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Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? - Family (5) - Nairaland

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See How Much I Give My Wife To Cook Food For Us Everyday / Can I Give Up The Marriage At This Stage..pls Advise Needed / I’m A Graduate, My Husband Is A Welder, We Don’t Belong In The Same Class —wife (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Reminderz: 3:42pm On Apr 02, 2023
EriMma1:
This is why I'll never marry an average income earner because they can complain and press calculator? See all of them here. Calculator pressers.
That is why i advise men not to get married until they have a high income job, to avoid all this kind of headache but no, that small thing dangling under can't wait to start eating what the big boys are eating. They just jump enter marriage with 120k salary and start punching calculator here and there.

So when it comes to giving your wife money, mathematics go enter am?. You can't give her money to maintain that same body you mount every now and then? Na him you turn financial expert seeker/adviser.? SMH. This generation of men have lost it.

Na this kind things make marriage no dey hungry me again because if all a man can offer is to panel-beat my body and not care whether knots and bolts don dey loose or find it difficult to give me when I request, then ill rather live singularly, work and take care of myself without stress or any body knacking me up and down with no benefits or care. abi you wan dey chop me make i no chop you back? Damn! Na wa o.

Oga, give her pocket money. Na that one she go take know say she marry. Men are supposed to spend on their wife's, working class or not. That is why igbos name their wifes Oriakum, "eater of my wealth". It is your obligation to spend on her. I'm guessing you're Yoruba otherwise mouth no go gree you come talk this kind thing outside. I'm sure all your supporters here na Yoruba men. Kobojunkie number one.

you won't let men live, yet you won't let them rest 🤡

no wonder men see no value with staying with you and they keep dumping you like the thrash you are 🤡

ooh I see your past threads and how you've been bleating about men... you just registered this account this year and you've constituted more nuisance than the average person... and it's all because of men giving you sleepless nights and still letting yourself be their cum bag 🤡

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Droyal(f): 3:43pm On Apr 02, 2023
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Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by seanwilliam(m): 3:43pm On Apr 02, 2023
EriMma1:


I'm not saying he should empty his purse for her. A little cash from time to time will go a long way. It will make her feel cherished and loved.

But from the look of thing , largest part of his earnings goes to paying house bills . And I know as a woman, you still expect your man to have investments/savings for the future and plan ahead on how you’ll take care of kiddos.

With all this, knowing fully well he barely has anything left , would you still expect him to give you ‘extra cash’ time to time while you’re working and literally don’t contribute financially to house upkeep?.



Teach me how to navigate this.

3 Likes

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by deltateam: 3:43pm On Apr 02, 2023
MrBrownJay1:


her own salary is her pocket money, and you shouldnt give her a dime. what for? is she your daughter? aint you doing much already? what a failed state of mind to believe that you should now give money to a woman who MAKES HER OWN MONEY and decide to not spend a dime on the family household needs.

That's where she failed. She can't decide to be useless in the home and still claim wife. She's supposed to be supportive maybe she forgot to learn it at her father's house so op needs to package and bundle her back to retake her carryover course.

4 Likes

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by BRATISLAVA: 3:45pm On Apr 02, 2023
MartinsD12:

That useless mindset that her money is hers and your money is for you and her is definitely the height of irresponsibility in marriage, marriage is between two people, you both share everything together in other to make it work , not when a woman is having a parasitic mindset, you earn more than your husband, he pays the bills you still want monthly salary, who are you keeping or making your money for if not for your own family, at times I wonder the kind of useless irresponsible mindset some women in marriage has.

Calculator brigade. Erimma1 is right. Boys that wail at women and money.

The only thing you see that should be equal in marriage is money. Gold diggers disguised as men looking for equality. Equality in only money and nothing else. There's only one type of man who wants equality in money.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by NoToPile: 3:45pm On Apr 02, 2023
After buying food stuffs in the house is the 40k enough for soups, other groceries and other feeding expenses in the house, the answer depends on your tastes.

What do you people eat? Are you a goat meat person, 4 pieces of meat person. Do you guys spend a lot on provisions, toiletries.

Let's say you buy Quarter carton of tiny Titus fish is 8k
Meat - 5k
Chicken - 5k
To manage sef

Thats almost 20k just protein alone, add beverages, other soup ingridents every 4 days, do you guys take veggie soups, fruits etc etc.the 40k itself is already gone


So I think She's already supplementing the feeding and the others if you ask me. Your costs depends on your standard of food.

4 Likes

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Discountsempai: 3:46pm On Apr 02, 2023
Femmyfamous4u:
Hello all, I need to know if I'm doing some things right or over reacting.

My wife and I just married some months ago and we just spend here and there on stuffs. I bought food stuffs in the house and told her I will place her on 40k monthly to cover for soups and all and I expect her to add to it if it's not enough.

I foot all bills- house rent, Power, and all . She earns a decent 6 figures salary also which is slightly higher than mine without the allowances I get.

She expects me to still give her another allowance apart from the 49k I give her for food.

Each time she buys stuff in the house she always want me to pay back in full; most times, I just pay a part of it which she always frowns and complains about.

It appears she has a notion that her money is her money and mine is ours.

My income is more than hers though.

Do you think I should still give her personal pocket money?


Good afternoon

A few months ago...nay, few weeks ago, you were here complaining that your wife does not give you enough seggs, now you are here complaining that she is not providing enough money for you.

Mr man, Nairaland is not the place to seek advice for your marital problems. Infact, speaking seriously, disregard every bit of advice here, and go and seek advice from the church, or from the elders in your family. Not from Nairaland that is made up of poor males who think women are evil, or females who think men are out to get them, or decieve them

Either that, or discuss with your wife. Talk about finances, and then talk about her needs and your needs. And remember, because it is you who came seeking advice, not your wife....that marriage is not all about you...it is about you being self sacrifical sometimes.

Your comment is too much full of i, i, i, i, i.

Anyway, like I said, go and focus on your marriage, and leave Nairaland alone...and stop thinking too much about yourself. Mind...I did not tell you to give your wife money, or let her walk all over you....I said, stop thinking too much about yourself.

And stop bringing your marital problems here. None of us, including me, is qualified to give you advice on married life.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by advanceDNA: 3:46pm On Apr 02, 2023
EriMma1:


I'm not saying he should empty his purse for her. A little cash from time to time will go a long way. It will make her feel cherished and loved.

Feel Cherished and love?? 21st century women ....until a man kill himself...u pple wont feel loved... grin ..


....he is already funding the home alone without her input....but she doesnt see it as anything.......placing her on a seperate salary wont make her see shít cos she is an unkind and entitled person.....

..they are never satisfied and will always feel u should give them more even though they already have their own...

2 Likes

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by NoToPile: 3:46pm On Apr 02, 2023
BRATISLAVA:


Calculator brigade. Erimma1 is right.

The only thing you see that should be equal in marriage is money. Gold diggers disguised as men looking for equality. Equality in only money and nothing else There's only one type of man who wants equality in money.

Hehehe this table you are shaking.

It's only to share bills equality is discussed on Nairaland on other issues husband and wife are not equal ( at least on NL)

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by olamilarks(m): 3:47pm On Apr 02, 2023
Femmyfamous4u:
Hello all, I need to know if I'm doing some things right or over reacting.

My wife and I just married some months ago and we just spend here and there on stuffs. I bought food stuffs in the house and told her I will place her on 40k monthly to cover for soups and all and I expect her to add to it if it's not enough.

I foot all bills- house rent, Power, and all . She earns a decent 6 figures salary also which is slightly higher than mine without the allowances I get.

She expects me to still give her another allowance apart from the 49k I give her for food.

Each time she buys stuff in the house she always want me to pay back in full; most times, I just pay a part of it which she always frowns and complains about.

It appears she has a notion that her money is her money and mine is ours.

My income is more than hers though.

Do you think I should still give her personal pocket money?

Na so my wife start this allowance talk recently, I refused it with a strong face, go and meet your daddy for a pocket money!

2 Likes

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Kobojunkie: 3:47pm On Apr 02, 2023
Femmyfamous4u:
■ It was after marriage but really? is it okay for any lady going into marriage with the mentality of not contributing even though she earns?
1. Culturally, yes it is. That is what culture dictates which is that the man shoulder it all by himself. So, you and you wife need to renegotiate your marriage agreement if you want it different. undecided
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Kobojunkie: 3:48pm On Apr 02, 2023
Raalsalghul:
■ Most Nigerian women don't believe in financially supporting their spouses.
1. Let's me honest. Nigerian culture is to blame for women believing this by default. undecided
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by ukaface(f): 3:48pm On Apr 02, 2023
Did you guys discuss this before marriage?
If you did then why art thou complaining
If you didn’t, why didn’t you? Don’t you know finance is one important thing to discuss before starting a family?

Now you Dey drop question for Nl, Abeg o

1 Like

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by ebenholer2(m): 3:49pm On Apr 02, 2023
BELIEVE IT OR NOT...TO HAVE A LASTING PEACE IN THAT HOUSE, GIVE HER WHAT SHE DESIRES. HOWEVER IF SHE IS AN UNDERSTANDABLE WIFE, SIT HER DOWN AND GIVE HER A TANGIBLE REASON FOR YOUR ACTIONS, AND PRAY GOD TOUCH HER HEART COS MOST WOMEN ARE OBSESSED WITH MONEY

1 Like

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Kobojunkie: 3:49pm On Apr 02, 2023
Femmyfamous4u:

■ There is no deception anywhere. I did not deceive her at all. although somehow the topic did not come up but I felt it is only reasonable to do.
1. Sadly, in the Nigerian context, you have to have that conversation if it is what you want. Assuming it amounts to deception. undecided
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by BRATISLAVA: 3:50pm On Apr 02, 2023
NoToPile:


Hehehe this table you are shaking.

It's only to share bills equality is discussed on Nairaland.

Just to tell you how dishonest their quest for "equality" is.

The calculator brigade are full of it. There's nothing that makes sense to them in a relationship apart from money and how to rail against women's earnings because that's the only fulfillment they will have in life.

They've found the productive women of their wet dreams and extended fantasy. But there must be a catch, as they're never satisfied.

1 Like

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Discountsempai: 3:50pm On Apr 02, 2023
EriMma1:
This is why I'll never marry an average income earner because they can complain and press calculator? See all of them here. Calculator pressers.
That is why i advise men not to get married until they have a high income job, to avoid all this kind of headache but no, that small thing dangling under can't wait to start eating what the big boys are eating. They just jump enter marriage with 120k salary and start punching calculator here and there.

So when it comes to giving your wife money, mathematics go enter am?. You can't give her money to maintain that same body you mount every now and then? Na him you turn financial expert seeker/adviser.? SMH. This generation of men have lost it.

Na this kind things make marriage no dey hungry me again because if all a man can offer is to panel-beat my body and not care whether knots and bolts don dey loose or find it difficult to give me when I request, then ill rather live singularly, work and take care of myself without stress or any body knacking me up and down with no benefits or care. abi you wan dey chop me make i no chop you back? Damn! Na wa o.

Oga, give her pocket money. Na that one she go take know say she marry. Men are supposed to spend on their wife's, working class or not. That is why igbos name their wifes Oriakum, "eater of my wealth". It is your obligation to spend on her. I'm guessing you're Yoruba otherwise mouth no go gree you come talk this kind thing outside. I'm sure all your supporters here na Yoruba men. Kobojunkie number one.



Well, I am a man, and the thing is, marriage is a two way street.

If nether side can contribute to a joint account for the family....then something is wrong somewhere.

There has to be a joint account...for things like food, children etc.

Ah well, that is why nairaland is not a place for martial advice self.

(I wonder sometimes how our parents fared in the good old pre-internet days. )
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Nobody: 3:51pm On Apr 02, 2023
Femmyfamous4u:
Hello all, I need to know if I'm doing some things right or over reacting.

My wife and I just married some months ago and we just spend here and there on stuffs. I bought food stuffs in the house and told her I will place her on 40k monthly to cover for soups and all and I expect her to add to it if it's not enough.

I foot all bills- house rent, Power, and all . She earns a decent 6 figures salary also which is slightly higher than mine without the allowances I get.

She expects me to still give her another allowance apart from the 49k I give her for food.

Each time she buys stuff in the house she always want me to pay back in full; most times, I just pay a part of it which she always frowns and complains about.

It appears she has a notion that her money is her money and mine is ours.

My income is more than hers though.

Do you think I should still give her personal pocket money?
You suppose discuss such thing with her before marriage .

Even if you are dangote you should both agree on responsibilities to handle with your wife.
65 percent from you and 35 percent from her is not bad or even 60 40.

However, take her out to somewhere nice and during your enjoyment time discuss it with her that you would like the both of you to take responsibility of the home so that one person doesn't get depressed .
Ask her an open question
What responsibility would she like to handle in the house?
What ever responsibility she accepts start from there even if it is 80 20 with time she will grow mature but if she doesn't accept to take any responsibility your name is OYO .

Plan B
After about three months she gave you the response that she is not going to take any responsibility;

Tell her you boroad money and you are paying back with interest and cut short the money you give to her.

Since she is working she will adjust .

Lastly,
Give her timely gifts.

Don't gift her as if you are trying to woo her.

You also need to start attending church with her if you don't,it will help .

Modified
She has to be supportive .

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Slynation(m): 3:52pm On Apr 02, 2023
Femmyfamous4u:
Hello all, I need to know if I'm doing some things right or over reacting.

My wife and I just married some months ago and we just spend here and there on stuffs. I bought food stuffs in the house and told her I will place her on 40k monthly to cover for soups and all and I expect her to add to it if it's not enough.

I foot all bills- house rent, Power, and all . She earns a decent 6 figures salary also which is slightly higher than mine without the allowances I get.

She expects me to still give her another allowance apart from the 49k I give her for food.

Each time she buys stuff in the house she always want me to pay back in full; most times, I just pay a part of it which she always frowns and complains about.

It appears she has a notion that her money is her money and mine is ours.

My income is more than hers though.

Do you think I should still give her personal pocket money?
Congratulations...you earned and married a very stingy lady!! But if you can do everything on your own without complains please carry on. Notwithstanding, just have it at the back of your mind your wife will never support you during raining days...!!
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Kobojunkie: 3:52pm On Apr 02, 2023
zed7:
■ My wife works but I foot all the bills because I choose to. Although she buys things for the house on her own accord. I'm a traditional man and I choose to take care of everything. I don't give her an allowance though, just occasional gifts, monetary or in items. I'm not advising for people to do same, split the bills if that's what works for you. My handling all the bills comes with its advantages, my wife doesn't begin to challenge me unnecessarily. When women contribute with you, they start seeing you as equals instead of you being the captain.
1. Femmyfamous4u, this here is the reason. Your wife probably thought she too was marrying a "traditional" man. grin
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by BRATISLAVA: 3:53pm On Apr 02, 2023
Discountsempai:



Good afternoon

A few months ago...nay, few weeks ago, you were here complaining that your wife does not give you enough seggs, now you are here complaining that she is not providing enough money for you.

Mr man, Nairaland is not the place to seek advice for your marital problems. Infact, speaking seriously, disregard every bit of advice here, and go and seek advice from the church, or from the elders in your family. Not from Nairaland that is made up of poor males who think women are evil grin, or females who think men are out to get them, or decieve them

Either that, or discuss with your wife. Talk about finances, and then talk about her needs and your needs. And remember, because it is you who came seeking advice, not your wife....that marriage is not all about you...it is about you being self sacrifical sometimes.

Your comment is too much full of i, i, i, i, i.

Anyway, like I said, go and focus on your marriage, and leave Nairaland alone...and stop thinking too much about yourself. Mind...I did not tell you to give your wife money, or let her walk all over you....I said, stop thinking too much about yourself.

And stop bringing your marital problems here. None of us, including me, is qualified to give you advice on married life.

Lol.

He's even a chronic nagging man. Observe how many boys are preaching with his nagging as if the hope of their lives and relationships depend on it. All naggers. Ghost of Hitler save them.

I will begin to check OP history before reading their tales. The elections are over, so it is back to this type of thread.
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by adaperry25: 3:53pm On Apr 02, 2023
This is my greatest fear in marriage..selfish women everywhere.
That's why men have many side chicks when they have money because no value is placed.

3 Likes

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by seanwilliam(m): 3:54pm On Apr 02, 2023
@op femmyfamous4u, most of these ladies are like that .

Bro, no matter what, ensure you save atleast 20% of your monthly income. Set aside money for gas/transport and little change to enjoy yourself at work , spread the rest on bills and foodstuff, if there’s ‘extra’ give it to her. But ensure the 20% is taken out the moment you recieve salary, make una know how una go manage the 80%..

The thing is, a woman will put you into trouble and still blame you for not being smart enough .


I won’t really blame you that you ignored the flag, truth is 90% of men do. But e never spoil .



Also as it is now, she doesn’t seem like an understanding person so your best bet is to adjust your standard of living to 40% below your income.
If you’re earning 200k monthly , tell her you make only 150k if need be. Out of that 150k, still cut 20% out for savings and make do with 120k. Most of them don’t like it when you have extra money for yourself, you gaz be 5 steps ahead .

7 Likes

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by BRATISLAVA: 3:55pm On Apr 02, 2023
adaperry25:
This is my greatest fear in marriage..selfish women everywhere.
That's why men have many side chicks when they have money because no value is placed.

The side chicks aren't women. And they aren't selfish. Neither are they everywhere.

O...K.

4 Likes

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Kobojunkie: 3:55pm On Apr 02, 2023
00FFT00:
■ Good advice, but you sidestepped the crux of his question, which is, whether his wife is right in her behavior or not.
1.the woman likely believes she married a traditional man. Nothing wrong with that as na dem full everywhere for Nigeria. undecided
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by ebenholer2(m): 3:55pm On Apr 02, 2023
Kobojunkie:
1. Let's me honest. Nigerian culture is to blame for women believing this by default. undecided
YEA NIGERIA CULTURE HAS MADE WOMEN SLAVES OR INFERIOR TO THEIR HUSBAND THEREBY WOMEN EVEN LOOK UP TO THEIR HUSBANDS BEFORE BUYING A COMMON SALT IN THE HOUSE. BUT MOST HOUSEHOLDS WITHOUT SUCH MENTALITY ARE ALWAYS EXTREMELY SUCCESSFUL IN ALL REALMS.
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Raalsalghul: 3:56pm On Apr 02, 2023
Kobojunkie:
1. Let's me honest. Nigerian culture is to blame for women believing this by default. undecided

True.

1 Like

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Blackzero: 3:58pm On Apr 02, 2023
EriMma1:
This is why I'll never marry an average income earner because they can complain and press calculator? See all of them here. Calculator pressers.
That is why i advise men not to get married until they have a high income job, to avoid all this kind of headache but no, that small thing dangling under can't wait to start eating what the big boys are eating. They just jump enter marriage with 120k salary and start punching calculator here and there.

So when it comes to giving your wife money, mathematics go enter am?. You can't give her money to maintain that same body you mount every now and then? Na him you turn financial expert seeker/adviser.? SMH. This generation of men have lost it.

Na this kind things make marriage no dey hungry me again because if all a man can offer is to panel-beat my body and not care whether knots and bolts don dey loose or find it difficult to give me when I request, then ill rather live singularly, work and take care of myself without stress or any body knacking me up and down with no benefits or care. abi you wan dey chop me make i no chop you back? Damn! Na wa o.

Oga, give her pocket money. Na that one she go take know say she marry. Men are supposed to spend on their wife's, working class or not. That is why igbos name their wifes Oriakum, "eater of my wealth". It is your obligation to spend on her. I'm guessing you're Yoruba otherwise mouth no go gree you come talk this kind thing outside. I'm sure all your supporters here na Yoruba men. Kobojunkie number one.

how much did ur father give to ur mother, another lost soul
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Kobojunkie: 3:58pm On Apr 02, 2023
History555:
■ Oga wat are u saying. He is the man, the king, the one who married his wife not the other way round. Must u discuss everything with ur wife. When a man ceases to be a man in a marriage and he woman ceases to be a woman, that marriage is in trouble
1. If he is king and all you claim then OP should not be here asking us this silly question since a man who sits as god over his woman should also carry 100% of the financial weight on his shoulders alone without complaining. OP is here complaining meaning OP no wan be king. undecided

2 Likes

Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Akoko444411: 4:00pm On Apr 02, 2023
Femmyfamous4u:
Hello all, I need to know if I'm doing some things right or over reacting.

My wife and I just married some months ago and we just spend here and there on stuffs. I bought food stuffs in the house and told her I will place her on 40k monthly to cover for soups and all and I expect her to add to it if it's not enough.

I foot all bills- house rent, Power, and all . She earns a decent 6 figures salary also which is slightly higher than mine without the allowances I get.

She expects me to still give her another allowance apart from the 49k I give her for food.

Each time she buys stuff in the house she always want me to pay back in full; most times, I just pay a part of it which she always frowns and complains about.

It appears she has a notion that her money is her money and mine is ours.

My income is more than hers though.

Do you think I should still give her personal pocket money?
OK
Re: Should I Give my working Class Wife Allowance? by Kobojunkie: 4:00pm On Apr 02, 2023
History555:
■ U want the man to kill himself because of marriage
1. A traditional Nigerian man carries 100% of the financial weight in marriage. That is the culture which makes men kings in marriage. So if OP wants to kill himself. Culture sanctions it. undecided

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