Hassanmaye:

I guess it's because you read the redpill if na SIMPle man Na to buy the company in her name

No, not cus i read the redpill ooh, naturally i hate cheating and i knows for sure that women are prone to cheating. They easily gather pity from outsiders and they are everly looked after, so for me to balance tins up i gat take care of mysef to the extreme, i gat to look after mysef, put mysef up before u and never lower my guard just cus i am in yeye love with u(cus in my mind i know u dont love me, u re only with me cus of wat i can offer)

Bro dont say i am self-centred cus na me hustle for everything i need in my life, no woman rendered help apart from my mother, so if i usey resources which i got by mysef alone to take care of mysef den i am not sellfish sir.

I can be ur partner but will never be ur slave, never

I think you're even lucky to have that kinda man considering the number of irresponsible men we have these days. In your 11 years of marriage you can only say that's his weakness n to say he even apologizes speaks vol . He's aware n he wants to change . Madam count your blessings you're lucky ooo

I think you're even lucky to have that kinda man considering the number of irresponsible men we have these days. In your 11 years of marriage you can only say that's his weakness n to say he even apologizes speaks vol . He's aware n he wants to change . Madam count your blessings you're lucky ooo.Its very likely the next man you meet will be worse

janejjjjj5000:
I am tired. I have a better view of marriage. He is not meeting up. My children are saying that the way he talks when upsets affects them. The children cry and he apologizes to all of us. I know I sound confused but I am just tired. I feel that my children will not be seeing this when we divorce. That is why I don't want the marriage anymore. I just want all round peace. I am tired.

This 'my children', na ur papa put u belle or wetin?
Is the children not his too?

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

Leave the marriage,be free then.Seems someone outside there is deceiving you. Go on divorce him.Instead of going for therapy with him.Or talking about it

OlawaleBammie:
as in eehn, she was even confirming it that the man is a very nice man ooh, lol

She said her children are going tru emotional trauma, am sure she must have poisoned the mind of those children towards their father.

Dont worry bro, karma is always happy to deal with such shenanigans. She wil regret it believe me, i have many more stories of people like her at my disposal. She wil surely cry.


Could u believe some oloriburuku men are even supporting her well sha

The oloriburuku men supporting her want to fück what do you expect


Women can truly never be pleased

Just do your best, so incase she’s the type who can never be pleased

You will have no regrets having done your best

NaijaCowFarm:


Why have you avoided talking about the man that is pressing your mumu button? he will not marry you with 4 children, just know that and have peace!

na aśhawo work dey hungry her no be lie

Nigerians can be very biased and very unbalanced in their judgements with their stereotypical prejudiced misinterpretations.

Eleven pages of people judging a woman who speaks up about her situationship. If it were a case where one committed suicide out of depression, the same people would say why did she or him not speak up.. The comments of 95% of people on this thread is sick and troubling and imagine the set of humans condemning another.

However wrong of flawed we may consider people's actions and decisions, can we not have a civil way of expressing our views and ideas about issues? Na wa. No wonder the nation is in a quagmire, a nation of stirk illiterates posing as elites


See condemnation and judgement everywhere like the woman doesn't have legit concerns that could/would have rather be counselled the right way !


Madam Op, you're both just stuck cause you've spent so much time together doing sam ol every day. I highly recommend 2 or 3 days vacation you both will consensually agree to, and take in turns, so you both can expreience some newness, fresh air and push out the negative energy in your relationship.

May the Lord help you heal. I am willing to speak with you if you like someone to talk with.
There are issues in this relationship that needs speaking to someone to help you get better and come out of the loop

Foolish people. Make una push her to depression and suicide na. Cause una want project una marital fears to her. illiterates

Well, am not surprised though, you married at the age of 19. No experience at all

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

OlawaleBammie:


No, not cus i read the redpill ooh, naturally i hate cheating and i knows for sure that women are prone to cheating. They easily gather pity from outsiders and they are everly looked after, so for me to balance tins up i gat take care of mysef to the extreme, i gat to look after mysef, put mysef up before u and never lower my guard just cus i am in yeye love with u(cus in my mind i know u dont love me, u re only with me cus of wat i can offer)

Bro dont say i am self-centred cus na me hustle for everything i need in my life, no woman rendered help apart from my mother, so if i usey resources which i got by mysef alone to take care of mysef den i am not sellfish sir.

I can be ur partner but will never be ur slave, never

Wow

OlawaleBammie:
as in eehn, she was even confirming it that the man is a very nice man ooh, lol

She said her children are going tru emotional trauma, am sure she must have poisoned the mind of those children towards their father.

Dont worry bro, karma is always happy to deal with such shenanigans. She wil regret it believe me, i have many more stories of people like her at my disposal. She wil surely cry.


Could u believe some oloriburuku men are even supporting her well sha

Majority of Nairalanders are underage,students, and singles. Dont be surprise those that are supporting her knows next to nothing about marriage.

Spiritually you are possess, physically you are sick...
Normal routine everyday makes one tired and frustrated.
Crave for new adventures and set a goal for your self.

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

MASTAkiLLAh:
I'm also a Winner but I'll be the first to tell you that talk is bullshít and misleading. Psychologists will as a matter of fact tell you that there's always a high probability of conflict when two or more people occupy the same space/house. Successful marriages aren't about lack of arguments, they are about successfully overcoming such scenarios in unity. I remember the late F.R.A Williams kids saying they never heard their parents arguing, that doesn't mean it never happened, it means they did all arguments in private away from their kids ears. I suggest therapy like someone said and also, you'll need a heart to heart talk with oga telling him what you don't like when you have issues. I also strongly suggest important talks should be held in privacy. We've known what he did to piss you off but we don't know what you do to make him blow his top, it's a two way thing in arguments. After the therapy, take a two week vacation with oga even if it's Ghana or Dubai, drop the kids with your parents

You go to winners chapel? I thought you hate Afonjas?

I think what you need to do is to sit down with him and have a deep discussion about this issue. Truth be told, we all are not perfect even though we expect perfection from others. That he gets angry like 3 times a year makes him look like a saint. Sometimes, children can get on one's nerve and the usual reaction for most people is to flare up. Try and discuss it with him. Don't let your children separate you from your husband. Very soon, they will all leave you and start their own respective families. It's good to know that companionship is very important and old age can be lonely. So be careful with your decision. Don't make a permanent decision based on temporary feelings. Life can be lonely without a companion.

Occasionally, you guys may need some time out together without the kids. Drop them off with grannies and spend like two or three days together away from home. This can rejuvenate the sparks.

Another thing is; how is the sex life? This can as well be a trigger as some women feel so reluctant about that department as they grow older. After four children, some may feel uninterested in that area yet the man is demanding for it and it aggravates the whole thing. Talk to him about it. Marriage is talk and talk. You have got to let your partner know how you feel, albeit, in a respectful and loving way.

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

Then try someone else, he who say education is costly, let him try illiteracy.

janejjjjj5000:
I am tired. I have a better view of marriage. He is not meeting up. My children are saying that the way he talks when upsets affects them. The children cry and he apologizes to all of us. I know I sound confused but I am just tired. I feel that my children will not be seeing this when we divorce. That is why I don't want the marriage anymore. I just want all round peace. I am tired.

And how are u sure u will win custody of the children when u divorce??

Your eyes don dey outside to flex...Adultery sweet ho but na destruction they end am

Oga madam.
Sorry to say.
I am not here to massage your ego but to tell you the truth.

Na you get problem.
Na you be the problem.
You are full of ego.

So your husband can not rant but you can do so right whenever you so wish right?
Do you know how he feels when you rant and nag?

But when he does so, according to you 3 times a year at most, you see him as a devil.

Is there any marriage void of challenges?
Is there any home void of its own shouting and shouting?
Maybe yes, but how many?
When we shout we settle the very next minute. That's what matured couple do.

You know the truth, someone is deceiving you somewhere. And you want to fall for it abi.

In your own words, your husband is a good man, doesn't cheat, meets up his responsibilities. What else do you want biko.
How many men don't cheat, even pastors. Many of them cheat, here you have a good man, just a little moment of anger and you are here saying jargons.

Even Moses the meekest man by God's standard got angry and hit the rock multiple times.

When he starts his 1 minute madness, just say sweet heart, I am sorry please, then enter one room or just leave where he is at that moment.
But your ego will not allow you to.
When he talks, you must give it back to him hot hot.
That's what you so, and that's why that his 1 minute madness moment is always a torture to you, because you also help add fuel to the burning fire. STOP IT.

Madam, you want us to beg you not to leave?
Las las it is your call. Your home , your life.

janejjjjj5000:
No, sir. We have not.

This is a good idea.

I just feel so tired and unmotivated to work on the marriage.

Okay then if you can't be percify leave your 14 years marriage you will be looking for one when your eyes are clear those children school fees will make you prostitute soon. I can't see any issues here that cannot be resolved.

Sorry to say, you have no concrete reason maybe na olosho dey hungry u.

Kobojunkie:
A vacation to go get stuffed with yet more delusions and lies?

ROFLMAO

It's people that wants to get stuffed that do. Others can just enjoy praise and worship and go back to the hostel to rest and gist. Life no hard.

I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.[/quote]


From your write up, it shows you're a confused woman who don't really know what's wrong with her.

You need to go for a serious deliverance.

Which man no dey shout for him household? Aunty dey look for excuse to chop prick outside.

Ebubu:


The oloriburuku men supporting her want to fück what do you expect


Women can truly never be pleased

Just do your best, so incase she’s the type who can never be pleased

You will have no regrets having done your best

that is it bro, the want to Bleep thereby subjecting themselves to bn manipulated.

They want to sound good and nice, mr will smith.

They shouldn't worry, we re waiting for them with another monikers asking us for help as they re bn treated in the language they understand by those women.

Me ooh, what i can not do for myself dont expect me to do it for u, if u cant cope abeg go ur papa house, before before na burden u be.

And if i should bring out any kobo from my pulse to create wealth for u just know that i would have gained 70% from the business before u gain 30,

Even the thirty u gained self, u should be thanking me for it cus the capital was sourced for by me, so what are we saying here sef

[quote author=janejjjjj5000 post=112173431]Thank you, sir.

I think I will go for counseling. He has told me he is willing to go for counseling. He is begging me not to end the marriage.

Madam, I have to log on because of you. you think this man does not love the kids, you think he does not love you? Definitely, you want to pattern your life after some people's destiny, then abandon your own destiny. I beg you, use this opportunity to remold your home. Also do not rubbish your husband in the presence of your kids. From your speech, the kids are somehow sympathetic with you and you think they are the only things you need. It is a lie. Today, I and my siblings adore our mother for how she endured some things in her marriage. Your husband now is an angel compared to my Dad. We have taken that woman to US, we have built her another house, she has a car now. This is somebody that my father collected his gratuity and my Mom could not raise capital for her petty business, my papa gave the gratuity to his sister. My Mama no talk o. I beg, forget, since their is no assault, try the counselling; and you too become a counsellor. After apologizing, lecture him. Be closer to him, show him more love. Do not paint him black. Do not support the opinion of your kids, even if they are true. Give him feedback from the kids with wisdom. God will teach you.

E be like say outside knack don de hungry you.

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

janejjjjj5000:
Thank you so much, sir.

Do you think the kids might be needing therapy too?

They cry when this happens. Especially the two oldest ones. The last two are twins and less than 2 so they don't know anything.

I am just so confused. I don't discuss my home with third parties so I just felt like coming here to vent because I feel I cannot cope alone any longer.

Maybe take a break away from him. You and the kids can go somewhere together for a week or two and leave him alone at home to unwind. Or maybe if you have the finances, treat him to a weekend at a hotel, with a trusted person at home taking care of the kids. He might be reacting to pressure or stress.

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.

/

Your husband scores A among husbands based on your assessment (which is rare by the way) and you are still complaining. If you have made up your mind to cheat on him, no need to seek for public validation before destroying your marriage. Cheating? Yes! I can translate women into English and evidently adultery is on your mind.

How will your husband rate you?

/

You are not serious.

Don't worry it's because of that guy that is waving penis at you and those damaged women deceiving you. He would soon get tired of you and the women will desert you. You will regret your decision but it would to late for you to do anything about it.

janejjjjj5000:
Please, I don't want to be judged. My husband is a good man. We have been married for 14 years. I am 33 years old. He is 39 years old. We have 4 kids - 3 girls and 1 boy. He has never cheated on me. Right from day 1, he has been very open. He is not the type of husband that locks phone and all of that. But I am tired. He has the habit of flaring up around the children and I don't like it. I don't want my kids to be damaged. I know some will say no marriage is perfect but at this point, I don't even want marriage again. I just want to be free and single and look after my kids. I am tired.

Anytime we have an argument, he always talks about how he did this and that for me. In front of the children. I don't want this kind of life. He hardly gets angry, maybe twice or thrice in a year but when he does, he does not have the sense to know he should not be doing it in front of the kids. He apologizes to them and to me but I am done.

He has no other issue apart from this. He has never beaten me or anything but I am tired. Overall he is a good husband to be fair and honest but I can no longer deal with this. I prefer to be single and free than deal with this rubbish.

I feel like pouring out my heart.