₦airaland Forum

Sweetplum:
I live in the air.

Are you in anyway related to the prince of the air... Ayam just asking

Acidbath:
Just have it at the back of your mind that the only thing women want from you are kids and money. Society forces them into marriage but these two things I have listed will keep them in.

The earlier you know this, the better. You are not that special.

True words of wisdom and this statement of yours is quite revelatory......

It makes sense because the vast majority of women opt for divorce or break up once money dries up or if they just want children but no husband - some women actually just want children but no husband so once children are born, they look for excuse and divorce....

Other girls and EVEN GUYS don't want marriage but their parents are forcing them...they get married and after a couple of years, they break up....

BabaIbo:
Marriage they say is a beautiful thing but if you ask many men out there what marriage is to them or what marriage has brought to them or will they get married if they are given chances to rewind time, their responses will be in negative form or NO.

That same step(marriage) is the next step to be taken by me but I have one unanswered question. I am a young man in my 30s, currently free from any dating relationship and about to begin my search for a life partner, but I like being cleared/well-informed about something before going into it.

Pardon me for this long note I am about to dish out and the question I will be asking at the end.

For sometimes now, people around me have been telling me I am next in line to get married, some telling me to ensure I bring a responsible lady home and all that.
My mom do tell me she won't rush me to get married but as an observant person you will notice she really wants me to bring a woman(wife) home.

My dad told me sometimes ago that if I don't have a lady, that maybe they should search for a young good girl for me early next year.
My younger ones are expecting me to take that step so they can start planning on theirs and all that.

All these are for their own good or benefits, I am not saying they don't deserve it but I have been trying to get a tangible reason to get married i.e what is the SPECIAL thing(benefit) it will add to my life, I am the one getting married not them.
"Na me wan wear the shoe."

A bikeman, popularly known as Okadaman that do come to my place told me story about himself and big opportunities that marriage has made him miss.

In addition to his words and those I have heard from others, the fear of things going south, disappearance of peace of mind and all that are other factors.

Presumed(anticipated) benefits which are not as they are expected to be again are)

CHILDREN: Children can be gotten without marriage, for example: C. Ronaldo, Mikel, and others did that and they are doing well.

GOOD MEALS: Foods can be gotten from outside or prepared by the man or any other person that is not a wife for the man. Moreover, how many of them can cook well like our mothers? I'm a better cook than most ladies I have come across.

COMPANIONSHIP: That is an overstatement in our present society. It is even more noticeable in dating relationship than in some marriages these days.

SEX: That is the cheapest service/thing to get after air and water(clean water is even more expensive). Moreover many marriages are lacking sexually. It is worse if the man has high sex drive aka high libido.

SUPPORT: I don't want to go there because it is an open fact that instead of getting support, the man is being leached/milked of the one he has.

HOME: I can still remember how some married men will pack their cars at the junction, stay inside their cars for long before driving home, some go to the bar/relaxation centers to chill before going home, some don even like going home. You all know why?

With all these in mind, I want to ask this question that has been bothering me because I need to sort it before taking the step...

Now, my question is "WHAT IS THE BENEFIT OF MARRIAGE TO A MAN IN THIS OUR TIME?"

PS: I used this image because what marriage did to the man in the picture is in the open

The reason you should marry is because of procreation and your wife is only person who will stand by you at your old age... Not even your children.

Sunnyski:
Are you in anyway related to the prince of the air... Ayam just asking

Na only me waka come Nigeria. I m here to enjoy and set things right.

mecussey:
LOL, you used C Ronaldo and mikel as examples, those two are married. When two come together to procreate, cohabit, with the consent of the parents, they become one and as matter of fact married. Africans took it extreme and made it look like marriage is expensive. Just get a babe, and procreate with her with the consent of her parents.

The problem we have is African marriage... If you want to avoid those problems you listed there, just get a girl and start living together. The benefits of having a woman by your side is the children and the children needs security. If you don't cohabit with a woman, the children will lack.

Note that forces beyond human understanding will worry you to go public with weddings and the nonsense, just block your ear until you achieve all your goals.

However, if you are not financially stable, do not marry/cohabit/procreate yet. E get why

Your input makes sense

Finding a woman woman to cohabit with, with the consent of her parents. Simple

MossLuv:
The reason you should marry is because of procreation and your wife is only person who will stand by you at your old age... Not even your children.

@ bolded that's assuming it is a good wife....if not, you are pretty much on your own....

Roseey0:
Companionship. Not these parasitic things people call relationship nowadays o. Real bond, ride or die, partner extraordinary both in crime and in good, Gossip partner, intellectual stimulator. When you get home you know you are HOME.

You just haven't met her. When you do, these things will maKe sense

A lot of Nigerians, both male and female, would be waiting till the cows come home for this ride-or-die-partner you just described.

Ballzproblemm:
Even with money there's still comma, how are you sure she ain't after your money,how are you sure after all the hustling na one broke guy the sample am , because she lacks attention, look at will Smith for example, doesn't he have enough money to feed him and his family for year's , yet his son friend August dey help am keep Jada. warm ,guy be wise no use this mentality ,money can't keep woman

The money is not for the woman, it's for giving the family a good standard so if she bleeps up her chance, we can get divorced in peace without my conscience at stake.

BabaIbo:
I am telling you, "More like I know this is not advantageous OR beneficial but lemme just do it anyway."


Are you saying other kids are not raised responsibly?
I mean kids in Mikel, Ronaldo, Techno, Patoranking etc kind of union.

Moreover, is it every kids in marriage that are responsible?

I once liked marriage but it was as a result of lack of experience, as I grow older I realized that it isn't really worth it so I can barely commit my life for a woman that surely ain't gat me

Sweetplum:
Na only me waka come Nigeria. I m here to enjoy and set things right.

Enjoy yourself wella and set right the things you can and for those that you cannot (marriage) you leave it.

Choose your man wisely don't cos there are boxers, cheaters skull miners and organ harvesters all over naija

If you find a virtuous woman marriage is blissful and sweet.
Marriage is designed to be enjoyed, not to be endured as it has turned out to be.
Both men and women of nowadays have a lot to learn from their parents on how to manage their lives in order to conform with that of the last generation of 80s.

nesgeeek:
marry only when u are ready and mature enough to bear and tolerate her character. But don't marry because of pressure from ur love ones and friends.
Personally, I don't see any benefit attached to it. u can get all u want without marriage.

True

BePrepared:
Your words are wise, when kids start having sex by the time marriage ought to be expected and enjoyed you hear these kinds of stuff.

I'm 31 I can't wait to be married, its like everything to me WHY?

I left off premarital sex and focused on building myself and now that I'm ready godly dating and marriage is exciting me.

so your main reason for marriage is sex, if that is the case , oga you don't know what marriage is about and your still reasoning like a kid.

BabaIbo:
Marriage they say is a beautiful thing but if you ask many men out there what marriage is to them or what marriage has brought to them or will they get married if they are given chances to rewind time, their responses will be in negative form or NO.

That same step(marriage) is the next step to be taken by me but I have one unanswered question. I am a young man in my 30s, currently free from any dating relationship and about to begin my search for a life partner, but I like being cleared/well-informed about something before going into it.

Pardon me for this long note I am about to dish out and the question I will be asking at the end.

For sometimes now, people around me have been telling me I am next in line to get married, some telling me to ensure I bring a responsible lady home and all that.
My mom do tell me she won't rush me to get married but as an observant person you will notice she really wants me to bring a woman(wife) home.

My dad told me sometimes ago that if I don't have a lady, that maybe they should search for a young good girl for me early next year.
My younger ones are expecting me to take that step so they can start planning on theirs and all that.

All these are for their own good or benefits, I am not saying they don't deserve it but I have been trying to get a tangible reason to get married i.e what is the SPECIAL thing(benefit) it will add to my life, I am the one getting married not them.
"Na me wan wear the shoe."

A bikeman, popularly known as Okadaman that do come to my place told me story about himself and big opportunities that marriage has made him miss.

In addition to his words and those I have heard from others, the fear of things going south, disappearance of peace of mind and all that are other factors.

Presumed(anticipated) benefits which are not as they are expected to be again are)

CHILDREN: Children can be gotten without marriage, for example: C. Ronaldo, Mikel, and others did that and they are doing well.

GOOD MEALS: Foods can be gotten from outside or prepared by the man or any other person that is not a wife for the man. Moreover, how many of them can cook well like our mothers? I'm a better cook than most ladies I have come across.

COMPANIONSHIP: That is an overstatement in our present society. It is even more noticeable in dating relationship than in some marriages these days.

SEX: That is the cheapest service/thing to get after air and water(clean water is even more expensive). Moreover many marriages are lacking sexually. It is worse if the man has high sex drive aka high libido.

SUPPORT: I don't want to go there because it is an open fact that instead of getting support, the man is being leached/milked of the one he has.

HOME: I can still remember how some married men will pack their cars at the junction, stay inside their cars for long before driving home, some go to the bar/relaxation centers to chill before going home, some don even like going home. You all know why?

With all these in mind, I want to ask this question that has been bothering me because I need to sort it before taking the step...

Now, my question is "WHAT IS THE BENEFIT OF MARRIAGE TO A MAN IN THIS OUR TIME?"

PS: I used this image because what marriage did to the man in the picture is in the open

Since you are obviously against marriage, why are you here trying to justify your decison? You owe no one any explanation. You've decided, with reasons, why it is not attractive to you. Then own your choice. Simple.

The only benefit is children. Nothing else. Your wife is not only for you, your money is not only for you, your time is not only for you, your days are not only for you. Nothing is yours but your children

Sweetplum:
Apostle Paul that you mentioned also told we women to be submissive to our husbands. This same Paul also said you men should love your wives very well. This is in Ephesians 5:22-33.
So... bros this is about logic. No be do or die. Marriage isn't by force. Let no unfortunate never do well boy come n derail the minds of sane people.
The Goddess has spoken.

Let's do a little bible study


Let's k

BabaIbo:
Sure, I do and that is why I asked this question here...

Just exploring every option before finally taking the step.

Thank you!

OK that's nice
I wish you luck as you search

cococandy:
that OP will certainly not benefit from marriage. So no need for him to try

Oh, this explains it better.
We get your point now.

Some words are better left unsaid more like....

All these under the extreme poverty in the land?
Oga come again.

Nazgul:
Marriage became useless to men because we abandoned our culture and tradition and embraced that of the Western world.

When you start sleeping with girls from the age of 16 and have a body count of close to 50 girls by the time you're 30, what usefulness do you expect to get from marriage? Truth is even you the man wouldn't value the marriage and would immediately resume your sexcapade after your honeymoon

The only way to restore decorum in African marriages is to embrace back our culture.

Pre marital sex must be seen as an abomination, those who practice it would be banished from their community.

Virginity test should be one of the requirements a girl must possess before marriage can take place, this will reduce promiscuity in girls.

A law should be passed that ràpists would earn in instant death sentence upon conviction. This would reduce promiscuity in guys cos no one would be willing to risk his life for a few minutes of pleasure.

Also there should be laws governing marriages that would make unfaithful partners risk jail term.

Once this measures can be put in place, I strongly believe that marriages would become as rosy as it was meant to be. And wouldn't be useless to both men and women.

BabaIbo:
Marriage they say is a beautiful thing but if you ask many men out there what marriage is to them or what marriage has brought to them or will they get married if they are given chances to rewind time, their responses will be in negative form or NO.

That same step(marriage) is the next step to be taken by me but I have one unanswered question. I am a young man in my 30s, currently free from any dating relationship and about to begin my search for a life partner, but I like being cleared/well-informed about something before going into it.

Pardon me for this long note I am about to dish out and the question I will be asking at the end.

For sometimes now, people around me have been telling me I am next in line to get married, some telling me to ensure I bring a responsible lady home and all that.
My mom do tell me she won't rush me to get married but as an observant person you will notice she really wants me to bring a woman(wife) home.

My dad told me sometimes ago that if I don't have a lady, that maybe they should search for a young good girl for me early next year.
My younger ones are expecting me to take that step so they can start planning on theirs and all that.

All these are for their own good or benefits, I am not saying they don't deserve it but I have been trying to get a tangible reason to get married i.e what is the SPECIAL thing(benefit) it will add to my life, I am the one getting married not them.
"Na me wan wear the shoe."

A bikeman, popularly known as Okadaman that do come to my place told me story about himself and big opportunities that marriage has made him miss.

In addition to his words and those I have heard from others, the fear of things going south, disappearance of peace of mind and all that are other factors.

Presumed(anticipated) benefits which are not as they are expected to be again are)

CHILDREN: Children can be gotten without marriage, for example: C. Ronaldo, Mikel, and others did that and they are doing well.

GOOD MEALS: Foods can be gotten from outside or prepared by the man or any other person that is not a wife for the man. Moreover, how many of them can cook well like our mothers? I'm a better cook than most ladies I have come across.

COMPANIONSHIP: That is an overstatement in our present society. It is even more noticeable in dating relationship than in some marriages these days.

SEX: That is the cheapest service/thing to get after air and water(clean water is even more expensive). Moreover many marriages are lacking sexually. It is worse if the man has high sex drive aka high libido.

SUPPORT: I don't want to go there because it is an open fact that instead of getting support, the man is being leached/milked of the one he has.

HOME: I can still remember how some married men will pack their cars at the junction, stay inside their cars for long before driving home, some go to the bar/relaxation centers to chill before going home, some don even like going home. You all know why?

With all these in mind, I want to ask this question that has been bothering me because I need to sort it before taking the step...

Now, my question is "WHAT IS THE BENEFIT OF MARRIAGE TO A MAN IN THIS OUR TIME?"

PS: I used this image because what marriage did to the man in the picture is in the open

When you're smart, you may not get married. Sincerely speaking, absolutely nothing. If you're rich, even your wife younger ones can arrange for your assassination in today's world. Stay smart, and pray to get a Prenuptial wife

Marriage is beyond sex and procreation. However, a world that does not see beyond the physical will not acknowledge this.

Nazgul:
Marriage became useless to men because we abandoned our culture and tradition and embraced that of the Western world.

When you start sleeping with girls from the age of 16 and have a body count of close to 50 girls by the time you're 30, what usefulness do you expect to get from marriage? Truth is even you the man wouldn't value the marriage and would immediately resume your sexcapade after your honeymoon

The only way to restore decorum in African marriages is to embrace back our culture.

Pre marital sex must be seen as an abomination, those who practice it would be banished from their community.

Virginity test should be one of the requirements a girl must possess before marriage can take place, this will reduce promiscuity in girls.

A law should be passed that ràpists would earn in instant death sentence upon conviction. This would reduce promiscuity in guys cos no one would be willing to risk his life for a few minutes of pleasure.

Also there should be laws governing marriages that would make unfaithful partners risk jail term.

Once this measures can be put in place, I strongly believe that marriages would become as rosy as it was meant to be. And wouldn't be useless to both men and women.

Woke people can't even comprehend what is coming.....the modern men have failed the world.


On fox new just this morning.....there is a new right agitation combine with this abortion right protests term menstrual dignity

Very soon the woke society will be slave to communist and patriarchal societies..... because every woke society is getting tired of everything and all things that make life meaningful including innovations, invention and cultural value that have sustained moral, accountability, discipline and uprightness....even been your brother's keeper is now a dump things to do....by the woke ideology

The other day, there was a news of a Canada born Ukrainian soldier that surrendered to the Russian troops with the excuse of short supplies of food.....I was shocked the extend of how weak brave men have become.......just imagine a Nigerian soldier surrendered to the BH on the basis of food

He who findeth a wife findeth a good thing and obtaineth favor from the lord

Sweetplum:
Companionship & Procreation.
Go n read Genesis to know more.
To all who are quoting me. Marriage isn't by force. Don't discourage those who value it.
I wonder how you all train those kids you had anyhow via baby mamas or surrogacy.
What's the value you instill in them. One of. Thee things destroying the world of today is lack of value. And its first gotten from homes.
So who are you all fooling?
I m coming with full force!
Last Drop:

Either you all cooperate jejely or stay out of marriage.

Abeg e. Values ke! And a woman will nag me? My peace of mind first before any values that will be instilled on offspring. Last last life is per head no matter how you see it. Everyone will fight on their own at some point. Shikena!

Marriage is a bag of everything, good, bad ugly. Once you carrry it consciously, just deal with it until you drop it or it drop you.
Sanni Abiola

Kingcalls:
Women should be the ones on one knee begging men to marry them... marriage is the most expensive engagement for many man... cos he's expected to foot all bills...from wedding to house rent to transportation to feeding to hospital bills to school fees and clothing.... but still women will still have the audacity to insult and disrespect these men that are usually older than them... Still women are more celebrated than men

Na the definition of marriage you simply quoted here ...

ExcelDBM:
Abeg e. Values ke! And a woman will nag me? My peace of mind first before any values that will be instilled on offspring. Last last life is per head no matter how you see it. Everyone will fight on their own at some point. Shikena!

Whatever rocks your boat.
But if I handle you, it's either you cooperate or else?

EndyAkakwa:
Same question i keep asking people..
Why do we live to die later...?
What is the essence od all these stress, when we still gonna die

It's just not clear. To even add the fact that anyone can die anytime no matter how good one is, makes it more annoying. It's well, make we just dey flow dey go.

@peggywebbs.. You've said nothing but the truth. I just love you for these...

For those saying there's no benefit in marriage. Go ask ask your parents that question.
When u reach old age u go knw d meaning of companionship

pappilo:
Bro whatever you do, do not, I repeat, do not get married! You will always regret it. I love my late dad, he was the best dad anyone could ask for but if I see him in the afterlife, I will ask him why he never told me the truth about marriage and advise me no to get married.

Love someone (with sense), have children, live together but never ever sign your life away. Finally do not let any woman you are with know everything about you.

The first thing that deteriorates after marriage is your sex life. I think its a psychological thing. Maybe the subconscious feeling that you've both got each other for 'life' messes with the brain.

I was married for 14 years. My ex-wife started a relationship with a work colleague and a month after using the police to kick me out of my house, the dude left his own family and moved into my house.

I was charged with several offences for an altercation I had with the guy when I caught him in my house. My ex-wife (we were still married at the time) the mother of my children came to the crown court to testify against me on his behalf. The jury saw through their lies and determination to send me to prison and acquited me on all charges (over 5)

Its been a few years but I still shudder at the thought that I believed so much in this woman and chose her over my own siblings.

Attached is msg I got from her this morning. This is despite her taking the house which I put
down 66% of the deposit. This woman earns almost double what I earn and I pay her over a quarter of my net earnings for child maintenance.

You'll probably still go ahead and get married but its almost guaranteed that one day in the future you will look back and wish you heeded the advice of many people who told you not to

Blood of Jesus.
I no get talk for mouth I swear guy you need 5minutes hug from a friend, how are you still sane?

Sweetplum:
Whatever rocks your boat.
But if I handle you, it's either you cooperate or else?

Handle me how