₦airaland Forum

donmik:
What is really your advice for her now?

Advise? Is it your understanding that the Gospel aka God's New Covenant Law and Truth in the Kingdom of God is meant as a sort of advice?

BluntTheApostle:
Are you by any chance confusing sexual urge with sexual desire

Sexual lust - lust in one's heart after another one is not married to - is what Jesus Christ deemed to be adultery - Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28

fenoll05:
Bros, this one wey you write like this ehn, I no believe am and I no gree. Temptations are normal in the life of every individual. Desires are natural things created by God Himself. The sin is in giving life to those desires or falling to those temptations. Don't make the lady feel she has sinned by the mere reason of feeling the desire to be with s man. Mbok, talk the one wey God talk abeg.

So, you believe then that when Jesus Christ said in Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 that the sin of Adultery is committed when one lusts in one's heart after a woman, Jesus Christ in fact lied?

Zhirinovsky:
Always pray fervently at midnight against all forms and spirit of lust

Stop deceiving yourself!

kepstone:
Lol.. some of us have stayed 3+ decades without sex... U won't die... Self control puts you in control

3+ decades Liar! Like you're not human or you don't have your desires, no one on nairaland will ever understand the circumstances of you staying celibate for more than 30 years! Which begs the question, are you sexually healthy? Of course not!

Achorise:
1. If so everyone is a sinner then ,una go the write rubbish.

2. There’s a difference between temptation and sin,you can be tempted,and not sin.Jesus was tempted to the point that he cried and wished he didn’t want to die,Apostle Paul said if you can’t control your passion then marry,There must be passion in your flesh that will burn but self control will come to play which is the gift of the spirit.

3. The bible said when lust is fully mature it gives birth to sin,sin to death.Jesus made that statement to prove to man that man needs help and needs to come the end of himself and thereby cry out for a saviour who is Jesus.

1. Wrong! Not everyone is a sinner. There are in fact those who have, through continuous obedience of God's Law and Truth, Jesus Christ, been set free from bondage to sin and been transformed into Sons of God aka holy/perfect vessels fit for God's own Spirit to live in.

2. The issue raised was not about temptation but of sin itself. According to Jesus Christ, the one who is God's very own Law and Truth, you commit the sin of adultery when you sexually lust after another(one you are not one with) - Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28. So either you believe Jesus Christ or you don't.

3. Jesus Christ is the one who God Himself sent to give men His TRUTH and that Truth is that sexual lust is sin. Do you believe God's Truth or do you believe the musings of a man called Paul...you decide who your savior is..

Optimistic4life:
I'm trying hard to live a life free from sin and sexual immorality and I am doing pretty well but of recent, my hormones/body have been raging and I am finding it difficult to cope.

It's 18months I have been separated and there is no getting back together.

Were you ever in my situation, how did you overcome without involving in sex/masturbation?

I just need some words of encouragement.

Its really not easy and it has become some sort of distraction.

The reason I do not want to have a male friend is because of my fear for God.

Your reasons shows you are an hypocrite..The good news is that 90% of Nigrrians are so you are not alone. You don't want to offend your imaginary god not that you have self-dignity.

Rehdasignature1:
Can you just calm down please and don't turn the scripture upsidedown.

How exactly do one lust on another person?
It's clearly when you see the person and the immoral thought protrudes your mind. After all you see who you lust towards by seeing.

Your turn scripture upside down when you reject what it written so you can instead assert what you think instead.

The very words or Jesus Christ are recorded as saying that the Sin of adultery is committed when one lusts in one's heart after woman- sexual lust in Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28. And this clearly explained that the moment you desire someone sexually you have sinned against God.

What of this do you find hard to grasp?

People like you that are always talk holier than thou...Don't enslave your sense with all this Western doctrines..This una Bible has been over exaggerated.Judging you by that your heavenly standard,nobody,not even you can make heaven. We are all sinners and should seek for his grace..

Stop this your bandage of a thing and higher standard God needs.There is nothing wrong in someone having feels for you

Kobojunkie:
I understand that many an African man was never raised to consider this level of mental self discipline a part of the maturity process, so I won't even enter that argument with you.

However when it comes to God and Jesus Christ, the standard is set high so that only those who are able to attain Holiness/perfection aka a life free from bondage to the urges of the mind, body and soul can in fact enter into the gates of God's Kingdom. So either you choose to rise up to God's standard - God's Will - or you continue to live your life according to your own will. It is that simple!

SugarGirl44:
African man..na them...lolz.
We know your type, you preach against stuff in public but engage in worse crimes secretly.
I don't know how you guys imagine God to be.
I know my own God isn't wicked neither is he an author of confusion, would created sex as a natural occurrence, (married or not you have the urge), then go ahead to throw you in hell for engaging in the same act, knowing fully well that everyone can't be married at every single time for different genuine reasons.

I like this your reasonings,
It makes sense.
It also relaxes the mind,and logically it is what it should be,
But all this are before the very eyes of men.

Have you ever wondered whether the 12 apostles of Christ have urge in any given time after their calling ?
The answer is NO.
you can only develop urge when you are no longer reasoning heavenly.
Heavenly race is not for the spiritually weak,
Or unprepared people.,

God have set his rules,if you don't abide by them you will as well be doomed on the last day

Optimistic4life:
I'm trying hard to live a life free from sin and sexual immorality and I am doing pretty well but of recent, my hormones/body have been raging and I am finding it difficult to cope.

It's 18months I have been separated and there is no getting back together.

Were you ever in my situation, how did you overcome without involving in sex/masturbation?

I just need some words of encouragement.

Its really not easy and it has become some sort of distraction.

The reason I do not want to have a male friend is because of my fear for God.

I’m not in your shoes but I’ve been celibate for a year plus, and when the konji comes I try to preoccupy my mind with other things.
And prayers again, alway pray and ask God to give you the strength to overcome.
And there’s nothing In have male friends, it is what you do with them.

GreatrAnalyst:
You are wrongly dividing the Bible sir.

What are all these?

1. Someone joined by marriage covenant to another is still joined until death separates them, regardless of if they go to court to obtain divorce papers. Marriage covenant is spiritual, you think mere mentioning the word divorce or going to a physical court ends it all?
Why is it that Bible calls it a sin when a spouse divorces his or her partner and marries another except in the case of death or adultery? Which Bible are you reading??

2. Secondly, Paul said marry if you are burning and can't contain it (control yourself). The burning is not the sin, but gratifying the burning unlawfully and/or engaging in lust to satisfy the yearning.

3. Hormones actions are normal, containing them is possible without sinning, but if you can't, simply marry.

Please desist from giving counsel of what you are not sure of.

Thanks.

1. So you are here saying that God lied when in Matthew 5 vs 27 - 32 & Matthew 19 , He gave us His rules regarding divorce is what you mean?

2. So you are saying because of your assumptions regarding what Paul said. Jesus Christ , God's own New Covenant and Law in the Kingdom of God, lie to us when He declared that one commits the sin of sexual lusts - sexually desires another who one is not married to?

3. If you can't contain your hormones marry, and this as opposed to choosing to living as a Eunuch for the sake of God's Kingdom? How noble of you then.

Kobojunkie, are you male or female?

pacespot:
Sexual urge is natural o, i will tell you this based on my experience. When I was much younger, i used to be very religious with a lot of things I did then, even sexual life. But there is one circumstance in which I was tested to the limits. There is this distant cousin of mine who often came to visit, being a lady that i have known since we were kids, i would do anything for her but not to the extent of engaging in an immoral act together. Her constant pestering for such and sexual advances towards me was the only sore point in our friendship. Even though our bloodlines are little separated (distant cousin, remember), i could not fathom myself sleeping with such a person. .

Interesting! My experience is complete opposite of yours. I used to be very sexually active(mentally and physically) and non-religious too - I used to be an atheist about these things- until I finally found God and made the decision to obey Him all the way. Since then I have , by learning His Truth, found that mental discipline, same as monks and those who live as Eunuchs in the world, among others, is really what one needs to obey God's commandment, the rest He then powers eventually.

You say it is impossible because you refuse to discipline your mental, but I know it is possible because I have actually been able to learn and use the same discipline that Buddhist monks and many in other cultures use in keeping themselves from sexually immoral living. So who do you think makes more sense here. The one that blames nature or the one who knows and sees nature is not to blame?

DIVINEEVIDENCE:
Ogbeni stop twisting Scriptures!
In the eyes of God she's still legally married to that man until death separates them.
And it's no sin for one to lust after the one they're legally married to.
Op should try and resolve her differences with her husband, even if it means involving a third party..

So here you conclude that when Jesus Christ stated that sexual lust in the Kingdom of God is the sin of adultery - Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 - , your conclusion is that Jesus Christ lied?

Kobojunkie:
1. The words of Jesus Christ as recorded in Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 are written in plain human language and require no interpretating or translating, unless ofcourse you lot want to twist what is written to instead say what you prefer, as is typical with you churchians.

2. So Jesus Christ lied to His followers, is what you are saying here?

3. The Pharisees also claimed they did what they did for God, so tell us why the grace of God was not handed to them by God?

Yes the word of Christ is written in very clear terms but you clearly misunderstand and misinterpret it. The bible did not say if you have sexual urges that you have sinned. Its only natural for humans to have sexual urges, just like any other natural desires (e.g. a desire to eat when you're hungry).... Rather what the word says is that if you have an intention to go commit the sexual act, that is when it's counted as sin.

If I feel Hot and have no intentions in my heart to go indulge in any inappropriate sexual acts, I have not sinned. But if I harboured an intention to go commit the act, whether I eventually succeed or not, it's already counted as a sin.

So please stop scaring the OP. She only said she felt sexual urges, she didnt say she had any intentions to go actualise them.

SyndyB:
1. Please don't misquote the lady, and please stop misquoting the Bible. Masturbation, Fornication, homosexuality etc are all sin.

2. And in Math 5:27 where you quoted, Jesus said that apart from physical actions that were proscribed as sin in old testament, that mere looking at someone lustfully is a sin. In other words, for it to be a sin you must have subjected your thoughts for sex to the body of a man/woman. It is called LUST when you subject the thought to the shape or physique of another person. God created us with sexual urges, so having such urges is NEVER a sin, such urges can also be controlled. An uncontrolled sexual urges is what leads to lust.

1. They are not sin because Jesus Christ did not command them as sins in the Kingdom of God.

2. I suspect you are here attempting to muddle up the plain words written in this case. In Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28, Jesus Christ gave His followers as new law and standard for adultery. He decreed that instead of the Old Law,the new Law stipulated that Sexual lust - sexual desire for another individual one is not one with - is adultery and sin against God, and this is what I made clear in the post you responded to.

Ishilove:
Kobo, stop reading the scriptures upside down. If sexual urges are sinful, we would not have been given them in the first place. What Matthew 5 vs 28 is exhorting against is lusting after a woman who isn't your own wife, and NOT the urge itself.

Where in any of my posts did I state that sexual urge, not lust,is sin abeg?

Emmanuel30a:
Read to understand... Nothing is offensive in the write up. However, divorce according to the Bible is permitted in case of adultery... Paul in his teachings also pointed out situation where and if you can marry an unbeliever. Meanwhile, . I dont know where you have seen "some of you that were telling lies" ... You mean, you are a liar...

Jesus Christ is the one who is God's Law to you and the standard by which you will be judged, and according to Him, divorce is a sin.... a forgivable sin. God forgives the sin of lying and also the sin of divorce.

Braga90:
3+ decades Liar! Like you're not human or you don't have your desires, no one on nairaland will ever understand the circumstances of you staying celibate for more than 30 years! Which begs the question, are you sexually healthy? Of course not!

Stop rambling.. there are those who have indeed been celibate for even longer than that.

Just because you can't discipline yourself into doing a thing doesn't mean it is impossible to others.

Kobojunkie:
What has preaching the Gospel Truth to do with encouragement abeg?

You think Jesus Christ, the one who commanded that you become Holy and Perfect aka free of sin like His Father said that to encourage you?

There is time for everything says the holy book.

Know the times and seasons for things.

The postor wanted advices on her predicament and not what you did.

The Lord did not rebuke the harloy woman but adviced her to go and sin no more.

He said that as the Lord... Since you are not the Lord, please advice and move on.

I rarely see you on religious page preaching and defending the gospel.

pacespot:
Sexual urge is natural o, i will tell you this based on my experience. When I was much younger, i used to be very religious with a lot of things I did then, even sexual life. But there is one circumstance in which I was tested to the limits. There is this distant cousin of mine who often came to visit, being a lady that i have known since we were kids, i would do anything for her but not to the extent of engaging in an immoral act together. Her constant pestering for such and sexual advances towards me was the only sore point in our friendship. Even though our bloodlines are little separated (distant cousin, remember), i could not fathom myself sleeping with such a person.

One day, the temptation of her wanting us to have sex together came to its head when she intrusively and nakedly walked towards my bathroom while I was having a bath, she just had her own bath in the opposing bathroom, she could have covered herself with the rapper in her hand, but chose not to do so. Now, you have a fully grown and naked woman approaching towards you right inside a bathroom as if she wants to ask you something. Even though I could resist the temptation at that point, i couldn't resist the rush of hormones in my body, and that experience gave me an erection immediately.

So the point I am trying to prove with narrating my experience in this story is that, sexual urge is something that is natural. You could have no intention of having sex with somebody, but that person will still give you an erection if caught in a compromising circumstance, thanks to the hormonal effect in your body.

Hmm what a short story.

Chrismania100:
P
1. People like you that are always talk holier than thou...Don't enslave your sense with all this Western doctrines..This una Bible has been over exaggerated.Judging you by that your heavenly standard,nobody,not even you can make heaven. We are all sinners and should seek for his grace..

2. Stop this your bandage of a thing and higher standard God needs.There is nothing wrong in someone having feels for you

1. The reason many of you abhor any call for mental discipline and hence maturity is you are severally lured by your bodies and not your minds in the way you live. Buddhist monks have for thousands of years adopted the practice of mental discipline in all aspects of living showing that what many of you allow to delude you is nothing but.

2. You are free to continue living under the control of your urges abeg. Allow others rise above them.

My months never reach 18months but it's over 10months... I swear down no be joke e no easy. I occupy myself with alot of reading n hustling. But true be told system go always need am. It's just for u to control am. It's not easy but just have to... Along the line if u sure no way of getting back with him. Advice u carefully put eyes on the ground for a better buddy. Wey go love u n your kids or kid... Mind u. E no easy to get good man so as I said be careful.

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Optimistic4life:
This option is definitely not in the picture at all.

He said I am free to remarry if I want but we aren't divorced and also remarrying isn't a day's affair nor a joke.

obailala:
1. Yes the word of Christ is written in very clear terms but you clearly misunderstand and misinterpret it. The bible did not say if you have sexual urges that you have sinned. Its only natural for humans to have sexual urges, just like any other natural desires (e.g. a desire to eat when you're hungry)....

2. Rather what the word says is that if you have an intention to go commit the sexual act, that is when it's counted as sin.

3. If I feel Hot and have no intentions in my heart to go indulge in any inappropriate sexual acts, I have not sinned. But if I harboured an intention to go commit the act, whether I eventually succeed or not, it's already counted as a sin.

4. So please stop scaring the OP. She only said she felt sexual urges, she didnt say she had any intentions to go actualise them.

1. Where exactly do you have been declaring that what is sin is the sexual urge, as opposed to sexual lust which is clearly depicted in Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28?

Isn't this a clear case of transference?

2. Jesus Christ never said anything about intention being sin, in Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28. Instead what He said is that what is sin is that sexual lust in your heart - that sexual desire you have in your heart towards someone you are not married to - is what is the sin of adultery.

3. If you are Hot and then imagine yourself engaging in sexual acts with the lady next door or your ex, you lust in your heart after such a one one commit adultery by it... that is what Jesus Christ is telling you.

If you are walking down the street and you spot a fine person you desire in your heart to have sexual relations with aka you lust in your heart sexually after that person, you commit the sin of adultery against God - that is what Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 is telling you.

4. Stop trying to twist what is written so it instead says what you want it to.

GardenOfGod:
1. There is time for everything says the holy book.Know the times and seasons for things. The postor wanted advices on her predicament and not what you did.

2. The Lord did not rebuke the harloy woman but adviced her to go and sin no more. He said that as the Lord... Since you are not the Lord, please advice and move on.

3. I rarely see you on religious page preaching and defending the gospel.

1. Interesting claim! So I mind that the OP suggested that she was doing for God that which was clearly not of God,you would rather I not tell her God's Truth about it but rather let her continue in the lie because according to you, it is not the time to tell God's Truth to her?

2. Jesus Christ did not rebuke the harlot woman even when He commanded that she go and sin no more? Seems you read your Bible through special goggles thene.

3. Oh, so I should only preach God's Truth in religion section? LOL....some of you are characters...

Kobojunkie:
If God is really who you claim to want to please by your choice, then you want to make sure you have the right information to help you on your path. According to Jesus Christ, the one who is God's New Covenant and Law in the Kingdom of God, what is sin is not what you refer to as sexual immorality- fornication, masturbation, homosexuality etc. - instead sin is the lust in your heart towards another - Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 - those fantasies and longings for sex are what constitute sin in the Kingdom of God.

So while you claim you have not physically engaged in what is sexually immoral activities in the 18 months period, that all means nothing when you consider that the sin is that committed in your mind/heart and not the physical activity itself.

Incredibly stupid take, but it's alright. Everyone can talk.

Acidosis:
Kobojunkie, are you male or female?

I am gender fluid...any gender you need me to be for to make sense to you.

donmik:
What is really your advice for her now?

Obey God if pleasing /honoring God is what you truly intend on doing.

timefarm:
Just keep quiet and stop misquoting scriptures up and down.

Look whose reacting!