So I was talking with my mum the other day and she she began to lament abount my aunties predicaments.
3 of them are educated and over 40, yet unmarried
The first lives in asaba, she used to be extremely beautiful (and still is for guys who may not be interested in wifing young, energetic beautiful women with fresh blood) and uncouth.
She used to attract loads of admirers and guys were trooping in to ask for her hands in marriage when she was in her 20s. She not only turned them down but made mockery of the legit hussling guys at the time, she mocked their financial status and embarrassed those who persisted.
Most of the men approaching her at the time are happily married and doing well for themselves now but my aunty is still visiting one prayer house to another seeking the hands of God in her life. I was told she resorted to online dating after men were no longer showing interest as usual and lost huge sums of money in a romance scam.

The latter is the exact opposite of the former in terms of looks and character.
This one was and is still very ugly but with good character. She had a suitor who was ready to marry her in her 20s, the man happened to be in his late 50s.
She seeked advice from her sisters and friends, they all agreed that this well to do man was too old for their young, albeit ugly sister. They tricked her into believing that she would find young, rich, educated suitors who would seek her hands in marriage in no distant time. They raised the bar so high that aunty suddenly forgot she was a female version of SHREK(ogre), she developed the Prince charming fanstasy and chased this educated, rich old man away. Ever since then, she has been falling for guys who only want to swim, eat her money and run away. She's currently indepted from borrowing a substantial sum of money for a lover to process his visas in a premise that he would marry her and move her abroad once he's slightly settled. This one is frustrated like kilode, I was told she is now dating a soldier and she pays his rents and bills, does domestic chores for him and nigga still cheats under her nose.

The last one had a boyfriend in university days who graduated and got a good job, he proposed to her and she turned him down simply because she wanted to finish her studies first, she is the independent woman wannebe and hoped to be a career woman.
Baba jejelly went to marry his first wife and got some children.
My aunt graduated, got a job and started doing well but no husband in her 30s. Baba came back and asked her to marry him again but she said she can't be a second wife to dangote let alone her EX. Baba went and married a second wife

So it happened that my aunt clocked 45, and she still hadn't found her dream man and bone of her ribs.
Then Baba came back the third time, this time my aunt shamefully agreed to be third wife. Thank heaven's she now has children of her own.

My mum used to tell me that when she got married in her early 20s in the university, her friends and sisters were mocking her that she was going into marriage too early and she should have stayed back to enjoy her life as a spinster. Today shes happily married with grandchildren, while some of those who mocked her then are living miserable as old spinsters, second or third wife's or hooking up small boys young enough to be their kids in town.

So I told my mum squarely that I'm not sympathetic to their travails and that they deserve every bit of it.
What are your thoughts about women unmarried in their 30s?

Moral of the story: make hay while the sun shines.

Holly Gram real matters on top real MATTERZ



WTF MAN

karkinase:
Moral of the story: make hay while the sun shines.

moral: don't pressure people into being miserable...

Marriage is mostly a do or die affair in third world countries...

If you wanna get married, go so...

If you don't want to get married... Then live your life as you please...

Why ain't men being pressured too?

Personally, I can't get married... especially not to a Nigerian man...

I have one like that too,very desperate and ready to anything to please a man...But the men coming her are use and dump....

I never pity such women

Datboredberry:
moral: don't pressure people into being miserable...

Marriage is mostly a do or die affair in third world countries...

Even in first world countries, marriage is still the same. Older single women still desperately looking for life partners till they die alone or end up with the wrong man. The problem is the same worldwide.

Marriage ain't by force son..it's their choice to stay single or get married and if they are above 30 looking for a man that's none of your business..

Op,i stan with you fully

Any banny that rejected legit hustling suitors during her prime simply because they weren't rich enough ought to face the consequences when meno-stop starts to pay her visitation

Datboredberry:
If you wanna get married, go so...

If you don't want to get married... Then live your life as you please...

Why ain't men being pressured too?

Personally, I can't get married... especially not to a Nigerian man...

Because of two reasons.
1. Time isn't really a hindering factor for us men, financial stability is our hindering factor.
2. When it comes to marriage, men don't really gain much, except he wants to have kids... A man can go unmarried all his life and it wouldn't bother him, because the happiness of most men increases over the years.

Datboredberry:
If you wanna get married, go so...

If you don't want to get married... Then live your life as you please...

Why ain't men being pressured too?

Personally, I can't get married... especially not to a Nigerian man...

Men go through more pressures in life than you women.
So much so that a mans marriageable value is now being dictated by how deep his pockets are.
Women don't even need to be doing well to get suitors.
A man has to be doing averagely at least to marry a woman because he has not just his immediate family to care for but his in-laws and parents.
Do you know how much it costs to perform some marriage rites? If that isn't pressure then what is it?

FERNANDEZISBACK:
Marriage ain't by force son..it's their choice to stay single or get married and if they are above 30 looking for a man that's none of your business..

I said clearly in my post that I'm not sympathetic to their cause, because I don't care about their miseries because its non of my business.
Now I'm sure you agree with me that they do not deserve any pity too.
If u don't, that's your business, mind it too

Mystiquefia:


I said clearly in my post that I'm not sympathetic to their cause, because I don't care about their miseries because its non of my business.
Now I'm sure you agree with me that they do not deserve any pity too.
If u don't, that's your business, mind it too

You don't care about their miseries then don't bother talking about it..
Confusing yourself son..it's none of your business but you writing an article to address an issue that you ain't sympathetic with..
Common..

FERNANDEZISBACK:

You don't care about their miseries then don't bother talking about it..
Confusing yourself son..it's none of your business but you writing an article to address an issue that you ain't sympathetic with..
Common..

Oh, I see where your problem lies
I hit a nerve there
This was supposed to be a panacea to your problem.
If it increases your headache the more, then have it cut off

Sonnobax15:

Op,i stan with you fully

Any banny that rejected legit hustling suitors during her prime simply because they weren't rich enough ought to face the consequences when meno-stop starts to pay her visitation

Correct man

Mystiquefia:


Oh, I see where your problem lies
I hit a nerve there
This was supposed to be a panacea to your problem.
If it increases your headache the more, then have it cut off

That ain't my problems son..I was only addressing your hypocrisy..
You are free to say whatever you so wish..I have proven my point already..

Datboredberry:
moral: don't pressure people into being miserable...

Marriage is mostly a do or die affair in third world countries...

I think you are 30+ with this comment

If you wanna get married, go so...

If you don't want to get married... Then live your life as you please...

Why ain't men being pressured too?

Personally, I can't get married... especially not to a Nigerian man...



I love your opinion but stick to it for life and see the outcome of your choice. Life is all about choice but am gonna get married to a beautiful figure 8 , can read and write and well mannered Nigeria woman and a white American woman with same qualities . I don’t believe in cert. Mind you am an Electrical Engr.

Life is all about choice, life is short and there is too much to learn. life is no life without the knowledge of learning from experience of people and events to build our happiness and future.



Bleep whatever you think about me, there is no competition in DESTINY.

This thread seem like a misogynist thread but you've made excellent points.

I think our sisters need to understand this before it's too late.


karlebolu

Datboredberry:
If you wanna get married, go so...

If you don't want to get married... Then live your life as you please...

Why ain't men being pressured too?

Personally, I can't get married... especially not to a Nigerian man...

And what's your worth to a sane man

FERNANDEZISBACK:

That ain't my problems son..I was only addressing your hypocrisy..
You are free to say whatever you so wish..I have proven my point already..

mama don run..
Wannabe,Old,deluded,frustrated feminist..
Don't quote me for christ sake.

Nyascobar1414:


mama don run..
Wannabe,Old,deluded,frustrated feminist..
Don't quote me for christ sake.

Ok

They are alot them here too.. 30+ girls are all looking for a man that will marry them.. op it is not only your sister...

Polynek:
This is currently happening to my cousin, she is extremely beautiful, alot of guys and men of different categories use to come to our house seeking for her hand in marriage bcox she is educated and religious too, but her mom and she herself never give any of Dem a listening ear,
Now she is in her early 40's and still single.
And pple are mocking her even physically.
Personally I don't pity her at all, bcox I know how it pains as guy to b turned down even wen u hv a genuine intention 4 a girl.

Interesting thing is they think they're still their former stunning self when they clock 30s and still wallow in the delusions of their unrealistic cut-off marks, till they clock 40, then they ditch those standards and are suddenly willing to mingle. Forgetting that those guys they turned down now have a wide variety of women to chose from

Make them they wait for their own standard till they reach 89

Mystiquefia:


Interesting thing is they think they're still their former stunning self when they clock 30s and still wallow in the delusions of their unrealistic cut-off marks, till they clock 40, then they ditch those standards and are suddenly willing to mingle. Forgetting that those guys they turned down now have a wide variety of women to chose from

You hv said it all bro.
Cut-off marks bro u don off me

Polynek:
This is currently happening to my cousin, she is extremely beautiful, alot of guys and men of different categories use to come to our house seeking for her hand in marriage bcox she is educated and religious too, but her mom and she herself never give any of Dem a listening ear,
Now she is in her early 40's and still single.
And pple are mocking her even physically.
Personally I don't pity her at all, bcox I know how it pains as guy to b turned down even wen u hv a genuine intention 4 a girl.

Lol,
There used to be an old wealthy woman in my area where I grew up, she had just one daughter.
I was told she was very stunning as a young girl and that she'd usually turn down the advances of young guys (there was no yahoo then so ofcourse most young guys then were doing averagely well or broke) and was always at the beck and call of wealthy politicians and chiefs.
It happened that she got pregnant for one of those politicians and she said she can't give birth to a child for an old politician with several wives, even though he begged her to keep the child with so many promises. so she aborted the pregnancy(she suddenly wants to wed a young man).
It happened that after the incident she hoped from one rich man to another and amassed so much wealth for herself. She later decided to get married to a young boy after which children weren't forth coming because of the abortion she had for the politician.
Na there e dawn on her say water done pass garri, she had to go abort a baby girl who happened to be my classmate in primary school. Whenever the girl asks about her dad she will tell her he's dead, because the young boy couldn't take it any longer and disappeared.