unpalatably and their karma visit.

The mistake most of do is giving what we can't take in a relationship. You will get a dose of your medicine, that's for sure

Palema007:
Now I know there is no hope for you. So divorce is the solution? I hope he wouldn't have anything to do with any woman again too.

You know what? Just get lost already! I've wasted enough mentions on you already and your senseless summations has failed to convince me otherwise.

Oga,yes,sometimes, divorce is the solution so we don't hear husband/wife stabs d other to death one day.
Dated 2 girls after each other while in school.
The first was calm,nice,never had a cause to say sorry to me.
2 second was a preacher of war,always quarrelling.
At my work place I have 2 female colleagues I'm close to.
Knew d 1st one for d past 11yrs,evenb4 we started working 2geda.She's calm,collected with no wahala.
The 2nd is a warrior half of the times,and nice the other half but I can imagine what will be happening at her home.Have witnessed 2 male colleagues threaten to beat her up cos of her brash behaviour. I'm talking of medical doctors here.
SO YOU HAVE TO ADMIT, SOME PPL ARE PLAIN TOXIC AND POORLY MANNERED while others are normal ppl.As simple as that.Of course it applies to males too.
That some1 should open his eyes and continue staying in a relationship/marriage with a toxic and poorly brought up partner should be at his benevolence or convenience.
SIMPLE!

It is trite and axiomatic to know that the true nature of women is steeped in fickleness and loyalty is not a feminine strong suite! Women across history have repeatedly proven that they are only loyal to circumstances perceived favorable to them! But what do you know, it is the way of the world and in reality, a woman’s!
The foundation of love is rooted in self appreciation and satisfaction with ones correlating reality! Love begins the moment we show unconditional and unqualified love to ourselves, as without loving the self, it is impossible to generate love for others! Not loving yourself enough to preserve your sanity and peace while attempting simultaneously to unconditionally love another is tomfoolery and akin to a futile attempt at giving what you don’t have, for how can you love another so completely and absolutely when you starve yourself of love!
Loving yourself is understanding that marriage was a product of your volition and consent and should never become an albatross as that deviates from the original intention of consummating the matrimony! It is disservice to yourself to confine yourself to a lifetime of tolerance and endurance even when it exceeds your threshold all because you are trying to project the smoke screen of a perfect marriage! Love should not be a tool for hijacking or kidnapping the peace and happiness of another nor yourself and neither should marriage be a ransom! You are playing a dual role of the prisoner and the jailer all to your own disadvantage! The finality of death should make you appreciate the fact that you only get a single chance at living right!

There is only one constant and that is FORWARD! Learn to love yourself enough to move forward, learn to be selfish for the right reasons for only then can it be said that you have loved, for without the love of the self every other attempt at love is futile and a waste of time, love yourself enough to conquer your world, the world is truly your stage, own it! Act it!

lied:
Wicked Lazy man
You better hustle and stop starving the innocent woman and the little child.

Nonsense.

Lol. How Dem de take hustle abeg. With laptop or with gun. Idiot!!

Ekejoestar:


With all these Epistles am reading here about what men are facing in marriages, is it not better that I go the baby Mama way and save myself the stress

My fear on baby mama issue is that since the mother has custody of the child during the formative years, the child will naturally tilt towards the mother when grown.
If you have issues with the mother,she can easily Poison the child's mind and the child will turn against you.

Also, loneliness will set in at some point.Imagine the grown child in his/her own home,the mother in her own home,you too in your own home...no family around you In old age.

So many fears,how can it be managed because marriage is scaring the shii outta me!!

Viking07:
The story is obviously fake. Clickbait to generate traffic. Trust Nairalanders to react till eternity.

Oga Viking why you go awol for that Alabi thread na? Anyway, I won't blame you, that thread is not what it used to be.