Op, enjoy yourself jare.
Have sex if you want to have sex but ensure that it's protected. Those of you condemning sex aren't wise. How did you come into this world, isn't it through sexual intercourse??

We are just being overtly religious. Honestly, I have been thinking about this for years: how someone who repented after having several affairs in the past will get the same reward with someone who kept themselves till marriage. It doesn't make sense at all.

P.S: As for me, I choose to remain a virgin till marriage

SLOVFO:
Not entirely true.

Birds flying over your head and birds perching and building nests on it are two different things. The mind is a battlefield. Thoughts can fly into your mind because of your past exposures and state of spirituality at the moment. Entertaining and dwelling on those thoughts is what constitutes sin not those thoughts themselves.

OP keep fighting those undesirable thoughts. Ask God for grace, let your mind dwell on God's word more and expose yourself more to the things of God. Unfortunately, some places of worship AKA churches may worsen your case. So chose your company wisely.

The statement in bold was addressed by Jesus Christ in Matthew 15 vs 10 - 20 when He explained to His followers that what comes out of you, thoughts and eventually deeds, come from what is stored up in your heart. If you store lies, even from your past, lies beget sin. If you however stare up the Truth of God, then you will beget the goodness of God. And for this reason, Jesus Christ, in John 8 vs 31 - 32 & John 8 vs 41 - 47 explained that it is only by submitting to and obeying His Truth, that one is able to know and store up Truth in one's heart , Truth which eventually sets one free from bondage to sin.

For instance, Jesus Christ never said you had to ask Him from grace in order to get it. He gave it freely to all who believes in Him - whether they continue to obey Him or not. But because you believe a lie fed you by others that God's grace is only available to those who ask, you continue pronouncing that lie every where you find the opportunity to. But the moment you choose to accept the Truth as told you by Jesus Christ that indeed the grace of God(eternal life) is given freely to all those who believe(not those who ask) , you begin to rid yourself of that act of lying against God.

xynerise:

Hope you are abiding with these scriptures ?

Ofcourse... I don't joke with God since I was not indoctrinated like most. I actually found Him just as He said He could be found and I have no plans to ever loose Him, not that I ever could.

Blunttruth:

If I were in your shoes, I will lure my ex husband and use him just to satisfy my urge. When you are done tell him you need to get up early for work he should excuse you. I am old fashioned, I might not want him and his wahala, but once I have married someone is that person I want to bump uglies with for life.

ROFLMAO


So long as the divorce is not final and ink never dry

Blunttruth:

If I were in your shoes, I will lure my ex husband and use him just to satisfy my urge. When you are done tell him you need to get up early for work he should excuse you. I am old fashioned, I might not want him and his wahala, but once I have married someone is that person I want to bump uglies with for life.

ROFLMAO


So long as the divorce is not yet final

Looking critically at your situation. The task and responsibilities ahead. The divorce that is ongoing.. Plan for your means of livelihood and how to pay your bills without begging any relation.
Respect for yourself not to get involved with someone who you don't really know much about..
These thoughts can help you put sex off your mind.
But the feeling you are experiencing is natural, especially to someone who was once sexually active.
When the divorce is finalised, you may remarry.
Do you mind telling us why you left the first marriage?

evsimmigration:
Story for the gods..Konji never hook you,that is why you are doing all these quotations.Konji na bastard!!
So,when konji naturally holds person, you don't expect the person to think about someone in peace, abi?? Clap for your self... Konji is a natural phenomenon that cannot be biblically scripted,cos konji does not know the Bible or hear the word of God.when it comes. Even that your so called Daddy Pastor used to lust when they see fine babe siting infront of the pupilt while her legs wide open..You cannot tell nature not to act.Even inanimate objects like negative poles always attract like poles,talk more of humanbeings that have feelings.Except that person is medically impotent,or the feelings have died. As for me, feeling is not bad cos I didn't see any wrong doing on it,but when you choose to go after that your heart,it becomes sin..Konji na bastard.My own wouldn't even allow me to sleep when it comes,at that time I will not struggling with the scriptures.

I understand that many an African man was never raised to consider this level of mental self discipline a part of the maturity process, so I won't even enter that argument with you.

However when it comes to God and Jesus Christ, the standard is set high so that only those who are able to attain Holiness/perfection aka a life free from bondage to the urges of the mind, body and soul can in fact enter into the gates of God's Kingdom. So either you choose to rise up to God's standard - God's Will - or you continue to live your life according to your own will. It is that simple!

Kobojunkie:
Have you ever read Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 because that is exactly what Jesus Christ says right there. So I am not certain what scripture you have been reading.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’[e] 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart

Kobo, stop reading the scriptures upside down. If sexual urges are sinful, we would not have been given them in the first place. What Matthew 5 vs 28 is exhorting against is lusting after a woman who isn't your own wife, and NOT the urge itself.

Better find an energetic young healthy guy to knack ur pussy to satisfaction cos we all live once..if u deprive urself all these n punish urself u will soon get old and die..uwa bu ofu mbia!!!

godliman:
1. As good as you admonition might seem, Satan can use it to cause havoc in the OPs life. Yes lust in the heart constitute sin, it is worthy of note however that she is keeping herself from the physical act of immorality (sex, masturbation and porn). It is the step in the right direction.

2. Now she should be encouraged to press further to seeking a pure heart. This will require fasting, prayer, study of God's word and separation from things that ignite sexual lustt, then she should pursue reconciliation with her husband and if her marriage is effectively dead, then she can pray and ask God for another partner.

1. Admonition? None of that I simply explained that her acts, though worthy of honor according to standard of men, holds no water where God's standard and Law, Jesus Christ, is concerned.

2. There is no prayer and fasting stipulated by God as far living a life in obedience of His teachings and commandments. Try to learn to separate the doctrines and traditions of your Pastors and their churches from the Truth of God.

Emmanuel30a:
But your profile speak about living for JESUS CHRIST. Are you no more living 4 JESUS CHRIST? U have forgotten that " man shall not live by bread alone" Why did u got seperated firstly? U better come out of seperation if u can't hold ur body.U can't remarry unless u are a widow probably not up 2 60years old(Paul Advice). If u truly fear GOD,it should begin 2 give u wisdom. Refrain from worldly thought&fast timely.

Stop using God's name to judge that which you have little to no understanding of. They are separated and maybe even divorced... it is not the end of the world.

The God you mentioned did not classify divorce as the unforgivable sin meaning that like the sin of lying which many of you engage in regularly without cleaning mouth, God can forgive whatever fault there may exists in a divorce and remember even that sin no more.

perousd:

Don't mind him. We are biological beings. Sex is a biological need just like food. The problem is lust just like gluttony with food.
That's why Paul advised those that can hold their body to get married. People bring scriptures out of context when it suits them. Don't fall for that trap.

You are wrong! There are people who have lived without sex for over a decade, even more. Monks and even abandoned woman have even without trying shown your claim to be a lie. Please count your teeth before spewing this gibberish abeg!

agabaI23:
Sexual urge is natural and it is no sin. What is sin is giving in to sexual urge and acting on it. She has been resisting the urge.

Sin is direct disobedience of God's commandments, in our case, as given to us by Jesus Christ, God's Law and Gospel in the Kingdom of God.

So where God said in Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 that if you have sexual lust , you commiit the sin of adultery, if means if you do you commit the sin of adultery against God.

Many of you claim to know and even preach the Gospel yet have absolutely no knowledge of what the Gospel is of its details , how?

Johnboom:
God hates divorce. Go back to your formal marriage, be humble, pray that God should touch your husband and that He should make your marriage work.

God also hates lying which He condemns as an abomination to Him yet many of you lie without even wiping mouth regularly and majority don't go back to apologize for the lies believing all that is needed is to ask God for forgiveness, the very same forgiveness available to even those who are divorced.

thorpido:
Why not try to marry again?

Keep doing what you have been doing all these months.Just keep the faith.

Why una Dey call marry like child play? Nah she wan marry abi nah person wan marry her?

My sister I would advise you to masturbate rather than having sex with someone you don’t love

obailala:
1.For your sanity, do not listen to whatever Kobojunkie tells you. Some persons just have a bizarre way of interpreting the bible to make you and everyone else feel bad about themselves, by postulating impossible/impractical things. The fact that you crave 'touch' simply means you are a human with a functional body; God created you that way and it is not a sin to be human.

2. What the bible says about lusting in your heart is largely misconstrued and twisted by fear mongering preachers who make you feel heaven is impossible. The desire for sex is not a sin, especially if you on your own accord, restrained yourself from indulging. It can only be counted as a sin if after thinking about it, you actually intended to go ahead but probably couldn't fulfil the desires because of external factors (e.g. like lack of access to the other sexual partner etc.); in this case, it is counted against you that you've already committed the act in your mind. But if on your own accord you declined to give in to the urges/temptation, then it is no sin.

3. I wish you the very best in your decision to be chaste. Since you do it for God, His grace would help you achieve your desires.

1. The words of Jesus Christ as recorded in Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 are written in plain human language and require no interpretating or translating, unless ofcourse you lot want to twist what is written to instead say what you prefer, as is typical with you churchians.

2. So Jesus Christ lied to His followers, is what you are saying here?

3. The Pharisees also claimed they did what they did for God, so tell us why the grace of God was not handed to them by God?

Alaganature09:


Why una Dey call marry like child play? Nah she wan marry abi nah person wan marry her?

My sister I would advise you to masturbate rather than having sex with someone you don’t love

It's a process na
She needs to allow herself to be open to the process.

DIVINEEVIDENCE:


Op, some of us never had sex for decades.
Personally, I've never been intimate with a woman since '98.

Liar spotted.

Dont you know it's a grievious sin to lie on nairaland

ZooCountry45:
99% of women that had sex mastubate a lot.
I know one and she's a single mother.
She once told me she loves to hear my voice but I never knew she mastubate why we talk on phone.
Make we Bleep naaa, she con dey Form donjazzy

Chai

titusmichael27:
1. I understand the angle you're coming from but it's impossible to live without impure thought. She has been in it for quite some time and her body has been conditioned to those things. She need a therapist. She's trying to be careful. Bad habits are so easy to start but later on, it becomes so difficult if not impossible to stop.

2. At this point I'll say the situation is delicate. My advice to you is to allow yourself to be loved, get acquainted with people. Always , always pray about it. God loves you so much and He knows you personally, I'm sure a good man is on his way. Don't give up please, just hold on a little bit.

1. That isn't true at all. It is indeed possible to be holy/perfect aka free from bondage to sin.

You don't need therapy to help you discipline ýour child, do you? So what makes you think require therapy in order to quit a habit as a human? It is only in the case that one is mentally incapable of controlling oneself that such therapy becomes necessary. She has been able to discipline her body and has not suggested so far that her mind is burdened by sexual thoughts.

2. Loves goes beyond sex, even though many can't seem to separate love love sex because they refuse to discipline their minds as such.

godliman:
Thank you ooo belle sweet me for this godly counsel

doggie or missionary?

Oyelekevictor:
What does your Bible say about divorce,and remarriage

Read Matthew 5 vs 29 - 32 and Matthew 19 vs 3 - 11. Divorce in the case of fornication is not considered a sin. And even if she remarried, like the sin of lying, which is considered an abomination to God, forgiveness awaits those who seek it.

AABBIIMM:
Someone needs an encouragement and you're here proving a point.
1. How does this encourages her, have you now offered a solution to her or you have raise the dust the more?
Well, woman they that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength.
2. And I pray that God's grace will be your strength in this time.

She seeks encouragement in continuing on a path that is against in the name of God?

2. If you understood what God's grace is, you wouldn't go around making claims of it as you do here.

Optimistic4life:
I'm trying hard to live a life free from sin and sexual immorality and I am doing pretty well but of recent, my hormones/body have been raging and I am finding it difficult to cope.

It's 18months I have been separated and there is no getting back together.

Were you ever in my situation, how did you overcome without involving in sex/masturbation?

I just need some words of encouragement.

Its really not easy and it has become some sort of distraction.

The reason I do not want to have a male friend is because of my fear for God.

You are at an age when you should constantly have regular sex. You are not a teenage girl that prays to God to help her control her sexual urge. No matter how hard you try, it'll keep coming. I know I'm not helping by saying this but I just have to be honest with you. I'm also not asking you start sleeping around but well.... You gotta do what you gotta do. Get you a good young man. And if you can't find one, I'm really sorry

GreatrAnalyst:


You are wrongly dividing the Bible sir.

What are all these?

Someone joined by marriage covenant to another is still joined until death separates them, regardless of if they go to court to obtain divorce papers. Marriage covenant is spiritual, you think mere mentioning the word divorce or going to a physical court ends it all?
Why is it that Bible calls it a sin when a spouse divorces his or her partner and marries another except in the case of death or adultery? Which Bible are you reading??

Secondly, Paul said marry if you are burning and can't contain it (control yourself). The burning is not the sin, but gratifying the burning unlawfully and/or engaging in lust to satisfy the yearning.

Hormones actions are normal, containing them is possible without sinning, but if you can't, simply marry.

Please desist from giving counsel of what you are not sure of.

Thanks.

is öral sex a sin?

enonche85:
It's how one reacts to the thought when it come to your mind that matters.

Well, if sex comes to your mind and you react by imagining yourself having sex with that your next door neighbor or that one that got away,you turn that simple thought into sin by that.

Kobojunkie:
Stop using God's name to judge that which you have little to no understanding of. They are separated and maybe even divorced... it is not the end of the world.

The God you mentioned did not classify divorce as the unforgivable sin meaning that like the sin of lying which many of you engage in regularly without cleaning mouth, God can forgive whatever fault there may exists in a divorce and remember even that sin no more.

Read to understand... Nothing is offensive in the write up. However, divorce according to the Bible is permitted in case of adultery... Paul in his teachings also pointed out situation where and if you can marry an unbeliever. Meanwhile, . I dont know where you have seen "some of you that were telling lies" ... You mean, you are a liar...

GardenOfGod:

What is the encouraging words of advice in your epistle to her now?

What has preaching the Gospel Truth to do with encouragement abeg?

You think Jesus Christ, the one who commanded that you become Holy and Perfect aka free of sin like His Father said that to encourage you?

Kaytex:

This is misleading.

You said nothing though..

Arizoner:
is it a sin to lust after your church member?

Matthew 5 vs 27 - 32

Arizoner:
meaning fornication is not a sin

Sexual lust is instead sin.. Matthew 5 vs 27 - 32

Optimistic4life:


So the thought of sex coming through my mind has already made me a sinner?

I'm not the devil but don't mind all these people saying that shit o. I know the bible suggests its a sin. But heck, you were once married and you've tasted the sex before. No way in hell you can do without feeling that way. God knows pretty well it's not a sin. Which kain sin bdat. Just be patient with yourself and pray fervently to God to find you a new man. God be with you.