| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by dapotemi: 3:18pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:19pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
 Pacesetter2021:
Most girls are very very protective of their father. I have seen your situation play out before.
Yes, you would have helped her get use to her room way before now.
If you are hoping she will grow up and start using that room, I am sorry it won't happen. Even when she is 7.
What I will advise is that during bed time, take her to her room, do what ever routine, story telling, or song singing or cartoon watching then lay with her and tell her to sleep. Act like you are sleeping with her. When she sleep, get up and leave. If she wake up and cry again, take her back to the room, lie with her till she sleeps again.
Continue till she forgets what it's like to sleep on your bed. This may take up to a year but better now than later cos the more you delay the harder it will be.
Please she should not mistakenly see you both doing that pls before she will climb her class mate in school. Abeg, for the sake of her innocent class mates. Thanks |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by revcompaty(m): 3:19pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
daddytime:
Hmmm...this is a very very tricky one.
1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?
Yes, this is where you guys missed it. She should have been introduced to her room by age 3 at the latest.
2. Is it too late to force her to her room?
Never, it can't be too late. It's time to let her know who's in charge and the boss.
Kids are like "puppies or dogs". They play on your intelligence and patience to an elasticity and should you fall for the " blink-first" game, you'd remain their puppy and always at their mercy.
3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?
Like "NIKE", just do it.
Introduce her to her room, make her understand she's a big girl now and needs to act like one. The best person to implement this should be mummy. The trick should be to spend time with her gisting and telling her stories until she falls asleep. She'd rebel for a while but after a while she'd eventually get used to it.
4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.
She shouldn't be encouraged or given any reason to ask such " adult" questions. However, in a case where you both get careless and she stumbles in on you, if you weren't caught in your "birthday suites" just tell her you and mummy were praying.
5. Is her jealousy normal?
Isn't she a girl? Ask her mummy 
Patronize my signature below.. |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by Ishitinyourlife: 3:20pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Since she has occupied your room,use her room whenever you want to get physical,wait till she's sound asleep and sneak to her room to make love , that's a minor inconvenience for the sake of your daughter |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by OneCandleAway(f): 3:20pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
FERNANDEZISBACK:
Let her watch and observe..she is an innocent kid who has no idea whatsoever what you guys are doing..
Let her be comfortable around you guys when intimate... nothing wrong with it... Bad idea. The child will remember if she sees it. This incident has happened severally and the kids were under 4 and remembered to the extent that they can describe it to others |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:21pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
 ImaIma1:
That is the first rule of sleep with kids. Never allow them sleep on the same bed from when they are babies. Never!
I learnt this and my babies go from the hospital to their own beds. I would take the pain to stand up, pick them up and breastfeed. Because getting them to stop sleeping in your bed is one of the hardest things to do.
Just gradually get her to sleep in her bed. It's not easy to start sleeping alone when you have been sleeping with people from birth. |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by Ishitinyourlife: 3:21pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
FERNANDEZISBACK:
Let her watch and observe..she is an innocent kid who has no idea whatsoever what you guys are doing..
Let her be comfortable around you guys when intimate... nothing wrong with it... Is either goure just naturally unintelligent and slow or you're just being sarcastic |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:22pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Exactly, kids mimic everything, she will use other children to practice. DonroxyII:
This seems like a Bad Idea. You don't want your kids to be in the creche and be reported to be sleeping on other people's kids because they practice what they see  |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by neighbourhud: 3:22pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
daddytime:
Hmmm...this is a very very tricky one.
1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?
Yes, this is where you guys missed it. She should have been introduced to her room by age 3 at the latest.
2. Is it too late to force her to her room?
Never, it can't be too late. It's time to let her know who's in charge and the boss.
Kids are like "puppies or dogs". They play on your intelligence and patience to an elasticity and should you fall for the " blink-first" game, you'd remain their puppy and always at their mercy.
3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?
Like "NIKE", just do it.
Introduce her to her room, make her understand she's a big girl now and needs to act like one. The best person to implement this should be mummy. The trick should be to spend time with her gisting and telling her stories until she falls asleep. She'd rebel for a while but after a while she'd eventually get used to it.
4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.
She shouldn't be encouraged or given any reason to ask such " adult" questions. However, in a case where you both get careless and she stumbles in on you, if you weren't caught in your "birthday suites" just tell her you and mummy were praying.
5. Is her jealousy normal?
Isn't she a girl? Ask her mummy
Patronize my signature below.. On point! Op...here is what u are looking for |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by BuddhaPalm(m): 3:22pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
I thought you were the man of the house?
Leave her in her room tonight let's see if she'll die.
If she "let's hell lose" at night, you spank her. You are the only person allowed to "let hell lose".
This is one of those times you need to IMPOSE YOUR WILL, as the dominant force in the house. |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by AmuRubber(m): 3:22pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Are there people who still have sex in this Buhari's government, despite the critical conditions of the various sectors of the economy? Now I believe Nigerians never learn. 2 Shares 
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| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by ItsmeF: 3:23pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
GenderMix:
Dear Esteemed Nairalanders of extreme wisdom, I have a 4+ year old daughter who is very curious and sleeps on the same bed with me and wife. Some days ago she almost caught me and wife having sex, so in the morning she asked my wife what I was doing to her…lol. Most times I hug and kiss my wife in front of her and do same to her (in her case, a peck and she reciprocates back). This is our normal lives. Sometimes, when I hug my wife before her, she gets jealous..lol
I think we made a mistake in not allowing her get used to her room from day one. We had tried to make her see reasons why she can’t continue to sleep on same bed with us but it’s all falling on deaf ears. At a point, we forced her to her room and when she woke up around 2am, all hell was let loose, I felt sympathy and told my wife to allow her into our room.
We can’t continue this way, so I need your advice (especially married couples with kids)
1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?
2. Is it too late to force her to her room?
3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?
4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.
5. Is her jealousy normal?
Thank you
We had similar situation with our 2 kids, it's normal, she will grow up when it's time. But for now, use the other room whenever you and wifey want to make love and make sure you lock the room while in action because she can surprise you guys���. My daughter once caught us live and direct oh, we thought we locked our door but thank God it was about to rain so everywhere was very dark, so we quickly cover ourselves with blanket, pull her towards us and hugged her so she won't see more damages���. I had to hold her in that position for hubby to quickly dress up, then I now found a way out. Mistake was from day 1, let your children sleep in their room because its stressful for parents we turn to allow them have their way. |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:24pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
exactly, I remember things, from when i was a 3-year-old and some even as a baby, especially any dangerous event. ozonechrome:
Please don't ever do this.
Even at 1year old. They can remember stuffs. |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by Ishitinyourlife: 3:24pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Hilariousfacto:
Dey there dey form official best dad....I made this kind of mistake with my 3yrs old son when he was just about one year, the rate at which he caught up with everything really amazed me....I had to enforce him sleeping in separate room immediately.... Same with my last baby girl, she's also now used to sleeping separately....all these didn't come easily, nah with thorough beating self...you will be glad you did later.... I ain't gat no time for shit...I can't turn my kids to nympho at an early age all in the name of best dad....I've seen kids at under age three trying to engage in sex....in fact a tenant had to move out of our house cos her girl child was already on the high at age three....bros.....use force bfr things go out of your control Mister if you have to use force to solve small problems like this then perhaps you became a dad too young. You don't have to beat a child to enforce basic rules,not everything is beating and hitting kids like a damn punching bag 1 Like |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by alizma: 3:25pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
GenderMix:
Dear Esteemed Nairalanders of extreme wisdom, I have a 4+ year old daughter who is very curious and sleeps on the same bed with me and wife. Some days ago she almost caught me and wife having sex, so in the morning she asked my wife what I was doing to her…lol. Most times I hug and kiss my wife in front of her and do same to her (in her case, a peck and she reciprocates back). This is our normal lives. Sometimes, when I hug my wife before her, she gets jealous..lol
I think we made a mistake in not allowing her get used to her room from day one. We had tried to make her see reasons why she can’t continue to sleep on same bed with us but it’s all falling on deaf ears. At a point, we forced her to her room and when she woke up around 2am, all hell was let loose, I felt sympathy and told my wife to allow her into our room.
We can’t continue this way, so I need your advice (especially married couples with kids)
1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?
2. Is it too late to force her to her room?
3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?
4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.
5. Is her jealousy normal?
Thank you
Let me start from the last question 5. Is her jealousy normal? yes, of a female child 4. If she ask what should you tell her? Make sure she doesn't need to see you people talk more of asking, that is from this night, she start sleeping in her room. 3 how do you make her get use to her room? From this night, take her to her room when ever she fall asleep, buy some toys and keep in her room, if possible paint the room with different colors of her choice, pit poster of her favorite child actors and actresses on the wall. However once in a while she will disturb when she wakes up. If that happens don't bring her to your room, let her favourite person between you and your wife stay with her on her bed, in her room until she fall asleep again then the person leaves. 2 is it too late to force her to her room, there is no one forcing the other, you are just doing the right thing and it is never too late to do the right thing. 1 did we make mistake let her sleep on the same bed with us considering her age? No but you will be making mistake if you allow her to continue to sleep on the same bed with you after you have knowledge of her curiosity. Finally, let me tell you, that child don catch una since, my child is 4+ too but even before she turned 4+, I noticed one day that my child was already awake but intentionally closed her eyes trying to know what we were doing, that was the last day she slept in our room on daily basis. She only sleeps in our room this days when I am very sure no plan for night match between Egyptian and Nigerian team. I hope you Gerrit? If you don't Gerrit forget it. 1 Like |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:26pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
It's actually good advice even for 2 years old, because they can keep memories, and God help us if they keep the wrong memory and want to try it out. FERNANDEZISBACK:
At 4yrs  |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:28pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Mummy and daddy were praying. Otiv:
God bless your wisdom. I don't think there would be a better response than this |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by moneyissweet(m): 3:28pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Oga go to your room and allow your little girl to sleep in one room with your wife,when you want to have sex with your wife you call her to your room and you will fck her as many times as you want.
When you are done she will return back to her own room and have a deep sleep. 
|
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by polyte: 3:30pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Please can you arrest her with police?
There's nothing you people don't even bring here these days...O ga o |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:33pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Does not invalidate their own experiences, We don't have to do things the same way, when you call someone an ajebuter, you are already closing the ability to reason differently or you are boxing yourself already. aribisala0:
Mr Ajebutter
Her own room? Is that the Nigerian reality?
Many urban Nigerian families have one room as their entire dwelling and sometimes even two families in one room
Sometimes I see some families in such circumstances and wonder when and where they DO IT |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by gadgethead: 3:33pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
GenderMix:
Dear Esteemed Nairalanders of extreme wisdom, I have a 4+ year old daughter who is very curious and sleeps on the same bed with me and wife. Some days ago she almost caught me and wife having sex, so in the morning she asked my wife what I was doing to her…lol. Most times I hug and kiss my wife in front of her and do same to her (in her case, a peck and she reciprocates back). This is our normal lives. Sometimes, when I hug my wife before her, she gets jealous..lol
I think we made a mistake in not allowing her get used to her room from day one. We had tried to make her see reasons why she can’t continue to sleep on same bed with us but it’s all falling on deaf ears. At a point, we forced her to her room and when she woke up around 2am, all hell was let loose, I felt sympathy and told my wife to allow her into our room.
We can’t continue this way, so I need your advice (especially married couples with kids)
1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?
2. Is it too late to force her to her room?
3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?
4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.
5. Is her jealousy normal?
Thank you
Maybe you guys should use your daughter's room, when she is sound asleep, then go join her in your bedroom when you're done |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by CSTRR: 3:35pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
lucro:
You are very brave.
Please a question...
With the beating, aren't you scared your kids may become afraid of you and in the process get disconnected into adulthood?
I love my dad dearly but he was not one to spare the rod. Overtime we got closer to our mum (our defender of the Universe back then) while our relationship with our dad became strained.
For almost two years I did not inflict any form of 'corporal punishment' on my 2 year old, but I noticed that he now exhibits some traits that require correction. I, very recently, started 'spanking' the dude, but noticed that he gets 'uncomfortable' around me whenever I am 'not happy' with him. I am a bit uncomfortable with this.
Doe that happen in your case, and how do you deal with it? I guess this makes it three questions.
Thanks. That is the burden of fatherhood. You sacrifice yourself for the greater good. Nobody else will do it. 1 Like |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:35pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
do you have to insult? This is why we are in a cage, not willing to change. ALLNIGERIANSMAD:
imagine how 21st century parent they train child in Africa oh,
Do exactly how your parents did to you till you grow, and stop asking stupid question |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by ThatFairGuy1: 3:36pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
I don't think it's ideal to leave kid at that tender age sleep the hell alone. What if unexpected happens? How would you know  I don't take chances It's better u go to the other room to do your thing when nature calls or you make another beddings for her IN THAT SAME ROOM. Afterall you should Should turn the light off while you're wrestling I don't think u do before. |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by CSTRR: 3:37pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
HonestFriend:
Try knacking at noon na.. My neighbor has 4kids in one room.. Na afternoon the man dey hammer him wife wen the kids don go school.
Haha So you know when they are having sex. |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:37pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
luckydion:
you don't pamper a child up to that effect else you succeeded in ruining her future
relocate her to children's room.
no mater the age, don't make love in their presence, those in tender age may not be able to ask like yours did or may be afraid or don't care to ask but the scene creates image in them, definitely, they will act according to it.... then, you might not trace the source.
there was a man in Bosso, opposite FUT Minna Niger State then... living in one room with his wife and many children.... You know what the man his Wife sleep on bed while the children on the floor. according his age daughter who was pregnant the same time her mother took-in said she had sex with her father's colleague who visited in the morning having watch her parents doing it all the night time. |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:38pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Forumobserver12:
Please don't even try that in the presence of your own 4yrs old child, children of nowadays learn fast....did you read about the question she asked the parents ?
Do you realize that children of about 2years old now knows the difference between a toy phone and real phones? |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by Nobody: 3:38pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Stevenbright:
She and her mum should sleep in her room. When you both need to be intimate, your wife will come to your room at night when the little child is fast asleep! Good idea. Eventually the wife can slowly move out and the girl can get used to having her room 1 Like |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by aribisala0(m): 3:39pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
SeriouslySense:
Does not invalidate their own experiences, We don't have to do things the same way, when you call someone an ajebuter, you are already closing the ability to reason differently or you are boxing yourself already.
You need to loosen up and stop taking yoursef so seriously Ajebutter was a joke. If the joke was lost on you sorry . \let us leave that \the reality is very few Nigerian children have a room of their own . Fewer than 1 in 1000 Nigerian children have any such experience of having a bedroom. as to make it sound un-Nigerian. If you do not know this you do not know Nigeria |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by Nobody: 3:40pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
ThatFairGuy1:
I don't think it's ideal to leave kid at that tender age sleep the hell alone.
What if unexpected happens?
How would you know
I don't take chances
It's better u go to the other room to do your thing when nature calls or you make another beddings for her IN THAT SAME ROOM.
Afterall you should Should turn the light off while you're wrestling
I don't think u do before. I was sleeping alone in my own room by age 2. And yes, back then , safety was an issue |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by writeprof(m): 3:43pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
GenderMix:
Dear Esteemed Nairalanders of extreme wisdom, I have a 4+ year old daughter who is very curious and sleeps on the same bed with me and wife. Some days ago she almost caught me and wife having sex, so in the morning she asked my wife what I was doing to her…lol. Most times I hug and kiss my wife in front of her and do same to her (in her case, a peck and she reciprocates back). This is our normal lives. Sometimes, when I hug my wife before her, she gets jealous..lol
I think we made a mistake in not allowing her get used to her room from day one. We had tried to make her see reasons why she can’t continue to sleep on same bed with us but it’s all falling on deaf ears. At a point, we forced her to her room and when she woke up around 2am, all hell was let loose, I felt sympathy and told my wife to allow her into our room.
We can’t continue this way, so I need your advice (especially married couples with kids)
1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?
2. Is it too late to force her to her room?
3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?
4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.
5. Is her jealousy normal?
Thank you
Think seriously of getting a sibling for her urgently. 1 Like |
| Re: My Daughter Of 4+ Years Would Not Allow Me And Wife Have Sex At Night by SeriouslySense(m): 3:45pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
You are right on that, some are lucky to have their room. In the case of a one-room family, they can make a curtain to separate the parents from the children or they can have sex when the child is not around. I don't mean to be serious, the early years of children are a serious matter. children will practice what they see, and if they saw their parents doing it, if they are feeling lonely or stressed or with other kids, they may try it to understand what it does. aribisala0:
You need to loosen up and stop taking yoursef so seriously
Ajebutter was a joke. If the joke was lost on you sorry . \let us leave that
\the reality is very few Nigerian children have a room of their own . Fewer than 1 in 1000 Nigerian children have any such experience of having a bedroom. as to make it sound un-Nigerian. If you do not know this you do not know Nigeria |
