Letsmeet:
Please everyone, what's your opinion on this?
Is it wise to date a young lady from a divorced home?
If She is very nice, quiet, respectful, the most understanding person in the world, doesn't even quarrel. Has a good job and many other good qualities.
But if her parents are divorced, and live in the same area, and she lives with both of them.
What is the likelihood of her divorcing in future? Anyone with similar experiences please?

Dey play

kamtrix:

But what of in a case where the lady is well cultured and we'll mannered. The kind that you will never know her parents are divorced unless she tells you? And she is close to both her parents

Until you marry her

Odidigboigbo:
Any man or woman that was raised by a single parents will likely hate the opposite sex that raised him/her up, except he/her has matured before his parents separate. Take your time and visit any home of a single parents and see how the woman or man inconcates and feeds his little child's spirit with hates against the other parent that is not there for him. If he grows up in this manner, tell me how he will like to leave happily with opposite sex?

My point is ....... Not in all cases.... It's always an individualistic battle .......

jaxxy:


it's doesn't matter. it depends on the girl herself especially if the mother has no bad character herself. Not almost divorce was caused bt the mothers some the problem was from the man's attitude and the woman can't control that.

I know a family where the mum is divorced bt her 2 daughters are happily married.

happily married for now

Brush1:

You are wrong.

you're wrong, how, where, ?

kamtrix:

But what of in a case where the lady is well cultured and we'll mannered. The kind that you will never know her parents are divorced unless she tells you? And she is close to both her parents

That kind is rare in Nigeria. Most of them are bitter and destructive. If my son brings a product of a broken home, I will sternly caution him ànd if he insists, I will tell h to just accept anything he sees.

What of the case where the girl is the daughter of the third wife and last wife in a polygamous home but the father is late? Mind you they are not islamic.

I think because of the opportunist ways of women who agree to enter polygamous marriage, usually the man is well off to be able to accommodate the women, all the subsequent wives after the first would raise their daughters tobe materialistic and opportunistic

Foodqueen:
If she have a good relationship with both parent especially her dad, then u can go ahead cos in her mind, she would really wish her parent weren't seperated.

But if she doesn't and always blame her father for everything, then move cos she will put her frustration on you.

This Lady is highly brilliant, I need to follow u on Nairaland

Lexusgs430:



My point is ....... Not in all cases.... It's always an individualistic battle .......

Yes, it might not be 100% but most likely.

CondenseMilk:
Divorce is very dangerous especially to the girl child.

Apart from the death of a partner, bringing up kids as a single parent should be highly discouraged

Divorce is not more dangerous than some types of marriages. Some marriages are more dangerous than divorce. I pray make God nor let us jam o. Rip Osinachi ⚰️⚰️⚰️Nwachukwu. Rip Bimbo Ivd. Rip Chinyere Ogundoro plus Rip Chinyere Ogundoro’s newly married 31years brother (married May 2021) & father of one ( who went to pick her from airport & decided to pass the night ) simultaneously burnt to death alive March 2022 by husband Ogundoro of over 10years.
https://www.nairaland.com/7075888/glasgow-based-nigerian-mother-four#down

korede181:
happily married for now

No married for years with grown children about to finish highschool, 2nd daughter happily married also.

These are close family friends.

Coming from a divorce family doesn't mean u will have such problem unless u urself no get sense.

There are people from parents together who get divorced based on their personal ideology or poor judgment. Many of them are on Nairaland in the romance section.

Divorce is not hereditary.

kamtrix:

But what of in a case where the lady is well cultured and we'll mannered. The kind that you will never know her parents are divorced unless she tells you? And she is close to both her parents

Go and pray about it, no man knows the future except God.

Odidigboigbo:
Yes, it might not be 100% but most likely.

That ''might''...... Is the keyword...... 😁😂

eroticecstasy:


Go and pray about it, no man knows the future except God.

Is this obsession with prayers, that puts people in trouble........ Did oyakhilome, not put his marriage before this fallacy, called prayers.........

Worriedwife:
It looks like kids 4rm divorced homes are only females. What of the male kids from divorced homes,,should they be avoided for marriage?

In most cases, the man is the one that does the choosing. He makes the first attempt and must go for what appeals to him.

komzy589:

In most cases, the man is the one that does the choosing. He makes the first attempt and must go for what appeals to him.

I wasn't expecting a sensible response.

After alot of consultations I just arrived at the fact dat most children from a divorced home usually end up like thier parents, most of all these bitter feminists including those on nairaland are products of a broken home ..did u know that parents play a bigger role in keeping thier daughters marriage together by advising her each time she has issue with her husband..so tell me what kind of advice will such parents give to thier daughter if u eventually marry her n u guys had a quarrel?? Bro use ur head..love is not enough to sustain marriage..watch out 4 d red flags before u put urself in trouble

The answer is capital NO ! But they also carry the scar abi na trauma of the breakup by their parents.

cococandy:
Don’t mind them. The way they are talking as if divorcees are not from two parent homes.

I am more concerned that it is always women they project their stereotypes at. daughters of single mothers,daughters of divorcees, daughters of this and that etc

Like sons of this people are suddenly immune to a negative outcome of such conditions. It's one of those thinly veiled misogyny with the aim of convincing the world that women are more easily dented than men.

Shame though,shame

CuriousStudent:

I am more concerned that it is always women they project their stereotypes at. daughters of single mothers,daughters of divorcees, daughters of this and that etc

Like sons of this people are suddenly immune to a negative outcome of such conditions. It's one of those thinly veiled misogyny with the aim of convincing the world that women are more easily dented than men.

Shame though,shame

Yep always

A man or woman from a divorced home can very likely end up divorced themselves but in these modern days so can someone from a two parent household. The other side to consider is there are many couples in Nigeria that had no business getting married nor staying married. Toxic people, marriages are everywhere. Most though not all women are multipliers. Whatever you give them will be given back tenfold. So the question is would you make a good spouse? Cause if you treat anyone bad enough they can divorce you. Doesn’t matter if they are from a broken home or not! Just my two cents.

kamtrix:

But what of in a case where the lady is well cultured and we'll mannered. The kind that you will never know her parents are divorced unless she tells you? And she is close to both her parents

If she's closer to her dad, she may not end up being divorced. Find out more about her orientation; what she thinks about raising a family, the issue of divorce, respect for husband and stuffs like that. This will help you to determine if she won't end up like her parents

frozen70:


No one enters into marriage to get a divorce

But situations and circumstances always lead to such

Children from divorced homes are not happy about it and will do everything possible to avoid being in that situation especially for the children

What caused divorce in home is the same thing another home managed to get through

So it's about individuals and their attitudes

People enter marriage with the plan to get married. They create scenarios and prepare their mind to divorce.

So yes. People enter marriage with intention to divorce.

kamtrix:

But what of in a case where the lady is well cultured and we'll mannered. The kind that you will never know her parents are divorced unless she tells you? And she is close to both her parents

with time you will realize that it was all pretence and manipulation,just like dating a single mother.

There is an unbalanced psychological issues that will always reflect in her, just pay close attention and you will notice them.


Also think about ya children, she is likely to turn them against you in future.

Foodqueen:
If she have a good relationship with both parent especially her dad, then u can go ahead cos in her mind, she would really wish her parent weren't seperated.

But if she doesn't and always blame her father for everything, then move cos she will put her frustration on you.

You are really wise.

Good girl!

fyzaila:
No they aren't likely to divorce!

Stop all this sentiments. Trust me it won't do you any good. So because she's from a broken home so no man should marry her? From your post, you confirmed she has good attributes and you didn't mention any bad one which means you're ok with her. For her to be from a broken home and still be well disciplined and cultured speaks volume isn't it? Aren't they thousands of girls from unbroken home who have turned to something else that you can't even write home about?

You have found yourself a good woman which is very scarce this days, just pray and follow your heart. Everybody's destiny is different please.

make your comments with lesser emotions,you sound too emotional and personal.

Worriedwife:
It looks like kids 4rm divorced homes are only females. What of the male kids from divorced homes,,should they be avoided for marriage?

this is how you fail exams,just re-read what you wrote up there and the topic in question.

What's the correlation?

Letsmeet:
Please everyone, what's your opinion on this?
Is it wise to date a young lady from a divorced home?
If She is very nice, quiet, respectful, the most understanding person in the world, doesn't even quarrel. Has a good job and many other good qualities.
But if her parents are divorced, and live in the same area, and she lives with both of them.
What is the likelihood of her divorcing in future? Anyone with similar experiences please?

As for me I will not marry a girl from a broken home because her mother could be a very bad influence in her life concerning marriage. Also try to find out why the father of the lady divorced the lady's mother. Don't let love blindfold you please.

If they grew up with their Mum yes but if with their Dad no.

Life is not always in black or white. People who argued that divorce is spiritual are right. Others who argued that it is not are also right.

There are myriad reasons for divorce. Arrogance, ego, upbringing, etc. are some of the reasons.

In my opinion, I do not believe it is spiritual. Some of our forefathers married multiple wives, yet some of their descendants did not toll that path. Most of the problems we think are spiritual are not. Divorce rate in America is twice that of Nigeria. In Portugal the divorce rate is about 97% (I stand to be corrected). Does this mean it is spiritual? I believe it's a culture.

On individual level, I strongly believe divorce is based on principles.

You mentioned your woman is well mannered and cultured, then you have no reason to worry as long as you are good to her. However, if you are a cheat, make sure you know if cheating is a deal breaker for her. Otherwise...

Letsmeet:
Please everyone, what's your opinion on this?
Is it wise to date a young lady from a divorced home?
If She is very nice, quiet, respectful, the most understanding person in the world, doesn't even quarrel. Has a good job and many other good qualities.
But if her parents are divorced, and live in the same area, and she lives with both of them.
What is the likelihood of her divorcing in future? Anyone with similar experiences please?

fyzaila:
No they aren't likely to divorce!

Stop all this sentiments. Trust me it won't do you any good. So because she's from a broken home so no man should marry her? From your post, you confirmed she has good attributes and you didn't mention any bad one which means you're ok with her. For her to be from a broken home and still be well disciplined and cultured speaks volume isn't it? Aren't they thousands of girls from unbroken home who have turned to something else that you can't even write home about?

You have found yourself a good woman which is very scarce this days, just pray and follow your heart. Everybody's destiny is different please.

but what Bout the research that children from divorce home are also prone to divorce in their later life/marriage

CondenseMilk:
Divorce is very dangerous especially to the girl child.

Apart from the death of a partner, bringing up kids as a single parent should be highly discouraged

Most likely, all because they agree not knowing the value