₦airaland Forum

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

Madam,long story short.
U wan Waka ur Waka unhindered

ASHAWO DEY HUNGRY THIS ONE. YOU WANT TO BE SINGLE AND FREE INDEED.

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

Even all the angels will blame you if u leave a good man. Since you are ready for the consequence and what you want will give u peace of mind. Pls go ahead and work out of the marriage.

Dont forget to update us ( online family)

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

Just tell us that you want to sample other life's servings and quit blackmailing a good man. You married a man at age 19. Now 33 you believe you made the wrong choice.

Women and selfishness. And you have no fault in the reason he flares up right?. Just apologize to that man for bringing his good name to disrepute even if you think you are exalting him by saying he is a good man.

OlawaleBammie:
U re very selfish and insensitive, u disgust me. Once again u re very selfish to the core.

Sebi u have gained wat u want, ur retirement plan(the kids) that is how most of ur mates are doing na. Congratulations ma.

Now u can divorce him after u have used him to gain wat u want.

Am pretty sure u had nothing wen u guys married, at 19, u were practically a burden to him, what a poor man he is...

Now after carrying ur burden all these years this is what u have to pay him in return abi.

The young man laboured to put u in, take care of u and am sure ur family would have bn beneficiaries of his benevolence but wen its tym for u to build the great future u guys needed, wen its tym for u to join hands with him to build the empire for your children u suddenly want to back out just for the freedom of receiving random dicks.

Madam u can go, just tell the poor man ur plan and stop maltreating him emotionally before they acuse him of domestic violence (as a result of ur maltreatment towards him)

How i wished he had turned u to baby mama from the onset, how i wished, wen he met u den in his mind he has found a future partner , future partner my foot.

Madam please file for divorce before u implicate the young ma, but am sure the universe has its way of locating everyone with his or her reward.









To be sincere, men shouldn't be marrying again, just give one or two random girls belle and drop out, if this is what they called marriage ooh, den men has no business with it, i just pity those who are kneeling down to propose

Am sure the man would have knelt down wen he wanted to propose to this deeperlife bible church goer ooh

You get time for that Olosho of a wife. I dont blame her, I blame the stupid husband who placed her above her standard, while depriving himself good things of life thinking he is building future for his family.

The fact is that, women can only leave a good man who they thought he's now below their standards. If he has treated the fool the way she is, maybe she would've get sense with ease. Imaging someone want a divorce because of quarrel of 3 times a years withiout beating and with no other faults.

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

If he is a good husband, then what else do you want?

From your story, all I see is a woman who just needs some space. You are being choked.

You need some alone-time from your husband. I don't think it is a bad thing.

Just find a way to get away for a while. If you can save up, move to a new location for a change. Visit interesting places (zoos, cinemas, etc). Enjoy your life. After a while, you will miss your husband, and return home.

janejjjjj5000:
No, sir. We have not.

This is a good idea.

I just feel so tired and unmotivated to work on the marriage.

then your mind is made up. leave and be ready to stay away because you'll seek for a way back and i hope you never find it

So the man gets angry by himself?

BluntTheApostle:
If he is a good husband, then what else do you want?

From your story, all I see is a woman who just needs some space. You are being choked.

You need some alone-time from your husband. I don't think it is a bad thing.

Just find a way to get away for a while. If you can save up, move to a new location for a change. Visit interesting places (zoos, cinemas, etc). Enjoy your life. After a while, you will miss your husband, and return home.

and why should the man wait for her? you can't eat your cake and expect others to share theirs with you.

yemmit90:
You get time for that Olosho of a wife. I dont blame her, I blame the stupid husband who placed her above her standard, while depriving himself good things of life thinking he is building future for his family.

The fact is that, women can only leave a good man who they thought he's now below their standards. If he has treated the fool the way she is, maybe she would've get sense with ease. Imaging someone want a divorce because of quarrel of 3 times a years withiout beating and with no other faults.

as in eehn, she was even confirming it that the man is a very nice man ooh, lol

She said her children are going tru emotional trauma, am sure she must have poisoned the mind of those children towards their father.

Dont worry bro, karma is always happy to deal with such shenanigans. She wil regret it believe me, i have many more stories of people like her at my disposal. She wil surely cry.


Could u believe some oloriburuku men are even supporting her well sha

BluntTheApostle:
If he is a good husband, then what else do you want?

From your story, all I see is a woman who just needs some space. You are being choked.

You need some alone-time from your husband. I don't think it is a bad thing.

Just find a way to get away for a while. If you can save up, move to a new location for a change. Visit interesting places (zoos, cinemas, etc). Enjoy your life. After a while, you will miss your husband, and return home.

and u tink there wil still be a place for her?? Lol, not in my house ma. U can goan hoe around all u want ma.

The truth of the matter is you are an ingrate and you don't value what you have until it slips off your hands.

You have a type of husband with all this qualities and still complaining of just a character of him. Do you know how many of your bad characters he has been enduring just to make you happy and to keep his family ? I will not join other people that will be preaching to you not to leave your marriage.
The only thing I can figure out is that you want to be in control of yourself and not under any man.
Please leave your marriage because the choice is yours .

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

Why have you avoided talking about the man that is pressing your mumu button? he will not marry you with 4 children, just know that and have peace!

Very very nice of you, I’d advice you leave too if you were my sister, you deserve better, go and rock your world girl, explore your youthful age that you’ve already passed, we will be here waiting by Gods grace if there’ll be another news. Tchau

Beremx:
Comparing his wrongs to rights which is in the ratio of 1:10, Madam you have a very good husband. If you are tired of the marriage, another woman will gladly enjoy your loving husband.

Please ask her why the husband even gets angry. Is she verbally abusive? Is there something she does that he doesn't like.

See how she shifted the blame from herself.
She must be perfect! Really?

BluntTheApostle:
If he is a good husband, then what else do you want?

From your story, all I see is a woman who just needs some space. You are being choked.

You need some alone-time from your husband. I don't think it is a bad thing.

Just find a way to get away for a while. If you can save up, move to a new location for a change. Visit interesting places (zoos, cinemas, etc). Enjoy your life. After a while, you will miss your husband, and return home.

which home? That of her parents I guess

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

madam I beg no insult, this is not why u want leave, just be open, which kind talk is this , he only get angry 3 times in a year and ur complaining, just imagining, what do u really want, I like been fair, there must be something else not this, who dose this, nice man, and ur walking away because he gets angry three times in a year, how else do u want him to excise his anger, the kids need to lean that part too, everything in a marriage is leaning, they need that part too, to also know how to go about that part in life.

Your village people is after you and your eyes would soon be opened . Statistically, your husband possesses 90% qualities of a good husband, you're only dwelling on 10% weakness to divorce him.Are you 100% perfect? Answer yourself and make your choice

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

janejjjjj5000:
I am tired. I have a better view of marriage. He is not meeting up. My children are saying that the way he talks when upsets affects them. The children cry and he apologizes to all of us. I know I sound confused but I am just tired. I feel that my children will not be seeing this when we divorce. That is why I don't want the marriage anymore. I just want all round peace. I am tired.

Save us all these unnecessary explanations and proceed with the divorce to licence you to start fuc-king around. You married at 19, so you obviously didn't have enough time for adolescence, hence the unfilled vacuum that is getting you confused.
Wish you luck but I promise you it must end in tears.

janejjjjj5000:
Thank you, sir.

I think I will go for counseling. He has told me he is willing to go for counseling. He is begging me not to end the marriage.

He is even begging you not to leave. Such a weak man. He must have groomed and spoilt you into such an unreasonable lady you have become. Get gone already.

OlawaleBammie:
how, explain pls

Most of them are ingrate they don't know what they have until they lose it, she should be committed to her husband

U are not sincere because u have not told us the exact thing u want to leave ur marriage for. May be u want to test the world,go ahead,but i promise u,u will later regret it.if it is only these things u mention here is the sin of the man u called ur hubby.i think u need a councilor before u regret the steps u are About to take.

janejjjjj5000:
No, sir. We have not.

This is a good idea.

I just feel so tired and unmotivated to work on the marriage.

You need a vacation. Start going to mfm weekly deliverance in prayer city so that you can get away from your home. That's how people that don't want to spend too much money take their own vacation.

nenyewrites:
You need a vacation. Start going to mfm weekly deliverance in prayer city so that you can get away from your home. That's how people that don't want to spend too much money take their own vacation.

A vacation to go get stuffed with yet more delusions and lies?

ROFLMAO

Hassanmaye:
Most of them are ingrate they don't know what they have until they lose it, she should be committed to her husband

i have learnt one lesson, but thank goodness i didn't learn it the hard way.


Never raise a woman up at ur expense, never!!! Never!!!

Instead, exploit her capabilities for the betterment of the both of u.

Instead of me to open a company for u as a woman just cus i want to please u, i wil open the company in my name and let u oversea the affairs of the company, if things turn south in the near future and u want to pack out, goodbye ni, na u lose no be me, my company stil remain with me, and if u support me and manage the business well and u dont tink of packing out den the gain is there for the both of us. Sense will not kill me

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

You are so confused but you don't know it yet.

2braithe:
This is not enough reason to leave a marriage.

If he is not a domestic abuser nor a repeat philanderer,your ship can still sail.

The next marriage you will enter(if you want to remarry),he might be worse.


As for me, nothing concerns me with getting married
The number of married people complaining is enough proof

I made this decision 5 years ago, anytime I see complains like this I renew my vow not to marry

Sanchez01:
She married too early. That's the problem here. This is often a thing with those who get married early. She is bored, wants independence and suddenly wants to be alone to explore. I'd say it's pretty normal.

I know someone who got married at 21, has three kids and now wants to leave just because she wants to live life and never had the chance to while she was younger.

What is the meaning of live life? can't you live life with hubby? Oh you fvck as many bad boy big dicks as possible abi

OlawaleBammie:
i have learnt one lesson, but thank goodness i didn't learn it the hard way.


Never raise a woman up at ur expense, never!!! Never!!!

Instead, exploit her capabilities for the betterment of the both of u.

Instead of me to open a company for u as a woman just cus i want to please u, i wil open the company in my name and let u oversea the affairs of the company, if things turn south in the near future and u want to pack out, goodbye ni, na u lose no be me, my company stil remain with me, and if u support me and manage the business well and u dont tink of packing out den the gain is there for the both of us. Sense will not kill me

I guess it's because you read the redpill if na SIMPle man Na to buy the company in her name

Kobojunkie:
1. Marriages crumbling is a sign that standards are changing hopefully for the better. People finally realizing that marriage is not for everyone and there is absolutely no reason to sit tight in a toxic relationship, in the name of marriage, is a good thing.

2. Again, peace exists in this life. If you are in a hot situation where you have no peace, it means you are not were peace is. Those in the grave have no peace since they are dead and cannot discern such things. Only the living csn discern peace from chaos.

3. Even in relationship, if you have none of what you refer to as "inner" peace, what you have chaos aka stress, a killer of men. If it takes you becoming an island for you to live stress free, it is better to do just that than be in hurry to enter your grave.

4. She mentioned two important things that you conveniently overlooked. Her children are being affected emotionally by her husband's tantrums, and she herself seems emotionally drained to the point she believes it better to be single than continue to endure. That there is not a woman who has peace in her marriage.

My friends standards are fixed, God created marriage and gave the manual not oyinbo, people are bound to evolve buh deviating from the marriage conventions is why there is so much problem. In Op cases i don't see where the toxicity is, maybe you need to read her comments before rambling some more.

She is just being petite, can any of us here swear we didnt grow up seein our parent argue or abuse one another so weytin hapoen to us, to the best of her knowledge leaving the marriage & kids is less traumatizing to the kids than the tantrums she loathe
TBH ! can two people cohabitate without quarrels, where tongue & teeth fight is hurting one another even inevitable. some of you still need to be under una parent receiving sense.
I pray OP leaves inside and come outside cos only then she fit no fantasy full outside, as for the husband may God compensate him with a woman deserving his love.

SmartPolician:
janejjjjj5000


If this is why you are disturbing us on Nairaland, madam, you don't have a problem.

Tell your parents that you are done with marriage because of this flimsy reason and they will forget their hands on your face.

This life is funny! You want to throw away what tens of thousands of young ladies pray and fast for. Indeed, women's needs are obviously insatiable.

Na mumu dey try to make woman happy

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

I would have said u should try to visit a marriage counsellor but i remember what happened in Ozark, the man and woman went and visited that woman to advise them on their marriage...

These two use money finish counsellor job.

Before u know, counsellor don buy tear rubber car worth more than her income..

Madam know say the husband dey match her bribery more than her.

Abeg who get new season?