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Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Mamatukwas: 3:16am On Mar 21, 2022
babythug:


You didn’t add learn local lingua to this list grin

I’m really hopeful for all that can be achieved during the holidays

I’m a bit concerned at the snail pace with which my younger son is being taught . I know “they know everything” but a six year old still being taught 1-20 is worrying. And his teacher says some are still on 1-10 . I just hope the academic intervention I’m planning would help oh

Which local lingua? That anointing will fall on you don’t worry.

P.S- Any academic intervention you’re planning is prolly okay. Be as involved with your kids schooling as you can.

1 Like

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by olabisiogunlana: 6:12am On Mar 21, 2022
quote author=Akorkor post=110873974]Thank you all for this thread. Mother of 2 kids under 6 here. We have registered with a GP but council is yet to verify me. How do I go about this? When can I register them for school? Thinking of bringing the little one back in September. Also what is the fate of a child with speech delay? Is there free therapy or is the therapy expensive?

Also for Council verification, I registered into an application called Yoti as I saw that it aids
quick verification process but my Nigeria address is being rejected. Don’t know what to do.

I stay in Scotland and I just moved in a month ago. Still trying to find my feet. Thank you mothers and Happy international Women’s Day[/quote]
Ma pls can we connect my husband just got admission to Edinburgh university in Scotland and am planning to come with him and my two kids
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Newbie123: 6:35am On Mar 21, 2022
babythug:


You didn’t add learn local lingua to this list grin

I’m really hopeful for all that can be achieved during the holidays

I’m a bit concerned at the snail pace with which my younger son is being taught . I know “they know everything” but a six year old still being taught 1-20 is worrying. And his teacher says some are still on 1-10 . I just hope the academic intervention I’m planning would help oh

This is one thing that really bothers me.

My mum's school for example, 4 year olds are already writing 1-200 and reading Queen premiere and 3 letter words

4 Likes

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by babythug(f): 10:10am On Mar 21, 2022
I know in Nigeria there’s usually an overload of academic material especially for little children and here they do more of experiential learning and encourage children to learn at their pace. But I find/feel it’s making my son somewhat lazy . As in he can comfortably count to 200 but since everyone else is counting to 20 he just sits there and that’s it. Even one of my teenagers is beginning to be academically lazy . I intend to use extra coaching via talking to him for inspiration and start giving him sums /extra school work sourced from the internet to do . This immigrant life and it’s hassles you sha have to be on your toes.

The “poor children “ start feeling like they’re all the same with everyone else and only realise they have to work extra hard to get their spot at the top later !!!

4 Likes

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by babythug(f): 10:12am On Mar 21, 2022
post=110873974]Thank you all for this thread. Mother of 2 kids under 6 here. We have registered with a GP but council is yet to verify me. How do I go about this? When can I register them for school? Thinking of bringing the little one back in September. Also what is the fate of a child with speech delay? Is there free therapy or is the therapy expensive?

Also for Council verification, I registered into an application called Yoti as I saw that it aids
quick verification process but my Nigeria address is being rejected. Don’t know what to do.

I stay in Scotland and I just moved in a month ago. Still trying to find my feet. Thank you mothers and Happy international Women’s Day
Ma pls can we connect my husband just got admission to Edinburgh university in Scotland and am planning to come with him and my two kids[/quote]

Please what is this council verification you speak of?

1 Like

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Akorkor(f): 12:10pm On Mar 21, 2022
olabisiogunlana:
quote author=Akorkor post=110873974]Thank you all for this thread. Mother of 2 kids under 6 here. We have registered with a GP but council is yet to verify me. How do I go about this? When can I register them for school? Thinking of bringing the little one back in September. Also what is the fate of a child with speech delay? Is there free therapy or is the therapy expensive?

Also for Council verification, I registered into an application called Yoti as I saw that it aids
quick verification process but my Nigeria address is being rejected. Don’t know what to do.

I stay in Scotland and I just moved in a month ago. Still trying to find my feet. Thank you mothers and Happy international Women’s Day
Ma pls can we connect my husband just got admission to Edinburgh university in Scotland and am planning to come with him and my two kids

DM. I am not in Edinburgh though but I can assist anyways
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by olabisiogunlana: 2:24pm On Mar 21, 2022
[quote author=Akorkor post=111228164]

DM. I am not in Edinburgh though but I can assist anyways
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Mamatukwas: 9:32pm On Mar 21, 2022
@olabisiogunlana
If you guys are in touch, kindly take your number off Nairaland. For safety reasons.
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Akorkor(f): 10:38pm On Mar 21, 2022
olabisiogunlana:

Thanks so much ma have sent you an email
This is my number

Please remove your number. I didn't quote it so that you can safely remove it
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Ticha: 10:58pm On Mar 21, 2022
Honestly don't worry about what they learn in the first 2 years of school and I say that as a fully qualified teacher. As long as they can identify letters, numbers, some words, they're good to go. Before age 6, the emphasis is on learning through play as well as developing social skills - learning to share, not hitting, can feed themselves, dress themselves, pay attention for short bursts, follow directions etc

In New Zealand where we are, primary school starts the first Monday after a child turns 6. Some children remain at home till that day cos parents can't afford childcare unless they take advantage of Kindy which although is technically a free 20 hours, it's not. They're graduating Drs, Engrs, tradies and all sorts of skilled individuals. It is the same in majority of Scandinavia where their education system is touted as one of the best in the world.

Just keep an eye on what they're learning and buttress it at home by reading to them etc. You can download the EY curriculum and see where they should be at and follow that lead. When they get to around age 8, get Khan Academy - it's free. Then support them through max 15 minutes of work daily, increasing it a bit till you get to 1 hour of study time. That should be around age 10. Basically lay the foundations for them to love learning as school won't do that but allow them to be children too please.

It's coming to summer. Please and please, buy sunscreen and hats for the children! The sun is not as hot as we know it but the level of air pollution is lower so the more harmful rays of the sun passes through. Sun burn is no joke at all and can cause permanent skin damage. Get SPF 50+ for children and at least 35+ for adults. We also need to balance it with getting Vit D. We only need 15 mins of what I call sun worship to get a good dose of Vit D. The good thing is that they will get that 15 mins at school so apply sunscreen in the morning before they leave and they're good to go!

41 Likes 13 Shares

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Mamatukwas: 1:09pm On Mar 22, 2022
Ticha:
Honestly don't worry about what they learn in the first 2 years of school and I say that as a fully qualified teacher. As long as they can identify letters, numbers, some words, they're good to go. Before age 6, the emphasis is on learning through play as well as developing social skills - learning to share, not hitting, can feed themselves, dress themselves, pay attention for short bursts, follow directions etc

In New Zealand where we are, primary school starts the first Monday after a child turns 6. Some children remain at home till that day cos parents can't afford childcare unless they take advantage of Kindy which although is technically a free 20 hours, it's not. They're graduating Drs, Engrs, tradies and all sorts of skilled individuals. It is the same in majority of Scandinavia where their education system is touted as one of the best in the world.

Just keep an eye on what they're learning and buttress it at home by reading to them etc. You can download the EY curriculum and see where they should be at and follow that lead. When they get to around age 8, get Khan Academy - it's free. Then support them through max 15 minutes of work daily, increasing it a bit till you get to 1 hour of study time. That should be around age 10. Basically lay the foundations for them to love learning as school won't do that but allow them to be children too please.

It's coming to summer. Please and please, buy sunscreen and hats for the children! The sun is not as hot as we know it but the level of air pollution is lower so the more harmful rays of the sun passes through. Sun burn is no joke at all and can cause permanent skin damage. Get SPF 50+ for children and at least 35+ for adults. We also need to balance it with getting Vit D. We only need 15 mins of what I call sun worship to get a good dose of Vit D. The good thing is that they will get that 15 mins at school so apply sunscreen in the morning before they leave and they're good to go!


@Ticha of Laive!! 2 bottles of fresh groundnut for you!! Collect kiss kiss

3 Likes

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Ticha: 9:43pm On Mar 22, 2022
Mamatukwas:


@Ticha of Laive!! 2 bottles of fresh groundnut for you!! Collect kiss kiss

I go collect that fresh groundnut o! I miss it so much! It doesn't taste the same in the abroad at all!

2 Likes

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Mamatukwas: 11:49pm On Mar 22, 2022
Ticha:


I go collect that fresh groundnut o! I miss it so much! It doesn't taste the same in the abroad at all!

It never does! Buzz me when you’re back n il hook you up.

2 Likes

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by endinpraise907: 9:42am On Mar 24, 2022
Well-done mama. God bless you

Ticha:


I don't speak my language at home because my husband is not Nigerian and of course does not understand the language. However, they all understand certain words and whenever I switch, my children sit up and take notice cos e mean say I don vex grin

My children are also mixed race so there's the knowing their culture from my perspective, their culture from their father's perspective and their culture as mixed British children who will probably be classed as black British especially my twin 1. Because we now also live in a completely different country temporarily, they're firmly third culture kids!

Few things I do:

1. Everyone calls them by their traditional names. They also call themselves by those names as well. At school, they use their first names which are English names but everyone - in-laws, friends, neighbours. They will correct people who pronounce their names wrongly as well which I love.
I enforce the Nigerian respect with a few allowances. So they can't call any adult by name. Some very close friends (very few) are Aunty and Uncle. Everyone else is Mr, Mrs or Miss. They must without fail greet anyone that walks into our home and respond when greeted. I encourage them to refuse body contact as they wish ie hugs, hand shakes.

2. Our night time reading includes books from home. We're currently reading Passport of Mallam Illiya. I talk about the north (which is where I am from), we locate the different places on the map and as I speak Hausa very fluently - I teach them some words in Hausa as well.

3. We have a library full of books from home and other African and African American writers. Their hands down favourite books are the Binti Series by Nnedi Okoroafor and she writes comics too which my husband loves.

4. We eat a wide variety of food and I always link it back to similar foods back home with the proper names and pronunciation.

5. All my work clothes - without exception are made from Ankara and so are their clothes. Luckily they don't wear uniform at their school either.

6. We schedule a 2 weekly video call with my siblings. It lasts for several hours and no, we just don't sit and talk. We do our normal household things as well. It means they have some sort of glimpse into life at home, see their cousins in their own home and space. This weekend's call, my sister was having a small get together so we participated virtually. There was all the greeting, singing, shouting - you know what our gatherings are like cheesy

7. I try to find suitable movies to watch - this is bit trickier as majority are not kid friendly at all. So we watch SA movies too.

8. I have very close Nigerians and African friends that share similar values. Luckily for me, I can speak a few Nigerian languages so will often speak Yoruba (by far the largest number of Nigerians I've met abroad), Hausa, Idoma (very rare to find them), Igala with friends we visit.

Little steps - it's not quite enough but we'll get there. We do have plans to go live in 9ja for about 2 years in the future. Of course that totally depends on employment opportunities as I can't imagine living at home and blowing through our savings for 2 whole years!

1 Like

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by mumzt: 2:54pm On Mar 25, 2022
Susom:
I stated that he was not joining us as he was working and resident in Nigeria, that was the only reason I stated for him not joining us anyway. He wrote a letter saying that as well.

Well, it’s possible there are rejections also but my point is , it’s not impossible as I was approved to come in without my husband
Also, I didn’t come on a student Visa, I don’t know if the approval would have been different.

I know it can make the application process difficult but it’s not impossible that’s why I shared my own experience. However, I wish we applied with hun because he has now been travelling with Visit Visa ( some Point of entry officers can make this difficult with questions about his job or why he is always coming into the Uk) and also if your partner applies with you, making switches to depend on each other interms of visa types can be easier.

Having said that please apply with your partner @poster even if he wouldn’t be resident here but for easy entry.

For my renewal I will add my husband as I now have another baby.




Yes, I think it's because it wasn't a student visa.

Also, people that are allowed on student visas without their spouses are those married to military personnel's. You'd need to add a consent letter from the partner that's not applying and also write a letter explaining that he's in the military(with Proof of course) and he can be posted anywhere at anytime. So kids will be more stable with you.
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Midex88(m): 9:35pm On Mar 30, 2022
Ok
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Mamatukwas: 5:47pm On Mar 31, 2022
Uk Parents How Far? Ya’ll have been quiet.

So there’s this little girl in my son’s class that has a habit of asking me for biscuits after school every day because my son used to share his snacks and she became hooked.

It’s now a running joke amongst us the moms and I actually try to always take something for her because she will ask. Oyibo see it as nothing, it cracks her mum up, but we naija would have shouted n warned any of our kids if they try that kind of move (me inclusive smiley

The experience is teaching me to chill a little and cut our kids some slack. I think we can actually be quite strict with our kids. It has a way of impacting their confidence. It’s finding the right balance that can be the issue. God help us oh.

Hope you people are sha gathering energy for Easter break.

11 Likes

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by nnennachiji(f): 6:52pm On Mar 31, 2022
I live in the USA but am enjoying the parenting advice . I have a 3 year old and he will be starting prekindergarten 3 in August , please which prekindergarten is better Montessori , classical education or regular prekindergarten. He got offer from Alief Montessori community school in Houston, KIPP sharp college prep charter school, westchase classical academy and Harvard elementary all in Houston. I am confused the one to choose , am a new immigrant and almost all have good ratings.

5 Likes

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Mamatukwas: 7:03pm On Mar 31, 2022
nnennachiji:
I live in the USA but am enjoying the parenting advice . I have a 3 year old and he will be starting prekindergarten 3 in August , please which prekindergarten is better Montessori , classical education or regular prekindergarten. He got offer from Alief Montessori community school in Houston, KIPP sharp college prep charter school, westchase classical academy and Harvard elementary all in Houston. I am confused the one to choose , am a new immigrant and almost all have good ratings.

Unfortunately I’m not sure if you’ll be able to get informed advice on the ‘best’ option for you from this thread.

I know Montessori is great for teaching kids to be independent and confident humans but you have to be willing to follow the principles at home if not you’ll confuse him. Otherwise get first hand info from people who live in your city, other Mums and the internet. Best of luck
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by nnennachiji(f): 8:55pm On Mar 31, 2022
Mamatukwas:


Unfortunately I’m not sure if you’ll be able to get informed advice on the ‘best’ option for you from this thread.

I know Montessori is great for teaching kids to be independent and confident humans but you have to be willing to follow the principles at home if not you’ll confuse him. Otherwise get first hand info from people who live in your city, other Mums and the internet. Best of luck

Thank you I appreciate
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by babythug(f): 12:10pm On Apr 01, 2022
Mamatukwas:

Uk Parents How Far? Ya’ll have been quiet.

So there’s this little girl in my son’s class that has a habit of asking me for biscuits after school every day because my son used to share his snacks and she became hooked.

It’s now a running joke amongst us the moms and I actually try to always take something for her because she will ask. Oyibo see it as nothing, it cracks her mum up, but we naija would have shouted n warned any of our kids if they try that kind of move (me inclusive smiley

The experience is teaching me to chill a little and cut our kids some slack. I think we can actually be quite strict with our kids. It has a way of impacting their confidence. It’s finding the right balance that can be the issue. God help us oh.

Hope you people are sha gathering energy for Easter break.

Hmmm!!!
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Kijaz(f): 1:33pm On Apr 01, 2022
Hello mamas, una well done ����

Please I need a little help in deciding where we would stay when we arrive in September, family of 4 (2 daughters 6&3)

I'ld be schooling in London and can't seem to figure out what area outside Central London is suitable.

In terms of affordable accommodation, good schools, safe environment for the kids & activities for them, job opportunities, and also travel time less than an hour to Central London.

Please I'm really looking forward to your recommendations.

Thanks a lot. ��
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by LagosismyHome(f): 3:05pm On Apr 01, 2022
Kijaz:
Hello mamas, una well done ����

Please I need a little help in deciding where we would stay when we arrive in September, family of 4 (2 daughters 6&3)

I'ld be schooling in London and can't seem to figure out what area outside Central London is suitable.

In terms of affordable accommodation, good schools, safe environment for the kids & activities for them, job opportunities, and also travel time less than an hour to Central London.

Please I'm really looking forward to your recommendations.

Thanks a lot. ��

What your budget for a 2 bed
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Kijaz(f): 4:01pm On Apr 01, 2022
Less than 1500


LagosismyHome:


What your budget for a 2 bed
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Ticha: 11:27pm On Apr 01, 2022
Kijaz:
Hello mamas, una well done ����

Please I need a little help in deciding where we would stay when we arrive in September, family of 4 (2 daughters 6&3)

I'ld be schooling in London and can't seem to figure out what area outside Central London is suitable.

In terms of affordable accommodation, good schools, safe environment for the kids & activities for them, job opportunities, and also travel time less than an hour to Central London.

Please I'm really looking forward to your recommendations.

Thanks a lot. ��

I'm assuming you won't be driving into London? Therefore you need to follow the train lines. Based on the time tables, you can see from which stations you can get into central London under an hour then start house hunting there. Be very aware that all those cities will also have a London mark up prices for rental purposes and the closer to the station the property is, the more expensive it will be as well.

The husbot worked in London for 18 months and we wanted to be within an hour's train ride (got in at Euston Station), we ended up in St Neots. It was 42 minutes to Euston and a relatively small market town with everything you need. I think I still have the spreadsheet we created with all the train times/ costs (costs would be wildly different now) and rental cost (also different). If you send me your email address, I'll forward it on to you and it may help you narrow down your choices.

2 Likes

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Ticha: 11:42pm On Apr 01, 2022
Kijaz:
Hello mamas, una well done ����

Please I need a little help in deciding where we would stay when we arrive in September, family of 4 (2 daughters 6&3)

I'ld be schooling in London and can't seem to figure out what area outside Central London is suitable.

In terms of affordable accommodation, good schools, safe environment for the kids & activities for them, job opportunities, and also travel time less than an hour to Central London.

Please I'm really looking forward to your recommendations.

Thanks a lot. ��

PS - https://www.nationalrail.co.uk/London_South_East_Network_Railcard_map_Dec-2021.pdf

This maps all the trains coming into London. Obviously it doesn't tell you time it takes so you'll need to go on the national rail website and start mapping the times, cost etc. Then go to Rightmove and check rental prices for properties in that area - make it 0.5 as that's walkable. Anymore than that and you'll need to get a bus/ drive etc which of course will add to your journey time and costs. That was essentially what we did when we were deciding.

If you will only be in London 2 or 3 times a week, I'd suggest looking as far as the Midlands actually as the fast trains are a max 90 minutes so if you're living in Rugby for example (cheap rent yay!) that might take 50 minutes, Northampton (also cheap rent) - 45 minutes, Milton Keynes (more expensive rent) 30 minutes etc
Or the South West so working backwards from Bristol, Bath, Swindon, Didcot etc...

Hope that makes sense.

5 Likes

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by 1stGenAmerican(f): 5:14am On Apr 02, 2022
nnennachiji:
I live in the USA but am enjoying the parenting advice . I have a 3 year old and he will be starting prekindergarten 3 in August , please which prekindergarten is better Montessori , classical education or regular prekindergarten. He got offer from Alief Montessori community school in Houston, KIPP sharp college prep charter school, westchase classical academy and Harvard elementary all in Houston. I am confused the one to choose , am a new immigrant and almost all have good ratings.

I’m in the US and I would recommend Kipp Sharp Charter. Charter schools usually have better curricula than Montessori schools which tend to used outdated curriculum

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by LagosismyHome(f): 11:06am On Apr 02, 2022
Kijaz:
Less than 1500

Enough places with this budget...be it north, west, south or north London... and even if you want just outside London
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Kijaz(f): 12:20pm On Apr 02, 2022
Thank you so much Ticha


Ticha:


PS - https://www.nationalrail.co.uk/London_South_East_Network_Railcard_map_Dec-2021.pdf

This maps all the trains coming into London. Obviously it doesn't tell you time it takes so you'll need to go on the national rail website and start mapping the times, cost etc. Then go to Rightmove and check rental prices for properties in that area - make it 0.5 as that's walkable. Anymore than that and you'll need to get a bus/ drive etc which of course will add to your journey time and costs. That was essentially what we did when we were deciding.

.
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by nnennachiji(f): 10:21pm On Apr 02, 2022
1stGenAmerican:


I’m in the US and I would recommend Kipp Sharp Charter. Charter schools usually have better curricula than Montessori schools which tend to used outdated curriculum
.

Thanks I appreciate. I will go with Kipp

1 Like

Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Evagreenfields: 11:17pm On Apr 02, 2022
Hello @Ticha,

Please can you send me this spreadsheet too? evagreenfields@gmail.com

Thanks.

Ticha:


I'm assuming you won't be driving into London? Therefore you need to follow the train lines. Based on the time tables, you can see from which stations you can get into central London under an hour then start house hunting there. Be very aware that all those cities will also have a London mark up prices for rental purposes and the closer to the station the property is, the more expensive it will be as well.

The husbot worked in London for 18 months and we wanted to be within an hour's train ride (got in at Euston Station), we ended up in St Neots. It was 42 minutes to Euston and a relatively small market town with everything you need. I think I still have the spreadsheet we created with all the train times/ costs (costs would be wildly different now) and rental cost (also different). If you send me your email address, I'll forward it on to you and it may help you narrow down your choices.
Re: Parenting In The UK As A Nigerian Migrant. by Ticha: 12:56am On Apr 03, 2022
Evagreenfields:
Hello @Ticha,

Please can you send me this spreadsheet too? evagreenfields@gmail.com

Thanks.


Sent

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