₦airaland Forum

Simp
Some guys sha. You never marry her, you dey monitor her like monitoring spirit.
If you come marry her nko?
How you go call person boss by 11:45pm? Haba

Bro, going as far as calling her boss was the greatest mistake you made. Fine, I quite understand how u felt when she wasn't reachable but what you lacked in this scenario was manly patience. She has the right to be angry cos you have just giving her boss a different definition of the type of employee he has, meaning that the organizations confidential matters aren't safe with her anymore which might cost her, her job. But nevertheless, you have tried by apologizing to her but yet she's adamant. She's so angry at the moment, give her time, she ll definitely get over it but mind you, don't put your hope in her that you ll end up getting married to her, cos you guys are just few months into the relationship and you ve started thinking of marriage. Be careful bro, take your time and don't be too loving....

Antimarraige:
Serves you right, big fool. Na your type dey send woman go school

I can bet my left yansh that the girl sef dey cheat. Show me a naija girl that doesn't cheat and I will show you a 90 year old virgin grandma

She dey Bleep her boss
The guy na mumu man

Mino1000:
Hi everyone, so I met this beautiful babe June this year and we started dating three months later. We genuinely loved each other and we had a relationship that people envied.

We trusted each other so much that I had access to her google account and all her personal info on my laptop, while she also had mine on her phone to cut the long story short, I have a problem of always getting worried whenever she is not home and I can't reach her for example if she leaves in a bolt and the journey is 30minutes but she is not reachable one hour later I start to worry and call people I feel are at home and even the bolt rider.

On this particular day, she had a meeting with her colleagues which just came into the country, she shared her live location but it was last updated an hour ago, she was not picking her calls and it was 11:45pm mind you she was in Ikeja and lives at lekki so she was still going to Lekki that night in this dangerous December month in Lagos. I called and called but she did not pick then I got so worried and went to her google contacts to get her boss number and called him. He told her I called and that is how trouble started.

She explained that nobody has his number and she is the middle man between him and clients so his number getting into my hands without her permission means his company info is not safe. She said I have destroyed all what she labored to build over the years and blocked me everywhere (phone, whatsapp, snapchat) and left me with only instagram access. I have been begging her since last night when this happened, but she only unblocked me to tell me not to call her again and blocked me back.

I have been trying to explain to her that relationship and marriage is full of challenges so she should not let this one destroy what we had but she has been ignoring me. If I call with a different number she hangs up immediately she hears my voice.

We were already talking about marriage and in fact, I had already started making arrangements for a proposal next year.

I swear I really love this lady with everything that I have and I know for a fact that she loved me too but right now I am confused I am wondering how she was so much in love with me yesterday morning but doesn’t even want to hear my voice today. She went as far as threatening to get me arrested if I come close to her house. I am really confused and need mature advice on what to do to save this relationship because right now I can’t focus on anything. Plus I trust her so I wasn’t calling because I thought she was doing something silly.

The most disheartening thing about your situation is that you can't even say the truth on a faceless forum where you are seeking for help.
You have so believed the lies you tell yourself and others.

You had a girl who loved you but your insecurities have caused you to lose her.

You tell yourself and others they you were not choking and bugging her with endless calls because you were worried. Lol. We know what's up. You are constantly scared you could lose her so you did what every scared immature man child dating a hot babe does.
You choke and smolder her. At first it was cute. She loved the care and the attention. Till it became over bearing. You couldn't trust that a grown ass woman could take care of herself.
You embarrassed her by calling everyone close to her whenever she didn't pick up.
I'm sure she talked to you about it. But your insecurities wouldn't free you long enough to live yourself and get busy doing things that would advance your own life.
How could you be so obsessed over a woman. That's a massive turn off.
A man should always have an air of mystery around him. No matter how much you love a woman, you must not lose yourself in expressing that love.

How could you invade her privacy and call her Boss. Jeopardizing her job. How can she ever trust you again. That was the last straw for her. She saw you for who you are. An uncontrollable man who cannot control his impluses... I could go on and on but I am sure you get it...
Brother you need help. Go and work on yourself. Have a healthy self esteem and build your mental health so much so that you can live without anyone and out yourself first.
Know this and know peace, when it comes to relationship and love, the more you are desperate to find and hold it, the more it runs away from you. Let it go, if it's for you, it will stay.
I just hope you will be able to move on from this whole thing. Seek help and be truthful

Guy, that girl is clearly cheating on you.

You may not get this message now, but sooner or later, your eyes will be clear.

She's multiple dating and the more you beg her, the cheaper you become and the more you repulse her.

Let her go and build your masculine frame before you dare go for another Nigeria girl again

jeromestarks:
There are two kinds Of people on this planet; those who deserve happiness and those who do not.

You're one of those who do not deserve happiness.

You're a fool.
Instead of you to move on and find another girl you're there saying rubbish and wasting your life away.

May you never find peace of mind.

why cursing the guy na.nawao for you

jeromestarks:
There are two kinds Of people on this planet; those who deserve happiness and those who do not.

You're one of those who do not deserve happiness.

You're a fool.
Instead of you to move on and find another girl you're there saying rubbish and wasting your life away.

May you never find peace of mind.

Another myopic and foolish comment. Na call the young make. He didn't kill anybody, you numb skull !! You want to crucify him fir calling his babe boss, because he couldn't speak to her and was still nit yet home by 11:45 pm . Infact all of una be IDIOT

God just saves you from entering one chance but deceit will not allow you see the future. I were you I will kuku go for thanksgiving for rescuing me from future bondage

Richy4:
Honestly bro.. I am scared for him.. People might think it's just nothing but..Hmmm!!!

Just imagine calling the boss over what exactly?.. was that the due process? Chaii!!!

the only person I know that can do this in my life currently is my mom. She can call anyone if it is late and your number isn't going through. But calling the boss wasn't a wrong decision although the op is insecure. If ur wife/fiance who normally comes home by 7/8pm is back home at 11pm and u have tried her line tire but it isn't going and the only number u have on her line is her boss own, won u call him.

Mino1000:
Hi everyone, so I met this beautiful babe June this year and we started dating three months later. We genuinely loved each other and we had a relationship that people envied.

We trusted each other so much that I had access to her google account and all her personal info on my laptop, while she also had mine on her phone to cut the long story short, I have a problem of always getting worried whenever she is not home and I can't reach her for example if she leaves in a bolt and the journey is 30minutes but she is not reachable one hour later I start to worry and call people I feel are at home and even the bolt rider.

On this particular day, she had a meeting with her colleagues which just came into the country, she shared her live location but it was last updated an hour ago, she was not picking her calls and it was 11:45pm mind you she was in Ikeja and lives at lekki so she was still going to Lekki that night in this dangerous December month in Lagos. I called and called but she did not pick then I got so worried and went to her google contacts to get her boss number and called him. He told her I called and that is how trouble started.

She explained that nobody has his number and she is the middle man between him and clients so his number getting into my hands without her permission means his company info is not safe. She said I have destroyed all what she labored to build over the years and blocked me everywhere (phone, whatsapp, snapchat) and left me with only instagram access. I have been begging her since last night when this happened, but she only unblocked me to tell me not to call her again and blocked me back.

I have been trying to explain to her that relationship and marriage is full of challenges so she should not let this one destroy what we had but she has been ignoring me. If I call with a different number she hangs up immediately she hears my voice.

We were already talking about marriage and in fact, I had already started making arrangements for a proposal next year.

I swear I really love this lady with everything that I have and I know for a fact that she loved me too but right now I am confused I am wondering how she was so much in love with me yesterday morning but doesn’t even want to hear my voice today. She went as far as threatening to get me arrested if I come close to her house. I am really confused and need mature advice on what to do to save this relationship because right now I can’t focus on anything. Plus I trust her so I wasn’t calling because I thought she was doing something silly.

Send her a surprise gift that is very expensive and thoughtful, through courier with an emotion laden letter of apology. Tell her you have learnt your lesson and you will not repeat the mistake.

Kobojunkie:
What self-esteem does OP have? Why should the girl change her mind when what she was dating was her stalker?

Help me ask ooo
He had to call her boss, as innnnn����

Tonymario58:
Am I the only one not seeing anything the OP did wrong?

Bro, you are not alone

Mino1000:
Hi everyone, so I met this beautiful babe June this year and we started dating three months later.

The girl is gaming you. She is not that into you and is keeping some secrets.

Otherwise, I don't see anything wrong in what you did. It was very late, you couldn't reach her so you called her boss. In that circumstance, there is nothing wrong in calling the office. She should even have reached out to you first that she would be staying out late. That's the right thing to do.

She should be appreciative that you're concerned about her safety. Unless there is something else either you or her is not saying.

Let her be and move on if she doesn't come back. I suspect foul play from her.

Mino1000:
Hi everyone, so I met this beautiful babe June this year and we started dating three months later. We genuinely loved each other and we had a relationship that people envied.

We trusted each other so much that I had access to her google account and all her personal info on my laptop, while she also had mine on her phone to cut the long story short, I have a problem of always getting worried whenever she is not home and I can't reach her for example if she leaves in a bolt and the journey is 30minutes but she is not reachable one hour later I start to worry and call people I feel are at home and even the bolt rider.

On this particular day, she had a meeting with her colleagues which just came into the country, she shared her live location but it was last updated an hour ago, she was not picking her calls and it was 11:45pm mind you she was in Ikeja and lives at lekki so she was still going to Lekki that night in this dangerous December month in Lagos. I called and called but she did not pick then I got so worried and went to her google contacts to get her boss number and called him. He told her I called and that is how trouble started.

She explained that nobody has his number and she is the middle man between him and clients so his number getting into my hands without her permission means his company info is not safe. She said I have destroyed all what she labored to build over the years and blocked me everywhere (phone, whatsapp, snapchat) and left me with only instagram access. I have been begging her since last night when this happened, but she only unblocked me to tell me not to call her again and blocked me back.

Please listen to me!

All these people here calling you SIMP don't have a serious relationship like you did. Some might not even have a girlfriend sef, so you are really in trouble posting your ordeal here!

Please don't get married in these age without going to God in prayers.

On a second Note, hope you are not dating a girl who is dating another and equally loved by another in abroad?

Tonymario58:
Am I the only one not seeing anything the OP did wrong?

Me too. I don't see anything wrong . That girl is playing him.

Ishilove:
Knowing the kind of person you are, she really has no business not picking calls by 11.45 pm. Relationship aside, my family will be worried sick if I am not picking my calls by that late hour so she has her own faults as well.

However, you didn't handle it well at all. Calling her boss was waaay out of line. You didn't call her family members, friends or colleagues. You jump go call boss. No, guy you were wrong and I'd be mad as well if I were in her position. Respect yourself and give her space for now. You're just being a pest and further worsening the situation.

When she is calmer and is able to solve whatever shitstorm your indiscretion caused, she may reach out to you.

Or maybe not. You win some, you lose some. If you lose this one, learn your lesson so it doesn't repeat itself

Nice one Ishilove.. It's really been a long time

How fornicators live together under the same roof, and then plan on getting married, is what I don't understand.

I know it's difficult but you've to give her a space.

I faced the similar situation years ago. I dated a lady for 4 years, it was at the fourth year, she told me, she was not interested again without any reason, and that I would be wasting my time sending people to appeal to her, referring to her mum and aunty.

It was bitter pill to swallow because l fell sick and it was too difficult to forget or not to think of her. I had to recondition my mind and started a weekend professional training course to free myself because I was used to seeing every weekend.

The training helped to refocus my attention. Guess what? Precisely three months after she made those statements, she came to my office to apologize, saying she was under some from of pressure and not thinking right, now she had realized her mistake and would like us to continue the relationship.

I told her, I've redirected my energy to develop my career, I dont have time for any relationship now, after much pressure and crying, I asked her to give me one month to think about it. A month later when she came, I told her I've decided to move forward without her in my life and wished her all the best.

Op, don't kill yourself, if after begging she remains adamant, just give her a space.

Mino1000:
Hi everyone, so I met this beautiful babe June this year and we started dating three months later. We genuinely loved each other and we had a relationship that people envied.

We trusted each other so much that I had access to her google account and all her personal info on my laptop, while she also had mine on her phone to cut the long story short, I have a problem of always getting worried whenever she is not home and I can't reach her for example if she leaves in a bolt and the journey is 30minutes but she is not reachable one hour later I start to worry and call people I feel are at home and even the bolt rider.

On this particular day, she had a meeting with her colleagues which just came into the country, she shared her live location but it was last updated an hour ago, she was not picking her calls and it was 11:45pm mind you she was in Ikeja and lives at lekki so she was still going to Lekki that night in this dangerous December month in Lagos. I called and called but she did not pick then I got so worried and went to her google contacts to get her boss number and called him. He told her I called and that is how trouble started.

She explained that nobody has his number and she is the middle man between him and clients so his number getting into my hands without her permission means his company info is not safe. She said I have destroyed all what she labored to build over the years and blocked me everywhere (phone, whatsapp, snapchat) and left me with only instagram access. I have been begging her since last night when this happened, but she only unblocked me to tell me not to call her again and blocked me back.

I have been trying to explain to her that relationship and marriage is full of challenges so she should not let this one destroy what we had but she has been ignoring me. If I call with a different number she hangs up immediately she hears my voice.

We were already talking about marriage and in fact, I had already started making arrangements for a proposal next year.

I swear I really love this lady with everything that I have and I know for a fact that she loved me too but right now I am confused I am wondering how she was so much in love with me yesterday morning but doesn’t even want to hear my voice today. She went as far as threatening to get me arrested if I come close to her house. I am really confused and need mature advice on what to do to save this relationship because right now I can’t focus on anything. Plus I trust her so I wasn’t calling because I thought she was doing something silly.

That’s stocking... very annoying habit you got there!.. if you trust her, why worry too much about her,... is always good for a man to marry a woman that’s into you..
Please give the queen a breathing space with your yeye habit na!
Btw, you called her boss?! You are lucky you are far away from me... you want to let her lose her livelihood? That your flat head deserved a koko strong knock in the middle...
just give her time to get over it.. ode man!

Nice...

Franzinni:
Hehe guy I know how you feel but to be honest you messed up big time, you know a woman loves to be chased but e get when she need to rest from all the running, alot of young men don't know and they keep chasing who nor dey run. ... You had her but now you have lost her forever becasue even if she takes you back and forgives you, you would not have the masculine frame and trust me in little or no time she will dump you patapata.

My advice is give her space ... Let her breath small, you can't choke another person and be asking them why they are choking goddammit!

You even went as far as calling her boss ...Omo you dey love puppy love ...wake up ! Wake your self the f up!! If you love her, you would be mature and apologize, then respect her decisions and give her space... Guy nah woman she be, if you play it right she will come back to you but if you think you can beg your way to her heart back you will only become repulsive and simply cheap.

Man up and shift your focus to your hustle even if your mind go her place ... Endure, resist and persist. After some days you will adjust and then you would be able to see clearly .

I have been in your shoes ... When I was in secondary school, I loved a girl so much ( I thought I did ) that I would wake up write a love letter, then walk like 30 miles to her school before she gets to school and wait to give her the letter, in my mind, that was the price to pay for love but in reality I was only being a pest, and a repulsive creature.

Let her breath... Your perception of love might not be her reality.

Mino1000, your gf doesn't love you. That's all I'm gonna say on this matter.

Antimarraige:
Serves you right, big fool. Na your type dey send woman go school

I can bet my left yansh that the girl sef dey cheat. Show me a naija girl that doesn't cheat and I will show you a 90 year old virgin grandma

I don't cheat sir

Mino1000

Why marry someone you don't trust? Why always acting like "big brother" and watching her every movement? The fault is entirely yours.

You're being too possessive. Nobody likes his or her space being invaded.

One fundamental rule about a good relationship is this: if you can't do without another person, end the relation. You're being a parasite. If she too is that way, she's being a parasite. Her ability to walk away is strong character.

A parasite will cling to you even when there are red flags. Then they come here complaining that their wives are like this and that here on nairaland and we ask, "did you not see these signs before hand?"

Being a parasite means you're in the relationship for your own benefit and not hers. You may deny it and say "no".

Many ladies for instance in their 30s stay with a cheater because they are desperate to marry. They are in it strictly for themselves. They don't even know if they love the man, they just want to settle down.

Many insecure men can be very clingy. A cousin of mine clung to his girlfriend for about 8 years despite knowing she flirted around. My cousin was the shy type. He probably felt he could not get another girl.

When he became more confident, he dumped the girl, though she provided the rope for her own lynching. She traveled to Italy and came back and my cousin wanted nothing to do with her. Of course you know why. She later married an idiot she met in Libya who abused her and beat a child out of her stomach. I warned her about the bum.

She's 50 now, single without a child.Shes no more the ravishing ebira beauty she was back then but now looks old and disused.

Let this lady be. Walk away. If you have to micro manage your partner's movements, then she's not for you.

Everybody be acting career woke, we are talking 11:45pm.
I go call the CEO join.
The lady is clearly the problem here.
Rubbish.
Abeg OP channel your love to someone else but reserve it small so you are not mistaken to be obsessed.

pocohantas:
Another foolish female has given a man unrestricted access to personal and even work information in less than 6 months.

Tomorrow when you start going crazy like Empress Njamah’s whatever, people would blame. I don’t understand my gender sometimes.

All those information might just be a decoy. She wants him to feel like he is in control, while she goes around cheating. The moment the guy tried to put those information to good use. Boom !! she dumps him.
She has not explained what she was doing in her office by 11:45 pm that was so important not to pick his calls. She has not explained why she is soo angry that her man called her boss(someone she supposedly spends her working hours with) to know if she is alright

Annahh:
No matter how I love my man, he can't have access to my company email account login which bears my signature, I wonder why your babe gave you her Google company accounts which should be a private thing, she wasn't professional and you are insecure. Sorry to say it. Just move on and learn to give people space, she is a big girl and can take care of herself. I can never give my man my Google login especially my company email login. If I try it, I stand the chance of losing my job.

Next time try to read to understand and not with prejudice to comment

TheExclusive:
Me too. I don't see anything wrong . That girl is playing him.

Thank God I wasn't alone.
They wanted the guy to contact the police

U don't beg and chase women.. U treating her like a celebrity

franchasng:
I am a happily married young man, and I can tell you to go and celebrate for you dodged a Russian nuclear missile

Another brilliant mind

You just described my husband. It's good to love but everything has limit.
Three weeks ago I travelled to Ibadan and put a call through to him immediately I got to Ibadan oo.
Thereafter I switched off my phone to charge it.
When I put it on, I called a friend to tell her that I was in Ibadan. The first question she asked was have you called your husband, he's been worried.

Mind you, I was with his elder brother and his wife oo.

My husband had called a friend at Abeokuta asking whether she heard from me, called his brother and wife(they didn't picked cos we were in a party) etc.

My head sparked. I was furious.
Am I a baby? Can I leave house in peace again. That has been his usual habit.
I don't even know how best to check him. it isn't issue of trust . Even our last born was playing one day with her siblings and said my daddy can call for Africa, kilode.

At OP, be calming down next time.

Fiscus105:
If ur story is true, that lady is not type you should worry about and she doesn't love you shishi, she is the type who would carry job on top of head and careless about marriage, husband and kids. Infact, she can Bleep outside marriage for job security and carrier progression.

For those that blaming op, for calling boss, either you are teens or myopic in reasoning.
Any boss who is angry that they called him to know whereabout of his employees, it's either he is satanist or his having amorous relationship with the employee.

...... imagine if you think she is in danger by not picking your calls and try to reach out with anyone who can have her number,at least to know her whereabouts......

Meanwhile, which job is she doing that her loved ones won't be able to call colleagues or boss for her safety?

This is the comment i've been looking for. Thank you. I agree in totality

Mino1000:
Hi everyone, so I met this beautiful babe June this year and we started dating three months later. We genuinely loved each other and we had a relationship that people envied.

We trusted each other so much that I had access to her google account and all her personal info on my laptop, while she also had mine on her phone to cut the long story short, I have a problem of always getting worried whenever she is not home and I can't reach her for example if she leaves in a bolt and the journey is 30minutes but she is not reachable one hour later I start to worry and call people I feel are at home and even the bolt rider.

On this particular day, she had a meeting with her colleagues which just came into the country, she shared her live location but it was last updated an hour ago, she was not picking her calls and it was 11:45pm mind you she was in Ikeja and lives at lekki so she was still going to Lekki that night in this dangerous December month in Lagos. I called and called but she did not pick then I got so worried and went to her google contacts to get her boss number and called him. He told her I called and that is how trouble started.

She explained that nobody has his number and she is the middle man between him and clients so his number getting into my hands without her permission means his company info is not safe. She said I have destroyed all what she labored to build over the years and blocked me everywhere (phone, whatsapp, snapchat) and left me with only instagram access. I have been begging her since last night when this happened, but she only unblocked me to tell me not to call her again and blocked me back.

I have been trying to explain to her that relationship and marriage is full of challenges so she should not let this one destroy what we had but she has been ignoring me. If I call with a different number she hangs up immediately she hears my voice.

We were already talking about marriage and in fact, I had already started making arrangements for a proposal next year.

I swear I really love this lady with everything that I have and I know for a fact that she loved me too but right now I am confused I am wondering how she was so much in love with me yesterday morning but doesn’t even want to hear my voice today. She went as far as threatening to get me arrested if I come close to her house. I am really confused and need mature advice on what to do to save this relationship because right now I can’t focus on anything. Plus I trust her so I wasn’t calling because I thought she was doing something silly.

If I were the said lady... I will do the same. You're not man enough. Wait till you grow balls

You lack self control and self discipline. Marriage is for men and not boys regardless of your age. How dare you calling her boss when you can basically leave a message on WhatsApp for her? You will endanger her the more if she dare comes back