₦airaland Forum

Sit down their the make noise upandan
You are above 30 yet no sign of any responsibility in you🫣🫣🫣🤔🤫
When do you want to settle down? When menopause start or when hookup no pay again? Get married now because soon the strength will no longer be there for you soon. Children wahala at old age no be child play

shortgun:
Dey play.
You are just lazy, your body will pay for your lazy lifestyle in no distant time if you continue to indulge in what you think is comfort.
The human body is not made for a stress-free lifestyle so get your lazy ass to that teeth shining brother's house if you don't want to wither and die.

It's not what you typed up there that makes me mad. It's the fact that the b's garnered over 80 likes.
At times I don't know if some of you guys just comment for cruise sake or y'all being for real

Don't marry pleeaaaaseeeee

EriMma1:
This may sound weird but it's my situation now.

I have been a single and independent lady for a very long time. Though I really looked forward to settling down in my 20s and thirties but because I was the over careful type, I couldn't as I kept being picky due to men's character and behavior.

Fast-forward to my lat 30s, I began to lose interest and started getting more comfortable as a single. The upheavals in today's marriage also got to me. As in the way marriages are packing up, the cheating aspect, abuse and domestic violence in marriages all further affected me and changed my whole perception of the union called marriage. So I unconsciously resolved to remain single as long as I'm happy, comfortable and financially independent.

Some of the reasons I also made up my mind are.
As a single, Im very much at peace, with no one dictating what and when I should do things or get out of bed. I love my bed.
No one is body shaming me when I add on some pounds due to excessive eating and no one is questioning my eating habits as its sometimes the case with some married women. Also running errands when you don't feel up to it just because hubby wants you to do it. Some men can send their wife on errand like crazy and me I hate running errands.

No one is disturbing me when I need time alone which could last for hours. I love my space and privacy. So the thought of having to give up all that scares the hell out of me.

Now, back to the matter.

Recently, some close spiritual leaders in my denomination have been trying to match make me with a single pastor and that one too is shining teeth that he has seen a jimjim sister. When they now openly mentioned it yesterday with the said man around and he too was nodding and agreeing to the proposal, it dawned on me that these people are not joking. When I got home, i sank into my comfy space and began to fret. I mean... The thought of giving up all that freedom is just so scary. I suddenly discovered that marriage no longer excites me and my inner self was fighting it.
Also, the thought of carrying pregnancy for nine months with all the stress of looking after babies, tending toddlers ( poo poo) and that motherhood life made me sick instantly. The thought of joggling my job with family life gave me the chills. I see how my married mates struggle with this. Huh. Men...

I don't know. I don't feel cool about this cos it makes me feel like I'm about to be put in a cage and everything about me is going to change.

Now, before you talk about me not loving the man, I think I fancy him and can love him cos he looks so much like my ex of years ago. So that is out of the question. He is a happening lovable man but....... I no longer feel excited about marriage. at least, from what played out yesterday.

Do I need any form of therapy cos my family won't hear of it but this is my situation now ooo... Hmmm

The Bible makes clear that some people are not supposed to marry. "Some made themselves eunuchs". You may be one of them. If you prayerfully realize that, then forever jettison the idea of marriage. My sister marriage is very very stressful (but it can also be beautiful at times. I love my children. They are very smart. When I see how good they are doing I am so happy. That makes it easy to endure other not-so-sweet aspects of marriage). I've been married for 15 years. I know.
If you think you can't handle all the ups and downs of married life, please stay away from it. No go do yourself in

Excelloque:
The Bible makes clear that some people are not supposed to marry. "Some made themselves eunuchs". You may be one of them. If you prayerfully realize that, then forever jettison the idea of marriage. My sister marriage is very very stressful (but it can also be beautiful at times. I love my children. They are very smart. When I see how good they are doing I am so happy. That makes it easy to endure other not-so-sweet aspects of marriage). I've been married for 15 years. I know.
If you think you can't handle all the ups and downs of married life, please stay away from it. No go do yourself in

One of the few reasonable responses

EriMma1:
This may sound weird but it's my situation now.

I have been a single and independent lady for a very long time. Though I really looked forward to settling down in my 20s and thirties but because I was the over careful type, I couldn't as I kept being picky due to men's character and behavior.

Fast-forward to my lat 30s, I began to lose interest and started getting more comfortable as a single. The upheavals in today's marriage also got to me. As in the way marriages are packing up, the cheating aspect, abuse and domestic violence in marriages all further affected me and changed my whole perception of the union called marriage. So I unconsciously resolved to remain single as long as I'm happy, comfortable and financially independent.

Some of the reasons I also made up my mind are.
As a single, Im very much at peace, with no one dictating what and when I should do things or get out of bed. I love my bed.
No one is body shaming me when I add on some pounds due to excessive eating and no one is questioning my eating habits as its sometimes the case with some married women. Also running errands when you don't feel up to it just because hubby wants you to do it. Some men can send their wife on errand like crazy and me I hate running errands.

No one is disturbing me when I need time alone which could last for hours. I love my space and privacy. So the thought of having to give up all that scares the hell out of me.

Now, back to the matter.

Recently, some close spiritual leaders in my denomination have been trying to match make me with a single pastor and that one too is shining teeth that he has seen a jimjim sister. When they now openly mentioned it yesterday with the said man around and he too was nodding and agreeing to the proposal, it dawned on me that these people are not joking. When I got home, i sank into my comfy space and began to fret. I mean... The thought of giving up all that freedom is just so scary. I suddenly discovered that marriage no longer excites me and my inner self was fighting it.
Also, the thought of carrying pregnancy for nine months with all the stress of looking after babies, tending toddlers ( poo poo) and that motherhood life made me sick instantly. The thought of joggling my job with family life gave me the chills. I see how my married mates struggle with this. Huh. Men...

I don't know. I don't feel cool about this cos it makes me feel like I'm about to be put in a cage and everything about me is going to change.

Now, before you talk about me not loving the man, I think I fancy him and can love him cos he looks so much like my ex of years ago. So that is out of the question. He is a happening lovable man but....... I no longer feel excited about marriage. at least, from what played out yesterday.

Do I need any form of therapy cos my family won't hear of it but this is my situation now ooo... Hmmm

You do not need any form of therapy because there's nothing wrong with you. It's not necessary to get married as the Nigerian society makes it to be. Life is still going to be as good, even If you are unmarried. Marriage is just an institution and you can choose not believe in it, like religion. If you get married without you having the need to do so, then it's a crime, because you will cause misery to yourself and at least one other person.
Have a fantastic day!

My dear marriage is sweet when you marry the right person.

I patiently waited for where you gonna talk about your daily coucumber intake.. buh thank your stars you never mentioned it.
Anyways back to course.. just admit you don't want to be accountable.. simple.

First, what do you want us to do about your situation? Social media is not your counselling room. Go talk to someoe you can confide in, talk to your spiritual leader, talk to your parents and stop looking for advice on the internet.

Good luck with whatever you decide and whatever makes you happy.

I avoid anything pastor joined

MrDetermined:
i think that's the best option for her, if she even gets married it'll only be eye service marriage and feminism of a thing.

Exactly!

KashLord:
Sit down their the make noise upandan
You are above 30 yet no sign of any responsibility in you🫣🫣🫣🤔🤫
When do you want to settle down? When menopause start or when hookup no pay again? Get married now because soon the strength will no longer be there for you soon. Children wahala at old age no be child play

Make una leave this woman. Her mind no dey there.
This kind person fit born pikin, and leave am for her husband, waka leave house, run go America.

ogatboy:
First, what do you want us to do about your situation? Social media is not your counselling room. Go talk to someoe you can confide in, talk to your spiritual leader, talk to your parents and stop looking for advice on the internet.

Good luck with whatever you decide and whatever makes you happy.

Na feminist dey worry OP.
She will only go and consult with other feminists that will tell her to remain single like that.
She no send anybody.

EriMma1

No your body is not fighting marriage, you are just unconsciously afraid of settling with the wrong person.

I vowed to marry only in my 30s, till I met a lady in my early 20s that I felt I mustn't lose.

If you find the right guy, you would be desperate to marry.

1Sharon:
She's in her late 30's?

Early 40s.

Being ready is not about age alone but a mindset. This OP has made it abundantly clear over the course of several monikers that she isn't ready for marriage (apart from being a difficult person)

EriMma1:
This may sound weird but it's my situation now.

I have been a single and independent lady for a very long time. Though I really looked forward to settling down in my 20s and thirties but because I was the over careful type, I couldn't as I kept being picky due to men's character and behavior.

Fast-forward to my lat 30s, I began to lose interest and started getting more comfortable as a single. The upheavals in today's marriage also got to me. As in the way marriages are packing up, the cheating aspect, abuse and domestic violence in marriages all further affected me and changed my whole perception of the union called marriage. So I unconsciously resolved to remain single as long as I'm happy, comfortable and financially independent.

Some of the reasons I also made up my mind are.
As a single, Im very much at peace, with no one dictating what and when I should do things or get out of bed. I love my bed.
No one is body shaming me when I add on some pounds due to excessive eating and no one is questioning my eating habits as its sometimes the case with some married women. Also running errands when you don't feel up to it just because hubby wants you to do it. Some men can send their wife on errand like crazy and me I hate running errands.

No one is disturbing me when I need time alone which could last for hours. I love my space and privacy. So the thought of having to give up all that scares the hell out of me.

Now, back to the matter.

Recently, some close spiritual leaders in my denomination have been trying to match make me with a single pastor and that one too is shining teeth that he has seen a jimjim sister. When they now openly mentioned it yesterday with the said man around and he too was nodding and agreeing to the proposal, it dawned on me that these people are not joking. When I got home, i sank into my comfy space and began to fret. I mean... The thought of giving up all that freedom is just so scary. I suddenly discovered that marriage no longer excites me and my inner self was fighting it.
Also, the thought of carrying pregnancy for nine months with all the stress of looking after babies, tending toddlers ( poo poo) and that motherhood life made me sick instantly. The thought of joggling my job with family life gave me the chills. I see how my married mates struggle with this. Huh. Men...

I don't know. I don't feel cool about this cos it makes me feel like I'm about to be put in a cage and everything about me is going to change.

Now, before you talk about me not loving the man, I think I fancy him and can love him cos he looks so much like my ex of years ago. So that is out of the question. He is a happening lovable man but....... I no longer feel excited about marriage. at least, from what played out yesterday.

Do I need any form of therapy cos my family won't hear of it but this is my situation now ooo... Hmmm

You are not ready and with this mentality of yours you would end up seeing the marriage as a cage,bondage,and stress..Every effort put up by that guy to make you happy would be dead on arrival..

I pray God reveals to him the battle ahead...
Stay single,enjoy ur bed and comforts than to complicate his life please..At old age,you will miss this golden opportunity. Shalom..

EriMma1:
Lol...
Let God's will be done.

Amen!

EriMma1:
This may sound weird but it's my situation now.

I have been a single and independent lady for a very long time. Though I really looked forward to settling down in my 20s and thirties but because I was the over careful type, I couldn't as I kept being picky due to men's character and behavior.

Fast-forward to my lat 30s, I began to lose interest and started getting more comfortable as a single. The upheavals in today's marriage also got to me. As in the way marriages are packing up, the cheating aspect, abuse and domestic violence in marriages all further affected me and changed my whole perception of the union called marriage. So I unconsciously resolved to remain single as long as I'm happy, comfortable and financially independent.

Some of the reasons I also made up my mind are.
As a single, Im very much at peace, with no one dictating what and when I should do things or get out of bed. I love my bed.
No one is body shaming me when I add on some pounds due to excessive eating and no one is questioning my eating habits as its sometimes the case with some married women. Also running errands when you don't feel up to it just because hubby wants you to do it. Some men can send their wife on errand like crazy and me I hate running errands.

No one is disturbing me when I need time alone which could last for hours. I love my space and privacy. So the thought of having to give up all that scares the hell out of me.

Now, back to the matter.

Recently, some close spiritual leaders in my denomination have been trying to match make me with a single pastor and that one too is shining teeth that he has seen a jimjim sister. When they now openly mentioned it yesterday with the said man around and he too was nodding and agreeing to the proposal, it dawned on me that these people are not joking. When I got home, i sank into my comfy space and began to fret. I mean... The thought of giving up all that freedom is just so scary. I suddenly discovered that marriage no longer excites me and my inner self was fighting it.
Also, the thought of carrying pregnancy for nine months with all the stress of looking after babies, tending toddlers ( poo poo) and that motherhood life made me sick instantly. The thought of joggling my job with family life gave me the chills. I see how my married mates struggle with this. Huh. Men...

I don't know. I don't feel cool about this cos it makes me feel like I'm about to be put in a cage and everything about me is going to change.

Now, before you talk about me not loving the man, I think I fancy him and can love him cos he looks so much like my ex of years ago. So that is out of the question. He is a happening lovable man but....... I no longer feel excited about marriage. at least, from what played out yesterday.

Do I need any form of therapy cos my family won't hear of it but this is my situation now ooo... Hmmm

From your statement, I can sense you like freedom and don't want to be submissive and controlled by anybody. And you might also be the lazy-mother type.

But according to Myles munroe, freedom without rules will lead to death. The earlier you understand this the better for you.


It's high time you change your mentality about marriage, and pray for God to give you a good man.
But if you're not ready, pls tell them so they can look for someone else.

Chinny024:
You are not ready and with this mentality of yours you would end up seeing the marriage as a cage,bondage,and stress..Every effort put up by that guy to make you happy would be dead on arrival..

I pray God reveals to him the battle ahead...
Stay single,enjoy ur bed and comforts than to complicate his life please..At old age,you will miss this golden opportunity. Shalom..

Exactly.

Kobojunkie:
Go visit a psychiatrist to get yourself mental help you need abeg!

Thanks

EriMma1:
This may sound weird but it's my situation now.

I have been a single and independent lady for a very long time. Though I really looked forward to settling down in my 20s and thirties but because I was the over careful type, I couldn't as I kept being picky due to men's character and behavior.

Fast-forward to my lat 30s, I began to lose interest and started getting more comfortable as a single. The upheavals in today's marriage also got to me. As in the way marriages are packing up, the cheating aspect, abuse and domestic violence in marriages all further affected me and changed my whole perception of the union called marriage. So I unconsciously resolved to remain single as long as I'm happy, comfortable and financially independent.

Some of the reasons I also made up my mind are.
As a single, Im very much at peace, with no one dictating what and when I should do things or get out of bed. I love my bed.
No one is body shaming me when I add on some pounds due to excessive eating and no one is questioning my eating habits as its sometimes the case with some married women. Also running errands when you don't feel up to it just because hubby wants you to do it. Some men can send their wife on errand like crazy and me I hate running errands.

No one is disturbing me when I need time alone which could last for hours. I love my space and privacy. So the thought of having to give up all that scares the hell out of me.

Now, back to the matter.

Recently, some close spiritual leaders in my denomination have been trying to match make me with a single pastor and that one too is shining teeth that he has seen a jimjim sister. When they now openly mentioned it yesterday with the said man around and he too was nodding and agreeing to the proposal, it dawned on me that these people are not joking. When I got home, i sank into my comfy space and began to fret. I mean... The thought of giving up all that freedom is just so scary. I suddenly discovered that marriage no longer excites me and my inner self was fighting it.
Also, the thought of carrying pregnancy for nine months with all the stress of looking after babies, tending toddlers ( poo poo) and that motherhood life made me sick instantly. The thought of joggling my job with family life gave me the chills. I see how my married mates struggle with this. Huh. Men...

I don't know. I don't feel cool about this cos it makes me feel like I'm about to be put in a cage and everything about me is going to change.

Now, before you talk about me not loving the man, I think I fancy him and can love him cos he looks so much like my ex of years ago. So that is out of the question. He is a happening lovable man but....... I no longer feel excited about marriage. at least, from what played out yesterday.

Do I need any form of therapy cos my family won't hear of it but this is my situation now ooo... Hmmm

That is why it's good to marry very early as woman.. You may feel comfortable now but alot of regret and depression at old age.

You can choose to continue with a celibate life, my daughter. Everyone must not get married, some people are naturally eunuchs. The issues which scare you are mandatory matters arising in marriage, like pregnancy and baby care... pray sef that the kids will come for you to clean their poop because age is no longer on your side.

Don't lead pastor shiny teeth on into misery sweetheart. Open up to the senior pastor trying to link you up, tell him and his wife everything you just told us here. They will provide the therapy you need by thorough counselling, prayers and practical coaching. When you're ready, you can then get married (not to a pastor) or let it go if you don't get better. Don't be afraid or ashamed to tell them; they love and care for you so much to be going so far for you.

By the way, there are many more men like this than there are women. Many men who get married late (40s +/- 5years) become so accustomed to their bachelor lifestyle that they struggle to accommodate the 'intrusions' of marriage: sight of female underwear, children's 'noise', family meals as against the wild varieties they're used to in restaurants and clubs, etc.

The wise ones quickly adapt to their new lifestyle, putting much effort to love the new individuals (wife+children) God has blessed them with but the foolish ones refuse to let singlehood go. They make the poor lady very miserable because they remain "married but single". This is the foundation of persons being 'abandoned' in their old age.

1. Never pressure anyone into getting married or ask aging singles when they will get married. You MAY be throwing an unlucky spouse under the bus if the person refuses to let singlehood go and they will blame you in future.

2. Get married before 30, if possible.

3. If you're getting married to someone who has had a prolonged singlehood (male/female), be aware of these realities and try to be understanding. With your love and support, your spouse will overcome the 'spirit of singlehood' and settle into the marriage.

With this mindset, you will make a hell of a wife. Better to remain single

Kobojunkie:
Go visit a psychiatrist to get yourself mental help you need abeg!

No wonder you are still single at 49, I am sorry for your would be hubby, possessed girl

EriMma1:
This may sound weird but it's my situation now.

I have been a single and independent lady for a very long time. Though I really looked forward to settling down in my 20s and thirties but because I was the over careful type, I couldn't as I kept being picky due to men's character and behavior.

Fast-forward to my lat 30s, I began to lose interest and started getting more comfortable as a single. The upheavals in today's marriage also got to me. As in the way marriages are packing up, the cheating aspect, abuse and domestic violence in marriages all further affected me and changed my whole perception of the union called marriage. So I unconsciously resolved to remain single as long as I'm happy, comfortable and financially independent.

Some of the reasons I also made up my mind are.
As a single, Im very much at peace, with no one dictating what and when I should do things or get out of bed. I love my bed.
No one is body shaming me when I add on some pounds due to excessive eating and no one is questioning my eating habits as its sometimes the case with some married women. Also running errands when you don't feel up to it just because hubby wants you to do it. Some men can send their wife on errand like crazy and me I hate running errands.

No one is disturbing me when I need time alone which could last for hours. I love my space and privacy. So the thought of having to give up all that scares the hell out of me.

Now, back to the matter.

Recently, some close spiritual leaders in my denomination have been trying to match make me with a single pastor and that one too is shining teeth that he has seen a jimjim sister. When they now openly mentioned it yesterday with the said man around and he too was nodding and agreeing to the proposal, it dawned on me that these people are not joking. When I got home, i sank into my comfy space and began to fret. I mean... The thought of giving up all that freedom is just so scary. I suddenly discovered that marriage no longer excites me and my inner self was fighting it.
Also, the thought of carrying pregnancy for nine months with all the stress of looking after babies, tending toddlers ( poo poo) and that motherhood life made me sick instantly. The thought of joggling my job with family life gave me the chills. I see how my married mates struggle with this. Huh. Men...

I don't know. I don't feel cool about this cos it makes me feel like I'm about to be put in a cage and everything about me is going to change.

Now, before you talk about me not loving the man, I think I fancy him and can love him cos he looks so much like my ex of years ago. So that is out of the question. He is a happening lovable man but....... I no longer feel excited about marriage. at least, from what played out yesterday.

Do I need any form of therapy cos my family won't hear of it but this is my situation now ooo... Hmmm

How many inches of Love Machine you using, or you get sugarboi weh deh oil your cuntus... Post your Pic make I check if you fine

efeski:
It's not what you typed up there that makes me mad. It's the fact that the b's garnered over 80 likes.
At times I don't know if some of you guys just comment for cruise sake or y'all being for real

He's right, the op is lazy milf,,,

U are a selfish person.

Sirqt5:
read her post again .... she don leave late 30s. na merychen , cellidora , ellis whatever, same person wey get plenty monikers for NL she don deactivate . she posted on NL 3 years ago on one or two monikers say she was in her 40s . by now she's 43 , 44 yrs old

/
I suspected early 50s when she openly admitted early 30s.

/

ogwumgbe:
No wonder you are still single at 49, I am sorry for your would be hubby, possessed girl

Why do I get the feeling that many of you think those who are single are infact better off hence the reason why you think they need to be put down by you in some way? You no know say na mental problem be that?

Kobojunkie:
Why do I get the feeling that many of you think those who are single are infact better off hence the reason why you think they need to be put down by you in some way? You no know say na mental problem be that?

It's amazing how I even guessed your age and profession. you don't know who is talking to you, better humble yourself if you want solution to your problem

ogwumgbe:
It's amazing how I even guessed your age and profession. you don't know who is talking to you, better humble yourself if you want solution to your problem

Oh, but you didn't guess my age and status correctly at all. However, I did correctly diagnose your situation accurately after all. Please go get help immediately!