₦airaland Forum

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.

Well I was young, naive, hungry and blindly in love. He went to trade school and I encouraged him to go back to school for HND or bsc but he said he was going to sponsor me first. I got pregnant for him in my first year in school when I was 20yrs old, my mom was against it. I got to know he was 13years older than me while pregnant. HE TOLD ME HE WAS 26yrs old.

My mom wanted me to abort it, instead i packed my things and stayed with him.
He abused my mom and I defended him. I gave birth while in school and he continued to support me both financially. We fought during those period, series of red flag but I decided to ignore it as long he wasn't beating me. He abused me emotionally. He knew my family was poor and there was no where i could go.

I finished school and my friends told me not to marry a plumber, I declined and told them he promised to go to school.

I finished school and i was scared of depending on him with my child, we were not doing fine at all.

I had no choice than to date a rich guy who helped me with a good job in the year 2017. HE got to know about the guy and i broke up with him. I apologized and we GOT MARRIED LEGALLY and got pregnant with my second child. We spent only 150k.

All the money i made from my salary, I made sure i supported him, i moved out of the family house in the year 2019, we have been there for 8yrs, he couldnt afford to rent a house, I spent 400k, both of us had no friends, we only had each other. I helped my brother and they did well in business. I asked my husband to go back to school, he was still adamant.

We went to a traditional person and they told him there is a curse on his head that i should bathe and do some sacrifice for him, which i did.

By year 2020 he was doing fine, we didn't even go hungry during the lockdown, I supported him with 2million naira and we did our traditional marriage.

IT was his business patners who were notorious cheat and neglected their wife that did his groom men, They introduced him to an association, i have asked him what is the aim of the association, he cant tell me, it is a secret.

3 months after the wedding, he started cheating and even beat me for the first time on our wedding anniversary becaus of the girl,
When he saw i withdrawed all financia assistant like paying half of the rent and paying one of the kids school fees. he called family members to beg me and we settled and i bought a family car for us to use.

Since then i have been walking on eggs around him, he tells me i should respect his age that we are not mate, he beat me again last 3 months saying i am as proud as my mother and i abused his mother back.

This monday i had to run after bus to go to work because i told im i was looking for mOney, and he said i just call him a thief. I had no money on me i had to call my brother to give me money. He wasnt even bothered. He doesn't call me again, WE DONT GO OUT AGAIN


I don't stress him for expensive outing our wigs or phone.
I bought my phone or trip myself out. He would rather hang out with his friends. He tells his friends and the kids i wear cheap outfits.

My mind is now strong. I don't cry again if he offends me nor complain.

I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

Move on babes. You married a MAN-CHILD

advanceDNA:
As per your jappa.....Embassy will ask for his consent or proof u have sole custody of ur kids....u can't do it behind him, he can write the embassy and accuse u of kidnap...

So plan yourself well

She can say he is dead and procure his death certificate

Sorry for your experience . No place is actually easy. Just think well, if u japa with your kids, the cost of nanny n house rent ll take all you ll labour for.

piecuntie:
Those saying i want to go back to the rich guy,
It is not like that, After breaking up with him, he cursed me and blocked me everywhere. he is married with kids.

i dont intend to remarry anymore. I just wan to start a business or have an hobby.
I started having sex with him since i was 19. i am fed up with sex pls.

my husband was my bestfriend, i dont have friends.

I feel i should start afresh with my life but i cant leave my kids because i am an introvert.

Well, I carefully gone through ur original thread.
I want to believe what you are saying is true.Though,I wud av liked to here from ur husband too for me to be able to give a balanced judgement.

But then again,judeging from ur own write up,I can infer that your major problems are:
1. Age difference of 13
2. Class of his occupation/level of his education
3. Emotional/physical abuse

To me,out of the 3 problems enumerated above,it is only one (emotional/physical abuse) that is really a thing of concern.
Cos even me,I won't take it kindly with any of my in-laws that try to beat my sisters because me,I will never beat my wife when I marry.
That act looks so barbaric and inhuman to me not matter wot de woman do.

But concerning the other 2,I am still wondering why you allowed that to contribute to ruining ur once peaceful home.
First of all, the man is not idle.
Plumbing work is a good handwork.
If he has trained you through out university education n you now have a well paid job,why not upgrade his level of business to your taste by setting up a shop that deals on plumbing and pipe fittings materials for him to complement his low level civil service work?
Then concerning his low level of education,I think I read from you (if I am not mistaken) that he passed through trade school.
Meaning that he must have gone to technical college and thereafter undergo learning of the trade he is practicing today.With that,I think he can read, write and communicate a little in English.So he is not an illiterate.Why did you pressurized him to further his education?
Do you know whether he is accademically incline as such?
It is not everybody that must go to a university or any other higher institutions.
So you shouldn't have allowed that to really bother you so far he is not a stack illiterate.

As for age, you said you were 20 while he was 33 when you people got married.
What is wrong there?
The age difference of 10--15 years to me is not bad at all.
Believe you me, you will grow up to be at the same 'age' with him physically in no distant time.
If you were 20 and he was 50,60 and above before the marriage.
Then it would have been a thing of concern.

If you hadn't already made up ur mind to walk away of the marriage,I wud have advised you stay n try to settle the problem of the abuse.
But now, you have already made up ur mind.So no need for any advice again for you to stay.
Even with that,as you are walking away,let it be on the ground of the emotional/physical abuse and not on the other two.

It really showed you were poor and you need every opportunity to reap where you didn’t show.
- first the man sponsored you cuz your family was poor despite your family not in support you still proceeded to marry him cuz of the benefit.

- you still go knack another rich dude wey give you job.
Well you can divorce all you want but no go carry his kids jakpa without his knowledge, cuz if he later get to know he can take it up and this is a serious issue that’s kidnapping, deceit and forgery ( if you use oluwole consent letter).
Don’t even try to come to Uk as a single mother, daycare for one child here is £4 per hour imagine you have 2 kids that’s £8 per hour on 2 kids and your salary is £10 per hour.
Don’t forget you can only work 20 hours weekly so imagine you’re earning £800 monthly.
How will you pay for daycare, rent and bills, foods, school fees balance?
And don’t forget for a family of 3 you will spend btw 10-13m, house rent na monthly here o.

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.

Well I was young, naive, hungry and blindly in love. He went to trade school and I encouraged him to go back to school for HND or bsc but he said he was going to sponsor me first. I got pregnant for him in my first year in school when I was 20yrs old, my mom was against it. I got to know he was 13years older than me while pregnant. HE TOLD ME HE WAS 26yrs old.

My mom wanted me to abort it, instead i packed my things and stayed with him.
He abused my mom and I defended him. I gave birth while in school and he continued to support me both financially. We fought during those period, series of red flag but I decided to ignore it as long he wasn't beating me. He abused me emotionally. He knew my family was poor and there was no where i could go.

I finished school and my friends told me not to marry a plumber, I declined and told them he promised to go to school.

I finished school and i was scared of depending on him with my child, we were not doing fine at all.

I had no choice than to date a rich guy who helped me with a good job in the year 2017. HE got to know about the guy and i broke up with him. I apologized and we GOT MARRIED LEGALLY and got pregnant with my second child. We spent only 150k.

All the money i made from my salary, I made sure i supported him, i moved out of the family house in the year 2019, we have been there for 8yrs, he couldnt afford to rent a house, I spent 400k, both of us had no friends, we only had each other. I helped my brother and they did well in business. I asked my husband to go back to school, he was still adamant.

We went to a traditional person and they told him there is a curse on his head that i should bathe and do some sacrifice for him, which i did.

By year 2020 he was doing fine, we didn't even go hungry during the lockdown, I supported him with 2million naira and we did our traditional marriage.

IT was his business patners who were notorious cheat and neglected their wife that did his groom men, They introduced him to an association, i have asked him what is the aim of the association, he cant tell me, it is a secret.

3 months after the wedding, he started cheating and even beat me for the first time on our wedding anniversary becaus of the girl,
When he saw i withdrawed all financia assistant like paying half of the rent and paying one of the kids school fees. he called family members to beg me and we settled and i bought a family car for us to use.

Since then i have been walking on eggs around him, he tells me i should respect his age that we are not mate, he beat me again last 3 months saying i am as proud as my mother and i abused his mother back.

This monday i had to run after bus to go to work because i told im i was looking for mOney, and he said i just call him a thief. I had no money on me i had to call my brother to give me money. He wasnt even bothered. He doesn't call me again, WE DONT GO OUT AGAIN


I don't stress him for expensive outing our wigs or phone.
I bought my phone or trip myself out. He would rather hang out with his friends. He tells his friends and the kids i wear cheap outfits.

My mind is now strong. I don't cry again if he offends me nor complain.

I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

/

Your life, your choice.

It is extremely difficult to advise women knowing that they are quick to run to social media with sobby stories even when they are at fault.

Do whatever you want.

/

Ok12345:
Na wa oo

What does men want?

See this aunty married someone that sponsored her in school and she is still seeing shege.

Men want Ingreesh

If the finances is the issue why you can’t leave him, you already paid him back x10.
What’s your real excuse for not leaving?
It has to be more than financial.
Do you still love him? Are you staying for the kids like they say? What’s the main issue? Because you’re not financially indebted to him so I don’t see why that’s in your topic

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.

Well I was young, naive, hungry and blindly in love. He went to trade school and I encouraged him to go back to school for HND or bsc but he said he was going to sponsor me first. I got pregnant for him in my first year in school when I was 20yrs old, my mom was against it. I got to know he was 13years older than me while pregnant. HE TOLD ME HE WAS 26yrs old.

My mom wanted me to abort it, instead i packed my things and stayed with him.
He abused my mom and I defended him. I gave birth while in school and he continued to support me both financially. We fought during those period, series of red flag but I decided to ignore it as long he wasn't beating me. He abused me emotionally. He knew my family was poor and there was no where i could go.

I finished school and my friends told me not to marry a plumber, I declined and told them he promised to go to school.

I finished school and i was scared of depending on him with my child, we were not doing fine at all.

I had no choice than to date a rich guy who helped me with a good job in the year 2017. HE got to know about the guy and i broke up with him. I apologized and we GOT MARRIED LEGALLY and got pregnant with my second child. We spent only 150k.

All the money i made from my salary, I made sure i supported him, i moved out of the family house in the year 2019, we have been there for 8yrs, he couldnt afford to rent a house, I spent 400k, both of us had no friends, we only had each other. I helped my brother and they did well in business. I asked my husband to go back to school, he was still adamant.

We went to a traditional person and they told him there is a curse on his head that i should bathe and do some sacrifice for him, which i did.

By year 2020 he was doing fine, we didn't even go hungry during the lockdown, I supported him with 2million naira and we did our traditional marriage.

IT was his business patners who were notorious cheat and neglected their wife that did his groom men, They introduced him to an association, i have asked him what is the aim of the association, he cant tell me, it is a secret.

3 months after the wedding, he started cheating and even beat me for the first time on our wedding anniversary becaus of the girl,
When he saw i withdrawed all financia assistant like paying half of the rent and paying one of the kids school fees. he called family members to beg me and we settled and i bought a family car for us to use.

Since then i have been walking on eggs around him, he tells me i should respect his age that we are not mate, he beat me again last 3 months saying i am as proud as my mother and i abused his mother back.

This monday i had to run after bus to go to work because i told im i was looking for mOney, and he said i just call him a thief. I had no money on me i had to call my brother to give me money. He wasnt even bothered. He doesn't call me again, WE DONT GO OUT AGAIN


I don't stress him for expensive outing our wigs or phone.
I bought my phone or trip myself out. He would rather hang out with his friends. He tells his friends and the kids i wear cheap outfits.

My mind is now strong. I don't cry again if he offends me nor complain.

I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

Avoid women from poor homes. They will only use and dump you later.

Sad story.

So you were with him and yo cheated on him with a married man. Now he’s doing it back and war don start ba? Have you told us how you have been disrespecting him at home just because you have a good job? No be woman u be again? Your hand don reach better now na to Dey ask who killed una father. Shior!

Evii:
At the start of your story you said he's 13 yrs older than you while at the end of the story you said he's 44 while yours 31 yrs...your story isn't clear.

So 44 - 31 is what again? I guess 3 abi and not 13?

You are the reason for the toxic marriage. You are materialistic and very disrespectful to your man.
Change your ways and be submissive. That is the only way to save this marriage.
If you get the divorce you will regret it.

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.

Well I was young, naive, hungry and blindly in love. He went to trade school and I encouraged him to go back to school for HND or bsc but he said he was going to sponsor me first. I got pregnant for him in my first year in school when I was 20yrs old, my mom was against it. I got to know he was 13years older than me while pregnant. HE TOLD ME HE WAS 26yrs old.

My mom wanted me to abort it, instead i packed my things and stayed with him.
He abused my mom and I defended him. I gave birth while in school and he continued to support me both financially. We fought during those period, series of red flag but I decided to ignore it as long he wasn't beating me. He abused me emotionally. He knew my family was poor and there was no where i could go.

I finished school and my friends told me not to marry a plumber, I declined and told them he promised to go to school.

I finished school and i was scared of depending on him with my child, we were not doing fine at all.

I had no choice than to date a rich guy who helped me with a good job in the year 2017. HE got to know about the guy and i broke up with him. I apologized and we GOT MARRIED LEGALLY and got pregnant with my second child. We spent only 150k.

All the money i made from my salary, I made sure i supported him, i moved out of the family house in the year 2019, we have been there for 8yrs, he couldnt afford to rent a house, I spent 400k, both of us had no friends, we only had each other. I helped my brother and they did well in business. I asked my husband to go back to school, he was still adamant.

We went to a traditional person and they told him there is a curse on his head that i should bathe and do some sacrifice for him, which i did.

By year 2020 he was doing fine, we didn't even go hungry during the lockdown, I supported him with 2million naira and we did our traditional marriage.

IT was his business patners who were notorious cheat and neglected their wife that did his groom men, They introduced him to an association, i have asked him what is the aim of the association, he cant tell me, it is a secret.

3 months after the wedding, he started cheating and even beat me for the first time on our wedding anniversary becaus of the girl,
When he saw i withdrawed all financia assistant like paying half of the rent and paying one of the kids school fees. he called family members to beg me and we settled and i bought a family car for us to use.

Since then i have been walking on eggs around him, he tells me i should respect his age that we are not mate, he beat me again last 3 months saying i am as proud as my mother and i abused his mother back.

This monday i had to run after bus to go to work because i told im i was looking for mOney, and he said i just call him a thief. I had no money on me i had to call my brother to give me money. He wasnt even bothered. He doesn't call me again, WE DONT GO OUT AGAIN


I don't stress him for expensive outing our wigs or phone.
I bought my phone or trip myself out. He would rather hang out with his friends. He tells his friends and the kids i wear cheap outfits.

My mind is now strong. I don't cry again if he offends me nor complain.

I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

ednut1:
Avoid women from poor homes. They will only use and dump you later.

Bros, this your advice hit me hard; I wan cry sef.

Damn!

[quote author=piecuntie post=119229215]HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.
These are what I noticed about you.
1) you listen to stories outside too much that can influence you.
2) Men outside are telling you what you want to hear
3) you respected him when he was talking care of you in school but see yourself more better than him now
4) you pay for your children school fee is not a help to your husband, is a support. Even if you get married to an angel, if you don't respect him, you will still come back to this platform for a complain.

bestman09:

I hate any form of abuse, both physical and emotional in marriages. You have a thousand reasons to divorce him but one reason to rebuild the marriage. There are 3 sides to a story, (1) your side of the story (2) your husband's side of the story and (3) the truth about everything. Have you asked yourself about what would have happened if he didn't sponsor you in school at his own expense?

I have a blood sister that the husband sponsored to the UK about 14 years ago and sent her to nursing school. She became a citizen, rich while the man was deported about 5 years ago because of Visa issues. Now she divorced the man over some flimsy excuse 2 years ago despite the 3 children they have.

Women with power and wealth tends to take their men for granted

I was looking for this comment. Though, I felt the guy should have told her everything about himself, instead of lying about his job and all. If you're a plumber, say it with your chest.

She must have used his situation to abuse him before he started going physical. It's wrong to hit your partner.


Piecuntie, stop listening to outsiders. Try not to stay for him to hit you - safety is paramount.

All I can say is that you're a good woman and I wish you all the best

I hate the aspects that the he beats you and he has joined a cult. He will not turn back until his eyes clear and it might be too late
The fact that you cheated while engaged to him though very reprehensible, you have done do much for him to compensate for your sin and make him be the proper head of the family. He is toeing the path that suits him. Trust me, that path will destroy him.
There is no food for a lazy man. I urge you to
implement your plan and move on fast. With two children and current economic realities, you have enough in your portfolio.

Well done.

MufasaLion:
There's nothing as interesting as being single, amass wealth and focus on other important things. This marriage thing will make y'all go crazy.

Make sure you leave that man but have an agreement on the custody of the kids. Kindly reach out to a divorce attorney.

I agreed with this writer. Everyone wants to japa? Abroad na your mate? Its like entering another trouble water. Get in touch with justice FUNMI ASAOLU on online or through you tube and your matter would be settled. It either you are on your own, while your husband is compelled to take Care of the kids or she introduce you and your husband to marriage counselor. Wishing you all the best.l sincerely sympathise with you. I can see the efforts you have made so far. Nonetheless, your husband love you but the evil association has carried him against you.l still believe nothing prayer cannot do.Good luck.

brandsoncharlie:
Me, I won't invest in any woman, if you're not from a well to do family forget.
Imagine a friend I know because of getting Canadian citizenship he married a Nigerian girl he's training in school in Canada.
Just imagine while he has siblings who the parents expect him to bring over to Canada and help too.
Some men aren't thinking well with their brains.

Me nko, those days I was younger. There was this beautiful lady I met through a friend that gave her a ride from church. Then then cannanland was about to be built. Winners was at its smaller location before the high rise at Egbeda was built.
That was how I got friendly with her oh and we started dating. This lady had a man in my estate that had being sponsoring her. Helping her with therapy, her school work, school, expenses, cloths everything as she had a humble back ground. He did not touch her sexually as he was grooming her for marriage. The guy was a either a doctor, physiotherapist, sha an older man in the medical field.
Long and short, took over, pooped the cherry and started dating her. When this baba heared he went mental. Found out who I was I even threaten to kill that "big man's" son. Lol. The lady bullshitted him, that he should go to hell.
Funy how life goes. She is a big woman now. Well established.
I know my cousin married a lady a man groomed all the way through uni, supported her family etc, action man came, met with the family and proposed once, and married her!
Those days in Surulere, a know Ghanaian teacher and lesson school owner invested 10 years on this little girl all the way from secondary to university. The girl finally rejected him, this man almost had a stroke and had to relocate to ghana. Funny but sad. Lol

Trust women to only tell one side of the story. a side of the story is true but not completely true, to make a balanced judgment, both sides must be listened to without bias.

The foundation was wrong, wrong decisions but unfortunately, none of them can be changed.

Beating is a red flag and it will get worse, leave before your husband kills you out of anger one day.

If divorce will make you feel better or happier, go for it. You've tried.

The incompatibility between you guys is quite great and unfortunately it will only get worse with time.

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.

Well I was young, naive, hungry and blindly in love. He went to trade school and I encouraged him to go back to school for HND or bsc but he said he was going to sponsor me first. I got pregnant for him in my first year in school when I was 20yrs old, my mom was against it. I got to know he was 13years older than me while pregnant. HE TOLD ME HE WAS 26yrs old.

My mom wanted me to abort it, instead i packed my things and stayed with him.
He abused my mom and I defended him. I gave birth while in school and he continued to support me both financially. We fought during those period, series of red flag but I decided to ignore it as long he wasn't beating me. He abused me emotionally. He knew my family was poor and there was no where i could go.

I finished school and my friends told me not to marry a plumber, I declined and told them he promised to go to school.

I finished school and i was scared of depending on him with my child, we were not doing fine at all.

I had no choice than to date a rich guy who helped me with a good job in the year 2017. HE got to know about the guy and i broke up with him. I apologized and we GOT MARRIED LEGALLY and got pregnant with my second child. We spent only 150k.

All the money i made from my salary, I made sure i supported him, i moved out of the family house in the year 2019, we have been there for 8yrs, he couldnt afford to rent a house, I spent 400k, both of us had no friends, we only had each other. I helped my brother and they did well in business. I asked my husband to go back to school, he was still adamant.

We went to a traditional person and they told him there is a curse on his head that i should bathe and do some sacrifice for him, which i did.

By year 2020 he was doing fine, we didn't even go hungry during the lockdown, I supported him with 2million naira and we did our traditional marriage.

IT was his business patners who were notorious cheat and neglected their wife that did his groom men, They introduced him to an association, i have asked him what is the aim of the association, he cant tell me, it is a secret.

3 months after the wedding, he started cheating and even beat me for the first time on our wedding anniversary becaus of the girl,
When he saw i withdrawed all financia assistant like paying half of the rent and paying one of the kids school fees. he called family members to beg me and we settled and i bought a family car for us to use.

Since then i have been walking on eggs around him, he tells me i should respect his age that we are not mate, he beat me again last 3 months saying i am as proud as my mother and i abused his mother back.

This monday i had to run after bus to go to work because i told im i was looking for mOney, and he said i just call him a thief. I had no money on me i had to call my brother to give me money. He wasnt even bothered. He doesn't call me again, WE DONT GO OUT AGAIN


I don't stress him for expensive outing our wigs or phone.
I bought my phone or trip myself out. He would rather hang out with his friends. He tells his friends and the kids i wear cheap outfits.

My mind is now strong. I don't cry again if he offends me nor complain.

I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

Let me reserve my comment am not yet married when I get married I will know how to attend to matter that concern marriage

rickpat:
if you're truly fed up..YOU WON'T SEEK ANY ADVISE...

good luck

Very simple

piecuntie:
he was my first.
i met him as a virgin.i loved him.

i cheated because he threw me and my first child out because his ex came back begging.
i moved on and started dating the other guy, we were about getting married sef, it was my family that asked me to call off the engagement and give him a try one more time.

Now a lot of people here commenting won’t read this her update. @OP please add this your post to the original post so that people can get the full picture.

Psalm 11:3 If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do?

All I see in this whole story is just two confused people who came together to complicate the lives of the kids they had after. The man is a serial liar (once a liar always a liar) he lied about everything from the very beginning. OP could have left when she saw the red flags but didn’t because of what she was gaining. The man chased her and the kid out for his ex and OP went to date some other guy ( both parties were cheating on each other) they involved their families and had a forced union (both parties not forgiving or forgetting their cheating history~ a disaster waiting to happen).

I’m not surprised this union failed, it was built to fail, I’m only surprised it took this long.

Now the man is a woman beater (once a woman beater always a woman beater) they both have history of cheating (once a cheat always a cheat, and I won’t be surprised if they’re both cheating right now).

OP abeg no dare come UK here alone with those two kids cos you go spend all your earnings on child care. Infact Home Office no go give those children visa without their father approval so just forget it.

Summarily, there are 3 sides to every story (we await the other 2 sides) only God can help you both now, cos unah done Bleep up too much for any human being to help unah.

Idaytesj29:
She also cheated with the rich guy

Not a lie Man
But it has happened! And can't be undone

It's better she runs because that man can never love her again... it's a big wound in Man's heart that can never be healed especially when you know that your wife is a cheat real life..no that pastor or Alfa that can make such marriage works...so let her run better than her having mental issue in that marriage
Fear Bleeding creature Man!

No marriage is always jolly if you like marry a billionaire, all these I can understand were because of poverty, you cheated because of condition that was enough to bring calamity upon yourself, you have to continue to try convince him and work things out.

If your destiny lies with him even if you like run to the Mars you won't go above that/him

piecuntie:
HI NAIRALANDERS ;
I am about to seperate from husband who sponsored me in school because I am fed up.

I came from a very poor family. I met my husband when I was 19. He wasn't doing well either, he told me he was an engineer in a public hospital but as time went on I got to know he was a level 3 plumber in the civil service.

Well I was young, naive, hungry and blindly in love. He went to trade school and I encouraged him to go back to school for HND or bsc but he said he was going to sponsor me first. I got pregnant for him in my first year in school when I was 20yrs old, my mom was against it. I got to know he was 13years older than me while pregnant. HE TOLD ME HE WAS 26yrs old.

My mom wanted me to abort it, instead i packed my things and stayed with him.
He abused my mom and I defended him. I gave birth while in school and he continued to support me both financially. We fought during those period, series of red flag but I decided to ignore it as long he wasn't beating me. He abused me emotionally. He knew my family was poor and there was no where i could go.

I finished school and my friends told me not to marry a plumber, I declined and told them he promised to go to school.

I finished school and i was scared of depending on him with my child, we were not doing fine at all.

I had no choice than to date a rich guy who helped me with a good job in the year 2017. HE got to know about the guy and i broke up with him. I apologized and we GOT MARRIED LEGALLY and got pregnant with my second child. We spent only 150k.

All the money i made from my salary, I made sure i supported him, i moved out of the family house in the year 2019, we have been there for 8yrs, he couldnt afford to rent a house, I spent 400k, both of us had no friends, we only had each other. I helped my brother and they did well in business. I asked my husband to go back to school, he was still adamant.

We went to a traditional person and they told him there is a curse on his head that i should bathe and do some sacrifice for him, which i did.

By year 2020 he was doing fine, we didn't even go hungry during the lockdown, I supported him with 2million naira and we did our traditional marriage.

IT was his business patners who were notorious cheat and neglected their wife that did his groom men, They introduced him to an association, i have asked him what is the aim of the association, he cant tell me, it is a secret.

3 months after the wedding, he started cheating and even beat me for the first time on our wedding anniversary becaus of the girl,
When he saw i withdrawed all financia assistant like paying half of the rent and paying one of the kids school fees. he called family members to beg me and we settled and i bought a family car for us to use.

Since then i have been walking on eggs around him, he tells me i should respect his age that we are not mate, he beat me again last 3 months saying i am as proud as my mother and i abused his mother back.

This monday i had to run after bus to go to work because i told im i was looking for mOney, and he said i just call him a thief. I had no money on me i had to call my brother to give me money. He wasnt even bothered. He doesn't call me again, WE DONT GO OUT AGAIN


I don't stress him for expensive outing our wigs or phone.
I bought my phone or trip myself out. He would rather hang out with his friends. He tells his friends and the kids i wear cheap outfits.

My mind is now strong. I don't cry again if he offends me nor complain.

I want to divorce him , sell the car and use it for this UK study route and take my children as dependent without him knowing. I am tired of the marriage already. He is 44 while I am 31. i want to move on with my life.

Sorry for the long write up

Plan your relocation with him take him abroad for the sake of your children. He can never abuse you physically or emotionally abroad cos the police will get him arrested. O

Ok12345:
Na wa oo

What does men want?

See this aunty married someone that sponsored her in school and she is still seeing shege.

Na shege season we dey o

Hi klass99,ur husband still loves u.he is under influence of bad friends.try get ur pastor and family members involved before making any final decision.

FOR EVERY MAN OUT THERE, if you are sponsoring a girl or about to sponsor her in school or Abroad, dump that idea immediatly.
Go out there and search for already made weman and date.