Not The Marriage I Had In Mind - Family (9)

Not The Marriage I Had In Mind - Family (9) - Nairaland

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Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by okunwaye(m): 4:44pm On May 22, 2022

FERNANDEZISBACK:
You wouldn't quote me if you was..

you are not matured

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Kingcalls: 4:55pm On May 22, 2022

FERNANDEZISBACK:
Thanks for the compliment..

U are highly welcome

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by AjiBussu(m): 5:04pm On May 22, 2022

Ble*p him up

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by DrDunamis(m): 5:15pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
I had to open a new moniker so I can rant in peace. My head is full, so it's going to be a long post .

I got married to the love of my life 2017 (we started dating 2009) and we have two wonderful children.
He loves me (I know for sure), doesn't cheat too and my in-laws are the most wonderful people on earth ( my mil especially).

We have a joint business but the bad part :he is addicted to alcohol.

He wasn't like this before we got married, he used to drink occasionally so I can't really tell how we got here.

It's so bad that he can't go a day without it. Once he can't lay his hands on alcohol he will begin to shiver like a malaria patient.

This addiction has gotten us into debts that I had to pay with my savings on several occasions.

I'm talking of debts of 120k, 167k, 136k e.t.c. He's takes several loans from loan sharks , drinks like no tomorrow.

He has wrecked ourbbusiness and only with the help of God was I able to rebuild It by taking loans and paying back.

We even decided he gets a job so he can be more responsible but after working for a year he had nothing to show for it.

Twice his parents had to take him to a therapist but it was all in vain as he would go back to drinking.

My head is scattered,I can't think straight, it's making me hate him. I tried leaving a few weeks ago , I went back to my mother's house but trust my mama, she begged me to go back and my mother in-law too.

I don't even know what to do, my mental life is zero, I have withdrawn from everyone, I'm practically in poverty due to this addiction
He is a wonderful man BUT this addiction is a very big problem. We have prayed, fasted, gone to doctors but it's still there.

I don't know what to do .

Do what that Brazilian woman did with her husband.
When he is drunk, get ambulance to take him to the mortuary and have him sleep there and let the mortuary attendant play along that he's dead when he wakes up. And see the transformation.
Is it just an addiction or he's trying to drink away something?
The money he's borrowing are you signing with him too? So why must it be you to pay up?

1 Like

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Jaqenhghar: 5:37pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
I had to open a new moniker so I can rant in peace. My head is full, so it's going to be a long post .

I got married to the love of my life 2017 (we started dating 2009) and we have two wonderful children.
He loves me (I know for sure), doesn't cheat too and my in-laws are the most wonderful people on earth ( my mil especially).

We have a joint business but the bad part :he is addicted to alcohol.

He wasn't like this before we got married, he used to drink occasionally so I can't really tell how we got here.

It's so bad that he can't go a day without it. Once he can't lay his hands on alcohol he will begin to shiver like a malaria patient.

This addiction has gotten us into debts that I had to pay with my savings on several occasions.

I'm talking of debts of 120k, 167k, 136k e.t.c. He's takes several loans from loan sharks , drinks like no tomorrow.

He has wrecked ourbbusiness and only with the help of God was I able to rebuild It by taking loans and paying back.

We even decided he gets a job so he can be more responsible but after working for a year he had nothing to show for it.

Twice his parents had to take him to a therapist but it was all in vain as he would go back to drinking.

My head is scattered,I can't think straight, it's making me hate him. I tried leaving a few weeks ago , I went back to my mother's house but trust my mama, she begged me to go back and my mother in-law too.

I don't even know what to do, my mental life is zero, I have withdrawn from everyone, I'm practically in poverty due to this addiction
He is a wonderful man BUT this addiction is a very big problem. We have prayed, fasted, gone to doctors but it's still there.

I don't know what to do .

Seek professional help. Sounds like an alcoholic. Sad

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by writeprof(m): 5:38pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
On several occasions I have asked maybe it's something I am doing wrong or not doing at all but he keeps saying it's not me it is him. God knows I have tried my best to be a good partner/wife. I have no other excuse to leave aside from his addiction. Won't it be that I am leaving him because of a problem.
For the first time in 5 years I spoke to my mom about this(I didn't want any member of my family to know so they won't loose respect for him as I was really hopeful he would change), But i can't talk to her about it again, she would only ask me to pray that's why I am here on nairaland. I just want to hear other people's opinion and make the best decision especially for my children

It's well with your home Ma. Are you a committed believer? If yes, thank God, you will come out victorious. If no, rededicate your life to God the one who instituted marriage.

I believe you want your home back that's why you are here. I will suggest that you find time and go for a 2 weeks retreat with your husband in a quiet and peaceful spiritual environment. It's not a fasting programme but a time to pray while you also relax.

I will suggest a place like the Redemption City of God (formerly Redemption Camp) or better still for its serenity, the Mount Carmel Prayer mountain at Ifewara, few minutes drive from Ile- Ife.
Don't give up on your marriage. God bless you.

2 Likes

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by pharmaking: 5:45pm On May 22, 2022

I had a family friend ( my father's age grade) some years ago.

He was doing well at work until the addiction became worse.

His wife and daughters would hide alcohol he brought home, yet he would search and locate them.
He was fired from work.

On many occasions, he boarded bikes to come to joints and look for alcohol with just boxer short on, I mean shirtless.

The wife stayed of course, u know our mothers, she was determined to raise her kids and make them useful in life.

Someone said they used his hobby (that is drinking) to destroy him, village people side of the matter.

Today, he is very dead.The children are settled and doing well.

I don't know what to tell u, but if u are staying, that road is promisingly rough, make I no lie u.

I met that man myself one afternoon walking aimlessly and shirtless.So when my friends said they sighted him shirtless, I believed them.

If u are staying, u need to be ready to spiritually fight it.

Kai, I wish you well o.Your kind of woman is not common again.

What I read hear every time is women giving their husbands ache.

Rarely see the one that wants to make marriage work.

God will strengthen you madam.

2 Likes

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by ivanoj(m): 5:53pm On May 22, 2022

goodeveing, the problem with your husband demands collective solution, if he is the best man as you claimed leaving the marriage will not be the way out. unless you are leaving to stay alone without having anything to do with sex. if you know you can do that no problem. you can not get somebody that will give you true love like your husband but what you will always get is sexmate and let it be clear your responsibility will increase because you have to fend for the children and house bills and utility yourself. Men outside will only pay for sex offering services and not taking your responsibility as their own. (image the comments and remarks of single mothers on nairaland)

MY ADVICE
kindly involve your mother in law and your mother to seek spiritual healings because it is not your husband doing if he always come to apologies. He needs total deliverance. The devil really wants to make you miserable and he picks his fight using your husband. By the time he finishes with you, you will be in your thirties looking sixty. This is the time your marraige was been tested, do not give up and make it stand.

shalom.

2 Likes

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Sterope(f): 5:53pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife

You can't force treatment. It is a decision he will need to make for himself. No one can make him change. It is his choice to make.

Your responsibility is to support him but at what cost? Your financial stability? Influence on your kids because you can't say until they are older if they are going to turn out like him or sit up and want different? Your future?

It is your decision to make.

Kobojunkie:
Your husband has an addiction problem and you have to have him checked into rehab so he can get treatment he needs for his addiction?

No amount of starvation-dieting, what you all call fasting, will fix your husband or your marriage. Alcohol addiction is a behavioral problem which indicates a mental illness so send him to get treatment for what ails him while you work towards getting your own mental healed.

1 Like

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Sterope(f): 5:58pm On May 22, 2022

Her decision to stay doesn't make her a better woman than the women that left.

Frankly, she is not doing her children any good. This is the point she will have to choose herself and her kids or her marriage.

pharmaking:
I had a family friend ( my father's age grade) some years ago.

He was doing well at work until the addiction became worse.

His wife and daughters would hide alcohol he brought home, yet he would search and locate them.
He was fired from work.

On many occasions, he boarded bikes to come to joints and look for alcohol with just boxer short on, I mean shirtless.

The wife stayed of course, u know our mothers, she was determined to raise her kids and make them useful in life.

Someone said they used his hobby (that is drinking) to destroy him, village people side of the matter.

Today, he is very dead.The children are settled and doing well.

I don't know what to tell u, but if u are staying, that road is promisingly rough, make I no lie u.

I met that man myself one afternoon walking aimlessly and shirtless.So when my friends said they sighted him shirtless, I believed them.

If u are staying, u need to be ready to spiritually fight it.

Kai, I wish you well o.Your kind of woman is not common again.

What I read hear every time is women giving their husbands ache.

Rarely see the one that wants to make marriage work.

God will strengthen you madam.

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by pocohantas(f): 6:03pm On May 22, 2022

kazyhm:
When a husband is having issues, fellow women advice dissolution of the marriage

When the table is on the opposite side, men advice the man should manup and take responsibility.

Marriage is a progressive work....not a destination.

Indeed. The lies we tell ourselves to feel better.

Mindlog:
Growing up, you never saw men who were drunks?

It seems you have never visited rehabilitation centres in psychiatric facilities in Nigeria and in some African countries, to see the reality on ground or even stand alone rehabilitation centres.

They lie too much. The one above even claimed Nigerian men advise themselves to man-up to wives like this. grin

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by FERNANDEZISBACK: 6:03pm On May 22, 2022

okunwaye:
you are not matured

You are not matured... cheesy

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Zinpat: 6:03pm On May 22, 2022

I think filing for divorce will make him come back 2 his senses

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by pocohantas(f): 6:08pm On May 22, 2022

yommyoke:
I'll say no to this your assertion, you hardly see niggas telling another nigga to man up when it comes to marriage problems anymore, it's all "safety first" now.
No one should advise this woman to continue with this deadly adventure, she should end the marriage asap if changes can't be made.
Imagine a man wrecking a business jointly built from scratch, that man must be so useless.
Divorce the idiot, you can consider your love for him later, but consider your children's future first if you already have them.

Don’t mind the chronic liar. When did Nigerian men start advising themselves to put up with such? For this Nairaland abi where?

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by pocohantas(f): 6:09pm On May 22, 2022

kazyhm:
[s]It is not common that a man advice other men to divorce/breakup with their wives/galfriend over trivial issues...... especially when her good side outweigh the bad sides.....

Do your survey..... husband/boyfriend on average help the person they love out of severe situations than this....men spend fortune to educates, elevate, care and cure terminal diseases/ailments of their wives/galfriend and it won't even ever become a topic.[/s]

Stop telling lies, Oga.

1 Like

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by tonyashburton: 6:19pm On May 22, 2022

Maybe find out why he resorts to alcohol.There must be some deep seated issue or issues in his life that he tries to take his mind off when he drinks.
Have a heart to heart conversation first.

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by nizelgirl(f): 6:20pm On May 22, 2022

Op. I'm kind of busy right now so I don't have time for lengthy post. Search for PROPHETIC PRAYER HOUR ON FACEBOOK OR YOUTUBE WITH REV SAM. And try to connect every morning from 5:50am- 7am. I strongly believe God will use the PPH tribe platform to change your story for good.

2 Likes

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by femshadrach(m): 6:23pm On May 22, 2022

With all seriousness and been mindful of my words....... Give him Gutter water to drink when he is drunk again I bet it with you he won't tried that again....... And thank God later for the revelation.... Save my username on nairaland

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Boomboost(m): 6:28pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
I had to open a new moniker so I can rant in peace. My head is full, so it's going to be a long post .

I got married to the love of my life 2017 (we started dating 2009) and we have two wonderful children.
He loves me (I know for sure), doesn't cheat too and my in-laws are the most wonderful people on earth ( my mil especially).

We have a joint business but the bad part :he is addicted to alcohol.

He wasn't like this before we got married, he used to drink occasionally so I can't really tell how we got here.

It's so bad that he can't go a day without it. Once he can't lay his hands on alcohol he will begin to shiver like a malaria patient.

This addiction has gotten us into debts that I had to pay with my savings on several occasions.

I'm talking of debts of 120k, 167k, 136k e.t.c. He's takes several loans from loan sharks , drinks like no tomorrow.

He has wrecked ourbbusiness and only with the help of God was I able to rebuild It by taking loans and paying back.

We even decided he gets a job so he can be more responsible but after working for a year he had nothing to show for it.

Twice his parents had to take him to a therapist but it was all in vain as he would go back to drinking.

My head is scattered,I can't think straight, it's making me hate him. I tried leaving a few weeks ago , I went back to my mother's house but trust my mama, she begged me to go back and my mother in-law too.

I don't even know what to do, my mental life is zero, I have withdrawn from everyone, I'm practically in poverty due to this addiction
He is a wonderful man BUT this addiction is a very big problem. We have prayed, fasted, gone to doctors but it's still there.

I don't know what to do .

Think, there must be something to replace his alcohol addiction with.

You can show him summarised material on Bacchus and how the demon works.

Use reverse psychology and tell him what a wonderful non-alcoholic he is, and give him a gift if he skips drinking even for one day.

Act the part of a playful girlfriend, you'll do what women do best (manipulate) and reduce his addiction.

At the time he would go out drinking, divert his attention to something else like a short game like the ones on tiktok, an evening date, roleplay session, movie night or enjoying comedy videos or even drink with him from a flat plate (at home).

Talk about his passion and strengths and the good ol'days and don't bring in the alcohol part.

When he has to go drink, tell him to bring some alcohol back for you. That way, he'll consume less bottles.

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by stacyadams: 6:43pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
I had to open a new moniker so I can rant in peace. My head is full, so it's going to be a long post .

I got married to the love of my life 2017 (we started dating 2009) and we have two wonderful children.
He loves me (I know for sure), doesn't cheat too and my in-laws are the most wonderful people on earth ( my mil especially).

Ten K will solve d problem..sha hope he don't beat u

We have a joint business but the bad part :he is addicted to alcohol.

He wasn't like this before we got married, he used to drink occasionally so I can't really tell how we got here.

It's so bad that he can't go a day without it. Once he can't lay his hands on alcohol he will begin to shiver like a malaria patient.

This addiction has gotten us into debts that I had to pay with my savings on several occasions.

I'm talking of debts of 120k, 167k, 136k e.t.c. He's takes several loans from loan sharks , drinks like no tomorrow.

He has wrecked ourbbusiness and only with the help of God was I able to rebuild It by taking loans and paying back.

We even decided he gets a job so he can be more responsible but after working for a year he had nothing to show for it.

Twice his parents had to take him to a therapist but it was all in vain as he would go back to drinking.

My head is scattered,I can't think straight, it's making me hate him. I tried leaving a few weeks ago , I went back to my mother's house but trust my mama, she begged me to go back and my mother in-law too.

I don't even know what to do, my mental life is zero, I have withdrawn from everyone, I'm practically in poverty due to this addiction
He is a wonderful man BUT this addiction is a very big problem. We have prayed, fasted, gone to doctors but it's still there.

I don't know what to do .

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by okenwa101(m): 6:46pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
On several occasions I have asked maybe it's something I am doing wrong or not doing at all but he keeps saying it's not me it is him. God knows I have tried my best to be a good partner/wife. I have no other excuse to leave aside from his addiction. Won't it be that I am leaving him because of a problem.
For the first time in 5 years I spoke to my mom about this(I didn't want any member of my family to know so they won't loose respect for him as I was really hopeful he would change), But i can't talk to her about it again, she would only ask me to pray that's why I am here on nairaland. I just want to hear other people's opinion and make the best decision especially for my children

Madam you are a good woman and nothing will happen to you, your husband needs you now, do NOT listen to all these divorce advice, because you never mentioned him being violence and he never blame you for his predicament. What you and family should do it to admit him at a therapist ward for atleast 3months with close monitoring he will forget alcohol, play to God too, it could be diabolical as some people do not like how peaceful you both are living. My advice you

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by komek(m): 6:49pm On May 22, 2022

FERNANDEZISBACK:
Not here to please anybody..

See your head grin

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by phemmyfour: 6:49pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
I had to open a new moniker so I can rant in peace. My head is full, so it's going to be a long post .

I got married to the love of my life 2017 (we started dating 2009) and we have two wonderful children.
He loves me (I know for sure), doesn't cheat too and my in-laws are the most wonderful people on earth ( my mil especially).

We have a joint business but the bad part :he is addicted to alcohol.

He wasn't like this before we got married, he used to drink occasionally so I can't really tell how we got here.

It's so bad that he can't go a day without it. Once he can't lay his hands on alcohol he will begin to shiver like a malaria patient.

This addiction has gotten us into debts that I had to pay with my savings on several occasions.

I'm talking of debts of 120k, 167k, 136k e.t.c. He's takes several loans from loan sharks , drinks like no tomorrow.

He has wrecked ourbbusiness and only with the help of God was I able to rebuild It by taking loans and paying back.

We even decided he gets a job so he can be more responsible but after working for a year he had nothing to show for it.

Twice his parents had to take him to a therapist but it was all in vain as he would go back to drinking.

My head is scattered,I can't think straight, it's making me hate him. I tried leaving a few weeks ago , I went back to my mother's house but trust my mama, she begged me to go back and my mother in-law too.

I don't even know what to do, my mental life is zero, I have withdrawn from everyone, I'm practically in poverty due to this addiction
He is a wonderful man BUT this addiction is a very big problem. We have prayed, fasted, gone to doctors but it's still there.

I don't know what to do .

For now, anything money wise should be handle by you.
He needs to see as many psychologist/therapist as possible

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by LordIsaac(m): 6:49pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
I had to open a new moniker so I can rant in peace. My head is full, so it's going to be a long post .

I got married to the love of my life 2017 (we started dating 2009) and we have two wonderful children.
He loves me (I know for sure), doesn't cheat too and my in-laws are the most wonderful people on earth ( my mil especially).

We have a joint business but the bad part :he is addicted to alcohol.

He wasn't like this before we got married, he used to drink occasionally so I can't really tell how we got here.

It's so bad that he can't go a day without it. Once he can't lay his hands on alcohol he will begin to shiver like a malaria patient.

This addiction has gotten us into debts that I had to pay with my savings on several occasions.

I'm talking of debts of 120k, 167k, 136k e.t.c. He's takes several loans from loan sharks , drinks like no tomorrow.

He has wrecked ourbbusiness and only with the help of God was I able to rebuild It by taking loans and paying back.

We even decided he gets a job so he can be more responsible but after working for a year he had nothing to show for it.

Twice his parents had to take him to a therapist but it was all in vain as he would go back to drinking.

My head is scattered,I can't think straight, it's making me hate him. I tried leaving a few weeks ago , I went back to my mother's house but trust my mama, she begged me to go back and my mother in-law too.

I don't even know what to do, my mental life is zero, I have withdrawn from everyone, I'm practically in poverty due to this addiction
He is a wonderful man BUT this addiction is a very big problem. We have prayed, fasted, gone to doctors but it's still there.

I don't know what to do .

Tell him to google hepatocellular carcinoma...he wants to be a terrible liability to you and himself in no distant time.

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by voizofone: 7:14pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
I had to open a new moniker so I can rant in peace. My head is full, so it's going to be a long post .

I got married to the love of my life 2017 (we started dating 2009) and we have two wonderful children.
He loves me (I know for sure), doesn't cheat too and my in-laws are the most wonderful people on earth ( my mil especially).

We have a joint business but the bad part :he is addicted to alcohol.

He wasn't like this before we got married, he used to drink occasionally so I can't really tell how we got here.

It's so bad that he can't go a day without it. Once he can't lay his hands on alcohol he will begin to shiver like a malaria patient.

This addiction has gotten us into debts that I had to pay with my savings on several occasions.

I'm talking of debts of 120k, 167k, 136k e.t.c. He's takes several loans from loan sharks , drinks like no tomorrow.

He has wrecked ourbbusiness and only with the help of God was I able to rebuild It by taking loans and paying back.

We even decided he gets a job so he can be more responsible but after working for a year he had nothing to show for it.

Twice his parents had to take him to a therapist but it was all in vain as he would go back to drinking.

My head is scattered,I can't think straight, it's making me hate him. I tried leaving a few weeks ago , I went back to my mother's house but trust my mama, she begged me to go back and my mother in-law too.

I don't even know what to do, my mental life is zero, I have withdrawn from everyone, I'm practically in poverty due to this addiction
He is a wonderful man BUT this addiction is a very big problem. We have prayed, fasted, gone to doctors but it's still there.

I don't know what to do .

One of his village people or jilted lover don swear for him mata

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Imustreturn(m): 7:34pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
I had to open a new moniker so I can rant in peace. My head is full, so it's going to be a long post .

I got married to the love of my life 2017 (we started dating 2009) and we have two wonderful children.
He loves me (I know for sure), doesn't cheat too and my in-laws are the most wonderful people on earth ( my mil especially).

We have a joint business but the bad part :he is addicted to alcohol.

He wasn't like this before we got married, he used to drink occasionally so I can't really tell how we got here.

It's so bad that he can't go a day without it. Once he can't lay his hands on alcohol he will begin to shiver like a malaria patient.

This addiction has gotten us into debts that I had to pay with my savings on several occasions.

I'm talking of debts of 120k, 167k, 136k e.t.c. He's takes several loans from loan sharks , drinks like no tomorrow.

He has wrecked ourbbusiness and only with the help of God was I able to rebuild It by taking loans and paying back.

We even decided he gets a job so he can be more responsible but after working for a year he had nothing to show for it.

Twice his parents had to take him to a therapist but it was all in vain as he would go back to drinking.

My head is scattered,I can't think straight, it's making me hate him. I tried leaving a few weeks ago , I went back to my mother's house but trust my mama, she begged me to go back and my mother in-law too.

I don't even know what to do, my mental life is zero, I have withdrawn from everyone, I'm practically in poverty due to this addiction
He is a wonderful man BUT this addiction is a very big problem. We have prayed, fasted, gone to doctors but it's still there.

I don't know what to do .

sorry to say but it's spiritual. It's not fasting thing oh. Make una Waka for him head.

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Nobody: 7:36pm On May 22, 2022*

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by blair01(f): 7:41pm On May 22, 2022

Augustwife:
I had to open a new moniker so I can rant in peace. My head is full, so it's going to be a long post .

I got married to the love of my life 2017 (we started dating 2009) and we have two wonderful children.
He loves me (I know for sure), doesn't cheat too and my in-laws are the most wonderful people on earth ( my mil especially).

We have a joint business but the bad part :he is addicted to alcohol.

He wasn't like this before we got married, he used to drink occasionally so I can't really tell how we got here.

It's so bad that he can't go a day without it. Once he can't lay his hands on alcohol he will begin to shiver like a malaria patient.

This addiction has gotten us into debts that I had to pay with my savings on several occasions.

I'm talking of debts of 120k, 167k, 136k e.t.c. He's takes several loans from loan sharks , drinks like no tomorrow.

He has wrecked ourbbusiness and only with the help of God was I able to rebuild It by taking loans and paying back.

We even decided he gets a job so he can be more responsible but after working for a year he had nothing to show for it.

Twice his parents had to take him to a therapist but it was all in vain as he would go back to drinking.

My head is scattered,I can't think straight, it's making me hate him. I tried leaving a few weeks ago , I went back to my mother's house but trust my mama, she begged me to go back and my mother in-law too.

I don't even know what to do, my mental life is zero, I have withdrawn from everyone, I'm practically in poverty due to this addiction
He is a wonderful man BUT this addiction is a very big problem. We have prayed, fasted, gone to doctors but it's still there.

I don't know what to do .

My candid advice to u,pls take him to d mortuary when his drunk.Arrange with the attendants,when he wakes up with corpse
He will never try it again.Try this and thank me later.

1 Like

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Iretii0511(m): 8:15pm On May 22, 2022

Klass99:
Oh really? And here I was thinking before it became a mental health issue, that personal and poor choices led to that. It's just like saying it is a spiritual issue like I saw one poster say.

Why is it so difficult for us humans to accept that our poor choices (repeatedly made over and over again) actually lead to a downward spiral in life and a path paved with other painful issues? It is not a spiritual attack or mental incapacitation, it is simply bad decisions.

I am not an expert on alcoholism and I do not claim to know it all. But seriously, before it gets to the point of being a mental health disease, what gives rise to that? Poor life choices!!!

Klass99:
In sickness and health - yes. Because no one intentionally decides to be in poor health

So do you now see that even our poor health could be cause by choices we made? There are lots of sicknesses that's caused by the decisions we made or the lifestyle we live/used to live.

Meanwhile, at one point or the other, we make poor life choices, the consequences of which varies and in different degrees. Should we now throw the child away with the bath water? One of the essence of relationships/marriage is to help each other overcome some of the consequences of our yesteryears poor choices. It's hard, but if we claim to love a person, it's not too much to stick around and help them overcome their problems.

Do you honestly think if she leaves him instead of helping him overcome it by all means, the next person she gets involved with will be better? Or the next person won't have an issue that may even be worse than alcoholism?

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by MtDave55: 8:35pm On May 22, 2022

I don't know his personal effort in trying to quit drinking[color=#000099][/color] I know addiction is a very serious thing and it take deliverance to stop

Pls for the sake of the kids and your in-laws who have been good to you don't divorce him, but for the sake of your mental health you can give him some space, discuss it with your parents let they know why you need the separation and keep praying for his Deliverance

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Sunshine34(m): 8:37pm On May 22, 2022

Maybe he's from kogi or Benue
Those ones are addicted.
I have a friend like that too. Very annoying

Re: Not The Marriage I Had In Mind by Nobody: 8:46pm On May 22, 2022*

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